


Fiat Lux

by Nemerosa



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: ALL ABOARD THE ANGST TRAIN, Adventure, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Leia Organa, BB-GR8, Eventual Smut, F/M, Feels, Force Bond (Star Wars), Hurt/Comfort, Little Ben, Poe Dayyyyumeron, Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Romance, Sad Luke, Slow Burn, Sympathy for the Devil
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-19
Updated: 2019-05-27
Packaged: 2019-06-29 11:13:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 20
Words: 79,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15728250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nemerosa/pseuds/Nemerosa
Summary: Rey’s visions have been growing worse ever since her arrival on Ahch-To.Who is this young woman’s body she inhabits during them?Why does she keep being shown HIM?Reylo AU from TFA onwards, with a hint of Damerey!*Originally posted in January 2018,  after writer's block around Chapter 20, have been doing some work to the plot and pacing - see author's notes*





	1. Unto Darkness

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fan work, written purely for the enjoyment of other fans. Disney/Lucasfilm are the owners of all film/Legends/Expanded Universe/canon characters and ideas, I'm merely reworking them into an alternative universe story I wanted to write.

Rain lashes down in sheets, the acrid smell of charred flesh still lingering in the air. A shivering band of captives are corralled into a tight ring by the black-clad marauders who razed their temple, their faces encased by inhuman masks. In the background, a tall shadow prowls around a restrained woman, her soaked grey robes and long dark hair clinging to her slender form.

The cloaked figure which circles her resumes its interrogation.

“I will ask you again _Jedi,_ ” the deep, masculine voice hisses the name of her order, before it continues its questioning, “w _here_ is your _great_ Master now?”

“I can’t…” she utters, coughing violently, as crimson trickles from the corner of her lips.

He pauses in his stride, his head cocking slightly to regard her for a moment, the chill in the air seeming to deepen.

“After _all_ you’ve seen me do here?” he sneers, fixing her with a direct look. The two guards holding her, force her painfully into a kneeling position before the burned Force tree, as she snatches a brief look at the few subdued survivors.

Finding some defiance still within herself, she manages to lift her chin enough to return his gaze, her eyes steeled with resolve, “I _will not_ fail him.”

He lets out a snort of derision, before crouching down in the cold mud to level himself with her.

“I wouldn’t be so sure of _that_. Or are you blind to the devastation which surrounds you?” he laughs, an almost bitter tinge to it.

“You think I can’t tell it’s you, Ben? After all these years…” she all but whispers - averting her eyes for a moment - before returning them to him with a softer, searching look. She wonders where her Master is.

 _Surely, he must have sensed the great disturbance emanating from the ruined Temple, the jagged pain as his students were cut down one after another by the Knights of Ren?_ she thinks to herself.

 She pushes her thoughts aside once more when she sees the effect her words have had on the onyx shade staring at her, its blank visage unblinking.

He jerks, almost imperceptibly, at the name of the boy long dead. Then, curiously, he reaches up and releases the seals on his mask, removing it. The familiar dark hair and pale face she once knew so well looks back at her, older and more angular than he had been. His cold, dark gaze should frighten her more than it does. An ominous silence stretches between them as he continues to stare her down, before he leans into her. It would have the appearance of intimacy to any watching them. His breath is warm against her ear as he seethes, beneath his veneer of control, “ _Ben is dead_.”

His heavy gaze crackles with intensity as he moves back from her to stand once more, “I killed him.”

He watches as the words hit her like he had struck her, before she quickly forces the emotion down, inside. A whimper from one of the younglings over his shoulder snaps the attention of her green eyes away from him for a moment, before they return, hard-edged. An anger she hadn’t known she felt, licks at her bones, burnung its way through her veins. Guilt tugs at her heart too, for letting herself feel it. It isn’t their way, she knows, but she can’t bear to feel the pain any more. To do _nothing_.

“You _murdered_ our fellow Jedi,” she growls.

“I am _no_ Jedi,” he sneers, his look sharp as a blade’s edge.

“No. Not anymore,” she all but whispers. There is silence between them once more, before she speaks again. “ _Why?_ ” She asks, the question hanging in the air between them, its meaning pointed. She can sense the anxiety rolling out from the trapped younglings and padawans in murky waves. “To let you strike fear into their hearts, Ben? To prove yourself to him?”

His nostrils flare enough to let her know that she has prodded that old, deep wound. A pettiness she knows she should not feel, flickers in her sea-green eyes at the knowledge. _Good. Let him feel ridiculed,_ she tells herself. Defiance swells in her chest. Emboldened, she presses home: “ _To win?_ ” she spits at him.

Like a black gale, he rushes at her, fury barely restrained as his hand fixes itself to her jaw forcing her to look at him. His rage is choking in its intensity. She can feel it, palpably from him.

She meets him with a dignified silence this time, knowing she’s bested him. Without violence. Without having to draw her blade. A soft, whisper-gentle pulse reaches her through the Force. _Finally._ She could sense her Master. It is faint, but it is him. A ripple of concern echoes across the distance. He is coming. She knows she has to stall the marauders until he is close enough.

“I will only ask you _once_ more," he roars in her face, snapping her back to reality, his grasp on her jaw firm. His eyes are wild. “Where is your precious Master? I know he’s here. I sensed him as soon as I’m sure you did.”

She persists in her silence, wearing a mask of serenity on her face.

“Answer me!” He snarls, ferocity clearly painted across his sharp features.

Yet, she does not flinch. She wills herself to maintain the courage to defy the one who now wears Ben’s face. Her Master is getting closer, she feels it. He is picking up speed, the silence on the once-busy training grounds must have hit him by now.

 _Almost there_ , she thinks to herself. _Think of Korrin. Think of Vas and Juna. Think of the younglings and the others over there._  Her eyes flicker back across to the captives once more, strengthening her resolve.

 _They’re frightened. They’re depending on you. Be calm. There is only the Force. I am one with the Force and the Force is with me._ She repeats her internal mantra.

“No, Ben,” she responds, firmly, her tone reminding him of a teacher scolding a student. She sees the disbelief flash across his face, a pillar of night in the smoke and rain. He turns away from her to replace his helmet, sealing his once-familiar features away, a stranger once more.

“Have it your way then…” he says, his voice stiff and mechanical even through his mask. He turns back slowly, pausing for a moment to give a strange nod, before continuing. His Knights release her suddenly, shaking her with the unexpectedness, hands jerking forward to catch herself before she falls into the pooling slurry.

Naively – painfully - she thinks that perhaps Ben is still in there, as she slowly pushes herself up onto her knees. _Somewhere_. Perhaps all is not lost. Master Luke will know what to do. Perhaps he could succeed in reasoning with him where she has failed. He’s so close. Almost there.

_Almost there._

She is ripped from her thoughts by the angry hiss of a lightsaber igniting, her head whipping up at the sound.

The one now called Ren swings his crackling blade ferociously in a vicious downward arc.

“Become one with the Force!” he roars.

Shocked gasps and screams erupt from the small group of survivors, as they look on, horrified. He flinches fleetingly at the sound, staring, as he watches her waver on her knees for a moment. Her eyes fly to him, heartbreak pooling within them. Her mouth opens to speak – but no words leave her - just a dreadful, wet gurgling sound, before she crumples forward into the mud. Rain and crimson streak her pale features.

 _Master…_ she thinks, blankness beginning to cloud the corners of her vision.

The last thing she sees is Light.

Straightening himself, he takes in her motionless form for a moment – as if frozen to the spot. Then he nods curtly to his Knights. Their blades flash into existence with a graceful flourish. In unison, they advance on the cowering remnants of the New Jedi Order. Above the sound of the whirling blades, wails and panicked cries echo briefly.

In the distance, a robed figure and a small droid pick their way through the smouldering debris and bodies, surveying the levelled settlement for signs of life. He stops suddenly at a painful stab in his chest, sensing the last survivors being cut down.

 _Wait,_ he thinks.

A faint presence is approaching him fast and he can now make out a young man, a Padawan, sprinting desperately towards him. Relief briefly washes over the young man’s face, but it is for nought. A crimson blade explodes through his chest, pulling him upwards with the force of the blow, before he tumbles limply to the ground. His lifeless body joins the silent forms scattered in the field around him.

“ _No!_ ”, is all Luke manages to howl before he sees them emerge in the dim light, forms illuminated only by the crimson of their blades. Waiting. Shrouded in shadow, their faces obscured by those dreadful, featureless masks.

He senses it then. That terrible, familiar Darkness. He reaches quickly for his lightsaber, cloak billowing as he drops into the familiar stance.

 

* * *

 

Her eyes snap open. Gasping for breath she hauls herself forward, trembling and covered in a cold sweat. Hands still bunched into the blankets she had tangled herself within, she shakily drags them over her eyes, sobbing.

He had killed them.

_All of them._

His peers. His friends.

_Children._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – This fic began life on my old (now-defunct) account.
> 
> I’ve only been writing online for a little while, so I felt this needed a bit of work after hitting plot-block around the Chapter 20 mark. 
> 
> Some of the scenes from the old version will stay with relatively minor changes, some have been replaced/moved later in the plot and there will be new content. However, our overall story trajectory (for now) is the same.
> 
> Sidenote: Some random fanfics I’ve really enjoyed reading have been: Thwarted by Perry Downing, Quietus by AngeLhearteD and Whom Hades Seized by nightsofreylo. 
> 
> I've used a couple of tracks whilst writing this: 'You can't hide from Hades' and ‘Son of the Dragon’ by Ramin Djawadi fits pretty well with this chapter I think in terms of tone.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed Fiat Lux so far, kudos, comments and feedback are appreciated!


	2. Fireside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey deliberates whether to confide in Luke, when they have barely begun to open up to each other. 
> 
> Seeking answers, she may end up with more questions…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to rejig some of the events in this chapter from the way I had it, as based on feedback on the old version from some of my reader’s, it was a little difficult to follow (hopefully that’s been addressed).

Rey and Luke sat together in a not-entirely uncomfortable silence. He hadn’t given her the warmest of welcomes, when she had first arrived, but her perseverance in the face of his gruff reception had caused him to soften – or so she liked to think – as the weeks went on. He still kept his distance and mostly to himself, but he also was no longer refusing to acknowledge her presence. She hungrily tore off another piece of bread and used it to scoop up some more of the simple stew, supressing a laugh as she recalled their first meeting - her hazel, triple-bun styled hair bobbed slightly as she did.

He wasn’t at all what she had been expecting. She wasn’t even sure any more what she should have expected. Everyone had heard the stories of the great Luke Skywalker and there, stood in front of her, he had been – but he wasn’t that young, idealistic young hero anymore. Where once had stood an adventurous, hopeful young man, now stood a weathered, grizzly old recluse. His earth coloured robes were threadbare, his face a craggy maze of deep lines, half obscured by an unkempt beard. His once soft, sun-kissed locks were now a lank mop of dull, greyed strands the colour of desiccated wheat. She had offered him his lightsaber, requested his help for the Resistance, asked him to train her – delivered a message from his own sister – and he had refused.

She could feel Luke’s eyes on her, watching as she wolfed down her food. He hadn’t quite agreed to train her yet, but he hadn’t chased her off from following him for at least a month. He had one day stopped on his way back to their settlement as she tried once more, fruitlessly, to move a boulder. He had let out a loud, cracked laugh when she failed _again_ , prompting her to turn crimson from head to toe with embarrassment, before she snapped at him in frustration. Something softened in his demeanour with her from then onwards.

Rey had determined soon after that it hadn’t been pity, but he wasn’t as off-hand or abrupt as he had been. When she offered him a good morning, he offered her one back. Occasionally, they would have a brief exchange of words, where he would ask her about herself, listening intently to what she shared. He had also begun to critique her when she ran through her staff training and sometimes offered suggestions when she tried to train in the use of the Force. It was small progress, but like every good thing that had ever happened to her in her life, she held onto it tightly.

But then her thoughts drifted back towards what had been dominating her thoughts since she arrived. This meal had been the first time all day that Rey had begun not to think about her nightmare, but she hadn’t succeeded in forcing it from her head entirely. She frowned deeply, her hazel-green eyes narrowing, as it filled her mind once more.

_Why her? Of all the people that had to be plagued by these dreams…_

They came every night now. _He_ came every night now. It had gotten so much worse since she had arrived here. They seemed to be growing more frequent, now that Luke had begun to take even a modicum of interest in her.

“You seem withdrawn, Rey. Is something troubling you?” Luke enquired, his voice low and soft.

She couldn’t bring herself to meet his gaze, knowing now that he could sense her turmoil. She hadn’t even been ‘difficult’ with him this week. Rey didn’t want to tell him about the dreams. The dreams that she’s been having since _he_ had interrogated her on the Starkiller.

She thought they had been just another vision at first, some jumbled mess of images, like the one she had experienced on Takodana.

She worried about the ones where she thought she heard _his_ voice - they chilled her the most.

She didn’t realise that the Force had instead been showing her memories of _his_ turn. Of the moment Kylo Ren had snuffed out Luke Skywalker, the champion of the New Republic, leaving behind a ghost of a man.

With Luke’s pale eyes still upon her, Rey shifted slightly in her seat.

“You’ve had students before, haven’t you?” she blurted, an almost defensive edge to her voice, as she answered his question with a question. Before she could stop the words leaving her mouth, they were already out, hanging in the quiet between them. Disgusted with her own lack of control, Rey tried to excuse herself from the table.

As she pushed herself away from their improvised dining area, Luke broke the silence.

“…Yes…” he answered quietly, eyes suddenly downcast.

“I didn’t mean to-,” Rey began, her voice almost child-like in its smallness. Before she could continue again, Luke held his palm up to her before he spoke.

“Don’t. Don’t apologise. You are not the one that caused me pain, Rey,” He sighed. Despite the evenness of his voice, she could sense the tinge of sorrow in his tone. Slowly sitting back down, Rey blinked in shock. Had Luke _actually_ answered one of her questions about his past, the past had heard Han once mention?

 _Han…_ The loss was still jagged and raw for her. They had only spent a brief time together, but she had felt an affinity for the cantankerous old rogue. An affection. Now he was gone. She had watched with Finn as that _monster_ drove a blade into his own father.

She watched Luke carefully. Nervously. Unsure if she had just overstepped a mark in terms of their fledgling relationship.

“I had many: younglings, Padawans and Jedi Knights.” He flinched slightly at the sound of 'had'.

“What happened to them?” Rey asked, rapt, but still cautious of whether Luke would once again shut down at any more of her innocent questions.

“They were betrayed... by one of their own. One who I had such high hopes for…” His voice trailed off, a faraway look overtaking his weathered features.

“ _Ren?_ ” she offered, quietly. Luke’s eyes met hers briefly.

“Ben…” he whispered, leaning back into his chair. He ran his artificial hand through his shaggy, greyed hair.

Leaning forward onto her elbows slightly, her hazel-green eyes shone in the firelight. “You cared for him?” she wondered. Truly, she did.

 _How_ could _anyone_ care for that – that _creature_ , who hides behind a mask… who had cut down his own father in cold blood?

“He was blood. My family. He was _so_ promising. We all wanted him to surpass me. _Which he did..._ ” Luke said, eyes holding hers steadily.

Unsure about whether she should really continue this line of questioning, as she could sense the unease and sadness radiating from her weary Master, Rey’s curiosity had gotten the best of her. As if sensing her slight trepidation, Luke’s gaze was warm, the crow’s feet surrounding his eyes crinkled as he smiled. It was a sight she had only briefly glimpsed once before. She imagined knowing what she did now, that it wasn’t something he did often any more.

“An inquisitive mind is not something to be ashamed of, Rey, Master Yoda taught me that,” a small grin was visible beneath his beard. “It is good to finally speak freely like this.”

Smiling her own small smile back at him, Rey nodded in agreement, “Yes, it is.”

“Now… Shall we discuss what’s bothering you then?” Luke asked, his eyebrows knitted together slightly, but with a gentle laugh to his voice.

Her more-jovial expression then grew solemn at his question, slender fingers worrying at her light-grey linen arm wrappings, whilst she deliberated with herself how to begin.

“I… I saw him…” She murmured, eyes averted, “I saw what he did…” She couldn’t bring herself to mention the rest, not yet.

Silver eyebrows raising in surprise, Luke regarded her quietly. Unable to meet his calm gaze, Rey fumbled with her words, unsure whether to continue.

“How _much_ did you see, Rey?” He pressed, concern creeping into his timbre.

“It felt like a vision. Except not,” she said hurriedly, adding, “this was more real than the vision I’d had on Takodana. I felt like I was there. Like I was one of your Jedi. One he murdered.”

She didn’t want to fill him in on the familiarity she felt when she saw the young female whose life he had ended. How _cold_ she had felt. Eyes glinting in the firelight, she tried to hide the emotion bubbling into her voice, but the dreams were taking their toll on her.

“Rey…” Luke rose from his seat to move to her, as her shoulders started to heave with the effort of trying to fight back the tears she knew were coming.

“ _He killed them_. He killed them all. _Just like Han…_ ” She wept, covering her eyes with one of her arms as she tried to use the wrappings to wipe the tears away. Sobs wracked her body as she fought internally about telling the old Jedi Master about the _other_ dreams – the ones where she heard _him_ call out to her. _No_ , she told herself, _this is enough for now. Let’s try to understand what this is first, we can figure the rest out later._

“I should have told you sooner…” she murmured, trying to fight back the tears still forming at the corners of her eyes.

“Yes. You should have… but that doesn’t matter right now. What matters is that you found the courage to tell me,” Luke answered, resting his hand on her shoulder, his blue eyes meeting hers. He smiled encouragingly down at her.

“Come,” he said, offering her his hand, “let us sit by the fireside and you can tell me _exactly_ what you saw. Dreams can be powerful portents, Rey.”

Stray tears still rolling slowly down her cheeks, Rey tried to blink back those still waiting to fall. Unease filling her every fibre, she grew anxious that Luke could sense she was keeping something back. His smile however, was still evident. Slowly taking his hand, she stood, and they moved to the soft mats by the fire.

“Now,” Luke began, “tell me everything.”

So, Rey began to recount everything that she had seen in the most recent vision. Dream. Whatever it was. Explaining how real it seemed, how real it had felt when Ren had struck her down.

 _Not her. Not really._ But she had _felt_ whatever that poor woman had - _so vividly_ \- that she was still weeping softly as she finished her account. Luke regarded her out of the corner of his eye, the shadows cast by the firelight making it difficult for her to discern his reaction. She still couldn’t read him yet. Let alone sense _anything_ from him. The quiet widened between them for longer than she was comfortable with. She fidgeted nervously as they continued to sit there, startled when he finally chose to speak.

“It is… _unusual…_ for one to recall a memory that they have not lived,” Luke noted, his piercing gaze now fixed straight into her own. “How long have you been experiencing this Rey?”, he asked, eyebrows furrowing.

“Longer than I should like…” she muttered. _Long enough_ , she thought bitterly.

“Perhaps there is a reason that the Force is showing you these ‘visions’,” he pondered, his hand bracing his knee as he slowly stood.

 _Why me? Why this woman? Why Ren?_ she wondered.

As she stood to follow, Luke reached out for her with his prosthetic hand, smiling faintly. If it was an attempt to reassure her, Rey felt even more anxious now.

 _He must have some idea, he has to…_ she told herself, trying to find a small measure of the optimism that she sometimes could. She’d always dreamt of leaving her lonely and dusty existence on Jakku behind. Of adventure out amongst the stars. Of the Jedi. Of any of the few stories she could trade parts for, to keep her mind occupied in the cold night.

_Of her family._

But not like this. Not haunted by memories that weren’t hers. Memories of that creature in a mask, who butchered his own father.

“I will meditate on this further, perhaps one of the texts may shed some light on what is happening here…” Luke offered, bringing Rey out of her rumination momentarily.

 “Do… Do you think this is something that _has_ happened before?” she asked warily, careful to keep her tone as even as possible, trying not to betray the fear she felt.

“Well I may look like a scholar, Kid, but I’m not sure even Master Yoda could recall every single line of those texts!” he laughed, patting her softly on the shoulder. He bid her good night and left her there, standing by the dying fire, alone with her thoughts again.

A shiver ran through her as the shadows started to lengthen with the dwindling flames. Ever since Starkiller, she was on edge whenever she was alone, and it grew dark. She saw _him_ everywhere. In every shadow. Heard that voice echo in the recesses of her mind.

 _No._ _You are not some frightened child, lying in a tin can in the desert any more. Afraid of every noise. Of the dark…_ Rey willed herself silently to be strong.

But she was afraid. She was afraid that if she looked at any of the shadows long enough, she would catch the glint of that awful mask. Steeling herself, she put out the smouldering timber in the fire and gathered her things, before leaving for her chamber.

She knew that she needed sleep, she could feel it in the ache of her muscles, the nipping of her eyes and the dull throb in her head. She also knew that if she slept, she’d see something again. She _knew_ she would. So, she chose instead to slump onto her cot until she could at least get rest for her tired body. She lay there for a while, trying to think of the friends she had left behind. Of where they might be and what they would be up to. Her thoughts dallied on Finn.

_Finn…_

Rey couldn’t help but smile when she thought of him and that damned, innocent, look he had when BB-8 had accused him of stealing that jacket. He had, in a way, rescued her from that dull existence in the desert – despite her protests at the time. If it hadn’t been for him, she might never have had reason to leave Niima Outpost and the endless dunes of Jakku behind her. She hoped that he was healing well, he had to be. He had the best medical care that the Resistance had to offer. General Leia had promised her as much.

She knew she could trust her. Unlike her ever-guarded brother, Leia was open, her feelings free. She always spoke her mind. Articulate and graceful, Rey admired her greatly. She inspired hope and courage in those around her - something Rey hoped she could emulate, even if she didn’t always feel those things herself. It puzzled her that such a woman had given life to… _that thing cloaked in darkness_. She had seen its face once. One that had looked so human, underneath it all.

None of that changed the fact that he was the one that had put Finn in the state that she worried he might never wake from. Having human features didn’t change the fact that he had taken the life of his own father, of countless others. She wondered what Master Luke had ever seen in him. What any of them had.

Some of the dreams she had experienced seemed to show glimpses of another side of him. _From before_.

Rey’s eyes began to lose focus and she realised that she could no longer fight the exhaustion she felt. She slid below the blankets and tried her best to empty her mind, as sleep took hold.

For a time, it felt as if she wandered in a dense fog. When it cleared, and the colours grew bright and vibrant, she was herself still, but at the same time… not…

 

* * *

 

 

“What troubles you, my Padawan?” a more youthful Luke enquired, turning from his survey of the horizon.

“I… I sense something terrible is coming Master. Something I’m not sure we can face. _Not yet_ …” a female voice spoke, but it was not her own voice. _The woman_ , Rey realised, the one from her other dreams.

“I see…” he replied, his tone calm. “Do you feel where this _something_ is coming from?” his eyes flicking up to meet hers.

“From within,” the woman’s soft tone took on a grave edge, as she turned her gaze downwards, head bowed.

“We will keep watch for anything out of the ordinary,” he responded, blue eyes fixed on her as he gripped her shoulder, “I _promise_ you that”.

Her eyes rising again to meet his, she smiled briefly. “Thank you, Master Luke,” Rey could sense that the young woman hoped that the gratitude she felt in her heart had made it to her voice. Her Master had taken the time to listen to her concerns, as strange as they may seem. The maiden bowed, turning to leave, blue-grey robes swirling as she did. Starting down the grassy slope back in the direction of the youngling grounds, she saw a young man approach – an olive-skinned Zabrak.

“Aren’t you supposed to be leading a _class_ right now?” the taller male noted, his amber eyes narrowing in mock-suspicion.

“Yes, I suppose I was,” the woman chuckled, her previous worries melting away at the sight of her friend, “aren’t you already supposed to _be on_ sentry duty, Korrin?” she retorted, arms folded across her chest, eyebrow quirking in playful challenge.

“ _Someone_ was asked to cover a class on basic defensive techniques. At the last minute,” he laughed, his voice deep and warm. “It seems the tutors just _aren’t_ what they used to be…” he trailed off, rolling his eyes dramatically and dodging a mischievous swat from the other Jedi.

“Well, I suppose I should go and see to that then,” she smiled warmly, beginning to move on her way again, her long whisky-coloured hair flowing behind her.

“Yes! I suppose you should!” He shouted after, waving her off.

 _Force knows what I’m walking into down here_ , the woman thought, shaking her head. _Korrin could have been showing them anything..._ As she continued down the hill, closing in on the training grounds, she could now see the chaos on the field. An instigator standing in the middle of it all.

“ _Ben Solo!_ Would you put your partner _down_? This is a defensive techniques class, _not_ a cantina brawl!” she muttered exasperatedly, catching him off guard and using the Force to pull the two battling boys apart. Silence fell instantly upon the unruly class.

“I expected better of you,” she turned, facing the boy with whom he’d been fighting. “And _you_ ,” she whirled, now turning on Ben. “I expected _even better_ of you,” she all but growled, index finger raised in warning. He blushed at that, shame spreading from his cheeks to the tips of his ears, half-hidden under the messy mop of black waves. Sighing, she rose to address the rest of the class.

“What _had_ Tutor Gan Reval been instructing you in, before he was called away?” she asked, her stern eyes pushing her class for a response.

“He… had been teaching us how to use the Force to push, pull or hold multiple moving objects static”, offered a young girl to the middle of the group of young teenagers.

“But that was before _they_ started fighting”, piped up a Togruta boy to the rear.

“Right. Well, the rest of you can resume your training. I will be round to review your form momentarily and to answer any questions you might have,” she stated.

Turning once more on the two trouble-makers, “ _You_ have cooking detail. _For a week_ ,” she stated firmly, dismissing the other culprit with a flick of her wrist. “And as for _you_ … _What were you thinking?_ ” she pressed, her stony gaze fixed now on Ben.

“I…”, despite his initial defiance, any form of rebuke to her died on his tongue. “He… said I didn’t deserve to be here. That the only reason I’m here is because my mother _wanted me here_ and my father… _didn’t want me…_ ” he breathed, unable to look at her, the first tears pricking his eyes. Afraid of the disappointment he would find in her eyes.

“ _Ben…_ ” the young woman exhaled softly, her expression softening, sensing the sadness and loneliness trickling out from the young soul before her.

 

* * *

 

 

Rey stirred. Light filtered in through the threads of the thick, insulated fabric flap she had pulled over the timber shuttered window to her living space. It was early, but she could not yet hear if Luke was awake, the only sound to her ears was the distant crashing of the waves and the faraway dawn cries of the strange feathered creatures that resided on the cliff faces.

She felt confused. She could not tell whether the feeling of pity she felt for that young boy was her own, or that of the woman’s, the one whose form she shared in her dreams. They shared the same breaths, feelings and thoughts within those dreams.

 _That sadness and loneliness..._ Rey thought, she knew it all too well.

She knew it all too well. She had lived with it for almost all her life, but that had not made her into a monster.

She could not understand what he was now.  

 _How_ had that lonely young boy become Kylo Ren?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This originally began life as my old story ‘Fiat Lux’ on my old (now-defunct) account.
> 
> Specifically, I’ve decided to shift Luke deciding to actually train Rey to a little later in the story. I wanted to more closely reflect on him being withdrawn (kind of like he was in the film, but that he was at least beginning to open up to her a bit here). 
> 
> I've used a couple of tracks whilst writing this:- 'The Last Iron Lord'; 'Lords Lost' - Michael Salvatori, (down to Rey returning to her chambers) – I think these tracks work pretty well in conveying a sense of foreboding and regret. 'Remembrance' - Michael Salvatori, (Rey's Dream) – I thought this connoted a sense of a more hopeful, happy memory better. Something almost bittersweet.
> 
> Sidenote – A fanfic I’m really enjoying is Burnt Bacon by waterliyrose – I really love it as an AU. 
> 
> Kudos and comments are more than welcome - I hope you're enjoying Fiat Lux so far! (If you are, please let me know as I'd love to hear from you :D)


	3. Unexpected Guests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Familiar faces drop in for an unexpected visit. Some are welcome, others not quite as much…

Rey started her day as she generally did, rising with the bright sun and changing into a loose, grey pair of trousers and matching vest and arm wrappings to go and train in – snagging her brown, worn boots on the way out. Before she left the small hamlet, she headed to the central chamber to start a fire, careful not to over-stoke it. Once that was done, she took a few moments to work the knots in her back out and left to go and begin her morning practice in a lush grassy field, above one of the lower cliffs. Inwardly, she hoped that _maybe_ today would be the day Luke agreed to train her, but the harsh voice in her mind which had kept her alive in the wastes of Jakku told her not to get her hopes up.

Another voice, the one she heard loudest during the quiet moments she tried to calm herself, repeated the offer she had been given in the snow on Starkiller. She shuddered.

Shaking her head in a futile attempt to rid herself of the memory, Rey decided to begin running through her staff work. She twirled the well-worn metal staff around her right side in a flourish, swinging it down in a heavy arc on the return and followed up with a sweeping kick behind herself, as if fending off an unseen assailant. She rolled forward, tucking herself into it before using the staff to vault herself up into the air, after she briefly landed on her feet.

She pushed herself harder and harder as she continued, eventually beginning to sneak-in some more improvised strikes with her small, curved knife. Furiously, she whirled and spun, the invisible attackers she imagined herself fighting apparently growing in number. As she fell into her final position, she smirked, satisfied that her time away from fending for herself had not dulled her skills for scrapping.

“ _Impressive_ ,” laughed Luke from behind her, a single, cracked laugh that she had only heard him make once before.

Rey nearly jumped out of her skin with fright. He’d snuck up on her. _Again._ Turning to face her spectator, she bit back the urge to give him a piece of her mind. He stood further up the slope above the field, leading back to the settlement. His grey robes made him look as if he had been carved out of the very stone which formed their island home, a granite pillar, unmoving and stoic.

“Isn’t it a bit _early_ for you to be up?” she said, her tone mocking. It was rare that Luke was up before her and she genuinely _was_ curious as to the reason for his arrival.

“Seems that way,” he laughed again, expression unreadable at this distance.

To her surprise, instead of shuffling off after their brief exchange, he stayed. Slightly apprehensive, but a small glimmer of hope fluttering in her chest that today _really might_ be the day, Rey moved to grab her canteen – warm from her workout.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said,” he shouted down to her, as he began to walk down the slope, cloak flowing in the wind behind him.

Rey took a large swig of water, strands of her hair which had worked their way free from her topknot plastered to her forehead and cheeks, slick from her exertion. By the time she had caught her breath again, Luke was standing beside her, his eyes now out to the sea. She followed his line of sight, as if watching the horizon for something, a strange expression on his face. She didn’t know if she’d ever get used to seeing so much water. Having grown up as she did, it had always been a precious resource. Seeing it in such an abundance had made her pause for a few moments, when she had descended from the Falcon’s ramp, as she first set foot on Ahch-To. She hadn’t had time to properly appreciate such a view at the time, but she found it was something which she did in many of her free moments. She felt a stillness she hadn’t known on Jakku, whenever she did.

Part of her supposed that the vast expanse of water that lay before their rocky island, was not so dissimilar to the dusty, dry one she had left so far away. The climate on the other hand, was something which she hadn’t truly been prepared for: instead of dry air and oppressive heat, they had near-constant winds and temperamental skies to contend with.

“The hearth was lit, have you eaten yet?” enquired Luke, turning back to face her briefly.

“I thought I’d make a start on breakfast when I got back, so that it would be ready when you _eventually_ rose from your chambers…” she stated matter-of-factly, sarcasm dripping in her tone.

Luke laughed his loud, cracked laugh that seemed to be reserved for when she did something he found amusing, once more in response. “I found some interesting passages during a break from my meditation,” he noted after he had finished, watching her reaction.

“What did they say? Did they give any indication as to what it might be? If this is permanent? Anything?” she asked, her excitement bleeding into her voice.

“Patience, Rey,” he replied, placing a hand on her shoulder, “I know this is troubling you, but you must be patient.”

“…Of course. It’s just-,” she started, but before she could finish, Luke cut her off.

“I know you want answers, but this will take some time to unravel. It’s certainly not something I’ve come across in my studies before. Not in this form, anyway…” he offered, upon catching the flicker of frustration across her face.

“I understand”, she responded, voice betraying her disappointment.

“Come, let’s go make up something to eat,” he encouraged, beginning to walk off back towards their camp, pausing to wait for her while she grabbed her things.

Pushing aside her dejection at a lack of answers, she followed after him.

She was pleasantly surprised when they arrived in the shared kitchen space, that Luke already had a creamy concoction gently bubbling away over the fire. He sauntered over to it, spooning out a measure to taste. Another thing she would probably take a long time to get used to. Readily available and _abundant_ food. A lifetime of scavenging and trading what little she could gather for scraps was difficult to shake, so when he offered her a bowl of what he simply called ‘porridge’, she happily took it from him and hungrily ate away. Something she noted had not gone unnoticed by Luke. It was the reason she suspected that she often caught him watching her eat.

Luke had returned to sit on the other side of the large, flat stone work surface which doubled as their table, making a start on his own meal.

 As they ate, their domestic quiet was broken by the growing roar of 2 ships breaking atmosphere in the distance. Casting unsettled glances at each other, they both turned towards the sound. Unable to make out the shape, Rey was relieved when he moved towards the door and after watching the skies in silence for a moment, he turned to her, smiling.

“Leia,” he said, warmth in his eyes. Rey could sense the love from him, it was almost tangible in the air. She blinked briefly at the realisation that this was the first time she had sensed _anything_ from him.

Moving to stand beside him, Rey could now make out the distinctive shape of the returning Millennium Falcon, with a smaller ship flying off to its right.

 _An escort?_ she wondered, watching as the smaller ship suddenly tore off in a steep ascent angle, eventually levelling off and beginning a wide circle. She could faintly make out a black and orange colour scheme as it shot over where she and Master Luke now stood, outside their communal living space, its wings dipping side-to-side as it passed above.

_An X-Wing._

An X-Wing had _waved_ at them. Rey couldn’t help but grin.

The Falcon’s drive engine began cycling down as it came in to land on a wide cliff below them. The X-Wing meanwhile, completed its perimeter sweep, before dropping into a steep dive as it came in on its approach. Straightening out, it swung around sharply as its engine quietened, hovering above the lower cliff for a few moments before its pilot smoothly landed it, with barely a sound.

“Well, I suppose we should go and greet our unexpected guests,” said Luke, peering over his shoulder as he began to head for the steps leading down the cliff face. “Are you coming?” he asked, expectantly.

Nodding swiftly, Rey fell into step next to him and they made their way down the gently curving stone stairs to the landing site. In the time it had taken them to reach the bottom, the ramp had lowered on the Falcon, with Leia walking down it. She was garbed in a high-necked, midnight blue dress, with a darker wrap clasped around her shoulders – held there by an elegant silver brooch like tangled vines. Her silvered brunette hair was twisted into a soft, flowing bun, pinned delicately. Rey quickly noted that she was addressing that _awkward_ gold droid and a few attendants, before she slowly turned away to meet her grinning twin.

“Luke,” Leia breathed, beaming warmly, “it has been _far_ too long…” she opened her arms to greet him, her brother returning her embrace, before they pushed back – still holding each other’s shoulders.

Rey noticed the searching gaze they shared, as if some silent communication was taking place.

“ _It has…_ ” he answered, lips turning up at their corners slightly. Rey watched as his head dipped at this, shaking gently.

Catching sight of Rey standing off to his right, Leia now turned her smile to the slender young woman, “And I’m glad to see you as well, dear.”

Sheepishly returning her smile, Rey bowed her head in respect, before responding in kind, “And you, General.”

“ _Please._ Han would _hate_ to hear you call me that,” Leia chuckled, her hand waving as if to dismiss her title, her cracked laugh so similar to her brother’s.

A loud call from the ramp, let Rey know that Chewbacca had also accompanied Leia. Laughing, Rey ran over to welcome him, instead finding herself enveloped in a firm hug and continued soft groans, once she reached him.

“Yes, yes. I missed you too!” her muffled voice escaped through the Wookie’s thick fur.

Releasing her, they slowly walked back over together, to the rest of the group. As they passed the X-Wing which had escorted the larger ship in, Rey caught a glimpse of the pilot, still clearly going through their post-flight checks. She recognised the ships marking’s vaguely from somewhere before but couldn’t quite place them.

“I’ll catch up to you,” she smiled up at her companion, hazel eyes shining with joy at seeing him again, as he softly cried back in acknowledgement before resuming his course.

She wandered over to the smaller craft, taking in its sleek lines in wonder. She’d never seen a fully intact one up this close before, her visits to the Resistance base on D’Qar having been rushed and consisting largely of her being moved from one secure room to the next. The pilot was still towards the aft of the vessel, deep in discussion about something with their astromech, who she also couldn’t see. From the voice she could tell that the pilot was male, but only their boots and the bottom of their orange flight suit were visible.

“Well buddy, I know you think I pushed her too hard on our way in, but we’ve been doing this together a long time now…” they said, before continuing, “I thought you’d have a _little_ more faith in me?” Still unable to get a good look at him, all she could see were his arms gesticulating wildly.

 _For effect?_ Rey wondered, she wasn’t sure.

A series of loud, fluctuating beeps and whistles came in response, from which she could gather the little astromech was unhappy about something.

“ _Oh really_ , is that so? This is _really_ the _worst_ flying you’ve _ever_ seen?” the pilot continued to bemoan, “I thought that you said that was during one of your ‘adventures’ with Finn?”, he snickered, continuing his inspection once more. “ _Wow_. Just wow. I never knew you could be this harsh!”

What sounded like the electronic equivalent of: ‘you’re an idiot’ followed.

 _Finn. This person knows Finn._ Her heart leapt at this new piece of information.

Continuing round the fighter slowly, tracing its X-foils with her fingers, she felt something bump into her foot.

Tilting her head down, she saw a familiar little orange and white droid peering up at her. Letting out a happy squeal, it rolled into her foot again with more force, nearly knocking her off her feet. Then again, harder and succeeded in its apparent mission. Rey landed on her back with a dull thud - some of her chestnut coloured hair having been knocked out of her topknot, before the sphere rolled up to her head, as if to nuzzle it. Rolling rapid circles around her, spinning as it went, the little droid continued its string of beeps and she couldn’t help but giggle, a musical, hiccup-y sort of sound.

“BB-8!”, she sniggered, catching the little droid on its next orbit and pulling it in for a cuddle.

“BB! What have I told you about beeping to strangers?” yelled the pilot, still hidden from view, provoking a sad, low whistle from the spherical astromech. One Rey was sure amounted to: ‘to not to...’.

“It’s fine, really, BB and I are _well_ acquainted,” she beamed down at the little droid, resting her hand on its head, as it rolled slowly side to side in renewed joy. Pulling away from her suddenly, BB-8 trundled off to the back of the X-Wing. With a loud clatter and clang, she heard it collide with what she could only assume was one of the landing gear and watched as a datapad came crashing to the ground.

“Did you _really_ need to do that?” came an exasperated cry from the droid’s master, before letting out a soft growl of frustration, “Oh really, you did? _I’m_ being rude? Well I don’t know buddy, I didn’t just knock your datapad out of your hand!”

Stifling her giggles with her hand, Rey dusted herself off and straightened her grey linen pants and vest. Whoever this was, she didn’t want to upset him further, as it already sounded like he’d had quite the day. Making her way fully to the rear of the craft, she could _just_ make out a tousled mess of dark curls and tanned skin as the pilot rooted around, spinning this way and that, trying to find the errant ‘pad. Spotting it by her foot, she picked it up. “Oh, here,” she offered, shyly.

“Thanks,” his cheerful voice responded, turning around to flash her a wide grin that Rey couldn’t help but return. She missed his warm brown eyes running swiftly over her lithe form. He stood, soft black curls falling to frame his handsome face, in a side-swept style.

“I take it this is _your_ ship?” she asked excitedly.

Suddenly realising how stupid she must have sounded, _of course it’s his ship_ , she found heat rising rapidly in her cheeks.

“Yeah, she is,” he responded slapping the hull, not even noticing what Rey was embarrassed about, “…and this little guy, it seems you already know,” the pilot beamed, as he gestured down towards his small metal friend.

Rey averted her eyes, when she realised she was staring at the man.

 _Force_ , she admonished herself, _it’s not as if you’ve never seen a human man before. Yes. He’s attractive._

She was snapped out of her internal chiding when she felt a large, warm hand envelope hers in a firm handshake.

“I’m Poe. Poe Dameron,” he smiled brightly, finally releasing her hand, which she was suddenly more aware of, after their brief contact. His kind brown eyes seemed to urge her on to respond, expectantly.

“Rey…” she replied softly, her cheeks flushing a deeper shade of red. When she didn’t follow up with a surname, Poe didn’t seem to dwell on it.

His dark eyes widened after a moment, as if recognising her name. Rey swallowed. Deeply. _Oh no_ , she thought.

“Wait, _the_ Rey?” the young pilot asked, sparing a swift glance down at his astromech, who whistled in response.

 _‘The’ Rey?_ she pondered, _what on earth was he talking about?_

“ _Buddy!_ Why didn’t you say?” Poe exclaimed, mock-berating the little BB unit. “If I knew I was going to meet the woman who kept you safe, who rescued Finn _and_ bested Kylo Ren…”

If it was possible for Rey to know if she had turned _even redder_ , she would have guessed she had. It suddenly seemed to grow very hot.

As if sensing her embarrassment, the pilot changed tack.

“I’m sorry,” he apologised with an earnest, crooked smile, hand running through his hair, “it’s not every day you get to meet the person who beat Kylo Ren in a lightsaber duel on an exploding star base…” he trailed off with a laugh.

 _It’s endearing, that little gesture,_ Rey thought, as she looked at him. Like the child-like innocence in Finn’s eyes when she had first met him.

“Dameron! We’re moving out!” shouted Leia, breaking the awkward silence that had spread between the pilot and the former scavenger.

“I guess we’d better follow them, guys,” Poe said, jerking his head in the direction of the small congregation starting to depart uphill towards the ring of stone structures.

Poe had spent much of the rest of the day making repeat trips up and down with Chewbacca and a few of the other members of the small band of visitors, to unload supplies, in the remaining daylight following their arrival. It seemed that they would be staying for a few days. He had taken up first watch, despite Luke’s assurances that that would not be necessary; after setting up a shift pattern between himself and the small Resistance security detail who had accompanied the General.

Rey wondered if he had been doing so - in part - to avoid having a repeat of the uncomfortable nature of their earlier conversation. Her heart was lifted though, when he returned at the end of his shift and joined them at their evening meal. She hoped he didn’t notice how often she stole glances at them, but his face was far more pleasing to look at than anything she’d seen in the months she’d been here. _Well, at least as much as the sea,_ she thought to herself.

Finishing their meal, the amassed personnel had broken off into smaller groups for loose, relaxed chat. Leia and Luke had retired to Luke’s chambers after the meal, which Rey had to admit was _far_ more appetising than the near-constant stew and fried fish she had grown accustomed to during her stay on Ahch-To. The rest of the grouping were beginning to slowly move off into the vacant chambers, to set up cots and other items necessary for the duration of their visit. Poe too, had eventually bid her a good night.

So, she had been meditating since returning to her own quarters, in an effort to calm herself following her earlier flustered state. Satisfied that she had done what she could to remedy the situation, she changed out of her day’s clothing, tossing them along with her arm wrappings into the basket for her washing. Quickly pulling on a loose, parchment-coloured wrap-style top and knee-length trousers, she got herself into bed and extinguished her lamp.

She lay on her side, trying to process the events of the day, glad to have their guests. Regardless of what Poe probably thought of her, she had been glad to hear that Finn was healing well. Even if he hadn’t woken up yet. Her mind drifted, returning to Leia and how genuinely pleased she seemed to see Luke and somewhat surprisingly, Rey.

Not that Rey didn’t believe what she had told her.

Rey had just always had a hard time _actually_ taking people at their word - given her experience with Unkar Plutt and the other residents of her former home world. Leia’s embrace and words however, along with having spent time with Chewie again, made her feel a form of contentment that she hadn’t felt in a _very_ long time.

Rolling over, she lay there in the quiet night for a while longer, before felt her eyes slip shut.

 

* * *

 

 

Rey didn’t know how much time had passed as she had drifted in the haze of sleep, but she was no longer herself, once more.

She was sitting cross-legged in a field of pale flowers, a small lake glistening in the distance. The sun was high in the sky, warming her bare arms and face. She could feel her loose hair flowing in the soft breeze.

“ _Tutor Karas_ , may… may I join you?” a nervous tone affected the young man’s voice which sounded behind her. _A deep voice, but so familiar…_ Rey noted.

Opening her eyes in the bright light, she squinted, bringing her hand up to relieve the glare.

“Ben?” A musical-sounding voice that wasn’t really Rey’s, questioned.

“Yes…” came the shy response. He blushed bashfully as she half-turned around, twisting her torso to face him, supporting herself with her arm.

Sensing his trepidation as he awaited her response, she gestured for him to come and sit by her amongst the flowers.

“How did you know I was up here?” the woman asked, regarding him out of the corner of her right eye.

“I… I passed Master Luke and Tutor Gan Reval and Tutor Sinté at the gate to the compound… they said I might find you here.” He answered, earnestly.

“And find me you did,” the maiden laughed softly, “…was there something that you needed, or are you happy to join me in meditation?”

“I… wanted to apologise. For my outburst when you dismissed me from class. I… was wrong, and I let my frustration get the better of me,” he groaned, his head now in his hands, “I should trust your judgement when you tell me I am not ready to face my Trial of Spirit yet,” he finished with an audible sigh, face hidden by his thick, charcoal, wavy hair.

“Ben…” she exhaled, compassion bleeding into her tone. Her bright, forest-green eyes were fixed on him as he slowly raised his head to look at her.

He had been in awe of her when they had been younger, and it was little different now.

She was always so composed and collected. _An exemplary Jedi_ , he thought. She had always had so much time for him, more so than the other tutors. _Perhaps she pities me?_ he wondered, bitterly.

She reached for his hand, unexpectedly, covering it with her own as she squeezed it gently. He _felt_ her warmth. Her Light. _It was wonderful._

“You _will_ be ready, Ben. We just have to work on whatever is causing this… _conflict_ , within you”, she smiled, waving her hand in front of him as she spoke, the corners of her lips tugging upwards slightly.

Releasing his hand gently, she turned to look out at the field once more.

Feeling the absence of her touch, he settled into a similar seated position, ready to meditate together in silence.

She spoke once more, just before she returned to her own meditation, “The rain will not fall before it is ready to Ben, just as a flower will not bloom before its time.”

Disquiet fell over them for a few moments, beginning to deepen, each unsure how to respond to her comment.

“Are you comparing me to a _flower_ , Reina?” he snorted, deep hazel eyes narrowed in mischief, attempting to stop the rumbling laugh which nevertheless escaped him.

“Do you not see yourself as one?” she mocked, plucking a large light-cyan bloom out of the ground in front of her, twirling it absentmindedly between her slim fingers. Then, realising what she had said mere moments before, a light flush settled on her cheeks.

“Wouldn’t my _height_ make me more of a _tree_?” he sniggered, eyebrow raised in disbelief at her unexpected compliment.

“ _Well, if you so strongly disagree…_ ” she quickly retorted, leaning toward him on her right hand, hair cascading over her shoulder - exposing the pale skin there not hidden by her blue sleeveless Jedi robes - to the light.

“I didn’t say that-” he stammered, suddenly unsure of himself.

“Good,” she smirked, getting onto her knees and sending him backpedalling even more quickly. Supporting her weight with one hand on his broad shoulder, she used the other to slide the flower’s stem above his ear, catching it gently in his thick dark mane.

His breath caught in his throat at the sudden renewal of contact, fighting inwardly with himself to keep his gaze from drifting up to meet her forest green eyes.

“How _dare_ you…” he growled playfully, eyes narrowing once more, when she returned to sit at his side.

“Consider this part of your training, Padawan Solo,” she laughed.

That wonderful, hiccup-y laugh that he could never get enough of.

She returned to her cross-legged pose again, settling herself. A few minutes passed, and her breaths grew deep and even.

He took the opportunity to watch her for a moment, craning his neck slightly. She looked so serene. _So regal_. Her long lashes covered her piercing eyes. Her skin, pale and smooth like alabaster. Long, dark lustrous hair swayed as it caught occasionally in the light breeze across the field within which they sat. He wondered if she could sense the calming effect just being around her - outside of class - had on him. He wondered if she noticed how often he stole glances at her, like she had, him.

So, it came as a surprise to Rey when the sky above the field of flowers darkened dramatically, and the scene she was watching – living - seemed to shift.

When the disorientation passed, Rey realised she was herself once more, sitting in the sand of Jakku.

 _Night_ , she observed, suddenly feeling the chill air. A dying fire was in front of her. The cold biting at her skin, she held her hands out trying to warm them. She had done this, countless nights. _Was this a dream, or had she never really left Jakku?_ she wondered to herself.

She was puzzled momentarily, until she heard a sound behind her. _A sound like..._

 _No!_ She thought desperately.

She felt herself jump up at _his_ presence – suddenly able to sense him, attempting to prevent herself falling.

 _Anything but this,_ Rey pleaded to the universe.

Confusion coursing through her, she threw out her hand as she spun round, instinct taking over her actions. She would defend herself. _She had to try._

 

* * *

 

 

Kylo Ren woke suddenly, jerking up from his bed.

 _Why had she appeared?_ he thought.

 _This is getting out of hand,_ he then decided.

 _But… was it her, was it the Scavenger this time?_ he pondered, a mixture of anxiety and a thrill running through him.

His heart was still hammering within his chest. It _had_ to be _her_ this time. She had _looked_ at him.

_She had seen him._

Every other time he had encountered _her_ – well - _the past-her_ , he had been viewing what must have been her memories. Of her existence on that backwater scrap-world she had called home.

This time he had _felt_ himself being forced out of this – _vision_ \- like she had really channelled the Force to _push_ him.

Whatever this strange connection they now seemed to share was, it both _troubled_ and _excited_ him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've tried to write BB-8 partway between a dog and a toddler - hope y'all like it?
> 
> I've used a couple of tracks whilst writing this:-  
> 'The Scavenger'- John Williams (Full track; around the 1:30 mark Luke senses Leia)  
> 'Yoda and the younglings' - John Williams (up to 3:22 of the track) - From where Rey remembers Finn ("I’m Poe. Poe Dameron.” around the 1:17 mark).  
> 'Respite'- Clinton Shorter - Rey's reflection on the day.  
> 'A Hard Teacher' - Hans Zimmer - (Ben and Reina - up to 5:44)  
> 'A Reflection' - Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross (Kylo awakens and sits pondering into the night).
> 
> Sidenote – A fanfic I loved but was a limited series is 'Consumed' by AngeLhearteD – I really love the way the it’s written.
> 
> If you've enjoyed/are enjoying the story, please let me know! See you at the next chapter, I'll try and get it up in the next few days :D


	4. Gravity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo reflects on his side of the nightly visitations. 
> 
> Rey tries to understand from her own perspective.

He wandered the cool sand, treading that familiar path to the downed walker. Coming to a stop at the dune above it, he could see the embers of the Scavenger’s fire still glowing. Moving down the slope, he crossed towards the entrance hatch. _It was open._

It had never been open, in any of the other nightly visions – or whatever these were.

 _Memories? Is that what these are?_ He pondered silently, as he padded quietly down the sand.

He had yet to discern the answer, but he moved between being infuriated and intrigued by them.

Catching the dull glow from the open hatch, he hesitated for a moment at its threshold, indecision paralysing him. Shaking himself, he forced his feet to move, carrying him inwards. A lamp was lit in the corner. The Scavenger lay on her side, staring into _nothing_. She looked _much younger_ than he’d seen her - scrawny and dirty, with a small, rough blanket that was barely big enough to accommodate her wrapped around herself.

Tears streaked her face, her tiny hands clutching an orange doll tightly. As he moved closer he could see that it was homemade. He watched her for a moment, concern rushing in his geins at the fleeting, hollow feeling he felt in his chest. His eyes moved down to the doll and he recognised that the colours were meant to depict a Rebel pilot’s flight suit.

 _Really?_ He sneered to himself, lips turning downwards briefly in disgust.

But as he continued to stand there as she wept silently, he found himself growing increasingly uneasy, so he turned away from the small child and began to look around the rest of the space.

It was strewn with material of varying descriptions.

He could see a few discarded meal packets littering a work surface, a measly collection of trinkets and what he could only guess were her few belongings, dotted throughout. As his eyes continued to rove, he spotted a wilting flower on a makeshift work bench, ship parts which she appeared to have been polishing up, dozens of scraps of fabric and an aged Rebellion-era pilot’s helmet. Lifting the battered headgear and turning it over in his hands, the irony didn’t escape him. How a Rebel pilot’s helmet had survived – intact – and now lay within a gutted AT-AT, occupied by a feral child.

 _How quaint_ … he thought derisively.

Gently setting it down, he continued his investigation and walked towards the edge of the space - an ephemeral glint catching his eye in the dim amber glow of the solitary lamp.

 _Dozens upon dozens_ of tiny vertical scratches lined one of the panels of the walker’s inner hull.

As his gaze travelled to the panel next to it, he saw more, and more on the one next to that.

It looked like the markings a prisoner would make - to track time in a place where it could be easily lost.

 _Is that what she was... a prisoner here?_ he wondered quietly, resting against the workbench he came to a stop at.

The odd, hollow feeling below his ribs returned and compelled him to regard her tiny form, shivering below the covers, tucked into the far corner from where he was leaning.

As he watched her, he could now sense the crushing sadness – tinged with loneliness – that leaked out from her into the space between them, like a thick, dark oil. It pulled at something in his chest, something he had told himself he had put an end to.

 _How long had she waited here?_ he asked himself, _how long had she lain there, weeping every night for whoever had abandoned her here?_

The discomfort continued and he felt he could no longer intrude within her dusty sanctum.

If Kylo ever decided to be honest with himself, he would confess that his curiosity about her had been sparked the moment they had crossed paths - when she had tried to fire her blaster blindly at him - fire in her eyes.

 _She came from nothing,_ he told himself once again, _why would the Force choose her, of all people, to channel itself so strongly through?_

It did not matter.

The Supreme Leader had decided he wanted her brought in. Once Ren had sputtered out his pleading request to teach her, in a feeble attempt to appease his Dark Master, he had _felt_ it. Something dropped within his stomach upon receiving the order. But bring her in Kylo would.

An evil smirk played upon his lips. Oh, he would _enjoy_ this. A chance to get _even_.

Lifting himself from his resting position, Kylo pulled his black cloak tighter around himself as he headed back out into the chill of the night. As he stepped out of the hatch, he caught sight of a figure crouched by the remains of the fire - half illuminated in the faint light spilling out from the hulk behind him.

 _Scavenger!_ he flared internally, eyes narrowing.

 _Was this another vision?_ he deliberated. She obviously hadn’t sensed the brief, unsettled pulse he released when he had spotted her. _Well of course she hadn’t_ , he inwardly admonished himself, _she’s not really here..._

Ren halted, choosing to watch her from hiding instead. She was holding her hands above the smouldering charcoal.

 _Trying to keep warm? Good luck with that_ , he thought darkly, unable to help the amused snort which broke through.

Her head snapped around, searching for the source of the noise, as she jumped back. Her arms flailed, to try and prevent herself from falling. Righting herself, she slowly turned to face him.

 _What in the-?_ he asked himself, unable to believe what he had just seen.

Her arm shot out defensively, in a reflex he knew all too well.

Before Kylo even had time to fully register what was happening, he had been flung unceremoniously from his feet, soaring backwards through the air. 

                                                                                          

* * *

 

Rey nearly fell out of her bed, her breathing heavy, cold sweat sticking her loose brown hair to her cool skin.

It was still night outside, as far as she could tell.

Sitting at the edge of her cot, she slowly tried to bring her breathing back under control, drawing air in and out at lessening speed as she brought her rapid heart rate back under control. She muttered agitatedly to herself. Deciding to walk in the quiet of the night to try to take her mind off things, she swung her legs off the bed.

Rising, she crossed the cold stone floor, pulled on her worn brown leather boots and wrapped her thick waxed cloak about her shoulders. Stepping outside, she pulled the timber door shut slowly - in an effort not to disturb anyone. Heading towards the coastal path, she pulled her cloak tighter, to try and close up any gaps letting in the cold night air.

The only sound she could hear was the distant crashing of the waves below.

Her feet carried her on the familiar route she would tread any time she awoke and was unable to settle. Looking up at the stars above, she felt herself beginning to relax slightly. It wasn’t often that she saw them here - they were usually obscured by the thick layers of cloud common to Ahch-To.

Rey chuckled softly, feeling the dew on the mossy path against her bare calves. It was a simple pleasure really, but one she had only found since her arrival here. She decided to stop further up the cliffs, at a collapsed stone stack, and sat down on it. She leaned back, so she could get a better view of the heavens above, peace settling over her for a time.

It wasn’t long however, before _he_ intruded her thoughts once again, forcing her head into her hands. _Where had he come from?_ She asked no one in particular, _…and why had she ended up on Jakku, when she had been sitting in that sun-drenched field?_

 _It all seems so bizarre - but then - none of this is exactly ‘normal’, is it?_ Rey thought. She was unsettled by how _different_ the young man who spoke to her in her dreams seemed.

_So normal…_

Her mind wandered to the young woman whose body she seemed to inhabit within these dreams. _Reina,_ she recalled, as her eyes moved to the vast sea, Rey’s thoughts darkening soon after.

 _They had been so close,_ Rey noted _,_ _so at ease with each other… and he had just cut her down like that. As_ _if she was nothing._

A heaviness grew in Rey’s chest.

 _Had she been nothing to him?_ She wondered, _it hadn’t seemed that way…_ Rey felt herself flushing when she remembered how he had looked at her. _Not me_ , she realised, but Rey knew that she herself _had_  felt it.

Rey felt increasingly uncomfortable. Like she had encroached on some private moment between the two of them.

 _Why has the Force decides to show me these images, memories? Whatever in kriff they are..._ Rey grumbled to herself. She hoped - _genuinely hoped_ \- that the old man would find the answer to this soon. _She needed him to._ She was _exhausted_ from the bombardment of visions - of the darkness of Kylo Ren and the fleeting glimpses of the man he had been before…

Light was beginning to grow on the horizon.

 _Dawn,_ she smiled, _thank goodness_...

She heard a hut door shutting in the distance, catching sight of a small figure descending to the cliffs where the X-Wing and Falcon stood. Wanting to find out who it was, she rose to her feet, pacing back towards the path again.

After her journey back to the camp, she could smell cooking from the main space, floating to her from within. Delicious as it seemed, she continued down the worn stone steps, carved into the cliff face. Reaching the last step - at the foot of the cliff where the two ships sat - she could make out Poe. He lay on his back beneath his X-Wing, working on something, his diminutive BB unit at his feet.

He was wearing a black vest and rolled down cover-all’s. As Rey wandered closer she could see his taut, muscled arms, tightening something to the undercarriage as he occasionally responded to something BB-8 had intoned.

“I know buddy…”, he said – his warm, deep voice reaching her ears, “I think I’ve been rude too…”

 _Rude?_ She wondered.

“I should’ve made more of an effort to talk to her, after everything she’s done”, he continued, “but I had to help unload and-”

A whistle came in response from the small droid.

“What? I am not a liar!” Poe laughed.

A rapid series of whirrs and spluttering beeps returned in riposte.

Deciding she should probably announce her presence - before he said anything more - Rey decided to call out.

“Is there anything I can help with?” she asked loudly.

Jerking his head up quickly – startled - Poe smacked his head off the open cover to the access panel hanging in front of him.

“ _Damn it!_ ” he yelped, hand flying to where he had hit his head.

A sharp whistle escaped the round droid.

“You want _me_ to watch my language? _Really?_ ” he yelled back - rubbing his forehead - a vivid crimson scrape above his right eyebrow. “Well… I suppose there is _a lady_ present”, he mumbled, a joking tone returning to his voice.

“I didn’t mean to disturb you…” Rey said in a small voice, “I just thought I could _help_.”

“Hey… That wasn’t directed at you… I just-” Poe floundered, caught off guard by the effect his outburst had had, “You gave me a fright is all.”

Rey’s expression brightened marginally at his earnestness.

“You want to help?” he smiled, eyes conveying his question, “Can you grab my med-kit out of the cockpit, first?” he asked. A crooked smile spread across his face when she happily nodded and he began to haul himself out from below the ship.

“ _Of course_ ,” Rey laughed. She jumped up on to the nose of the craft, stepping towards the open cockpit. It was much smaller than she had imagined, despite this model being larger than the burnt-out shells she had come across in the desert as a child.

 _Finally_ locating the kit, she reached in to grab it, before sliding herself down backwards to land in a crouch on her feet. As she straightened – turning - she glimpsed Poe watching her before he quickly glanced away again, caught.

“Put it down over there, I need to grab some water to clean this before we dress it,” he stated, gesturing toward a couple of crates, sitting between the ships. Pacing off to another set of crates, she watched his retreating form, before she started to unpack the kit. He returned with a small metal canister, tipping its open end over his marred forehead, until a growing trickle poured out.

Rey caught herself staring as some of the water and the crimson staining him overflowed down onto his autumn skin, still glistening from his recent exertion. She noted that his neck had a small metal chain with a hammered silver metal ring around it. Rey couldn’t help her eyes but follow the rivulets still trickling down the exposed part of his chest as it beaded with water.

Trying to control her heated reaction, she whipped her head back to the previous object of her concern - the med-kit - when Poe’s eyes caught hers as he wiped himself off with a towel.

“We’ve got bacta strips, some sealed bandages, a small case of equipment and a dermaseal spray,” she said hurriedly - a flustered edge to her voice – as she tried to focus solely on the return to the task at hand.

“Can you hand me the spray?” Poe asked, reaching his hand out, as he tried to keep his head elevated to slow the bleeding.

“Here,” she answered, handing him the open can. She observed as he used his index finger as a rough guide for the spray, pressing down firmly on the valve until a steady stream emitted. Handing her back the can, now that the wound was sealed, he brought his chiselled chin back down.

“Can you give me a hand with _those?_ ” he grinned absentmindedly, as his eyes ran over her angular features, pointing at the bacta strips. Then he took in what she was wearing, which peeked out from beneath the edge of her cloak.

Returning his smile in kind, Rey moved to stand in front of him.

She then noticed Poe looking at her strangely, his eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

“You make a habit of repairing ships in your sleepwear?” he asked - eyebrow raised in question -  his dark eyes lingered downwards, before settling on hers.

Rey felt herself flush violently, only now remembering she was still in her sleep clothes from the night before.

Shoving the bacta strips at the tall pilot, she moved to turn on her heel, feeling his hand close around her wrist softly as she tried to hurriedly leave. She felt him gently turn her back towards him.

“Hey… I’m sorry,” he murmured softly, before continuing, “I shouldn’t have said that…” he murmured, his free hand scratching the back of his neck. Rey’s resolve to put as much distance as possible between them – and her embarrassment - melted a bit at that.

“ _Please_ , at least help me finish up?” Poe continued, slowly placing the strips back into her hand, before letting her wrist go. They stood there for what seemed like an age, before the small droid rolled in between them, shocking its master in the leg.

Poe yelped at the sensation, ready to berate his little companion, but it died on his lips when he heard Rey giggle.

It was a beautiful, infectious sound which he found himself soon joining with a snigger of his own.

“I suppose I was being _rude_ again, little guy?” he posited as he looked at his droid, head nodding towards the young woman in front of him. As much as Poe didn’t want to admit it, he was beginning to like his time here. _Well, except for the electric shock._ He hadn’t originally wanted to come, only agreeing to the mission because he wanted to personally head up Leia’s security detail, finally convincing her that she did indeed _need_ one when going to visit her brother.

The small detachment of Resistance fighters had left their cruiser in orbit, keeping it suspended between the moon and the planet - out of sight - reducing the chance of it being picked up by any long-range scans. Since Starkiller, Poe hadn’t wanted to let the General out of his sight.

“Well, I think you’d better sit down,” Rey stated, pointing at the crates behind them. As Poe settled onto one, Rey pocketed the small case of equipment and brought it with her. Opening the bacta strip pack, she came to a rest in front of him, slender fingers reaching for his chin to tilt his face up towards her. She could feel the beginnings of a rough stubble beneath her fingertips before she moved to begin applying the strips across his wound. Trying her best to focus on treating him, she chose to ignore the fact that he was looking at her with those damned caff-coloured eyes again. Her blush returned, far stronger than before.

“I’m sorry - am I putting you off?” he asked, concern - alongside a playfulness - eminent in his voice, his thick eyebrows creasing slightly in a frown.

“I’d rather you looked _anywhere_ but at me!” she blurted out in response, unable to stop herself.

“That’s kind of _hard_ , don’t you think?” Poe smirked up at her through his lashes, mischief playing on his features.

“ _Is it?_ ” she answered, desperately wishing she could ignore the playful comment. Summoning all the willpower she could to concentrate, she pulled out the small case, opening it and removing the syringe to load it with antibiotics.

“You, uh, done much field dressing?” he enquired, sensing Rey was closing herself off again. He decided that he wanted to prolong this interaction for as long as possible, without really understanding why. It was unusual, but something about the way she was reacting to him was intriguing. Plus, he loved any opportunity to wind someone up. It was in his nature.

“I had to learn - growing up fending for myself on Jakku,” she began, with an almost distant note to her voice, “if you _didn’t_ learn to do something like take care of yourself - you were done,” Rey answered matter-of-factly, continuing to prep the syringe.

Her pragmatism disarmed him. Poe supposed it shouldn’t have.

 _Spending your formative years on a world like that_ … he didn’t want to think about it. So, he continued to watch her with interest instead. He had recognised - now that he had gotten another, better look at her - that her face was weathered, despite her youthful appearance.

Although, as he ‘looked anywhere but at her’, he also observed that she was skinny, with a lean build.

 _Probably from never knowing when her next meal was going to come_ , he thought sadly. He’d seen how quickly she had eaten the previous day, clearing her plate of all evidence it had ever seen food.

Poe was dumped back to reality by a sharp jolt in his right arm.

“You could have warned me…” he groaned dramatically, his gaze returning to her face. He noticed her eyes then - they were a brilliant hazel-green with an almost feline shape, flecks of amber visible in them as they caught the early morning light. She was locked in concentration as she emptied the syringe into his arm. Freckles dusted her features, despite the slight tan she had. _She’s pretty - but not in a contrived way_ , he decided.

“Good job!” he offered, his crooked smile re-forming, causing her to tinge rosily once more.

Rey snatched her hand back, wiping the syringe off with an antiseptic wipe. She chose to busy herself with replacing everything back into the med-kit – in an effort to combat her uncharacteristic bout of swooning.

Poe rose, finding BB-8’s optic flicking between the two of them. Puzzled, Poe moved back towards his fighter, readying himself to finish up his work below it.

“So,” she piped up from behind – once she had regained her composure, “anything I can help with?”

“Alright,” Poe smiled, crawling below the ship once more, “but are you sure you want to get close to this?” he joked, head and shoulders briefly popping back out as he sniffed himself theatrically.

“I haven’t showered yet,” he continued, when she met his joke with a bemused expression.

“I noticed,” she laughed – as her deadpan dissolved entirely, causing a frown to suddenly darken his handsome features.

 _Oh, so she does have a sense of humour,_ he thought, _and a sharp one at that_. 

                                                                                         

* * *

 

Rey and Poe had returned, once he had managed to reconnect a loose coupling that he acknowledged begrudgingly to BB-8 that they had been _right_ to be concerned about, which earned a happy chirrup-like beep from the astromech. They’d parted at the main structure: Poe going to ‘get the wash everybody seemed to think he needed’, with his small companion trundling along behind him.

When Rey arrived into the main stone structure, she found Leia and Luke finishing their morning meals, both looking exhausted. She guessed that they would have had a lot to catch up on _, what with his nephew having turned full-Sith and murdered his father,_ she grumbled inwardly. Admonishing herself for her mental outburst, she collected her own food, before going to join them.

“So nice of you to finally join us, Rey,” came Leia’s regal voice, a playful twinkle in her eyes.

“We were _just_ talking about _you…_ ” continued Luke, exchanging a look with his twin that caused Rey nothing but worry.

 _Oh dear_ , Rey thought inwardly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this has spammed anyone's updates/notifications, but the website has been a butt to me since the downtime on the 7th and it won't let me upload everything at once...
> 
> Not much has changed in this chapter from what I originally wrote, apart from a few minor tweaks, as I was pretty happy with it.
> 
> Ah - gotta love BB-8, they're like a perfect mix of annoying younger sibling and wingman here!
> 
> FYI - I've aged Rey up to 21/22, Kylo down to 25/26 and Poe to 27(ish) from what's canon.
> 
> As before - if anyone's reading this story and enjoying it - please let me know :)
> 
> *Update - a big thank you to everyone who has left kudos and subs so far - it means a lot :). See you at the next chapter!*


	5. Spark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Skywalker Twins discuss the matter at hand. 
> 
> Our two protagonists meet in the snow.

Luke and Leia had stayed awake for hours after retiring to Luke’s chamber, debating and examining what Rey had described to Luke the night by the fire.

“It’s _most_ unsettling…” he muttered, pacing back in forth in front of the hearth in his simple, austere living space – his arms loosely folded behind his back and his robes trailing behind him.

“Have you been able to commune with Master Yoda or Obi-Wan, about this?” his more forthright twin had prompted – sipping her tea – watching him intently as she did, “what about father?”

“No,” he responded, an annoyed tone entering his voice, “no, I haven’t. Which is even _stranger…_ ”

Sighing, she swivelled around to face him, setting the small stone cup down elegantly.

“Maybe this is something they’re confident you can figure out on your own?” she offered, cheerfully shrugging her shoulders – her hazel eyes focused on the dancing flames in the small fire, the wrap that had been pinned around her shoulders now wrapped around her like a blanket.

“I don’t know about that Leia,” Luke began, “it’s been harder for me than normal to commune with them, ever since she got here” he answered, his frustration plain on his face. “It’s like her very presence disrupts things somehow…” he trailed off, resuming his pacing.

“Disrupts things _how?_ ” Leia cut in, concern bleeding into her speech.

“I’m not sure, but her raw connection to the Force is-” he continued, pausing as he weighed what he was about to say.

Wandering back to his seat, he discarded the contents of his own cup and poured himself a refill of the steaming brew in the kettle next to his twin – his earlier cup having long since gone cold.

“ _She’s seen it, Leia_ ” he announced suddenly, not even bothering to look up, “…all of it”.

A quiet gasp from his sibling prompted his pale blue eyes to rise from the swirling clouds within his cup. Shock flashed across his twin’s distinguished features – as the meaning of the words registered - before she quickly composed herself.

“She saw Ben-” Leia whispered, “-what happened that night?”

A strange expression crossed her visage - as if she was considering something carefully. Quickly trying to stow it away within herself, Luke had already sensed it.

“Don’t _do_ that. You know this is two-way,” he spoke, gesturing between them, his tone curt.

“ _Yes_ , but unlike you, brother - I still have hope,” she shot back.

“Hope isn’t always enough…” he breathed solemnly.

Luke turned back towards the fire, choosing to regard it instead of attempting to deal with the indignant expression on his sister’s face. It was clear in this light, how the years had worn on him: his eyes were sunken, his shoulders hunched and curled in on himself and his skin much paler than Leia remembered her desert-raised brother ever having.

“ _Sometimes hope is all we have_ ,” Leia returned, her small hand reaching out for him, passion burned in her voice as she gripped his shoulder.

Time had been far kinder to Luke’s twin. She too was showing the signs of her age, but they appeared more natural and far less severe. She was somewhat heavier in build than he had known her in his youth, but she still carried herself with the grace and beauty that she always had. Her clothing was still finely tailored, and her manicured appearance was still evident. Appearance for a political leader - as she so often noted - was half the battle. A strong instinct for which, Leia had unconsciously inherited from their mother.

Humming quietly in answer, Luke heard her rise. Coming to a stop in front of him, she met his eyes with a stern look.

“You dishonour _his_ memory by wallowing in self-pity, Luke,” she seethed, “you dishonour the memory of them _all,_ ” she continued, her eyes like slits as she grew in anger at her brother’s hopeless attitude.

Guilt blossomed in Luke’s chest, spreading like awful vines throughout his being. He moved away, attempting to throw up mental barriers to block his sister out. Her open display of emotion had affected him more than he dared admit.

“Don’t you _dare!_ ” she raged, tearing their bond open once more, “Don’t you _dare_ try to shut me out again!”

Realising that this was a fight he would not win tonight, Luke tried to leave, waving his hand to open the door to the chamber, from across the room. Leia briskly stormed around him, blocking his path before he could make his exit. The door rattled violently in its hinges as she slammed it shut.

Piercing gaze meeting her brother’s forlorn one, Leia continued her impassioned speech.

“ _He_ never gave up on Ben - not once!” she growled, finger jabbing into his chest. Tears pooled in her eyes, forcing Luke to meet them again.

“He never failed him, Luke - and neither did you,” she wept, “-I did.”

At this, he sensed Leia’s fiery, sparking aura receding into a cool shimmer. She had always been the quicker to anger of the two twins - one of the few similarities she shared with their father.

Unsure of what to say to comfort her, Luke instead pulled her into a tender embrace, feeling her still in his arms.

“ _I should never have sent him away…_ ” she rasped, emotion still thick in her throat.

“None of us could have foreseen it, Leia,” her brother answered, in a low, gentle tone, “but I should have done more when concerns were brought to me,” he continued, “Rey has reminded me of that, in a way.”

“Maybe this is the will of the Force,” she responded quietly, make-up staining her face.

“Perhaps… but I don’t intend to fail her,” he declared – his renewed resolve clear. Letting go of his sister, he stepped back from her slightly, reaching below to softly clasp her hands in his. “I don’t intend to fail _you_ ,” Luke stated.

“We can’t afford to-,” Leia smiled affectionately up at her twin, “-or we might lose them _both._ ”

 

* * *

 

Rey’s eyes darted frantically between the Skywalker twins - panic starting to set in - jolting out towards them both in a shivering manner.

“Calm yourself, Rey,” Luke exclaimed, hand raised as if to assuage her worries.

“You’re not in any trouble dear,” added Leia - a maternal smile on her face.

Relief then washed over Rey - the tension dissipating from her so quickly that she dropped her plate.

Getting up to help her, Leia quickly shushed the girl as they both scraped up the remains of her breakfast. Leia wandered outside and cleared it into the composting bin, whilst Luke scrambled out of his seat to and get Rey a fresh plate.

“You could have _phrased_ it better…” Rey grumbled, disappointed at having wasted food.

Sensing her agitation, like a jumbled knot, Luke ushered her over to her seat and set down the warm replacement meal in front of her.

Re-joining them and sitting down elegantly adjacent her brother, Leia turned her focus back to Rey as the young woman picked at her food – her appetite not quite having returned yet.

“I’m sorry if that startled you,” she soothed, “...but my brother here thought it best to fill me in on the nightly ‘issues’ you’ve been having…” she smiled - but it faded by the time it reached her eyes. Instead, she looked concerned for the girl who sat before her.

 _Issues?_ Rey scoffed, inwardly.

“I- I’m not sure I understand,” the young woman began, defensiveness beginning to creep into her voice.

“Luke has agreed to start your training-,” Leia cut across, steering the conversation away from anything that would further provoke Rey, for the time being.

Rey blinked in near-disbelief. _After months of wearing him down, all it took was for a visit from his sister to talk some sense into the stubborn old git,_ she thought, amusedly.

“ _You have?_ ” Rey asked, careful to moderate the excitement in her voice, until she heard the words confirmed out loud by him.

“I have,” he smiled back at her, the man standing in front of her looking less aged and haggard than he had been.

Leia’s earlier rebuke had been a hard truth for Luke to hear, but one that he needed to. He had been wasting this girl’s potential, squandering it by not giving her the guidance she would need for one gifted with such a natural connection to the Force. All because he was _haunted_. Haunted by the ghost of a young boy, long dead. By that terrible night. By the maddening silence, as all the fevered, frightened voices were extinguished one by one. By the lifeless body of his most-beloved Knight, lying bloodied at the foot of the charred Force tree. Her once bright eyes, holding Light no more.

Luke shivered at the memory.

Rey had wondered if it was sorrow and guilt that had kept him so secluded, exiled from the rest of the Galaxy, for so long.

“We thought it was about time that he came out of hiding,” Leia softly smiled, motherly kindness in her tone, “for his own good and for _yours_ ,” she entreated.

The words seemed to resonate with within Luke, as had Leia’s harsh truths of the previous night. Luke’s shoulders dropped slightly, “I’ve been gone from the world a long time, Leia,” he admitted.

“It doesn’t matter how long this path you’ve been walking is, Luke, you’ve walked it alone _long enough_ ,” his sister sighed, laughing slightly as she nodded in Rey’s direction.

Watching their reconciliation, Rey was reminded of her own family, who conversely, had discarded her quicker than the time it took to exchange a few credits at a bar. She longed deeply to feel that familial closeness for herself one day. She thought she’d been beginning to connect with Luke, after all this time and couldn’t fight back the small surge of excitement she felt now that finally she would begin her training. She beamed at the siblings, almost glowing in happiness and they soon found themselves matching her smile with their own.

A major shift had occurred within Luke - as if a great fog had been lifted. He seemed to be standing taller – his shoulders squared and no longer hunched, a spark of life and vibrancy had returned to his eyes, which had been distant for so long. He was silent for a moment, before he felt he could speak.

“Your training begins in earnest, from today, _Padawan,_ ” he proclaimed, bowing to Rey, his voice now holding a driven edge that Rey had not heard from him before.

                                                                                   

* * *

 

 

Rey and her new Master had changed into clothing more suitable training and met at her normal spot, leaving Leia and the visiting Resistance entourage to their own devices.

“Go and warm yourself up first,” said Luke, waving her off as he discarded his sandstone coloured cloak, beginning to stretch out his arms.

“But-” began the newly-anointed Padawan.

“No 'buts', kid,” he answered, cutting her off, “-don’t want you hurting yourself before we even get to the hard stuff…” a playful tone to his cadence.

“ _Fine…_ ” she huffed and began to stretch herself out. Once she felt she had gotten herself as prepared as she could and had sufficiently worked out the knots in her muscles from the previous day, she sauntered back over to her waiting teacher.

“I _do_ appreciate your enthusiasm, though,” Luke noted, smiling widely, “we’ll get that knocked out of you soon enough!” he chuckled.

“What are we going to begin with?” asked Rey, raring to go.

“Well, I thought we could check how well you can sense your surroundings using the Force,” offered Luke, his expression inviting her to agree or suggest something else.

“Well…” began the young woman, “that’s something I’m not even sure I can do…”

“Well, you won’t know if you don’t try,” he answered, “sit down and close your eyes,” he commanded.

Rey did as she was bade and sank down into a cross-legged position, looking up at him.

“ _Now what?_ ” she asked, an incredulous expression on her face. Part of her thought he would be showing her something a bit more – well – _interesting_.

“Patience, Rey,” he chuckled softly, “I’d like you to close your eyes, first.”

“Right, _now what?_ ” she wondered, her eyes firmly shut, a slight frown from the effort distorting her otherwise neutral expression.

“Now, I want you to reach out – try to see if you can _feel_ where I am,” he asked her.

“Right,” murmured Rey, her eyebrows knitted together in concentration.

“ _Anything?_ ” Luke asked her, an evaluating look in his eyes as he watched his student.

“I’m not sure,” Rey began, “there’s a gentle tugging – like it’s in my chest,”

“Good,” he responded.

She could tell he was moving from the position of his voice. He had started off in front of her and now he was somewhere behind her.

“Ah-ah,” he laughed, noticing her head turning slightly in his direction any time he spoke, “don’t focus on my voice. Try to root yourself to the ground – feel energy flowing through you and down into the earth with each breath.”

“Is this really _necessary?_ ” Rey asked, trying to hide her growing disappointment that they weren’t starting off with something more _practical_ – like Lightsaber training.

“Believe it or not, _yes,_ ” Luke laughed – his single cracked laugh – obviously amused by her impatience. He remembered once being where she was – eager and foolhardy in his desire to learn the ways of the Force.

“I’m not feeling anything,” she grumbled dejectedly, her shoulder slumping forwards a bit.

“Stop talking then!” he laughed again, “Concentrate on the movement through you as you breathe and then try to follow it – don’t think too much about where right now, we can work on that after you get the hang of this.”

“Okay,” she murmured and then focused on the steady rise and fall of her chest, the air drawn in through her nose and gently pushed out through her mouth. In and out. In... and out... She concentrated on that and on this imaginary ‘flow’ Luke spoke of until she felt the same familiar feeling she had when she’d thrown her hand out in her dream the night before. When she’d escaped from the interrogation room so long ago. Except _this time,_ she called it to her – consciously. Despite how hard she tried to hold onto it, her excitement at achieving what he’d asked her to, caused her to lose it and she hissed audibly.

“ _Having trouble?_ ” asked Luke, still slowly circling round her, monitoring.

“I had it and then it went,” she muttered, frowning in annoyance.

“Okay, that’s still good progress,” he praised her, “try again,” he said encouragingly.

So, she did - and failed - again.

“I don’t understand…” she grumbled, upon losing the sensation once more.

“You’ve got a natural connection to the Force, Rey - that much is clear. You just need practice in _using_ that connection,” he smiled, “try again.”

Again, and again, Rey tried and failed to keep sensing this flow her Master kept referring to.

“Keep going, you’ll get there,” Luke grinned.

This time, Rey decided she would slow herself down. In and out. In and out.

 _She felt it._ The tugging in her chest, but it was _stronger_ this time. This time it didn’t go, and she didn’t fight to keep hold of it. She didn’t chase it. It just _was_. Confident that it wasn’t going to disappear, Rey wondered what to do, so she imagined the tugging in her chest led her to something at the end of it.

She thought she felt a soft tug back. So, she concentrated and tried to feel what it was. Its presence was warm and nearby. _Very nearby_. Calm and - she thought - happy.

Her eyes snapped open and flew to Luke.

“I- I _felt_ something,” she stammered, elation in her voice.

“Good,” he laughed, “You _finally_ found me!”

Rey grinned brightly up at him, pleased that she’d managed to succeed, and Luke found himself joining in.

“Show me more!” Rey exclaimed, almost child-like in her enthusiasm, her eyes wide in wonder.

Luke began to go through the basic principles with her, for honing her skills in sensing with the Force and took the rest of the afternoon to correct her where she was still failing, to praise her for every small bit of progress she made and to encourage her when she grew frustrated. He had _missed_ this. He had cut himself off for so long from everyone – from everything, that he had forgotten the simple _joy_ he had felt from being a teacher.

Stopping her afternoon stroll at the bottom of the slope down to the training field, Leia couldn’t help the small upward twitch of her lips as she watched them train together.

 _He’s home_ , she thought as she watched them continue to train.

Coming up on her left, Chewbacca let out a small cry, cocking his head slightly as he too turned to watch the new Padawan and her Master. The two eventually departed and the student and teacher had continued training until sunset, only then breaking off and Rey deciding she would turn in for the night.

                                                                                       

* * *

 

 

Kylo realised that was standing in the snow again, in that dying forest.

 _Starkiller… another dream?_ he ponders to himself.

The traitor lies in the snow in the distance.

He glances down. His lightsaber hisses in his hand, gripped tightly. He spots her, barely visible in the dying light.

The Scavenger is watching him - her features illuminated by her blue blade - feet firmly planted into an unconventional stance.

Kylo takes a step forward, watching her take a step back, readying her saber.

 _That's new_ , he notes, wondering if this is indeed another dream, or something else.

He reaches a gloved hand to his face. The stinging sensation which meets him as he brushes it over where _she_ had left _her mark_ on him causes his mood to darken. Rage flashes through him at the memory of the girl slashing his face, as he lay defeated. Of the punishment which Snoke had wrought on him in the aftermath. Pain at the memory of it, lances through him momentarily.

Crimson blade crackling, Kylo drags it upward through the snow, watching her eyes dart down before they flash back up to his snarling face.

 _Fear?_ he observes. 

 _Good,_ he growls inwardly, _she will learn that this scar was a mistake!_

Lunging forward, his blade is met with hers - defiant eyes locking with his as she tries desperately to brace her arms against the power behind his swing. The raw strength from it, as Ren’s frame towers over hers, presses her back.

She is fierce though, he notes, as she breaks their lock by kicking out and knocking him back, dropping down and sliding away. She flourishes her saber, returning to a defensive pose. _It is crude_ , he evaluates, _but effective_.

Smiling evilly, his eyes seem to glow red from the reflection of his blade. He is fury made flesh -violently slashing and hacking at her, beating her defence down, forcing her back again and again.

He senses panic starting to emanate from her now. Face twisting in enjoyment, Kylo feints, causing her to block in the wrong direction and cuts at her arm – just enough to cause the Scavenger to whimper.

“Not so much _fun_ now, is it, _girl?_ ” he roars, as he sweeps her feet from below her with his leg.

She lands painfully on her rear, rolling to dodge his downward strike, narrowly missing the end of his lightsaber as it stabs into the ground at the side of her head while she is still down. Her eyes flick to its crackling blade as she starts to scramble backwards on her hands, while he pulls the lodged blade from the snow again, advancing.

Kylo switches his handing, preparing for his final strike - to end this ridiculous nightly ‘dance’. Raising his blade, he watches as she struggles to grip the hilt of her lightsaber, pain from his earlier strike evident on her face.

“It’s over,” he smirks, “you’re finished.”

Frantically, she rolls backwards, landing on her feet and quickly spinning, before she darts off into the dark trees.

He watches – dumbfounded - before he realises he should be moving after her.

 _She’s fast_ , he observes, charging into the forest behind her. A perverse pleasure floods his veins as he gives chase.

His heart hammered in his chest, enjoying the feeling of hunting her, pursuing one so defiant and wild.

 _She’s trying to hide_ , he realised.

He couldn’t sense exactly where she was, and the falling snow was covering her tracks. Following those he could still make out - as they snap back and forth between the trees - he comes to a series of rocky outcroppings. _Instinct_ told him she was there, as he barrels toward it.

“I _know_ you’re here!” he bellows into the night, relishing the fact that he has her cornered, “ _I will find you!_ ”

                                                                                       

* * *

 

 

Rey woke with a start, _his_ dreadful baritone echoing in her ears.

_…Not so much fun now, is it, girl?..._

Her fingers traced where she had felt that terrible blade tear open her arm. _She had felt it._ It had _burned_.

_…It’s over, you’re finished..._

Worse still - she had _heard_ him. _She could see him._

 _He’s insane,_ she thinks, remembering the startling look in his eyes as he moved to deliver a killing blow.

_…I know you’re here!..._

Dread fills her as she tries to process what had happened. She had an awful feeling that _he_ had seen _her_ too. Not a figment or a fantasy of her. Not a dream.

He had really seen her.

_…I will find you!..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to change up Rey’s training in this version and cut out some of the old dialogue between Luke and Leia – it will probably be re-worked in at a later stage and as the story dictates, but I wanted to get her started off a bit more clearly than before.
> 
> I also edited the Kylo/Rey scene slightly – but I was pretty happy with it before.
> 
> Sidenote – If anyone’s looking for an awesome read/is a Zelda fan, I STRONGLY recommend reading FigmentForm’s ‘A Tale of Two Rulers’. I was never a ZelGan ship fan. Until now!
> 
> I've used a couple of tracks whilst writing this:-  
> ‘The Hologram/Binary Sunset'- John Williams - Luke & Leia's discussion.  
> 'Princess Leia's Theme' - John Williams - The Skywalker twins confront Rey (around 3:47 Leia tries to coax Luke off his lonely path of penitence).  
> 'Efrideet' - Michael Salvatori - Luke & Rey's training.  
> 'The Court of Oryx' - Michael Salvatori - Kylo's dream & Rey awakening from her nightmare.
> 
> Thanks again to everyone who's bookmarked/subscribed and/or left kudos - it means a lot :) I'd love to hear from y'all, please don't be shy in the comments!


	6. The Space Between Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The First Order re-group. 
> 
> Power Struggles Begin.

Kylo could not shake the feeling that he had felt _her_ presence the previous night.

The same shiver he had felt when he had spirited her away from Takodana, still lingered. The realisation troubled him as he paced through the corridors of the Finalizer, on his way to the command briefing that General Hux had called.

As the door slid open, he heard the silence wash over the personnel amassed in the room.

“Lord Ren… your timekeeping is _impeccable_ , as always,” sneered Hux, his angular features contorting into a sly smirk - green eyes flashing with malice - as he stared the fragment of night in the doorway down.

“I had other business to attend to…” Ren answered dismissively, as he moved around to the other side of the holo-map table. Its pale glow painted him with light and stark shadow from below – making him appear as a dread apparition. He eyed that it currently plotted the position of every ship in their flotilla, as they hunted a pocket of the Resistance spotted within the Raioballo sector.

“ _Business?_ ” scoffed Hux, riled at having been so blatantly disregarded, “ _Do_ share what ‘business’ was so much more urgent than this tactical review?” he spat, leaning down to spread his hands over the table’s surface, distorting the image as he did.

“Supreme Leader-” Kylo began, his voice raised and his disquiet in the Force causing several of the attendees’ datapads to begin rattling at the edges of the table.

“Supreme Leader ordered us to _eradicate_ the Resistance after the destruction of Starkiller base!” growled the flame-haired general, eyes sharp in warning, “or did you misinterpret his orders once again?”. The officious young General’s face twisted into a hateful smile, as he watched Ren’s shoulders tense. Resuming his poise, Hux recommenced his briefing, pleased at having muzzled the Lord of the Knights of Ren for the moment.

“Before we were so _rudely_ interrupted…” he began, “we have received reliable intelligence that a Resistance cell is operating between the following quadrants,” his eyes briefly flickered back over to the motionless Knight as the relevant portions of the star map flashed intermittently.

“Lieutenant Mitaka, if you would?” instructed Hux as he turned his head to the young officer, “Based on recent transmissions one of our patrol cruisers intercepted, we have triangulated the source back to this location.” The room watched in silence as a red line tracked from the cruiser position back to the Dantooine system.

“We will begin patrols _immediately_ -” announced one of the captains in attendance, a young woman of smaller stature but undeniable presence.

“Patrols will not draw them out, they’ve gone to ground…” demurred a silver haired commander, experience and not dismissal, hard in his voice.

Smirking again, Hux turned his back to the meeting, his figure framed dramatically by the passing starfield outside as he stared out of the viewport.

“ _Then we will leave them no ground to go to,_ ” he responded, tone clipped. A triangular, pincer formation of Star Destroyers simultaneously blinked into existence in the hologram.

“ _Excellent_ , General…” came the powerful voice of the Supreme Leader Snoke - hologram flickering into view from the darkened corner of the large room - towering in his throne.

Dropping immediately into a deferential kneel, Kylo lowered his head. Following suit, the attending commanding officers bowed theirs in turn to address their Supreme Leader.

Eyes falling on his errant Knight, the Dark Lord’s visage grew dark, “You may rise _Kylo_ Ren.”

Kylo couldn’t help the flinch which escaped him at the lack of any honorific in his Master’s address.

Gaze sweeping over the faces in the room, the mastermind of the First Order addressed the meeting’s chair and dismissed the meeting, “You may begin your operation, General Hux. _You_ have command.”

Kylo’s head snapped up at this.

 _Hux?_ _Command?_ he scorned internally, unable to control the anger beginning to boil within him. Passing Ren - slowing to display a fox-like smile - the arrogant General strode past at the head of the First Order officers streaming out of the room.

Anticipating that his Lord was not finished with him, Ren remained.

“Do not _presume_ to be back within my good graces, my apprentice,” the withered patriarch boomed, leering at the onyx-clad figure before him, “you may be powerful, yes - but you clearly still have _much_ to learn…”.

Kylo could feel the rage churning in his stomach, fighting the urge to smash whatever he could to alleviate it – even for a moment.

“You will resume your training,” continues Snoke, leaning forward, “I can sense your discord and lack of focus from here…” he drawls, his bony hands clawed on the arms of his throne.

His gaze seemed to bore into Kylo, filling him with a dread he had not felt since a young boy, before his Master’s disfigured face vanished. Standing still as a statue for a moment after, Kylo’s fist tightened in his leather glove as he stormed from the room. Boots pounding down the corridor, he angrily charged to his training room.

Fingers punching in the code to release his training droids, he dials between the different programs, bringing up a training setting entitled 'Grievous'.

Kylo moves to the centre of the room, angrily casting off his robes and tossing his helmet aside with an echoing clatter. He had barely taken his helm off when the first electrostaff comes rocketing towards him. He awkwardly arches backwards to avoid it – just retaining his footing. He winces at the overextension of his wounded side, still healing these months on. Twisting back into his opening stance, Kylo flares his lightsaber. He surges forward to duck past the return swing of the training droid, cleaving it clean in two, as he spins to dodge the two closing in from the rear.

As they crash together - insect-like metal limbs tangling - the third droid’s arms split into a quad formation.

Splitting the two electrostaffs into shorter baton-esque instruments, it whirls them around like a demented pinwheel, advancing on him. Catching sight of this out of the corner of his eye, Kylo strikes out at the droid, trying to keep it at a distance. It crashes two of its limbs down at him - the jolt rattling through his arms and he strains against them to keep the humming batons from his skin. The second pair - which he realises he has forgotten about foolishly - strike him in a crossing slash, winding him and causing him to nearly drop his lightsaber.

Pooling his pain into a roiling burst, he rushes his metallic foe with a powerful Force push, slamming it into the nearby wall. Using the opening created by its automatic recalibration – its bank of calculating red eyes scanning him and the surrounding environment - he catches half of droid he’d severed earlier in a vice-like Force grip, hurling it towards the pinned droid. A brief diversion created by the debris crashing into its spinning weapons, he rolls to the side, springing to his feet and slashing at its exposed rear.

Sending the automaton sparking wildly into its companions, Ren drops into a low stance, waiting for them to regroup and compute their next move. Circling each other slowly, the combatants’ probe for weaknesses in each other’s defences. The seconds drag out like an age.

A sudden flash of blaster fire and his hand flies out instinctively to catch the flurry of bolts in mid-air, crackling furiously around him as they jerk against his unnatural hold.

 _Cunning_ … he thinks, before he senses a jabbing move coming from behind. Whirling to cleave the attacker in two, he kicks after the hack, splitting the molten halves apart.

 _Two down_ , Kylo tallies mentally.

Spacing themselves to shadow his front and rear, the two remaining droids continue to prowl the perimeter of the training ring like pack hunters.

Switching tack - Kylo instead charges one, trying to bait the other into using the ‘opportunity’. As the droid speeds towards him, he drops suddenly, sliding below it. A flash from his battle with her a night before, dances in his mind. Spinning out of the way, he dismantles the metal marauder with an upward strike - using the Force to tear it apart entirely with a violent crush of pressure - sending smoking parts flying across the hall.

A sharp twinge catches him off guard – prompting him to glance at his side. He tries to re-focus and ignore it, eyes locked again on his final artificial opponent.

Squaring off against the last - almost wary - droid, Ren’s eyes narrow as he briefly acknowledges the distraction from that _damned waif_.

Impatience - and a _baser_ urge - brewing within him, Kylo sidesteps the droid as it attacks him, the hum of the electrostaff deafening as it misses its strike to his head. Concentrating the Force to his will and using it to gather all the fragmented metal strewn around him, he throws it with the speed of a blaster bolt.

A few seconds later, the honeycombed remains of the last of his training droids collapses with a loud crash, resounding within the training chamber.

Stilling for a moment, he closes his eyes - mind still racing - as he forces his heavy breathing back down to a slow and steady pace. The exertion is like fire in his muscles, but it was much needed, to try and tear his mind from that _damned girl_.

 _From R-_ , he catches himself before he finishes her name, settling for a moment until the other voice in his head chides him, _from your failure..._

A calm still eluding him, he uses the Force to pull his robes and mask to him, quickly covering his large frame before he leaves the smouldering remains to the clean-up crew and heads towards his chambers.

His thoughts drift back to the Scavenger again as he wanders back to his private sanctuary. Realising he had almost mimicked her improvisation of the previous night; a sullen expression falls across his face. He glowers and entering his rooms, he discards his robes and kicks off his boots, shifting at the feel of the cool steel beneath his bare feet.

Pacing into his wash room, he catches sight of himself in the mirror, before he readies himself for rest. His dark hair is slicked against his skin - sticking to his neck - eyes sunken with exhaustion. A stark maroon line runs from his lower chest downwards - contrasting against his pale skin. Blood, he quickly recognises.

Inspecting the wound carefully, he decides that it is little more than a nick, but that does not stop him from gritting his teeth hard when the water hits it during his evening shower.

Finishing, he steps out into the chill air, skin goose-bumping with the sensation. Robing himself, he strides out into the large living space. It is minimalist in decoration, but the fixtures are heavily stylised, with rich fabrics and upholstery to his lounging areas and large bed.

He sits on the bed, head leaning against the wall behind, mind replaying his beratement by his Master. It runs repeatedly in his head until his eyes are heavy and can no longer physically stay open.

 

* * *

 

Kylo’s vision eventually returns on a grassy field. A small area is even, with the rest sloping down to a path which curves away and another which disappears upwards towards imposing black cliffs. He notes that it is twilight.

He senses nothing as he pushes out with the Force.

He hears only a distant hushing, like waves crashing to shore and then receding.

Looking around his immediate surroundings, he sees no sign of any settlement. Deliberating whether to head uphill or downhill, Kylo feels himself being urged upwards – a strong pull tugging at somewhere below his ribcage. He begins to climb the path, the sensation growing stronger as he takes each step further. The sky darkens as he climbs, until he eventually comes to a larger, flat field. His eyes widen momentarily as he spots her – sitting stock still in the middle of the field. Illuminated only by the pale glow from the moon and the starlight above. She does not seem to sense his arrival at first, she appears unphased. _Serene_ , he notes, her poise familiar somehow – in a way he can’t quite place, but that gives him pause.

 _So, he’s found a new student then_ , he sneers to himself.

Kylo watches her for a few minutes, until he sees a frown darken her expression, not opening her eyes to search for him yet. Choosing then to announce his presence, he releases a dark pulse – watching as her eyes snap open as the sensation hits her – his thoughts centred on the memory of her striking him down. Rage flooding through him, he can’t help when his face twists into a malevolent smirk, when he realises that she _knows_ it’s him. Stalking through the knee length grass of the field, he can see her eyes flickering hither and thither, looking for her way out.

“That’s close enough!” Rey shouts, eyes like fire.

 _Is this her, or just an illusion?_ he wonders, the expression on her face affecting him in a way he dares not acknowledge.

Taking another step towards her, Kylo’s keen eyes do not miss the fact that she instantly snaps into a defensive position, lightsaber reigniting.

“I said that’s close enough!” she growls through her teeth, thrusting her saber in warning. He can sense her anger now. It hits him like a punch.

 _It is her_ , he snarls inwardly, indignant fury and a deeper primal feeling boiling within him as he activates his own unorthodox lightsaber.

“Why are you here?” she yells, taking a step back to put more distance between them.

Closing the distance again, he prowls around her - blade readied. She eyes him cautiously, watching him - gauging whether to attack or retreat.

“Are you here to _kill_ me - to hunt me down?” Rey asks, voice bristling.

 _Kill her?_ he asks himself. Part of him would love nothing more - given the humiliation she has made him endure since his defeat at her hands, but the Supreme Leader wants her. Kylo knows he cannot afford to disappoint him again…

“I’m not here to _kill_ you, girl,” he grinds out, still prowling the edge of their meeting place, saber lowered, but still visible. “Is that _all_ he’s shown you, Scavenger?” he laughs, cruelly nodding to her blade.

“He’s shown me _enough_!” she spits, flourishing her blade in warning when he steps forward again, her eyes wild.

“I wonder if he _has_?” he mocks, lunging towards her - his saber bared. Thinking he’s caught the girl off-guard, Kylo is surprised when she instead fiercely meets his blow, narrowly deflecting it.

 _Her angle is awkward, but her form is good_ , he notes, catching her counterstrike with a wide sweep of his lightsaber - knocking her back and staggering her.

“ _How_ did you find me?” Rey growls, locking blades with him as she briefly rallies herself once more.

In truth, Kylo did not understand that himself. He’d had an inkling now for weeks that _something_ was going on in his nightly ‘visitations’ - ever since he’d started to feel a different presence within them. It wasn’t until he had been forced out of the vision in the desert and had cornered her in the snowfield, that he began to suspect that there was _something more_ at work. What exactly, he is not sure of... _yet_.

He breaks their lock, trying to jab at her with the edge of his blade - but she ducks out of range, dashing off to one side. Frustrated, Kylo tries to pull her towards him, the effort of trying to resist him knocking Rey off her feet. Cutting off her saber, she rolls – cat-like, landing on all fours. He catches her glare as she swiftly rises again, unable to help the smirk her expression provokes. Throwing out her hand, he feels something solid connect with the back of his knees – he only realises she has tripped him when the night sky fills his vision. With the end of her staff now in his face as he lies there in a graceless heap, he fumes, inwardly.

 _Good-_ , he thinks, eyes fixed on her glistening features - the toll of fending him off evident on her skin, _-but I’m better_ , he gloats to himself.

As she moves to jab him, he channels the Force to freeze her to the spot, using his anger to concentrate his power. Trying again to struggle against him, her eyes grow frantic as she watches him coolly dust himself off and rise to full height, massive against her smaller frame. She would be intimidated if she was not filled with the urge to wipe that dark look of amusement off his face.

Kylo releases her suddenly - she plummets forward - cursing as she grazes her hands whilst trying to break her fall.

Remembering that he has a mission, Ren decides to offer her some form of answer to her question. “I… do not know,” he admits – honesty to his tone - before a generous measure of sarcasm enters it, “but I’m _sure_ your Master will…”

“He _does_ share with you _everything_ , _does he not?_ ” he asks, his deep, rich voice dripping with poisonous intent.

Doubt flashes across Rey’s eyes. He would have missed it, if he had not been watching her for a reaction, _so intently_.

Sensing a spike of emotion within her, he has the confirmation he needs that he has hit a nerve. A small twinge within his chest sinks a bit at her expression. A brief image from a memory from long ago flashes in his mind and he remembers discovering when secrets were kept from him – prompting his own face to fall.

“ _He doesn’t_ , does he?” compassion beginning to bleed into Kylo’s voice – almost gentle now – as he paces slowly towards her.

Silence greets him as her head bows, a soft breeze rustling the grass around them.

Kylo pauses, deliberating whether continuing would provoke the wrong response. When she does not react to his next step forward, he proceeds. Hand raising, he hesitates for a moment, before reaching for her. Her head whips back up, fury meeting him as she slaps his hand away with a loud ‘crack’.

“Get away from me, _monster!_ ” she hisses, tears glistening in her eyes, as she spins on her heal and darts away.

He reaches for her again - almost connecting - before she rapidly vanishes, leaving behind only the still night air.

He regards his hand – studying it – before he lowers it once more. He turns his eyes to the night sky, the blackness seeming to grow even darker in her absence.

                                                                                     

* * *

 

 

Kylo wakes to the feeling of cool liquid at his eyes. _Tears?_ he wonders. Instinctually reaching his hand to the sensation, his fingers are met with dry skin.

The feeling troubles him. It is a foreign sensation, but the knowledge that it may _hers_ , is intoxicating to him.

He wonders – foolishly, he knows – if some small part of her cares for him. Is curious about him, as he is of her.

 _‘Cares’ may be the wrong word_ , he tells himself - but he knows that if she can feel this connection as strongly as he does, then she must know some semblance of what he has been experiencing since their fateful meeting in the snow on Starkiller. _The real one_.

There is something about her he finds _intriguing_. _She is proud_ – something she shares with himself, he acknowledges – _but she is also brave and strong_.

He admits to himself that she is strong not only in the Force, but in spirit. He had not realised the hardship she must have endured as an orphan – not until the dreams had started. He realises though, that it is not pity he feels, but something else. _A respect._

 _She had lowly beginnings_ , he notes – then the realisation hits him – _beginnings like grandfather_.

Kylo knows all to well that greatness can come from small beginnings. His grandfather was living _proof_ of that.

Yet there is some that he has gleaned from their nightly meetings, that reminds him of the stories his mother used to tell him when he was younger, _of his grandmother…_

Of how she was brave and fierce. Of how she fought for what she believed to be right. How she stood for the good of the Galaxy and when faced with dire odds, she did not flinch.

He wonders then if they are so different – he and the girl – that if they had met at some point prior to their meeting in the snow, if things may have been different. If she would have been more easily able to see things from his perspective.

_If she would have taken up his offer, given so earnestly in the snow…_

_…Get away from me, monster!..._

The words echo over and over in his mind.

 _Is that all she sees?_ he wonders, some small part of him hoped that she could see past that.

_That he could make her._

He wondered if she awoke every night – in the early morning silence – reeling from the dreams. Unsure of herself. Of where she stood. _Of everything._

He swings his long legs from his bed, sitting for a moment, head in his hands as he deliberates how he can broach his recent ‘development’ with his Master. Whether it will win him back _favour_. Whether it is _dangerous_ for him.

_Whether it is dangerous for the girl._

_She’s shown me no such concern…_  he berates himself, as his fingers trace the angry scar now plain on his face.

His mind returning to Snoke, Kylo worries whether he had sensed something from him in the last few weeks. If that is the reason for the Supreme Leader’s unannounced appearance at the meeting earlier. Anxiety begins to spread within him about how he can keep this secret concealed.

If he even should.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve excised what I eventually decided was a superfluous scene with Rey heading to reflect on events as she cleansed herself for the day.
> 
> Instead, I’ve extended the end scene with Kylo slightly. Very slightly.
> 
> Sidenote – If anyone’s looking for a great read, I cannot recommend YoukaiYume’s Raindrops doujinshi strongly enough!
> 
> I've used a couple of tracks whilst writing this: -  
> ‘Redemption Through Blood' - Ramin Djawadi (Around the 2:00 mark is Snoke's rebuke of Kylo about not being back in his good graces
> 
> 'You've Brought Snakes to My Garden' - Austin Wintory – Kylo’s meeting with the Supreme Leader.
> 
> 'Last Stand' - Michael Salvatori - Kylo flares his saber around 0:31, this track inspired the training scene.
> 
> ‘Forest of Dreams’ – Chris Tilton – Kylo and Rey’s meeting in the training field.
> 
> ‘Love and Death on Observer Island’ – Chris Tilton – Kylo thinking back on their meeting.
> 
> Thank you to everyone who's been reading so far, your hits/bookmarks/subs and kudos are all appreciated! Please, let me know if you've been enjoying it in the comments :)


	7. Blossoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo clashes with Hux. 
> 
> Snoke hatches a Dark plan. 
> 
> Rey continues her training and drifts into another vision of the past.
> 
> WARNING – FEELS AHEAD

Rey and Luke were training again in the field they used for her lessons. Despite feeling like she was making even tiny amounts of progress, Rey felt herself growing increasingly frustrated as the day wore on. She knew that there was a reason that Luke was taking his time with showing her the basics and helping her refine the abilities she already had – but she was also irked that they hadn’t began with more offensive, or even defensive techniques. The mid-day sun was high in the sky now, with the occasional chirp of the strange little cliff-dwellers punctuating the silence and the dull sound of insects in the background – ‘Porgs’, Luke had called the bizarre small avians.

The exertion had caused her to work up quite a sweat and they hadn’t had a break all morning. Her mouth was dry as dust and it took every ounce of her willpower to push herself to complete their session – her well-honed survival instincts called her to get into the shade until the worst of the heat had passed.

Her last meeting with the obsidian shade who haunted her nightly, weighed on her heavily.

Despite Ahch-To being a relatively temperate world - edging on the _wetter_ end of the spectrum - it was evidently the summer season and Rey had begun to grow accustomed to the climate during her stay. Her skin no longer held the same golden tan it had on Jakku and she felt the heat here more than she’d ever remembered feeling it on the dry, desert planet. _Perhaps it’s a result of having grown soft?_ She wondered, lazily.

When her footing grew lazier and her blade work grew less composed, Luke called time on their session. Rey was _exhausted_. All she wanted to do was go back to her chambers and rest, until the worst of the heat had passed, or find a tree to nap in the shade of.

“How have you been sleeping, since our talk?” asked her Master, his cerulean eyes watching her intently.

“I’ve been sleeping… _better_ ,” she replied, hoping that her half-truth would go unnoticed. Fidgeting with her topknot, she loosened her slicked hair, trying to cool herself down.

“Good,” he smiled on her response, “…good,” nodding to himself. “I think I’ll go and check on my sister during our recess - see if she’s staying out of trouble,” Luke announced, releasing Rey to her own devices until they resumed their session after the day had cooled.

Watching him saunter off across the field, Rey decided to head up towards a large, round-canopied tree at the top of the slope from the training field and gathered her things. Enjoying every second of the large swig she took from her canteen before setting off, water spilled over her mouth in her rush to guzzle the water down. Partly annoyed at herself for wasting water, she reminded herself that at least here it wasn’t really wasted, it would give life to the moss and grass of the field.

Wandering through the long grass at the edge of the field, leading up to the tree, she recalled _his_ ‘visit’ from the night before.

She had barely been able to fend him off physically - let alone through the Force. The closer Kylo Ren got, the stronger the sensation felt. She _really_ hoped Luke – as her mentor - would be able to give her some news on whatever was going on with her - and soon. Slumping down under the tree - her back to its trunk - she sat for a moment, watching the light dance between the leaves blowing in the breeze. The earth was soft below the tree, the grass shorter and denser with moss. She lay back, cushioned in the plush vegetation, stretching out her aching muscles.

Her eyes followed the passing clouds half-closed and Rey felt herself dozing. Before long, she had drifted off to a lazy slumber.

                                                                             

* * *

 

 

Kylo had been training heavily all day and into the night, since his abrupt awakening in the early hours. Desperate to distract himself from the night before, he threw himself into a _punishing_ work out.

His broad frame was coated in perspiration, as he’d been holding himself stalk-straight - inverted – up on his burning arms for longer than he ever had before. Teeth gritting in conviction, he continued like that, abdomen beginning to heave with the effort of continuing to hold himself in such a position. He vaguely heard the door to the training room hissing open - not bothering himself to care who had just walked in - he didn’t even need to look up to tell who it was.

Silver boots polished to a mirror-like finish stopped dead in front of his face. He knew before she even uttered a word, that it was Phasma.

“Your _presence_ has been requested on the bridge, Sir,” she pressed, standing at ease.

He knew from her tone that she was not particularly happy about being sent on this _particular errand_ for that idiot. Despite her position, reporting directly to the officious General who was so often his verbal - and occasionally, physical - sparring partner, Kylo liked to think he had a certain level of amicable rapport with the Stormtrooper Captain. She was efficient. _And effective_.

Using his legs to swing himself forward, he pushed hard into a handspring with his arms and righted himself onto his feet. The only sign that Phasma found the sight of his ungainly frame moving with even a _modicum_ of grace amusing, was the cock of her head to one side.

“I do believe you’re _trying_ to be late this time, Lord Ren,” she muttered, turning her back to allow him to robe himself and attempt to make himself presentable, before reporting to the Finalizer’s bridge.

“I’m _never_ late, Phasma,” he smirked up at her as he pulled his mask to him from where he had placed it, across the room, “you know that…”

“ _Knowing_ and _believing_ are two different things,” she responded in her clipped, modulated voice. Watching her stride off, he soon followed suit, wondering what on earth the blithering fool could be wanting at this hour.

When they finally arrive at the bridge, he allows Phasma to herald their arrival, usually providing a form of mediation between the flame haired General and the Dark-side user.

“Lord Ren to see you, as requested, General,” announced the chrome-armoured Captain, her presence on the bridge not even provoking a second glance from any of the bridge crew. However, the moment Kylo’s heavy footfalls came into earshot, every officer seemed to sit and stand a little straighter. They were on edge. He was well-known for his _temper_. Especially when he crossed paths with Hux.

“So, you _can_ follow orders…” was Hux’s biting initial volley. His arms were neatly folded behind his back and he didn’t even deign to turn from the review of their charted course, as he addressed the onyx column of a man he held in such despise.

“I _believe_ it was termed as a ‘request’,” Kylo fired back - the electronic intonations of his mask largely hiding the bristling edge to his voice.

“ _Hn_ ,” was all the response he received, before Hux shot him a cursory glance. “Our reconnaissance droids have picked up what appears to be Resistance activity at the following coordinates,” he intoned, pacing towards Ren and thrusting the datapad at him, “we’ve plotted a course to arrive in 72 hours,” he continued.

“Why the delay?” challenged Kylo, moving closer to the young General.

“I don’t _believe_ you’re in any position to request my handling of the matter, Lord Ren...” Hux responded sharply, “or have you forgotten that our Supreme Leader assigned _me_ command of this operation?” he continued tersely, rounding on the Dark apprentice - every syllable enunciated snidely.

Since Starkiller, Hux had been pushing his boundaries, ambition burning ever more brightly. His fear of Kylo had largely disappeared when he’d had to retrieve the fallen Knight’s broken form from where the Scavenger had left him.

Whilst his mask did an excellent job of concealing a face currently contorting with murderous rage - the entire bridge went silent with the tension that fell between the two – the _hatred_ radiating from Kylo’s shaking form palpable to all present. Hux took a step back at the feeling, eliciting a quiet snort of amusement from Kylo.

Attempting to diffuse matters, Phasma’s cool voice interjected.

“If the intention is to track them down, General - it may be worthwhile for you to provide us with the reconnaissance data in advance of our usual briefing window” she posited, whilst evaluating the two men “– given that there’s a potential for the traitor, FN-2187, or the _Force-sensitive_ to be present.”

The two men continued to exchange murderous expressions.

“It would allow sufficient time to prepare our squad leaders and for them to disseminate the relevant tactical data to their platoons,” Phasma continued, keen to get them both to stand down.

“An _excellent_ idea, Captain,” smiled Hux.

The smile he now wore would have unnerved Kylo, had he ever suffered from being intimidated by the fool.

The knight instead was struck by a slow swelling of apprehension at the knowledge that he may cross paths with _her_ again. His scar seemed to burn as he mentally relived their battle in the snow. He couldn’t be sure exactly how he would react if it turned out she _was_ there.

Should he try to commune with his Master - try to explain himself – Kylo wondered silently.

He certainly didn’t want to have to try to defend himself from the Supreme Leader should he _fail_ again… He could still _feel_ the agony from when he’d been meted his punishment, as if it were still happening. The crushing weight of the disappointment he could still sense from his Master.

Kylo had given up _everything_.

His family.

His heart.

_His soul._

…And he had _nothing_ to show for it.

_He would not fail this time._

He was drawn from his thoughts again by Phasma’s conclusion.

“-I’ll begin overseeing preparations,” she bowed, before swiftly turning on her heel and heading for the door. Stopping in the doorway to glance back at Kylo, she spared him a look, shaking her head lightly before marching off.

“Do you have something to _add_ , Ren?” Hux asked disinterestedly, having begun reviewing another datapad he’d been handed since Phasma’s departure.

Restraining himself from choking the life from the bane of his existence - because of the growing abrasiveness on display - Kylo instead requested that all available data on the traitor and the girl be transferred to his private quarters. Arching a russet eyebrow in question – due to the lack of the outburst he’d anticipated, Hux curtly nodded and began arranging for the files to be made available.

Kylo strode back to his room - resolve strong - having made the decision to try to contact his Master and begin to figure out just what this _was_ that was happening between him and the girl. He wouldn’t reveal everything just yet. The interaction with someone so similar to himself in so many ways, was… invigorating. It was also one of the few things which was _truly_ his own and he didn’t want to have to give up anything else…

He sat himself down, quickly removing his mask and placing it to his side, he ran a hand through his waved locks before turning on his holo-emitter on the low flat metal table in front of him. A brief flicker of light and he was met with the piercing gaze of his Master.

“Lord Ren... I assume you have some _news_ for me on the operation?” Snoke began, expectation filling his voice.

“We… have begun preparations to investigate Resistance activity, my Master,” Kylo responded, dropping from his seat into a deep, deferential kneel.

Disinterest bled into the Supreme Leader’s features at the news, whilst he propped his head up with one withered hand.

“…Intelligence suggests there is a possibility that the _girl_ may be present,” Kylo finished reporting, not daring to look up.

“Do you know that the girl is there for a _fact_?” barked Snoke, his withered hands clasping together, suddenly much more interested than he had been a moment before.

“We-,” Kylo started, now unsure if contacting his Master was a good idea.

“ _Do you or do you not?_ ” snapped the imposing hologram, which seemed to fill Kylo’s more reserved living space.

“We… do not, but I-,” he stammered, caught of guard by his Master’s renewed investment.

Kylo hesitated.

 _How can I raise this ‘development’, without giving everything away?_ he thought.

An idea began to form in his mind, as he fought with himself about how to tell his Master of the visions and of how much he should share.

“You have _other_ news of the girl then?” enquired Snoke, eyes gleaming as he watched his apprentice.

“I have been having _visions…_ of the girl. Of her past. Her present. I’m not sure…” Kylo explained – pausing for a moment - trying to gauge his Master’s response to the news.

“Visions? _Do_ continue, Lord Ren…” came Snoke’s amused response. He leaned back in his throne, hands steepled beneath his chin.

It certainly hadn’t been the reaction that Kylo had been expecting.

Grounding himself again, Kylo did as he was bid.

“They began without much to report, but they’ve grown to become like… some form of _communication_ \- like a bond.” He instantly regretted the tinge of excitement in the Supreme Leader’s tone. His Master’s distorted face twisted into a cruel approximation of a smile - teeth exposed in a near-rictus grin.

“A _bond_ , you say?” Snoke’s eerie expression grew ever more unsettling as he leaned forward again, “Oh, my apprentice, this is _most excellent_ news…” his aged voice chuckled.

“I am glad it pleases you, Master. I was worried you may have perceived it as another _distraction_ \- as the Light trying to sway me once more…” spluttered Kylo in his relief.

“Rise, _Lord_ _Ren_ , this may be a _most fortuitous_ development and has gone _some_ way to restoring my faith in you,” Snoke announced, gesturing for his once-errant Knight to stand.

Kylo couldn’t help the small smile he released at this.

“What would you have me do, Supreme Leader?” he asked, bowing his head.

“Continue to learn what you can. See what she has learned in the time since… _Starkiller…_ ” Snoke began, “…and see if there are any weaknesses we may exploit to show her another… _point of view_ ,” came the aged patriarch’s response, malevolent intent dripping in his voice.

“By your order,” bowed Ren, as the hologram flickered out of existence.

Kylo was caught between elation at having been absolved by his Master and disquiet at what he had been asked to do.

He sat again – alone - staring at his shrine to his Grandfather, desperately hoping for communion with him. _For guidance._

He was met with silence.

 

* * *

 

 

The sun was high in the sky, the heat almost unbearable. At first, Rey thought she had awoken from her nap beneath the tree.

It didn’t take her long however to realise that she was no longer in the field.

She was snapped out of her daze by the hum of the lightsaber by her ear. The glow was unfamiliar, a pale turquoise in comparison to the pale blue she usually wielded. She sensed a swing coming to her flank and rolled, catching the flash of her opponent’s broader blade slicing into the ground where she had stood but a moment before. She spun, pushing out hard with the Force, knocking her foe off his feet and sliding him along the gravel upon which they stood. She recognised the Zabrak male as the one she had engaged in brief conversation with in one of her previous ‘visions’.

 _Korrin, was it?_ Rey tried to remember.

He swung himself upwards with a flourish of his legs - as if to ward off any further strike - reigniting his blade as he did.

She could feel the perspiration on her skin, it felt like they had been doing this for a while. Her arms were bare, her over-robes discarded. Hair sticking to her neck, she could feel the sweat on her brow and back, watching carefully as he circled again. _He was strong_ , she noted quickly, _very strong._

Korrin rushed forward - attempting to unsettle her - but she quickly darted out of the way, skilfully managing to dodge the feint of his fist.

 _Strong, but not as fast…_ Rey observed. 

As she settled into her defensive stance again, she was now aware of the many sets of eyes upon her. _One set in particular._ Casting a sidelong glance, she caught his dark eyes urging her on. She couldn’t help but smile at that.

A wide swing from Korrin’s yellow saber caused her to drop backwards into a dramatic arch of her back, skipping a breath as the blade swiped above her harmlessly. Flipping herself back up with a handspring, she used the delay of his swing finishing to put distance between the two of them - waiting for him to attempt to attack again. She didn’t have to wait long. His broad blade slashed at her, provoking a rapid flurry of counter parries from the resolute young woman.

He retreated for the moment, exhaustion beginning to show on his tattooed face, his amber eyes crinkling in annoyance at their fight having dragged on so long.

She could feel _his_ encouragement.

 _He_ – Ben – was openly reaching out to her through the Force. Glancing briefly back at him, his face lit up with a smile as beautiful as the stars. _It captivated Rey_. Then she reminded herself of what he was now.

A swift change of his bright expression – like a candle being snuffed out - was her only warning to turn around.

She was caught in the face with the pommel of Korrin’s saber, knocking her painfully onto her back. A ripple of concern coursed towards her Ben and elicited a hushed gasp from the audience around the field.

Ben moved nearer to her and Rey could _feel_ his concerned gaze. Dizzied - but hauling herself up again - she shot him a small nod before she jumped back up, readying her blade.

Rey told herself she’d been caught off guard by a cheap move from her opponent – not the smile of a man long lost.

Korrin was waiting for her, a nervous smile playing on his face.

“ _Sorry…_ ” he laughed, trepidation in his tone and his saber drawn back in a defensive position. He obviously expected her to retaliate immediately, but she stood her ground, waiting him out.

Golden eyes narrowing, Korrin cast a look towards Ben, causing her eyes to follow suit.

Ben was shooting _daggers_ at him. Quirking an eyebrow at Ben, she pushed back through the Force, like a soft brush to the back of the hand. He seemed to stiffen for a moment, before his posture relaxed and his eyes swung to her, much softer than they had been. She smiled briefly, before returning her eyes to Korrin, whose face seemed to only frown harder.

The Zabrak rushed her then, his speed disarming despite his muscular frame. Before he reached her, she closed her eyes in focus - her breathing even. He was almost upon her, her arms raised in preparation for the powerful swing she could sense he was about to release from his blade. _If it connected…_ Rey thought, she knew if it did that their match was over. Just as Korrin reached a foot away from her, she gracefully stepped aside - deactivating her saber. She spun low, dropping into a sweeping kick, putting him onto the back foot as she flared her blade again. His eyes raced to her, whilst his body struggled to keep up - knocked off his feet by the effort to dodge her reactivated blade, crashing towards him like a returning wave. Korrin now lay on his back, in an undignified reversal of their positions from minutes before.

Her blade brandished at his neck in victory, she held it there with supreme restraint as they both regained their breath, before shutting it off to offer him a hand up.

“ _Wonders never cease_ , Reina,” the taller Jedi muttered, dusting himself off. “I don’t know if it’s fitting that you fight with a style so… _fluid_ ,” he laughed, the reference to her homeland causing a small bubble of laughter to burst forth from her.

“Maybe if you didn’t fight with a style so reminiscent of _yours_ …” she heard the young woman’s voice tease playfully, robing herself again. She didn’t miss the flicker of jealousy on Ben’s features as she glanced up. Rey had noticed over the course of their previous encounters here that he didn’t seem to be keen on the close camaraderie the maiden held with Korrin. She understood that Tutor Karas thought she should pay it little mind, that he was young, that it would pass.

“Good match, Tutor Gan Reval,” she bowed to Korrin, before stepping down off the large stone platform.

“And to you, Tutor Karas,” Korrin smiled at her, before turning to address one of his students.

Rey also knew that the two tutors often took to sparring during the recess between classes. They had decided that it was a good way to demonstrate the practical application of the lessons they were trying to pass on to their students, as well as to keep their skills sharpened and hone them where there were weaknesses. She was lost in these thoughts, walking the path past the students now beginning to file back to the main temple, when she felt a presence beside her.

_Ben._

“How did you know just when to refrain from meeting his blade - to dodge it instead?” he marvelled, voice thick with admiration.

“I suppose it was instinct,” Rey felt the woman – Reina - smile, her green eyes crinkling with the action.

“Could… Could you show me how to do it?” he asked, shyly.

“Ben… I-, " Rey heard the woman’s voice start saying, unsure of whether this was a conversation they should continue right now.

“I. _Oh-_ ," he replied in a small voice, his eyes downcast.

Rey felt the pang of guilt that struck Reina’s chest at that.

“…I _suppose_ I could…” she responded playfully. She felt the corners of her mouth tugging up when his face split into his endearing grin again.

“ _Thank you_!” Ben smiled broadly, before they fell into a comfortable silence.

They had walked to the top of the field together. Rey could see the flowers still in bloom and the crystalline lake from before, off in the distance. They were alone.

Ben felt the calm from her, like a soft breeze. He watched her out of the corner of his eye, as she moved to sit down, hands running through the flowers around her. He was curious about the little gesture.

“It reminds me of home,” she offered, smiling up at him briefly when she saw his expression.

He loved any small titbit of information she offered to him, holding onto them like precious relics.

“Where _was_ home?” he asked quietly, hand brushing against hers as he sat down close beside her, to her left. She stilled for a moment at the contact - looking up at him through her lashes - trying to hide the blush on her cheeks, before she glanced up again. It was a blush Rey could feel as real as if it were her own and she wasn’t entirely sure that she wasn’t too.

Reina shifted to sit forward with her elbows loosely on her knees.

“Naboo. In the lake country,” she smiled softly, turning her eyes to the field again.

 _Naboo..._ Ben mulled over.

“My… grandmother was from Naboo,” he said softly. He ran his fingers through the cool moss below his hands, before his long dark hair tipped forward and he released a gentle laugh. “My mother said she was _beautiful_ \- inside and out.”

Ben cast his companion a look with an unreadable expression on his face.

 _Like you…_ he thought, the ache of longing in his chest almost unbearable. He couldn’t stop himself edging forward.

Rey – and she guessed, the woman she inhabited - could sense something was bothering him. Turning to look at him again, her breath hitched in her throat.

 _He was so close_.

His eyes, Rey noted, had flecks of golden amber to them. She found she couldn’t tear her eyes away. Feeling her heart begin to quicken, she could feel it pounding against her – Reina’s - ribcage.

Ben moved closer, his eyes half-lidded in the evening sun. Her pulse hammered in her ears. Fingers brushing her hair behind her ear, she thrilled at the shudder that went through her at his touch.

She could feel her lips parting in anticipation, as he leaned in.

His lips brushed hers – chastely – asking if she was okay with this. _With him._

Rey felt Reina begin to respond, softly – stopping him from pulling away. She leaned closer to him, the fingers of her left hand intertwining loosely with his, before her right hand slowly moved up to place her fingers gently on the angle of his jaw – guiding him back to her. She returned his kiss – gently – beginning to let the feeling of him wash over her.

 _He was so open,_ Rey thought – or was it Reina – she wasn’t sure this time.

 _He didn’t try to hide anything from her_ , she realised.

His answer received, Ben moved to deepen their kiss - his lips soft but demanding against hers and his fingers moving to clasp hers – sending heat throughout her body.

                                                                                             

* * *

 

 

Rey’s eyes blinked open, noting the canopy of the tree above her and the sun being much lower in the sky. Her skin felt hot, but the shade of the tree should have cooled her down from earlier.

She felt her heart racing – exhilarated – then followed by a twinge not long after, as she recalled what she had seen in her latest vision.

 _He had loved her_ , Rey suspected now, _Ben had… at least_.

Shuddering at the knowledge of what he had eventually done to the young woman Rey now thought _he_ had loved, she hauled herself to her feet - determined to force the images from her head by throwing herself into her afternoon practice. She could sense Master Luke approaching up the path from the lower slope and focused on steadying her breathing and sealing away the sensations which still ran through her. At least until later, when she could try to make sense of them.

As she made her way down the slope, Rey thought she felt a feeling like _disappointment_ as she did, from somewhere in the back of her mind.

She froze when she swore she heard a voice.

“ _Don’t go…_ ” it whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***UPDATED*** There was a bit of plot which I’ve reworked extensively in a few chapters – which had a bit of setup here – so I’ve tried to address that.
> 
> And from feedback received for the original version, I’ve tried to clear things up a bit more in terms of what Rey sees and feels when she’s in the visions and how that affects her – it will become clearer as the story progresses as well.
> 
> Sidenote – If anyone is interested in Final Fantasy-like world building and art with a healthy dash of Eldritch horror, I seriously recommend the graphic novel series Monstress. The artwork is beautiful, the story has you at the edge of your seat and… seriously… just go read it! Go now!
> 
> I've used a couple of tracks whilst writing this: -  
> ‘Excerpt from the Ruin' - Michael Salvatori - Rey and Luke taking a break
> 
> 'Haunted' - Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross - Kylo's meetings in the bridge and his quarters
> 
> 'Young Wolf’ - Michael Salvatori - Rey's Dream (sparring match - around 0:58 she dodges the first strike of Korrin's lightsaber; 2:33 she's hit in the face by his saber pommel; 3:02 she rallies herself again)
> 
> 'A Way of Life’ - Hans Zimmer - Ben & Reina (1:11 they reach the field of flowers; 2:05 Ben starts to edge closer; around the 3:24 mark Reina returns his kiss and we switch back to Rey's POV with her segment starting around 4:01)
> 
> Finally - a BIG, BIG thank you to everyone who has read/is reading and to all those who've left kudos/bookmarked/subscribed - I really appreciate it! Let me know if you've been enjoying the story and I'll see you guys at the next update :)


	8. The Ashen Plain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo asks to be shown the way. 
> 
> Rey’s dreams show her the strangest thing she’s encountered yet.

Kylo had spent close to two whole days poring over the files on the girl that Hux had transferred to him. Dozens of datapads were strewn around his hunched form, sat on the floor at the end of his bed with his black robe splayed open, bare chest exposed. His long legs were arched in front of him as he sat in total concentration. He was entirely absorbed in reading report after report on her – having felt it best to delegate the traitor to his former Captain. His mind flew through the information appearing on each new screen. He devoured any tiny hint of her movements – any background their intelligence network had been able to dig up.

On the whole, Kylo had to admit that he’d not learned much about her past, other than that she was _not_ born on Jakku. He now confirmed his hunch from seeing the rows upon rows of tiny tallies she had left herself - that she had _never_ left Jakku until encountering FN-2187. He also now knew that she had been under the employ of a Junker for a large part of her life there.

 _There may be leads to follow there…_ he noted to himself.

 _She came from nothing. From nowhere…_ He pondered silently, _…and yet the Force manifests in her, with such raw power-_

Catching himself digressing in his musings again, Kylo tried to refocus his attention towards completing review of the data they had – however limited it may be. He was exhausted though and having spent the past few days concentrating _only_ on her had meant that she was _all_ that was in his mind.

He let out a long exhale, bringing his eyes up from the cold blue glow of the multitude screens to give them a few moments rest, when he caught sight of the molten remains of the mask on its altar.

_It seemed to call to him._

The pull growing stronger, he crossed his chamber towards it in several long strides. Kylo settled down in front of it, hands bridged in front of his nose as he calmed his breathing, then moved to sit straight-backed with his hands on his knees. Drawing a breath in and out. In and out. He could feel a presence in the room with him – familiar, but at the same time - distinctive.

 _Grandfather,_ Kylo realised.

“I… need guidance. I can feel it - the Light – again,” Kylo murmured, sitting forwards and combing his hands through his hair.

The moments drew out. _Nothing._ Only silence in response.

“ _Please…_ ” Kylo pleaded, desperation beginning to bleed into his tone. Agitated, he shifted to turn and head to ready himself for bed when he felt himself being pinned bodily to the chair by something unseen. _He couldn’t move._ His body tremored with the sensation, every primal instinct within him urging himself to fight against it - but it was overpowering.

 _‘Boy…’_ came the familiar, rumbling voice. It echoed loudly within the caverns of his mind.

Kylo felt the crushing sensation dissipate, like his muscles were released from their invisible bindings.

 _‘Speak,’_ it commanded.

“ _The girl..._ I can sense her and not just when we’re close,” Kylo rushed out, “It’s _all of the time_ now, in my waking hours, _my dreams-”_

‘ _She fills your thoughts?_ ’ questioned Vader, the tone imperious.

“ _…Yes,_ ” the young Knight responded, an embarrassed edge to his voice. “Sometimes it’s like I can feel what she’s feeling…” he sighed in exasperation.

‘ _A physical aspect?_ ’ boomed the Dark Lord, voice seeming to fill the space. There was an almost excited undertone to the presence that seemed _so similar_ to the reaction of Kylo’s Master, but the anxiety flooding Kylo’s veins forced him to set that aside. Fear began to claw its way into his mind, a small cringe played on his face.

He didn’t like disappointing his Master.

Disappointing Grandfather was in a _completely different_ league.

 _‘Most troubling…’_ reflected the Sith Lord, silent for several long minutes.

 Kylo’s heart thundered in his ears whilst he waited for his Grandfather’s response.

‘…But, perhaps _useful_ ’ came his eventual, deep-voiced reply.

 “Please, _teach me?_ ” Kylo asked, dropping to his knees to offer himself. Conflict raged in his heart again – something didn’t feel right. He couldn’t quite pinpoint what it was, but something about Grandfather’s sudden reconnection after so many months of silence seemed _unusual_.

‘I will train you,’ began Vader, ‘but you will have to _prove_ yourself first.’ 

His face hidden by his dark mane, Kylo felt a rush of excitement – prompting him to cast the dubiety gnawing at him about the situation he currently found himself in, to one side. _Grandfather had just agreed to train him._ Grandfather.

“Anything,” exclaimed Kylo, bowing more deeply, “I’ll do anything.”

‘ _Good…_ ’ echoed the voice, growing distant again. Then the presence seemed to fade and Kylo was alone once again.

Pride began to swell within his chest.

Soon - with Grandfather’s help - he would _best_ the girl. _He would dominate her._

The alien thought surprised Kylo initially, but the more he turned it over inside his head, the more he grew to enjoy the unbidden images it evoked. A dazed smile formed on his lips, as he became lost in them.

                                                                             

* * *

 

 

Poe had come to see Rey in her recess from her morning lesson. Master Luke had begun to spar with her, although he had yet to draw his blade. Instead he faced her with a stick. _A stick._ She had yet to be able to even land a single strike on him. She marvelled – and a small part of her inwardly fumed dejectedly – that he could fend her off with a few waves of an old length of wood.

 _Is it because of Be-?_ Rey wondered and then, catching herself she corrected it.

 _Ren…_ she growled quietly in frustration as she caught herself thinking of him again. She had been thinking of him more and more as the visions continued - the paradox of the boy he had _been_ and the man he had _become_. So, her new friend coming to spend her break with her, came as a welcome diversion from her ruminations.

BB-8 was trundling obscured within the waist-length grass at the edges of the field, unintelligible whistles and whirrs emanating every now and then. Poe had brought her up some food and water - simple bread and cheese - but Rey had found it delicious as she’d eaten it, whilst he’d merely picked at his own.

 _He’s thoughtful_ , she thought, as she watched him out of the corner of her eye. Poe had begun to fill her in about his visits to Finn, sometimes with BB and sometimes on his own. How he would read to Finn a story that his mother had read to him as a child. He told her how he’d felt guilty when he realised that Finn probably didn’t have _anyone_ to care for him - _didn’t have parents_ \- and if he had, that he wouldn’t _know_ who they were, because of what the First Order had done to him. Rey felt an admiration for Poe at that, for his compassion for Finn. His caring nature, despite his brash outer appearance. She found herself growing to like the Poe that she wondered if he only showed others in private – the gentle soul behind the bravado.

“ _So,_ ” he smiled at her, his dark curls bouncing as he tipped his head down to look at where she lay in the grass, “…that kind of brings us up to date.” He flashed her that brilliant smile again.

“I hope he wakes up soon…”, Rey breathed quietly, gazing up at the passing clouds, her hands stretched out on either beside her, fingers playing with the blades of grass they found.

“Yeah…” he replied, a sadness to his voice, “ _me too._ ”

Rey felt the sincerity of his desire for Finn to be well again. Poe couldn’t sense her – he didn’t have the gift, but he was _wonderfully_ open. She heard him shifting from his perch on the rock under the tree and the rustle of the grass as he moved. Glancing at him briefly, she saw him deposit himself next to her, lying slowly backwards to lean back on his arms. She studied his quiet form for a moment, watching his warm dark eyes travelling slowly over the gentle undulations of the grass under the breeze, following the patterns it made.

A loud, squealing whistle broke their peace. BB-8’s antenna and the waving blades of grass were the only thing visible as the small droid rocketed back towards them.

“ _What on earth-”_ he muttered, standing up hurriedly.

 “BB-8?” asked Rey concernedly, sitting up.

The small droid burst from the grass, whizzing past them to hide behind its master’s legs – its trembling head popping out briefly before darting back behind Poe again. A loud cry announced the arrival of one of the small, strange creatures that nested on the cliffs throughout the island, before it flew out of the grass. It looked around for a few moments – BB shivering behind Poe all the while - before it lost interest and moved away.

“Getting into trouble _again_ , buddy?” grinned Poe, as he reached down to pat the round astromech on the head, to comfort it. He was answered by a quiet sound that communicated, _I thought I’d made a friend…_

“That’s a _Porg_ , BB-8,” Rey stated, lacing her tone with kindness, “they’re _normally_ friendly, but it’s nesting season. You must’ve disturbed its babies…”

A low whistle - inflected at the end - seemed to ask, _I did?_

The little droid rotated its downcast head, to look up at her.

Poe and Rey’s eyes met, both bursting into an uncontrollable fit of laughter at their metallic friend. A ping on Poe’s communicator ended it. He glanced down, eyebrows furrowing as he read the message.

“I, uh…” he started, “I gotta go. A briefing’s been called…”

“Oh. Of course,” replied Rey, a pang of disappointment hitting her.

“We’ll talk some more later,” Poe smiled again, as he made to start down the hill, “ _I promise._ ”

Rey felt a ripple through the Force to her, that told her that her Master was looking for her.

‘You should come too’, came Luke’s voice within her mind. Startled at Luke’s new method of communication, Rey jumped up and grabbed her things, running to catch up with Poe as he reached the bottom of the slope to the training field.

“Going my way?” asked Poe – complete with flirtatious wink – and Rey found herself returning his smile as they fell into step together.

After their short walk back down to the settlement, she spotted Master Luke and Leia discussing something outside of the main structure, standing just outside of the doorway.

“Glad to see you two getting to know each other,” beamed Leia, hands clasped in front of her.

“Should we begin?” asked Luke, sparing his sister a glance, her face now with a grim expression.

They met the room full of Resistance members, spread around the central space, and Rey spotted Chewbacca leaning against one of the stone pillars to the rear. He let out a small chuffing noise when he spotted her, so she moved to stand by him. He bumped her affectionately with his arm, prompting her to send him a small smile.

“I know you’re all wondering why we’ve called this briefing,” began Leia, her voice with stately intonation, “approximately two hours ago, communications with our cell in the Dantooine system went _dark._ ”

Rey sensed a pulse of concern echoing around the room, as the various Resistance members glanced to each other.

“At this stage, this could mean anything. We could have interference from a solar flare, or-”

“Or, it could mean _trouble_ ,” raised Poe, eyebrows frowning,

“I’ve contacted command and asked the Admirals to consider sending a small party to investigate,” she replied, meeting his steady gaze an edge of firmness to her voice. Rey could see there was something in Poe’s eyes – not _quite_ a challenge – there. Leia was standing her ground however. “It _could_ mean trouble, as Commander Dameron has raised, but it’s better to _not_ draw attention to ourselves at this time,” she continued.

“ _General-_ ” he shot back - jumping up - body language betraying his agitation.

She stopped him dead with a simple raise of her hand. “We’ve done _more_ than enough drawing attention to ourselves recently, I know.”

Stifled for the moment, Poe sank slowly back into his chair, somewhat deflated.

“ _In the meantime_ , I would ask you all to limit communications to essential contact only, as per our alert protocol,” Leia announced.

The meeting continued for a short time, with Luke sitting largely silent to the rear right-hand side of his sister. He looked lost in thought, as if his mind were somewhere else. Rey wondered if he was sensing the growing unease in the room, as she was. _He must._

The briefing concluding an hour or so later, Rey felt her Master push to her in the Force, beckoning. She moved through the departing crowd, to see what he needed.

“Try _not_ to worry, Rey,” he offered, a small smile below his beard, “I know you’re worried about this ‘bond’ you’re experiencing, but I think I’m getting closer to shedding some light on matters…”

It felt like a weight had lifted from her chest as his words registered with her.

_She might be able to do something about it._

She might _never_ have to see _him_ again.

Rey had broken away after dinner, exhausted after the lengthy day’s training, ever since Luke had begun to _actually_ train her. She was inwardly ecstatic at that though - she finally felt like she was progressing and for the first time in years, she felt like she had a _purpose_. Poe had walked her back to her hut, spending a while talking about some of the worlds he had been to, before he bid her good night. He’d stolen a glance back at her, as he wandered off into the night, sending a flutter in her heart.

 _God,_ she admonished herself in annoyance, _I’ve only spent time around him for a few days…_

She felt so childish. This was just some _stupid_ crush. She’d made fun of those silly little girls that ran around after boys on the rare occasions she encountered them – usually when a larger cruiser had to make a stop on Jakku to drop off supplies. _She never imagined she’d be one herself. A crush,_ Rey told herself as she changed out of her clothes and into her nightwear, _-that’s all this is._

Changing out of her clothing thereafter, trying to clear her mind, she was fast asleep almost as soon as her back hit the soft cushioning of her cot.

                                                                             

* * *

 

 

Rey was _herself_ this time.

The last time it had happened, she fought _him_.

She was standing alone in a field that stretched into the horizon, but the ground was dried and cracked. _Ashen._ Only scarce, desiccated remains of what was once vegetation littered the area on the slope on which she found herself standing. It wasn’t like Jakku, but it wasn’t like Ahch-To either. Blackened marks seemed to dot the earth at irregular intervals all around her and into the distance - like it had been burnt.

Instinctively pushing out with the Force to try to sense her surroundings further than her eyes could see – as Luke had taught her - Rey could not sense anything to be wary of, but her fingers still reached for her belt, reassuring her when they were met by the cold metal of her lightsaber hilt. Deciding to walk up the slope, the only sound she could hear was a whistling breeze and the soft padding of her boots on the earth – which were also the only things that _did_ remind her of Jakku.

Eventually reaching the top, the hill sloped down abruptly at a strange geometry - _much_ steeper than the one she had just climbed. A burning flicker across the ground caught her eye and she looked down. Strange, glowing red markings circled and jumped across the earth in an endless string above the surface of the ground. Looking back up, Rey noted now that they seemed to continue along the slope - drawing away into the haze her eyes couldn’t focus on, far off from where she stood – the slope looked to ring the space below. The ground was bone-white here, with no evidence of past life.

_Nothing._

Except for a tall – broken - _blackened_ shape which twisted up from the ground in the middle of the large flattened plain that continued on as far as her eyes could see, at the bottom of the slope from where she was.

It was eerily quiet. No signs of settlement. _Of life._

 _Where is this?_ Rey wondered, alone.

Trying to centre herself and push down her growing apprehension, she concentrated for a few moments. Focusing on feeling around herself with the Force and sensing nothing, she felt out further with the Force. _Still nothing._

Deciding to try walking towards whatever the shape she could see in the distance was, Rey began trudging slowly down the hill, watching her footing as she went.

She felt the strange sensation that she _wasn’t_ getting closer and she had _no_ idea how far away it was - not without a scope.

Rey noted as she continued to plod on, that there was a strange light in this place. The sun looked almost ghostly – silver coloured clouds diffusing the light’s dull rays. The light here seemed muted.

 _Dead,_ she thought, a shiver brushing across her skin at the realisation.

 _No heat is in the air,_ she noted, _it definitely feels cold._

Not icy like on Starkiller - or late at night in the desert - but still unpleasant. She realised it grew colder the further she walked. Rey only realised she was making progress, when she turned to look back towards the slope she had climbed down and saw her footsteps stretching off into the distance behind her.

 _What is this place?_ She pondered to herself.

Rey walked for what felt like hours. The shape she had seen seemed to _finally_ be getting closer. _Slowly._ The nearer she got, the more she could begin to make out. It looked organic - whatever it is. _Nothing_ artificial formed like that, unless designed, she remembered – but remembered from where eluded her. Was it her own memory, or the young Jedi she seemed to inhabit in her dreams – Rey couldn’t be sure. Everything seemed… _fuzzy…_ to her at the moment.

Continuing her trek, she observed that the shape looked like it had branches. _That it looked like-_

Rey stopped dead. Her feet slid in the dirt at the immediacy of it.

 _A tree - like the one in my dreams!_ she blinked.

Studying it for a few moments, Rey resumed her stride, but at a much slower pace. She noticed that the ground here grew much darker and seemed to turn pitch black the closer she got to it, like it had been scorched. She felt something, akin to a soft hum, from the dead tree. Reaching her hand out tentatively, she felt the rough carbon-black bark below her fingers, stroking it gently as she circled round it.

_If this dream was trying to show her something, she wanted to know what it was._

Completing her orbit, Rey stopped, resting her hand on the bark for a few moments.

The light began to grow darker, as if the sun was beginning to set.

She heard a soft rustling and her eyes snapped up to catch sight of the bark beginning to fall away like torn paper below her hand, a soft blue glow emanating from within the tree as it did. She jumped back with a start, watching it cautiously.

The bark continued to fade, whilst the glow grew stronger. Rey began to have to shield her eyes, because of the brightness.

Rey could now see a shape within. Like a person, suspended in the air, just above the ground.

_She froze._

The last of the bark vanished – like leaved blown away by the wind - and the person gently touched the ground, their lustrous dark hair falling to cover their pale face. They were male and tall, from what she could see. Broad-shouldered and dressed in silver-grey robes, with brown leather boots.

_Like a Jedi._

_Who are you?_ Rey wondered.

As if hearing her, the figure seemed to awaken, looking around slowly until their eyes locked on her.

The glow in the air around them faded.

Rey fell backwards – startled - when she saw the face looking back at her in the dying light.

Their hazel gaze softened, an amiable smile spreading on their features.

“I was wondering when you would find me, Rey…” their deep, rich voice announced.

She couldn’t believe who stood before her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slight tweaks to this chapter – particularly to Kylo’s section and some of the description of the plain Rey finds herself in.
> 
> Sidenote – I’ve been reading the newly released volume 9 of Saga. Oh my gosh… If anyone hasn’t read this series yet – go out and get it read. It’s so good. So many twists and turns!
> 
> I've used a couple of tracks whilst writing this: -
> 
> 'The Devil Whispered in His Ear' - Austin Wintory - Kylo's commune with Grandfather.
> 
> 'Vale of Plenty' - Hans Zimmer - Poe, Rey and BB-8 enjoying their quiet moments above the training field.
> 
> 'Nascence' - Austin Wintory - Rey is transported to the plain for the first time (1:20 she reaches the top of the hill and begins her trek down).
> 
> 'The Call' - Austin Wintory - From when Rey starts to feel the hum; 0:19 Rey reaches out to touch it; 0:58 the shape within is visible and from 2:29 is when the person she's freed speaks...
> 
> Thanks again to everyone who’s reading this and to all those of you who've left kudos/bookmarked/subscribed - I really appreciate it! If you’re out there, please let me know if you've been enjoying the story :)


	9. A Beacon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey’s newest encounter grows stranger, leaving her with more questions. 
> 
> Poe has a late-night heart-to-heart with Rey. 
> 
> The First Order operation gets underway.

“I was wondering _when_ you would find me, Rey…”

Every fibre of her being told her to run, to put as much distance as possible between her and the – _whatever_ – _whoever_ \- on earth it was, that stood before her.

She didn’t understand if this was real.

 _How can it be?_ Rey thought to herself, dumbfoundedly.

She couldn't tell if what – _who_ \- stood before her was just some apparition, or vision. A trick of her mind. _Or worse_.

“Don’t you _recognise_ me?” they asked, voice low and gentle.

Her soul told her to stay. Rey was frozen in awe.

 _He can’t be here... He’s gone,_ she told herself.

“You’re _not_ real,” she croaked out - half to assure herself that she really was witnessing this and half to see his response.

He looked the same age as - as _him_.

 _He couldn’t be real... he can’t be_ , Rey repeated to herself internally, her incredulity plain on her face. Her eyes crinkled in confusion as she began to move back, feet readying for flight if it came to it.

“ _I am_ ,” he stated simply, looking down at the dust below him, his eyebrows knitted together. He seemed to be confused – or at least unsure of how to proceed – his face held an expression of deliberating with himself what to say.

Rey’s curiosity was piqued, though.

This was a dream, _her_ dream.

So why was this – _ghost_ – appearing to her, outside of the past?

Tentatively, she reached out towards him, her hand trembling. Rey paused for a moment, half-closing her hand, before reaching out again. She jolted softly at the feeling of the warmth of his skin.

 _Not a ghost then_ , she mused.

He was torn from his thoughts when he felt her touch.

His eyes widened momentarily, before looking up at her through thick black lashes. As she stood nearer him, she could now see the honey-gold corona to his eyes as they watched her intently - unsure how to react to the contact. She snatched her hand back when she realised that she was still touching him, her skin flushing in embarrassment.

 _Should I be embarrassed?_ she wondered inwardly, _he says he’s real, but that could just be part of… this._

He straightened then, taking a small step closer to Rey.

“Don’t be afraid,” he said, trying to muster a small grin. With a kind expression on his face, he took a breath before continuing, “I _am_ real…”

Rey blinked at him with scepticism.

“I know that must be difficult for you to believe,” he began, his eyes growing intense in their gaze, “-but I’m here standing before you, as plain as day...”

Rey continued to stare at him, disbelief clouding her features.

“ _You must sense me?_ ” he pressed, his brow creasing as her look of distrust persisted.

“ _Why_ are you here? _Where is this?_ ” Rey blurted out, a look of questioning and uncertainty in her eyes.

She _could_ sense a presence but she was still trying to piece together what it was. It felt almost soothing – _reserved_ \- but it released enough of a pulse to let her know it was there and that it was not hostile.

Her instincts began to calm after that.

He _seemed_ to mean her no harm, but she couldn’t let her guard down fully. _Not yet._

“ _This,_ ” his warm baritone began, as he turned to look around the barren wasteland around them, “-this has been my prison, for so long. _Empty…”_  hisexpression grew downcast, head bowing slightly as he turned to her again, “…and _alone._ ”

Rey was disarmed by this revelation, unable to stop the tilt of her head as she processed what he had just said.

“ _I felt you,_ ” he murmured, after a few moments of silence from her, “-like a beacon of light.”

Her eyes softened at his confession - briefly – then regained their previous wariness.

“It grew stronger each day after _that_ ,” he continued, his eyes fixing on her once more.

Rey wondered if he meant after Takodana.

“I didn’t know how to reach out to you then…” he continued, voice trailing off and warm eyes dipping down to his feet before returning to her again, “-but I’m glad I eventually _could_ ,” he smiled brightly.

“I don’t understan-” Rey started, craning her neck slightly to look up at him.

“We don’t have much time-” he cut her off, coming to stand directly in front of her. A deep sadness flickered across his features, his head tipping and causing his hair to fall around his face. “Just _know_ that I will be here. You’ve found me, and you can find me again,” he told her, holding her gaze with an encouraging look.

“What do you _mean?_ _Who_ are _you?_ ” she asked, watching as he gave her a sad smile and began to turn and walk away towards where the dead tree had stood, his head shaking lightly.

He turned briefly to look at her over his shoulder, his gaze warm.

“ _I’m Ben, Rey,_ ” he smiled softly.

She could not mask her surprise.

Throwing her another small smile, he looked at her again, “ _It was nice to finally meet you…_ ”

“Wait! I don’t understand!” Rey shouted after him.

“You’ll find me again, Rey. I _know_ you will…” he threw her a handsome, lopsided grin and met her gaze for a final time before a sudden wind kicked up, blasting her with sand. Rey brought her arms up to shield her eyes, watching for as long as she could through the gap between them, as he drifted away with an ash-like flurry.

She stood there, staring at where he had vanished, long after.

_Ben…_

                                                                               

* * *

 

 

Poe had been pacing all night, ever since the briefing - he was itching to do _something._ His faithful little companion’s head swung from side-to-side as it watched him, his boots padding backwards and forwards on the stone floor. He slowly ran both of his hands exasperatedly through his black curls, letting out a loud sigh as he did.

“What do we _do_ , little guy?” he muttered, turning his head to look at the astromech as it rocked slowly back and forth, his eyes creasing in frustration as he slumped onto the cot. The gentle whirr his ears caught in his silent chamber, alerted him to the small droid wheeling across the room slowly. It bumped his leg gently with its head, a sad little whistle seeming to say _‘I don’t know…’_

He patted BB’s head affectionately, as it turned its large black optic up to its friend.

Poe had a _bad_ feeling about this - about losing contact with Dantooine. Try as he might, he hadn’t been able to shake it.

Although, he acknowledged that the most at peace that he had felt recently, was the time he had spent getting to know Rey. It was _genuinely_ nice to talk to someone as close to Finn as he was. _That cared._

The longer he sat there, Poe realised he didn’t feel like he’d get sleep - _even if he tried_.

 _Maybe she’d still be awake_ , he thought, staring at the wall.

He didn’t _want_ to disturb her, but he couldn’t sit here not doing… _anything_.

Poe sat for a while longer, before he finally got the courage to leave. Stopping at the door to grab his jacket and his holstered blaster, he heard a puzzled ‘whoop’ from BB-8, as he pulled them on.

“Come on BB, let’s go for a walk,” he smiled, as he moved aside of the door to let the astromech roll out in front of him.

Poe decided he’d take a walk in the direction of Rey’s hut and that if he could see her light still on, that meant she’d probably still be awake. _If not_ , he’d still go for a walk, to try and settle himself. It was cooler in the night, so he was glad he’d grabbed his jacket, shoving his hands into his pockets as he set off.

He strolled up the path towards Rey’s hut, his small spherical companion rolling along behind him.

Poe’s heart bounced when he began to draw closer, making out light filtering out of her still-open window. Stepping up to the door, his hand hovered in front of it for a moment, BB-8 turning its head up to watch him. He gently rapped on the wood, anxious about whether he’d be waking her up.

So, it came as some surprise, when Rey abruptly pulled open the door. Puzzlement on her face for only a second, she immediately flashed him a bright smile before beckoning both of her visitors in.

“I was already up,” she explained, clearing some things off of her bed and away, slightly embarrassed at the mess her room was in.

Poe smiled, sheepishly – earning him a head-swivel in response from BB, who said _nothing_.

“I wasn’t _expecting_ visitors,” Rey continued, casting Poe a glance over her shoulder as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

“I – uh – _Yeah,_ I can see that,” he laughed, still standing by the door.

“What can I help you with?” Rey asked, standing back up as she moved to some folded clothes. She caught sight of BB-8 rolling its head up to its master, urging him to provide some form of answer for their unexpected visit.

“Heh,” Poe breathed, “I was, uh – _well_ – I couldn’t sleep,” he admitted, an anxious edge to his voice as he met her eyes.

Rey didn’t miss the little head-twitch of his droid that seemed to suggest _‘really?’._

“Anything in particular that’s _bothering_ you?” she pressed, concern bleeding into her tone. Rey was used to not being able to sleep when something was bothering her - her nightly encounters having frequently disturbed it.

“I’m worried about Dantooine…” he answered, leaning back on the stone wall and folding his arms. “We had an operation there and a few of my friends are attached to it. Losing contact with them, it’s just so-”

“ _I’m sorry…_ ” Rey responded, trying her best to show compassion.

She _knew_ what it was like to be worried about a friend.

There wasn’t a day went by where she _hadn’t_ thought about Finn. She knew Poe understood that though - they had been bonding over it the last few days.

She was, however, surprised about how caring Poe was and the _genuine_ interest he had begun to show in _her_ the more time that they had begun to spend together during his stay.

“We’re at _war_ ,” he sighed, glancing up at her briefly. “It’s just getting harder and harder to _not s_ ee everyone make it back each time,” he confessed earnestly, “I know that sounds stupid - but I used to believe it -that when the _good_ guys _won_ , they _always_ made it,” Poe continued - a defeated tinge to his tone.

“I’m sure it’s nothing,” Rey murmured, wanting to bring him some degree of comfort and hoping that it had made it into her voice, “You heard Leia. It’s probably just some interference or some equipment that blew… Force knows it’s not the first time one of our antennas has been fried in an electrical storm,” she offered, trying to reassure her friend.

“ _Maybe,_ ” Poe replied – his mouth quirking slightly to show he didn’t _quite_ believe that, “Maybe… but I have a _bad_ feeling about it...”

Rey wasn’t sure how to lift his spirits, so instead she decided to just _listen_.

“If it had been an equipment failure, we would have _heard_ by now,” Poe continued, “ _someone_ would have checked in. I mean we’ve got backups for backups, for kriff’s sake…”

Rey didn’t know what to say to that.

He was obviously agitated about the situation. Without even needing to sense the jolting frustration from him, she could see it clearly in his unhappy body language.

“ _I just-_ I don’t know what to do,” he huffed, “Leia doesn’t want to seem to do _anything_ that might put us in harm’s way, which is _bizarre_ considering I almost had to have her ship grounded when she announced she wanted to come here _alone..._ ”

“She must have her reasons, Poe,” Rey smiled, mustering as much sincerity as she could as she tried to let him know she understood where he was coming from.

It seemed that _both_ Skywalker siblings could be withholding at times.

“She’s been shutting me out since Starkiller…” Poe growled, new emotion – pain – entering his tone, “ _that bastard ripped her heart out!_ Took _everything_ from her…” he spat, flaring in anger.

Rey jumped a little at his sudden outburst - but on realising it was obviously a sore point - she waited to see if he would say anything else, first.

“She’s not been the _same_ since - she’s withdrawn - she’s become over-cautious,” he grumbled, exasperatedly.

Rey had never seen Poe like this.

Admittedly, she had only met him a few days prior and was only _starting_ to feel like she was getting to know him. It still struck her as sad though, to see someone she knew as being normally so playful and jovial, instead  beung so agitated and frustrated.

Before Rey really knew _what_ she was doing, she had crossed the space and wrapped her arms around him, bringing him into a deep hug. He stiffened for a moment, as if unsure whether to return it or not. She moved to pull away, but Poe pulled her back in, the embrace tighter than the one she had given him.

“ _Thank you…_ ” he whispered, his voice cracking ever-so-slightly with the weight of his troubles.

“It’ll be okay,” she replied, hoping that the smile on her face had reached her voice.

Releasing her slightly, Poe slid his hands up to rest on her shoulders.

“You wanna tell me why _you_ were still up?” he asked after a moment, his dark eyes questioning.

“ _I-,_ ” Rey had barely been able to tell Master Luke. How on _earth_ could she explain what was happening to her, to Poe?

“It’s okay if it’s not something you want to talk about… I just wanted you to know that I’m here if you _do_ , _”_ he beamed warmly, squeezing her shoulders gently.

Deciding that she felt she could trust him - enough to tell him at least _part_ of what’s been going on - Rey took a breath to steady herself. _To order her thoughts._

“Well… I’ve been having these _dreams,_ ” she started, looking down at the floor as her loose hair fell in a cascade around her face.

Poe blinked in surprise - he hadn’t particularly noticed how long her hair _was_ until that moment.

It was lustrous and a deep chocolate colour. He decided after a moment that he preferred it this way. _Unbound._

“They’ve been waking me up most nights since I was taken prisoner by Kylo Ren… at Takodana…” Rey continued, her eyes turning up to his.

Poe’s face seemed to harden at the mention of the dread Knight’s name.

Rey remembered then when Finn had told her about how he’d met Poe - how Poe been taken prisoner and _interrogated_. _Like her._ She had a flashback to her own interrogation - to when Ren had revealed his face – to the face she’d seen worn by another. _One who seemed so sad._ And _pure_ \- despite it all.

“What… _happens_ in these dreams, Rey?” Poe asked, his concern flashing in his eyes as he leant towards her.

“ _I-_ ,” the words catch in her throat.

He’s _so_ close and his gaze seemed to run over her - checking whether she was okay.

Rey realised then that his hands were still on her shoulders, loosely clasping them. Poe seemed to realise too, a moment after.

“Uh, _sorry…_ ” he muttered bashfully all of a sudden, throwing her a crooked smile, before he removed his hands and moved back to rest against the wall again, shoving them back into his pockets and staring fixedly at the floor. He didn’t _dare_ look up now.

“It’s okay,” she offered, kindness in her voice. “They, _um -_ stars – where to begin?” she mumbled exasperatedly, rubbing her head with her hand.

“We don’t _have_ to do this, Rey-,” Poe hushed softly, looking to her for some sign of what she wanted to _do_ , his eyes never leaving hers. He gulped - the tension in the room becoming stifling.

“No, no - _I just_ , it’s just that…” she tried, but she just couldn’t seem to get the words out. He was watching her so _strangely_ , it caused her mind to race.

“It’s okay, Rey, _I understand,_ ” he responded, his smile fleeting.

She waited for him to continue, intrigued by this new piece of information.

“I haven’t been sleeping well since I was taken prisoner _either…_ ” Poe’s eyes grew distant, grew _cold_. She sensed relief there too – wavering. Rey was used to his easy warmth - to the playful mischief so often in his eyes. She sensed him fold in on himself then, felt him _withdraw_.

“I _see_ Kylo Ren - _I’ve spoken to him_ \- I’ve _fought_ with him,” she spluttered, unable to contain the words any longer and had not fully shared with her Master.

Poe’s head whipped up her confession, his eyes wide.

“ _You’ve spoken to him?_ ” he asked, a tremor of deep emotion in his voice.

“I’ve seen him as Kylo Ren…” Rey replied, sympathising with the dawning look of bemusement on Poe’s face, “-and I’ve seen the person who he was _before_ ,” she continued. 

 _...Who he could still be,_ she thought to herself, silently.

Poe didn’t respond, watching her quietly instead.

“I don’t know _how_ , and I don’t know what _any_ of it _means_ ,” she breathed, shoulders sagging but lighter from the relief of their burden.

Poe’s mouth opened and closed - as if he couldn’t get the words to his question right. His eyes darted to her and away again, several times, like he was trying to weigh the magnitude of what she had just said.

“…But I think the Force _wants_ me to see it, for some _kriffing_ unknown reason…” Rey grumbled, beginning to pace away from him, her hands gesturing in frustration.

“How do you know this isn’t some _trick_ of _his?_ ” asked Poe once she had finished speaking – his eyes suddenly sharp and his body bristling.

Rey could only imagine what Poe had been put through during his interrogation, but she knew he wasn’t Force sensitive, so he wouldn’t have been able to defend himself the way she had. She felt a twinge of pity near her heart when she saw the flicker of anxiety across his face.

“ _I don’t…_ ” she replied, attempting to keep her tone even, to try and calm him down.

Trying to steer the conversation away from Kylo Ren, she switched tack.

“I don’t, _but I met-_ ” she began, her voice small.

Poe watched her, expectantly. He was having a hard-enough time trying to fathom what she’d just told him – something she hadn’t even told Master Luke.

“-But then I _met_ Ben Solo,” she exhaled, her body shaking with the relief of having _finally_ told someone the full truth.

Poe’s only reaction was to contort his face in a look of complete scepticism.

The room had fallen silent.

Even BB-8 had ceased its usual fidgeting, sensing the growing unease of the man next to it.

“You _met_ Ben Solo,” repeated Poe, his voice laced with concern.

“I don’t get it either, Poe,” Rey sighed, raising her hands in defeat upon meeting his increasingly unsettled expression, “I don’t know what to do and-”

Stilling himself, he seemed to settle for a moment, realising that _no-one_ would know what to do in that situation. _Especially him._

“We’ll figure it out, Rey,” Poe announced - the warm expression that he usually wore - finally returning.

Her heart fluttered. _Relieved._ Part of her felt selfish for feeling such elation, but it felt _so_ good having finally shared this all with someone.

“I don’t _know_ what to _do_ and you’re the _only_ person I’ve told about _all_ of this,” she admitted, sinking to her bed.

“Hey, _hey_ \- _it’ll be okay_ , Rey,” Poe soothed, “-we’ll figure _something_ out,” he offered - pushing up and off from the wall and beginning to cross towards her.

“That’s just it, Poe,” she said quietly, her head tilted away from him towards the opposite wall, “I don’t think even Master Luke has been able to find the answer to what this thing happening to me _is_ yet...”

“Hey,” he said quietly, sinking on to her bed next to her, “-if _anyone’ll_ be able to figure it out, it’ll be a Jedi Master. _Have some faith,_ ” he smiled briefly, reaching his hand to gently tilt her head towards him.

Rey’s breath hitched in her throat when she saw the look of pure compassion in his eyes – _unflinching_ in its conviction. He was so _very_ close, their noses almost touching with the proximity. His eyes seemed to be looking to hers for guidance.

She felt herself beginning to burn under his gaze, her heart pounding.

Just as he edged closer, lips parting almost imperceptibly, BB-8 bumped her leg – as if nuzzling it. It snapped them both out of whatever had been about to happen. She beamed down at the little droid, Poe letting out a low chuckle at its action.

“Guess you wanted to let Rey know it’d be okay too, huh buddy?” he smirked down at his small rotund companion.

The round astromech let out a short series of whoops and a flanging whistle - which Rey couldn’t _quite_ discern - looking to Poe for input.

“ _Oh!_ Uh…” he smiled nervously, “BB says you have a pretty smile and that you shouldn’t be sad...”

“Thank-you, BB,” Rey responded, grinning more widely and reaching down to rest her hand on the droid’s head, receiving happy beeps in response.

“I – uh - I’d have to agree with the little guy,” Poe grinned, rubbing the back of his neck again.

“ _Thank-you,_ Poe,” she giggled - that wonderful laugh letting him know that he’d helped her to return to a more cheerful mood and prompting a swell of pride in his chest.

“ _It’s nothing,_ ” he seemed to blush, the words sounding choked as he tried to stifle it.

“I mean it though,” Rey beamed, giving him a small peck on the cheek.

Poe blinked back at her, a dazed grin spreading on his face.

                                                                             

* * *

 

 

Kylo was struck with a strange sense of elation - mid-march to the flight deck - en route to join Phasma for the ground assault on the suspected Resistance base.

_It felt so alien._

_Where had this feeling come from?_ he wondered silently – eventually realising that he hadn’t felt a feeling like it since Starkiller, _when she had realised the traitor was still alive._

Trying to shake it off, Kylo continued striding towards the flight deck - the sleek black lines of his Mynock-winged command shuttle coming into view. He nodded curtly to the two Stormtroopers standing guard at the bottom of the ramp, letting them know to begin preparing for take-off.

Boots pounding up the ramp, he felt another twinge of warmth in his chest and slammed a hand against the bulkhead to the rear of the cockpit to, brace himself.

 _What in hell is this?_ he growled inwardly, swallowing heavily as the sensation continued to spread.

“ _Sir?_ ” asked one of the troopers, swivelling round in their chair to see his tremoring form.

“ _Get back to your station!_ ” he managed to roar, “-and get us _off_ this Star Destroyer, _now!_ ”

The trooper whipped back around without another word, hastily retracting the ramp and releasing the docking couplings. The ship lifted off smoothly and cleared the flight deck, immediately tearing off towards the surface of Dantooine. Kylo caught sight of it, looming in the distance.

He supposed it was fitting - that _this_ was the base that his Mother had once told Grandfather was where the Rebels were hiding - despite that not being the case at the time. _It was now._

Kylo thought it was also fitting that _he_ would be leading the First Order to wipe the Resistance presence out.

He also wondered if the _girl_ would be there.

_He hoped she would._

He felt a bolt of electric exhilaration at the thought.

_If she was here, he would find her._

He wanted to.

_So badly..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank-you to everyone who's been reading so far and a big shout out to everyone who's been leaving feedback so far - thank-you all! Please – if you’ve been enjoying this story – drop me a line in the comments. Kudos/subs/bookmarks are also appreciated.
> 
> An expanded chapter from the original, with a bit more internal monologue and viewpoints shown. 
> 
> Sidenote – If anyone’s looking for something to watch, A Discovery of Witches is really growing on me after the 2nd episode. 
> 
> I've used a couple of tracks whilst writing this: -
> 
> ‘Second Confluence'- Austin Wintory - Ben and Rey finally meet
> 
> 'The Right Things' - Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross - Poe and Rey's heart to heart
> 
> ‘A Curse of Ghosts’ – Kylo begins to feel things he shouldn’t be able to feel.


	10. A Fragment of Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and Phasma investigate the Resistance base at Dantooine. 
> 
> Rey and Luke continue training, but things take a turn for the worse. 
> 
> The bond between Rey and Kylo grows stranger. 
> 
> Rey manages to make it back to the wasteland again.

As they had approached the Resistance base on Dantooine, Kylo had once again thought of his mother. She must _know_ what he had done to his father - _to her husband._

 _Does she hate me?_ He found himself wondering quietly.

As he looked out of the viewport ahead of him into the starfield beyond the looming planet, he could remember staring out at a similar, more peaceful scene as a young child. He had been waiting in his mother’s chambers - for her to return from a senate meeting - long bored from playing with the games she had left him. His face had been pressed almost against the glass – his nose _just_ grazing the surface, hands pressed flat against the cool screen.

He was deep in concentration – trying to spot every single constellation his father had shown him here – so _completely_ and _deeply_ engrossed, that he hadn’t heard the silent ‘hush’ of the door as it had slid open.

“Having fun without me, _little prince?_ ” Leia had asked, a playful tone to her voice as she wandered over to him gracefully.

“Mama!” he had smiled - a bright grin with a missing left tooth spreading on his face – as he had rushed over to wrap his tiny form around her knees.

“Ben…” she had laughed, gentle and beautiful, as she had reached down to wrap her arms around him – her fingers slipping softly into his thick black waves.

“Can we go and get something to eat? _I’m starving…_ ” he had asked, his voice slightly tinged with embarrassment, as he tried to hide his red face in her knees.

“Of course,” his mother had smiled brightly, lowering herself down rest on her calves - at his level, “ _I am too._ ”

He had returned her smile and she had offered her hand to him with a soft smirk on her face. He remembered he had _loved_ holding her hands as a child.

 

* * *

 

 

Kylo cast a glance down at the gloved hand which now lay useless by his side. He could feel the alien moisture which tugged at the corners of his eyes. Deciding to push the sensation clawing at his heart deep inside himself, he instead turned away and requested a progress report from Phasma.

“Have you managed to secure a landing zone yet, Captain?” Kylo asked, his tone clipped – trying his best to snuff out any emotion that had been in it the moment before.

After a brief hiss of static, her modulated voice rang through – “Landing zone secured. No sign of the Resistance in the vicinity, Lord Ren, although I've sent out a scouting party, ahead to the co-ordinates General Hux provided…”

“ _Excellent, Captain,_ ” he commended, before unkeying the comm.

Kylo then turned his head slightly to regard the pilot of his shuttle, “How long until we arrive?” he demanded, an edge beginning to enter his voice.

“Around ten minutes, sir – we should break the upper atmosphere in 30 seconds and arrive at the LZ in 5 minutes,” the trooper responded, not even breaking their eyecontact from the viewport when they responded.

“ _Good,_ ” he all but growled - marching to the rear of the craft to ready himself - as it shunted and shifted violently until it had made atmospheric entry.

It didn’t taken long for them to reach the landing site - the pilots setting the craft down relatively gently, despite the rough terrain. Kylo strode swiftly down the ramp as it descended, met at its foot by Phasma and a detachment of her fireteam.

“ _Any_ word from the scouting party?” he asked, not bothering to stop as he marched past her – but slowing his gait enough for Phasma to fall into step behind him.

“ _Not yet..._ but they’ll report in as soon as they find _anything,_ Sir,” she replied. Whilst her helmet largely masked the uncertainty she felt surrounding the delay in any form of update from her team, it was not hidden from Kylo's sensitivity in the Force. It nagged and jostled at the corner of his awareness, despite the cool stiffness of Phasma's body language.

They trudged on up the path leading from the ships and trekked into the deep forest in relative silence. Kylo noted that the trees here stretched so high above them that they blocked out the sky entirely with their Conakry. It provided the First Order strike team with excellent cover as they progressed en route. When they were about two miles into their journey there was a sudden roar over the comms, which announced the update that had been awaited.

“ _Flint two-three to Dagger two-five,_ ” came the comm operator’s voice – distorted with whistling interference.

Kylo halted, turning to Phasma and nodding his assent for her to answer, as their escort waited restlessly around them.

“Flint two-three, this is Dagger two-five _actual,_ ” Phasma responded, tilting her head as she waited for their response.

“We’ve located the base – _no signs of activity_ ,” they answered, white noise punctuating the end of their communication.

Phasma shifted almost imperceptibly, her rifle shifting in her hands as she watched Kylo. He nodded curtly for her to answer them.

“Hold your position - _stay out of sight,_ ” she ordered.

“ _Understood_ – over,” the comm operator at the other end responded.

Communication now over and more confident in their odds of success after her team's check-in, Phasma moved up the path to where Kylo began to walk again, closing in on the blinking beacon displayed by the portable holo-emitter he held in front of himself as he reviewed their proximity to the Rebel base.

“ _Sir-_ ” Phasma began, an uncharacteristic unease afflicting her timbre.

Caught slightly off-guard by the difference in her tone, Kylo asked her outright – unable to conceal the irritation her uncertainty had plagued him with, “ _Out with it_ , Phasma, I _don’t_ have _time_ for Hux’s _games…_ ”

“-It’s not _him_ this time, Lord Ren – _I swear_ ,” she muttered, exasperatedly, following after him with a swish of her cape.

“Then _what_ is it?” he grumbled, annoyance spiking its way through his voice, as they marched up the brow of the hill they found themselves now at.

Not a moment later, he sensed a disturbance in the force.

_Familiar. Very familiar._

Narrowing his eyes – although obscured by his mask – Kylo stormed up the hill, eager to get a better view of things. To see if he could pinpoint where this sensation had come from.

 _Not Hux?_ He wondered inwardly, _what could have unsettled Phasma so much…_

Phasma merely sighed – resignedly – and stalked after him with her troopers.

Eventually reaching the summit, Kylo could see the base in the distance. _Phasma’s fireteam had made no error in their assessment,_ he noted. There was _no_ activity. _No sign of the Resistance_ \- none that _he_ could see anyway. Or feel...

“ _Sir-_ ” Phasma tried to reach him, once more – more pressing in her intonation.

“I _don’t_ want to hear it, _Phasma,_ ” he snarled, although this time not directed at her. Instead, it was now the growing sensation emanating from the base he could feel that bothered him. When he realised that he had earned no sign of movement from her, in response, Kylo moved off along a snaking path through the treeline down the ridge towards the base at the foot of the mountain opposite them - a shadow in the night. Phasma squared her shoulders and fell into lockstep with him, with her squad behind her as they followed in silence - ghost-like through the trees. They eventually reached the bottom of the hill and as they drew closer to the outer complex of buildings forming the base, the quiet was eerie. Not even local wildlife – of which they knew there was an abundance - made a sound. There was no smoke, or any sign of a fire-fight. A few external lights were still on, although shut off for a few moments every now and then, as if the power was failing.

Contacting the scouting team, Phasma requested they act as their eyes – using their vantage point to spot any signs of movement while _their_ team picked their way through the surface level of the base – trying to find an entry point. Contacting her ten minutes or so later, the comm operator informed her that one of their snipers had spotted what appeared to be a runway just ahead of where she was stopped with Kylo and that at the end of it there appeared to be a damaged hangar door.

Kylo’s feeling of unease, sank lower into his stomach, the nearer they drew to the runway. It wasn’t intimidation - Kylo reserved that for his Master _alone_. _This feeling which snaked its way through his veins, was something else._ Just then, Phasma signalled for two of her team to proceed ahead, watching from behind an upturned cargo container as they tore off at pace - the rest of the squad monitoring their peripheral from cover - for _any_ sign of movement.

“There’s a door, Captain – just as Flint two-three reported, damaged hangar door – bent outwards,” one of the two reported into their comm, as their tiny dot-like forms breached the entrance to the base.

Phasma’s head slowly turned to look at Kylo, upon receiving their update.

“-No sign of scorch marks, or that this was explosive damage – _looks like it’s been ripped open, from the outside…_ ” their voice trailing off, the channel was suddenly disrupted by a sharp burst of static.

Kylo held her gaze. Then the ‘crack’ of blaster fire in the distance reached their ears.

_Ripped open. From the outside._

The fireteam moved out from behind their cover, picking up the pace as they jogged down the runway - scanning their surroundings constantly as they went - an edge beginning to enter each of their movements, even if their emotionless masks hid it relatively well. Kylo had a hard time trying to block their reactions out. 

Faint light filtered outwards from the rended metal door - the landing lights flickering on and off unsettlingly. Then on again.

Nodding to her team, the troopers switched on their lights one by one, moving inside slowly - continuing to scan the environment for any 'surprises'. Once inside, Kylo observed how cavernous the hangar was - hewn out from the belly of the mountain itself. Their bootsteps echoed much more loudly than either Kylo or Phasma would have liked - the lights from their rifles _barely_ illuminating their way. Whatever had happened here, had happened _fast_. _No sign of the troopers they had sent in. Anywhere..._

Kylo couldn’t shake the feeling settling in his stomach. He tried to reach out in the Force - to sense where his eyes could not see - but he found himself _blocked_.

Whatever was here didn’t _want_ to be found.

“ _Captain!_ ” yelled one of the troopers, firing off a burst from their rifle when they spotted a shape _so_ dark that it was like a fragment of night, dart past in the shadows, behind the silver-armoured officer.

“Defensive positions – _now!_ ” barked Phasma, her team immediately forming a tight ring and darting for cover within it, wherever they could find it.

They waited – the heartbeats in-between each breath drawing out further and further – their eyes darting here and there as they watched the blackness within the hangar. How it swallowed up the feeble, pale light of their torch beams with its darkness. 

_No sign of movement._

Yet Kylo's every fibre vibrated in anticipation. _Something_ was out there - _the Force told him so._ His fingers waited - unmoving - above the hilt of his saber. Ready for action. He would not draw his weapon until instinct told him to. Seconds passed – soundlessly - and then the troopers found themselves firing wildly on a terrible, inhuman shape which sped around the outside of their crude defense.

The ends of their rifles were soon either crushed or slashed off, whittling at what little light they had until all that was left was the molten glow of the metal.

“ _Hold your ground!_ ” roared Phasma, her chrome-like armour reflecting the flares from their remaining blasters, urging them to have courage.

Still, Kylo did not draw – but his senses were _alight_ as he waited.

 _There-,_ he thought, sensing the presence which had been stalking them drop in from above, behind him. He spins rapidly, rolling into an evasion of the downward strike of their blade as it carves up the floor plating where he had stood mere seconds before – blood red and crackling.

“You’re getting _slow_ , Kylo Ren…” the assailant laughs, voice modulated.

He grunts as he lands on his feet, whirling on the wiry, charcoal-clad figure. Their visage is mirror-like and accented with chrome and antler-like protrusions on either side. The raw power of his strikes is the only thing forcing them back.

“ _Kabira Ren_ ,” he sneers, as he hacks at them, “ever the sense for the _theatrics…_ ”

 

* * *

 

Rey felt a horrible twisting in her chest, as if her heart was being torn in two.

_Something terrible had happened..._

Distracted, she ended up being caught on the side of her head by Luke’s staff, instead of meeting it with her own.

“ _Again…_ ” he muttered, pacing off to start over, allowing her a few moments to try to regain composure.

She swiped at where she had been hit.

 _No blood,_ she observed.

Luke shook his head - sensing something was off with her - but deciding not to press the matter for now. Shucking off his grey cloak, he moved back to begin again and watched as his student took a few breaths.

Grinding her feet back into a wide stance, Rey swung her staff low, then brought it behind herself -tucking it loosely between her body and inner elbow. Her master smirked back at her briefly, before launching himself forwards, striking at her feet. She jumped up - over the sweeping arc of his staff - landing behind Luke. Spinning in place, she deflected his following jab, narrowly. He was pushing her hard today - obviously _not_ impressed by her earlier lack of concentration. She could feel the protest of her tired muscles, grunting as he connected another blow to the side of her ribs.

“ _Focus,_ Rey!” he roared, annoyance in his tone.

But try as she did, every breath she took just compounded the horrible feeling in her chest.

Shaking herself - she pushed on - rushing him with a flurry of strikes and sending him on the defensive for a change. She noted the look of surprise that flickered across his features - now the one trying to guard. Rey took the opening it had given her, raining down heavy blows, driving him into a retreat. She knew she was expending valuable energy, but to give herself some distance between the two of them, it was worth it.

_But she was tiring._

Luke dodged the next round of blows effortlessly – swatting them aside gently with the end of his staff. He was now using her own energy against her. _Rey knew she was done._

Luke halted his final strike, just before it connected with her cheek, staying it.

“That’s _enough_ for today Rey…” he sighed, breathing heavy.

She huffed out her breath, disappointment palpable.

He offered her an encouraging smile, “You had me _worried_ for a moment there, though,” he chuckled, his cracked laugh ringing in the air.

Rey couldn’t help the slight irritation that smouldered within her at that. Luke had never faced her with a saber yet. _Surely that would make more sense than going through these endless motions with – with sticks,_ she grumbled internally.

It wasn’t as if Ren would meet her staff with a stick...

No, he would attack with his blade – _he always did_. She would forever be on the back foot unless Luke started to accelerate things a bit.

Sensing the agitation of his student, Luke decided now was the time to see if she would open up in terms of what was bothering her, “If you’re not happy with how we’re progressing, Rey, I need you to be honest with me…” he began.

 _Honesty?_  she scoffed, she wasn’t sure that Master Luke had been entirely honest with her - Kylo Ren’s earlier words still burning within her, like poison in her veins…

_…He does tell you everything, does he not?..._

“ _Rey?_ ” Luke pressed, taking a step towards her.

“Why will you not _spar_ with me - _properly?_ ” she whirled on him, anger flashing in her eyes.

“Rey, this isn’t the tim-” he tried to continue.

“Will it _ever_ be?” she snapped, no longer able to stifle the hurt, “you promised you’d teach me – and I, _I believed you!_ ” she yelled, visibly shaking.

“ _Rey,_ it takes time,” Luke answered quietly, trying to calm her. He attempted to reach out to her, hoping that if he could channel a soothing influence towards her, that she would settle more quickly. Instead, Luke was flung back by her powerful, unconscious throw.

Rey stared at him - _horrified_ \- as he lay there, crumpled before her. She stood – trembling - praying for him to move. _For any sign of life._ Breathless moments drifted by.

Luke’s artificial hand twitched - reflexively - as he began stir, but Rey was already gone. _Shame_ compelled her to run - to run far away from here. She raced back down towards the camp, panic screaming at her to grab enough belongings to make a run for it. It was dusk, lending her cover as she made it back to her chambers, managing to avoid bumping into anyone. Without bumping into Leia. _Or Poe._ Tears burned at the corner of her eyes, her heart heavy.

 _She couldn’t believe she had done that._ Her mind drifting back to one of Luke’s earlier lessons  _…Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering…_ Now that she was away from Luke - from Leia, Poe and the others - she could feel it much more clearly. A _terrible_ sensation seemed to creep forward towards her, from every shadow and darkened corner in her chambers. Trying to shake it off, she continued to pack up her bag. The chill in her bones never left her, even once she managed to get her heart-rate under control.

Settling herself onto her bed, she tried to clear her thoughts – to sense if Luke was alright. _If anyone had found him._ She kept herself hidden as best she could, reaching out quietly through the Force - letting out a shivered breath escape her lips when she sensed him - _faintly._

 _He’s alive at least,_ she thought.

_Horror lanced through her. Horror at her own actions._

Reassured slightly, in the knowledge that she hadn’t killed him, Rey tried her best to try and centre herself – to see if she would be able to reach that calm place she had been before all of this. _When she had met Ben._

She focused on trying to tap into the living things around her, the natural cycles - the steady in and out of the waves below. Just as she felt her breathing began to slow and her heart begin to quieten, she felt something else. A presence. _A terrible darkness._

“ _Girl…_ ” ground out the familiar rumble of Kylo Ren’s voice.

She froze. _He couldn’t be here._ He had to be leagues away, at least.

“I _felt_ what you _did_ … He isn’t teaching you, _is he?_ ” he purred, as if his mouth were by her ear.

Rey shivered, her throat dry. Heart racing. Her skin felt like it was _burning_.

“I could teach you, let _me_ show you what _he won’t…_ ” Kylo continued, deep baritone moving to her other ear.

She shuddered, annoyed at the reaction he had provoked from her. She was _not_ some silly little girl.

“ _Cat got your tongue?_ ” he laughed - his cracked laugh a twisted version of the one she had heard from his mother and uncle.

“ _No..._ ” she ground out, barely audible. Her pulse raced, brow beading with sweat. She felt him - his presence at least – a heat pushing at the periphery of her senses. _Blazing._

“He will only hold you back,” he pressed, voice more insistent. “ _I_ can show you the path,” he continued, a twinge of desperation to his voice - as if he were trying to convince _himself_ of what he was saying.

“ _I don’t need you!_ ” Rey shot back, willing every atom within herself to drive him away.

“ _So be it, girl,_ ” he replied, voice sounding almost dejected, “...but you _will_ come around eventually. He’ll only disappoint you. _They all will…_ ” he breathed, his silky, confident voice fading into the sound of the crashing waves against the cliffs.

“ _My name’s not ‘Girl’!"_  Rey seethed. This was getting _far worse_ than she’d ever _imagined_. Now _he_ was _actively_ trying to communicate with her…

She stared out at the sea through her open window, unsure of who she could turn to now...

 _She’d lashed out at her Master in anger._ She wasn’t sure she could come back from that. _If Luke would even have her..._

She sat there – miserable - for hours until she felt exhaustion beginning to tug at her eyes. Deciding that she may as well try and get some rest, Rey moved to close the shutter to her window. Heading back towards her bed, she moved herself down onto it, trying to keep her breathing even – hoping that this would speed up her transition to sleep.

If Kylo Ren was able to reach her, she wondered _who else_ could.

 _She’d already met Ben._ Still, she had sensed no ill will from him - much like his mother, he seemed to be open. _And honest._

After another hour or so, when the stars were high in the sky, Rey finally fell into a slumber. No sound disturbed her.

 

* * *

 

Rey awoke - standing - in bleached, white sand.

 _The plain,_ she thought. Ben filled her mind a moment later. She knew she had to find him – if it even _was_ him.

 _He told me I’d find him again,_ she remembered, willing herself to move. She couldn’t tell which direction was which. Glancing up at the bone white sun, with that ghostly light, she noted that it didn’t seem to move across the sky. _That she wasn’t even casting a shadow._

 _Where is this place?_ she grumbled to herself.

She tried reaching out for him, grasping blindly with the Force, pushing out further and further.

_Nothing._

Taking a breath to try and centre herself, Rey tried again.

_Still nothing._

Despondency began to bleed into her being. She needed guidance from someone. _Anyone._

 _Better the remnant of Ben Solo than that demon of the First Order,_ Rey thought.

Exasperation bubbling within her, she decided to just start walking in the direction she thought she had the last time.

She walked and walked for what felt like hours, trudging through the pale sand. Rey tilted her head back up to gauge the sun, noting that it still didn’t look to have moved. Pacing off once again, she let out an aggravated moan when her footprints seemed to cross themselves.

_She was going in circles._

“ _This is pointless…_ ” she muttered into the air, trying to turn back. Only to walk straight into something decidedly _solid_.

“ _Well, hello there,_ ” came the cheerful, rumbling voice, as Ben’s striking face craned down to look at her.

Rey gulped, feeling her cheeks immediately flush in embarrassment.

“I-,” she began - immediately trying to backpedal - to find some sort of greeting that wouldn’t seem _entirely_ pathetic.

“ _You...,_ ” he offered, watching as she continued to blink at him dumbfounded, before he decided he’d better continue, “…were looking for _me?_ ” he smirked - his roguish smile so strangely familiar.

“I- Yes,” Rey said quietly, looking at him - her hazel-green eyes hidden beneath her lashes. He’d been able to find her, evidently.

“Credit for your thoughts?” Ben smiled again - more softly this time - although it only seemed to deepen the red tinge to her skin.

“You didn’t answer my questions the last time,” she began, finally working up the courage to fix him a straight look. He raised his eyebrows slightly, before settling them into an amused expression. Irrationally, it instantly infuriated Rey, causing her to flare briefly in the Force. His amusement seemed to double when the sensation registered.

“ _Come,_ ” Ben offered, gesturing into the distance with his head, soft dark curls shifting as he did. “I’ll explain what I can…”

She fell into step next to him, struggling to keep up with his much longer strides for a few minutes, until he slowed his pace.

“ _Where are we?_ ” Rey started to interrogate, undeterred after his earlier offer.

“ _Somewhere…_ ” he smirked, glancing down at her briefly.

“Somewh-” she snorted irately, glaring up at him, eyes narrowed in irritation.

Ben merely wore an impish grin in response.

“ _What are you?_ ” she pressed, vexation growing.

“ _I’m Ben,_ ” he replied, raising an eyebrow in confusion – as if her question defied logic.

“You _can’t_ be,” Rey announced matter-of-factly, stopping in her tracks and folding her arms. “Ben Solo is _dead._ ”

He stopped at that, turning around to regard her as if she was the strangest thing he had ever set eyes upon.

“ _Yet here I stand…_ ” Ben fired back, sarcasm lacing his tone as he waved his arms open theatrically.

“ _You’re not a ghost,_ ” Rey stated, incredulous.

“No, Rey, I’m _not_ a ghost,” he answered, rolling his eyes, annoyance beginning to set into his voice.

“Then _what_ are you?” she demanded, marching right up to him, jabbing her finger into his chest.

“ _I already told you,_ ” he sighed, watching her still-prodding finger, “I’m Ben…”

“How do I know you’re _real_ then?” she pushed, her voice raising.

Ben stared at her for a drawn-out minute, his jaw slackening in disbelief.

 _“Really?”_ he muttered, turning back to trudge off again. His increasingly distant footsteps were almost pitch black through the white sand.

“ _Listen, I just want to know what’s going on here!_ ” Rey shouted after him, jogging to catch up with his lengthier strides. Snapping her hand out to catch his wrist, she was surprised when he stopped dead, rounding on her.

“I _wish_ I had answers for you, Rey,” he exhaled, his molten gaze flicking up to meet hers once more. “The truth is - I don’t really know what’s going on here any _more_ than you do…” Ben continued, his face growing downcast.

“ _You must know something?_ ” she entreated, hand now gripping his elbow tightly, prompting him to swing his gaze down to it.

“I-” Ben murmured, “I’m still trying to piece things together myself. Things are – _they’re really mixed up_. Fragmented almost,” he continued.

Rey felt awful for him. _She really did_. If he _was_ real, there was every chance he had no idea of anything that was going on in the outside world. _She hoped he didn’t_. She couldn’t quite tell why initially, but she felt a gentleness from him. Almost a shyness. As if he didn’t want to drive her way by seeming too eager to interact. He was letting _her_ take the lead.

Ben began pacing off again, shaking his head.

Casting her a glance over his broad shoulder, “Are you coming? There’s something I want to show you,” he finished and flashed her a smile that made her breath catch in her throat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Updated to try and clear up the first half of the chapter a bit*
> 
> Can you guess whose roguish smile Ben has?
> 
> Thank-you to everyone who's been reading and to everyone who's been leaving feedback so far - thank-you all! Please – if you’ve been enjoying this story – drop me a line in the comments. Kudos/subs/bookmarks are also appreciated.
> 
> This chapter has seen the greatest revision, with a largely superfluous section in the original removed and replaced with what I *hope* is an improvement.
> 
> Sidenote – If anyone’s looking for something to watch, Bodyguard on the BBC was a great watch – binged the whole series today - sooooo gripping.
> 
> I've used a couple of tracks whilst writing this: -  
> ‘Facehugger’, Jerry Goldsmith – I felt this had the unsettling and creepy tone I was going with for Kabira’s introduction.
> 
> ‘To Know Water', Austin Wintory – I felt this had a sort of ethereal, time-skip, quality to it that leant itself to the memory Kylo has of Leia and his younger self.
> 
> ‘Forest of Dreams' - Chris Tilton - Rey lashes out at Luke in anger and then flees, ashamed, leading to Kylo reaching out for her.
> 
> 'Second Confluence' & 'Threshold' - Austin Wintory - Rey & Ben meet again.


	11. Ember

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia finds her fallen brother.
> 
> Rey and Ben continue on their journey and encounter a dark force.
> 
> Kylo faces off against his attacker.

Leia came across Luke laying on the ground, face-down, groaning. She’d come as quickly as she could, sensing the spike of pressure in the Force - _of blind anger_. It had been so scarily _familiar_. _So similar_ in sensation to _that_ day. Moving to her brother, her silvering brows creased as she tried to gently move him into his side, brushing his greyed hair off his forehead.

“What happened, Luke - where’s Rey?” she murmured softly, lips pursing with worry.

“Unnhh… She didn’t mean t-” he grimaced in answer, raising himself slowly on his false hand.

Her warm brown eyes watched him carefully as he tried to catch his breath, a few loose strands falling from her elegantly styled hair as she helped to steady him.

“What do you mean she didn’t _mean_ to?” Leia asked, a concerned edge in her voice.

“She just winded me is all… I don’t even think she _realised_ she could do it _without_ thinking…” he muttered to himself, unaware of the look which passed across his twin’s face.

“I think she more than _winded_ you, Luke - this is too similar to before…” Leia mused, clearing the rich purple velvet cloak off of her offered shoulder as she helped him to stand. They shared a knowing look.

“I _know_ what you’re thinking,” wheezed Luke, as she raised him to his feet, “-that I’m that same, _stubborn_ old man who _didn’t_ learn his lesson the first time…”

Leia didn’t respond, merely curving one of her sculpted brows in response.

“I know where she’s gone…” Luke continued, unperturbed by her bemused expression, “-she’ll be back soon enough, when she realises I haven’t given up on her. She isn’t like _him,_ you know...”

“I’m _counting_ on her _not_ being,” smiled Leia, as they began to slowly walk down to the settlement, Luke hobbling his way down sideways.

“You’re _sure_ about this?” he asked, catching on to the meaning of her words, his peppered eyebrow arching.

“ _Positive._ She’s our _best_ hope,” his twin smiled back brightly - prompting Luke to return one of his own.

“There’s something _else_ though… you know, you’re not very good at hiding things,” he sighed, exhaling shakily and pulling his grey robes closer around himself.

“ _Dantooine base is gone,_ ” Leia said quietly, her smile long-faded from her eyes. “He was _there_ , Luke. _I felt him._ For the first time in a long time…” she continued, her regal voice now sounding so very small.

“There _has_ to be a reason for it, Leia,” he replied, catching her watching him out of the corner of her eye while they continued to climb the path back down to the settlement. “Rey seemed distracted today - the worst I’ve seen since before our talk - _you don’t think…_ ” Luke trailed off as the realisation set in.

His fears confirmed by his sister’s tilted head, the old Jedi Master swiped a hand over his face. “ _I’ve got more reading to do…_ ” he sighed.

“I think _reading_ is the least of our worries, Luke,” Leia retorted, head shaking, “-do what you must, but you might want to try actually _talking_ to her,” she sighed, reaching with her ornately-bangled arm to adjust his arm across her shoulder as they made it to the last few steps down. The stone made way here for a worn gravel path - edged either side with mossy grass - as it wound its way round the inner edge of the cliff, back towards the cluster of stone huts at their encampment.

A few members of the Resistance were congregated outside of the main hut, obviously waiting for Leia’s return. Commander Dameron stood with his back to them as they approached, deep in frenzied conversation about _something -_ until his colleagues began to pull faces ranging from mild concern to wincing - as their General carried her injured brother back to his hut. He caught Leia’s eye, but said nothing as she shuffled past him, Luke grunting with discomfort with each step they took – clearly worse off than he admitted. Depositing her brother in his cot, with little more than an ‘I’ll be fine’ for reassurance, Leia steeled herself before she left his chambers. She knew the moment she stepped out, she would be the General again – not Leia Organa-Solo.

As soon as she stepped outside, she was met with Poe’s immediate protests.

“General! We can’t _sit here_ anymore, we _have_ to do _something!_ ” He exclaimed, appearing in front of her, “The casualty reports keep coming in – it’s not just Dantooine base anymore!”

“Poe…” Leia began, drawing in a breath in exasperation.

“-The First Order are systematically hunting down every, last _one_ of us in that system - everyone who managed to escape - it’s… it’s only a matter of time…” he continued, frustration plain in his voice and his eyes intense with the need to do something. _For action._

“Poe- Commander Dameron,” she responded, correcting herself quickly, “We will do what _I_ deem necessary.”

“ _But General-,_ ” he cut across her - his eyes flashing with desperation - urging her to do something in retaliation.

“Now is _not_ the time for a rash response - if we go in guns blazing, it won’t solve anything.” Leia responded, her tone curt.

“General-” Poe cried, trying to make her see what he saw needed to be done.

“I _know_ your feelings on the matter Dameron,” Leia growled, her shorter stature not deterring her from breaching his personal space, “-I’ve been made _well aware_ of them in the past...”

“I-,” Poe began, dark curls dropping as his shoulders sagged in resignation.

“ _Save it._ We have a counter-attack to plan,” Leia responded, cutting him off. Poe’s eye quickly flickered back up to hers – his face breaking into a wide, devilish grin. She watched him process her words for a few seconds before she matched his smile with her own calculating one. She knew the odds were against them _now_ , but it was only another strike or raid before more rallied to their cause. Her son was seeing to that – whether he realised it or not.

“ _Sounds like fun…_ ” Poe smiled, brow furrowing - his hazel eyes blazing with determination.

“Well, I thought you’d like the odds, Dameron…” she laughed, unable to help the smile that formed on her lips as she remembered her wayward husband’s reaction to a situation they had found themselves in back then. One which now seemed a lifetime away – the odds ever against them.

“Should I call the briefing?” he asked, his eyebrow quirked and tone neutral once more.

“Immediately – we’re on _high alert_ now,” she commanded. He saluted stiffly before marching off to gather his comrades. She watched his retreating form, taking a shaky breath to steady herself before she strode into the central hut to begin preparing, running her hands over grey-brown hair and neatening the low bun it hand been pulled into.

                                                                                   

* * *

 

 

“ _Kabira Ren_ ,” Kylo sneers, as he hacks at their marauder, “-ever the sense for the  _theatrics…_ ”

“Don’t _lecture_ me, Kylo…” Kabira jeered, as they pushed their locked blade off from Kylo’s, forcing him backwards and creating more room for themselves. It was evident - even through their mask - that Kylo had irked them with his comment.

Phasma gestured wordlessly with her hands for her troopers to fall back – away from the two combatants that swirled like a storm as they clashed and battled, their lightsabers crackling and hissing as they fought. As they retreated, she spotted the two prone forms of her missing troopers – their bodies twisted at unnatural angles - limbs savagely crushed and bent. Calling for a medic, she watched as they passed their diagnostic tool over her fallen men, relief flooding her when they announced they were still alive. She shuddered at the sight, which soon turned into rage. Phasma _knew_ who was responsible and turned her eyes to watch her Lord fighting the one who had done it.

Kabira was fast, that much was clear. How long they would be able to withstand Kylo’s pummelling blows was another matter.

A gut punch to Kylo’s abdomen nearly staggered him, but the solidity Kabira’s fist found there rumpled their arm. Kylo took the opportunity and grabbed their sword arm, painfully twisting it in a lock that forced them to drop it. Their extinguished saber clattered to the deck.

“Yield,” he said, the command evident in his tone.

Their other arm still free - Kabira channelled the Force through it - hand splayed as the sound of whining metal began to resonate around the derelict hangar. They ducked, tugging the arm Kylo still held in his grasp sharply and using their free hand now to snap his fingers at a frightful angle - forcing him to release it. A second later a large, warped metal floor plate collided with his head, knocking him flying. He landed painfully on his shoulder, wincing as he moved to stand – which elicited a gleeful cackle from his opponent.

 _If it’s a fight Kabira wants,_ Kylo growled internally, _then it’s a fight the witch will get…_

“ _Sir!_ ” shouted Phasma, concern clear in her voice.

“Stay out of this, Phasma – _this doesn’t concern you!_ ” he yelled, anger flaring towards the vicious shade which prowled around the edge of where they stood.

“ _Pitiful,_ Kylo…” giggled the other Knight of Ren as she released the seals on her mask, casting it aside violently. A young woman around 21 years of age stood facing him, her pallor almost blue in its tinge and with grey eyes as sharp as knives. White-blonde hair cascaded down her back, bluntly cut at the ends and with a similarly blunt fringe resting at her brow. She was slim and wiry – deceptive in her stature – but she was one of the most bloodthirsty of his Knights. And the most power-hungry.

She smirked evilly before pulling her lightsaber through the air towards herself – reigniting it in a whip of her wrist.

“ _We’ll see…_ ” replied Kylo, his timbre even as he removed his own mask and dropped it to the ground. Confident despite his earlier fumble.

Kabira charged towards him – her blade bared fiercely – then darting out of range swiftly as he swatted at her with his own. He noted that she was obviously wary of him landing a strike.

 _Damn her speed…_ he thought, watching closely for her next move as she sped around him.

Phasma and her remaining troopers could only watch helplessly from the side-lines, as Kylo struggled to keep up with the other Knight. Inhuman in her swiftness – the gift of the Force being different for each of the Knights of Ren - Kabira rushed Kylo again, attempting to capitalise on what she perceived to be his weakness.

Whilst he acknowledged that his eyes could barely follow her, Kylo spotted her switching tack and her stance before she moved against him once more.

 _She’s nothing if not predictable,_ he observed – readying himself for the right moment.

Flying at him from out of his blind spot – Kylo couldn’t miss her intent, her disdain for him tangible through the Force – she flipped herself up and over him, attempting to strike from above.

 _Your favourite,_ Kylo sneered inwardly.

His hand lashed out above him - fast as a serpent – his fingers locking around her neck like its coils, swinging her down from where she had been a moment before. He smashed her brutally into the metal deck of the hangar floor, deforming the metal below them with the force of the impact.

“ _Yield!_ ” Kylo snarled, his face inches from that of his defeated opponent.

Blood pooled on her smiling teeth, as she began to laugh – madness in her eyes – louder and louder until she spat the gore into his face.

Kylo glowered down at her, disgust on his features. His fingers tightened around her throat, slowing her laugh as he began to choke her. Slowly. As the air began to be crushed from her windpipe, her eyes widened, and her hands began to pull and tug at his unyielding fingers. Gasping fitfully for breath, her eyes began to grow increasingly more bloodshot. Kylo narrowed his eyes, tightening his hold further.

The sound of dozens of boots hammering on metal drew his attention away and Kylo saw two platoons of Troopers moving into the space through the damaged blast door at the entrance of the hangar.

“ _Stand down immediately, Ren!_ ” bellowed General Hux as he strode towards the two Knights, flanked by his bodyguards.

Kylo did not move. Kabira’s breathing grew more desperate.

 _It is not his place to issue me orders on how to discipline my subordinates_ … Kylo roared inwardly.

Nodding to his troopers, Hux watched as they turned their rifles on the defiant Knight.

“I _won’t_ ask again, Ren,” barked the officious young senior officer, the warning in his words crystalline, “Stand. Down.”

Kylo’s face darkened with hatred and he released his wheezing Knight, stomping his way towards Hux. Just as he was about to erupt in fury, his attention was diverted from the blinking General by a distant pull which grew stronger and more powerful until his skull began to feel like it was going to cave in. He stumbled, falling onto one knee as his vision flickered before everything went black.

                                                                                       

* * *

 

 

Rey followed after Ben - mile after mile.

How long they had actually walked, she couldn’t be sure. It was difficult to measure _anything_ here. He only occasionally spared her a glance over his shoulder as they trudged on. He seemed intent on reaching wherever he was leading them - driving them onwards through the endless crisp white sand that stretched off into the horizon. He glanced to their sides every now and then, like he was searching for something.

“Where are we going?” she found herself demanding, feeling the sand now in between her toes. She scowled at that. She’d been so used to it on Jakku that she had eventually stopped noticing it, but now – after having been away from it for so long - it irritated her skin and she had to fight the urge to take her boots off to dislodge it.

“ _You’ll see…_ ” came his cryptic response, as he cast Rey another glance over his shoulder – to check that she was still there. The further they trekked on, the more anxious he seemed to grow. His lanky frame grew stiffer and stiffer.

“Ben-,” she started, irritation starting to seep into her voice.

He stopped in his tracks, swivelling his torso to her with an angular black eyebrow raised, “That’s – that’s the first time you’ve addressed me as… _me,_ ” he smiled softly, those honey-hazel eyes now firmly fixed on her, burning her like embers.

Rey felt heat rising in her cheeks from his admission. He wasn’t _inaccurate_. She tried not to look at him, annoyed at how he was making her feel in that moment.

“Please, just tell me where you’re taking me?” she huffed, gesturing outwards with her hands, trying to shift his intent gaze away from her reddening face to – well, anywhere that _wasn’t_ her face.

Sensing her unease, Ben turned away again, her eyes now falling on his broad back, “Now where’s the _fun_ in _that_ , Rey?” he laughed, his baritone rumbling pleasantly in her ears as he moved off again. The two continued to march on through the bleached earth - walking in silence for a while - until Rey eventually broke it.

“ _How long have you been here?_ ” she asked quietly – stopping to look at him – to watch his reaction.

He turned once more to look at her, head cocking to the side quizzically.

“I… _don’t know,_ ” he smiled again – bashfully - glancing down at his large feet, “…but I’m happy for the company.”

 _He looks identical to him_ , Rey thought, as she took Ben in. She realised now he had no scar on his face. No mark from where she had forever marred his… _other_. He stepped towards her then, coming to a stop less than an inch from her. His eyes seemed to search hers for some sort of guidance that this was okay – that he wasn’t making her uncomfortable. She felt her pulse begin to quicken at their closer proximity.

“ _Truly,_ Rey,” he murmured softly, “I’ve been here for so long on my own - you can’t imagine what it’s been like…” Ben continued, his eyes downcast.

Rey reeled a bit at that.

 _Of course, I can imagine!_ she flared inwardly, _my family abandoned me on Jakku for kriff’s sake!_ Unconsciously taking a step backwards at his remark, she was caught off-guard when his warm hand wound around her upper arm gently - as if to hold her in place.

“ _I’m sorry…_ ” he whispered - face now obscured by his thick, charcoal hair, as he averted his head in embarrassment.

Momentarily disarmed by this, Rey felt her upset dissipate.

“ _Don’t be,_ ” she smiled gently, “I _can_ imagine…”

Ben’s head snapped back up to her at this new piece of information, watching her intently.

A strange emotion, which Rey thought was relief, passed across Ben’s features in an instant before it was gone. He reached down abruptly for her hand – as if it were the most normal thing in the world - clasping it tightly in his own much larger hand.

“ _Come,_ ” he beckoned, his eyes asking her to follow him, “…please.”

Rey gulped tightly, her throat feeling closed.

She could only nod in response, before she felt herself being tugged along behind him, their pace quickening through the bone-white dunes. They ran together, on towards the horizon and on again up and down the dunes they climbed. Rey could hardly breathe from the burning of her lungs and the sweat clinging to her skin. She was glad her hair was pulled back, when she caught sight of Ben’s hair plastered slick against his neck and face.

The ghostly sun was beginning to dip into the horizon, its pale light now casting lengthy shadows over the dunes ahead.

Ben slid to a stop suddenly, forcing Rey to try to dig her heels into the sand, to stop herself sliding into his back. She narrowly managed to avoid colliding with his larger frame. He tugged on her hand gently, signalling to her he wanted her to stand next to him. Rey felt herself swallowing hard again, her mouth drying.

“ _I don’t bite,_ ” he laughed warmly, upon catching her watching him warily, before gently releasing her hand.

Her hand felt much cooler from the loss.

Glancing up at him, she followed his line of sight across the sand at the top of the dune they had climbed, something _familiar_ about the place. Spotting the vivid crimson markings which seemed to float and flicker just above the sands, Rey suppressed a shudder now upon seeing them again.

“They keep me here,” Ben spoke - his voice soft and low as he gestured towards the strange ring of sigils which faded into the distance in either direction, “-bound to this place.”

 _Imprisoned?_ She pondered, watching his solemn expression.

“I’ve tried to move past them, but I can’t – each time I do brings _unbearable_ pain,” he continued, his eyes upon hers, “-it’s as if it’s designed that way...” His head tipped his dark waves down again as his gaze fell to the ground once more.

Something near to Rey’s heart was rocked by a twinge of pity as she watched him.

Ben’s head suddenly whipped up again - _eyes now frantic_ \- as if sensing something she could not.

“Rey - we don’t have much time,” he exclaimed, turning to gently grip her hands once more, “-I need you to listen to me, _carefully._ ”

She could sense then how agitated he was – it pulled at her, almost ripping in its power.

“When you dream - think of me and you’ll find your way back to me, _I promise..._ ” he smiled softly, “-I don’t know how much time we’ll get together here, but I have _so much_ to try to tell you. To-” Ben’s features grew ashen - his form seeming to dissipate and reappear – areas of his body fading in and out and taking on a blackened ash-like flurry as they did.

Rey couldn’t help the fear which shot through her at what she was witnessing. They had only just met and begun to get to know each other and it felt like he too was being ripped from her.

“ _Ben!_ ” she cried, reaching for him when he swayed backwards unsteadily on his feet, away from her. “ _Please!_ What’s going on?”

“There’s… no time… Rey… you have to-” he ground out, his smile not reaching his eyes before he began to sway towards her again on unsteady feet, “-you have to trust me...”

He screamed out painfully with a sound that reverberated in her chest - before falling to his knees - hands clawing into his black mane. Howling out in anguish again, his body arched forwards, wracked with pain. Rey felt herself wanting to comfort him from whatever this was - to reach out for him - unable to conceal the pulse of fear she released.

Ben’s eyes flew desperately to hers as soon as he felt it, pleading with her, “Please Rey, _don’t!_ Hide yourself until you can find me again.”

He contorted backwards, veins standing out on his neck as he cried out in agony. Rey jumped at the sight, hands frozen as she moved to try to reach him again.

“ _Don’t believe anything he might tell you…_ ” Ben cried out. And then he flickered out of existence in an explosion of ash.

Rey stood, rooted to the spot. Horror flooding her veins.

 _What was that?_ She shivered, _Who was Ben warning me about?_

 


	12. Like Water In The Desert

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo has another visitation. 
> 
> The Resistance start their plan for a counter-strike. 
> 
> Rey and Kylo have an argument that begins to take a turn… 
> 
> *Reylo if you squint*

Kylo awoke lying slumped on the grating, face mashed into it. Groggily, he hauled himself up onto his arms, head pounding. The sound of Hux ranting on to Phasma in the background reached his ears and he was faintly aware of First Order medic and support droid running their diagnostic tools over him. His eyes readjusted almost painfully to the new brightness within the formerly cavernous hangar of the destroyed Resistance Base.

 _They must have been able to restore some of the power…_ he noted, dimly.

“Lord Ren – are you alright?” called out the medic, realising that he was regaining consciousness. Two troopers stood guard behind them – with many more poring over the guts of the base, obviously searching for survivors. A rapid series of beeps came from the shiny black medical droid which watched him, its large, single red optic glancing to the medic for input.

Kylo did not respond at first – disoriented and still regaining his bearings amid the pounding in his ears, his head felt like it had been crushed – like the very plates of his skull had been ground together.

“ _Lord Ren?..._ ” the medic asked again, less than a foot away from him.

As if brought back from wherever his thoughts had been, Kylo pushed himself up off the floor, rising silently to watch the scene around him. Phasma and Hux stood at the other side of the hangar, deep in disagreement over something and as he continued to look, he spotted Kabira Ren, under guard.

“I’m fine!” he barked hoarsely, feeling a small ache of guilt as he heard the low whirr from the droid, catching sight of it and the First Order medic as they looked at each other, as he watched them from over his shoulder, “ _…thank you_. Dismissed.”

The medic saluted shakily – their nerves jangling at the edges of his awareness – before they and their droid swiftly about-faced.

Alone in his survey of the scene once more, Kylo felt his hand tightening within his leather glove, wanting to slam it into the titanium column next to him, to hammer it again and again until it was thoroughly dented and deformed. Distaste swirled in his mouth. Kabira watched him, he could sense her grey gaze.

 _Is she smiling?_ He wondered in quiet disbelief, feeling his anger flare at the realisation.

She had attacked Phasma’s men – fellow members of the First Order. She could have knocked them out if their arrival during her mission _– whatever it had been -_ had so taken her by surprise. Instead, she had broken limbs and burned flesh, bringing unnecessary suffering.

 _Had she been caught up in her own bloodlust?_ he pondered, his stare not leaving hers as their eyes met.

She did not blink. Her gaze was dark and shark-like.

“Lord Ren?” one of the guarding Stormtroopers asked, sensing the tension beginning to heighten in the chamber again.

Rounding on them, he jerked his head to where Phasma and Hux still argued. The troopers glanced at each other, watching as he strode across the hangar bay. The raised voices got louder and louder and Phasma’s anger was like a tangible flame around her. Hux’s skin was tinged russet with rage as the two clashed verbally.

 _Unusual for them,_ Kylo thought to himself coolly as he drew nearer.

“I understand you don’t _agree_ with her methods, Phasma – but I think we can both agree they are _effective_!” Growled the sharp-tongued General, the veins standing out on the sides of his neck, just peeking over the top of his collar.

“ _Effective?!_ ” Phasma fired back, stomping across the metal deck to stare down her superior. Without needing to see her face, Kylo could tell she would have struck Hux if she could – only her sense of duty kept the desire in check. She was a true soldier. Her loyalty and discipline were unquestionable, “I have men – _First Order troopers_ – who may no longer be able to serve, _because_ of those methods!”

Hux’s expression changed immediately and he now looked as if the blow she had never thrown had actually connected. He had done Phasma an unmistakable disservice and he knew then that he would have to work hard for their relationship to recover. He took a breath, straightening his suit sleeves, “The _mission_ was a _success_ , Captain. _We were effective_ , which is much more than it would have been had it been under Kylo’s leadershi-”

Choosing that moment to clear his throat, announcing his arrival, Kylo couldn’t disagree that their mission _had_ been a success. There appeared to be no survivors on base – save for the First Order personnel now swarming within its walls – and their TIE fighter squadrons would pick off any stragglers from the futile escape effort. All that was left of the Resistance on Dantooine was the smouldering cathedral of twisted metal that had been their hideout, littered with starfighter and transport debris. A monument to their failure.

Sensing the familiar, cool presence edging up to him, he cast a sideways glance as Phasma’s chrome armour came into his peripheral vision.

“Glad to see you’ve recovered, Lord Ren,” she announced, her tone now even and without a hint of the rage he could still sense boiled within her veins.

“Report please, Captain,” Kylo ordered, calmly, enjoying how uncomfortable Hux now seemed – his mutinous words caught tumbling out of his stupid mouth – he would remember that. They had verbally traded blows before, but never so openly in front of lower ranks.

Dutifully recounting events, Kylo could feel that she was deeply unsettled by Kabira’s actions, Hux’s apathy towards her protests and at Kylo’s sudden blackout but knew that she would deal with it within her mission report as she had, so often in the past. Professionally. Kylo gave her a curt nod once she had finished, fixing Hux with a withering glare which prompted the power-hungry bureaucrat to find the floor immensely interesting. Satisfied by how much he had been able to make Hux squirm, Kylo swept over to where Kabira sat – four stormtroopers surrounding her, their weapons fixed on her should she make a move.

“ _As for you…_ ” he sneered, disgust dripping from his voice, he could feel his anger returning as he watched her looking up at him as if nothing had happened. Reaching down to grip the cowl of her cloak firmly, he hauled her up to her feet so that she could see he meant what he was about to say, “If you _ever_ challenge my command in combat again, _be sure to finish me_ , Kabira.”

She merely smirked at him in response, knowing that it would irritate him. Kabira had vastly underestimated Kylo’s feelings on the matter, for she soon found herself lifted off the ground and the breath cut off from her lungs as Kylo gestured with his right hand to crush her windpipe.

“Few would forgive such insubordination,” he spat at her, his face cruel as she gasped like a fish hauled out on a fisherman’s line, her hands clawing in the air at a hand that wasn’t around her neck, “ _I won’t forget it…_ ”

Kabira’s feet began to dance a gallows jig as her gasping slowed and her eyes rolled backwards. Kylo held her like that, suspended in mid-air, until her breathing had nearly stopped – the desire to snap her neck never leaving him – and _only_ then, did he release her. Her limp body fell to the floor with a reverberating clatter, her eyes flickering as she gulped down oxygen once more. Everyone in the hangar stopped in their tracks, frozen at the sight. He could feel Phasma’s vindication emanating as she ran over to him. _Good._ She hadn’t deserved what had happened to her men and Hux needed to see how Kylo dealt with such infractions.

He was eager to commune with his Master on the matter and hopefully Grandfather.

Hoping they would absolve their actions in the Resistance base as having been necessary.

That they would acknowledge what the First Order had done here had been for the greater good.

He hoped he could help the gir- _Rey_ \- see that her precious Resistance only brought more suffering for all.

 _No_ , he would _make_ her see that…

                                                                               

* * *

 

 

Kylo tore his mask off, slamming it into the wall of his private chambers immediately after the door had slid shut, the sound of it striking the wall panels rattling loudly around the room. He paced furiously across the textured metal floor, bathed only in the cool glow of the white light at the side of his bed. He had been unable to shake the roiling irritation of Kabira’s smirk the entire flight back from Dantooine.

Or the curious sensation that someone had been poking around in his head, after the grating ache had eventually subsided. He still felt foggy and there was a lingering pleasurable shiver to his spine, like he had been in _her_ presence once more. Rey still eluded him, but he couldn’t deny that it felt like her.

 _Two can play at that game_ , he mused darkly, resuming his march.

 _Grandfather would know what to do… he always does…_ Kylo thought to himself, as his hand tremored slightly. Gingerly crossing over to the shrine of the twisted mask, he sat down in front of it, head bowed. Willing his mind to be still, he slowly inhaled and exhaled, trying to open himself further to the Force. He was almost immediately forced down to the floor in a cowering bow, unable to will his limbs to raise him from his prone position, his muscles searing with the effort.

 _‘Boy…’_ boomed the dark voice within the back of his mind, its timbre demanding his attention, ‘you have done _well…_ ’

Ren could not help but release a small burst of elation upon hearing his idol commend him.

 _‘But not well enough,’_ it intoned, the voice seeming to almost suffocate him with its power, ‘the girl _still_ eludes you.’

“ _She-_ She was never at the base,” Kylo admitted, trying to muffle his embarrassment – his face shrouded beneath his hair as he remained pressed firmly to the floor by the pressure of the Sith Lord’s power, “but we have a few leads to follow up on from the communications we decrypted.”

‘That… is more _pleasing,_ ’ Vader announced, releasing Kylo from his tight hold, ‘but there is another reason for your… interruption…’

Kylo fought the offense sparking within his chest at the notion that his request for guidance was deemed an ‘interruption’.  Fighting down the urge to defend himself from his Master’s criticism, he instead drew in a deep breath before answering. “I can _feel_ it - the Light - it pulls at the corners of my mind,” he exclaimed, as if confessing some great misdeed.

He felt a ripple of _something_ in the room with him.

 _Amusement? Disappointment?_ his mind began to race as the silence stretched out following his admission.

‘It is your _bond_ with her. She calls to you, in her subconscious, to draw you _closer_. Resist the pull to the Light, my apprentice, it is the path of the weak of heart…’ commanded Vader’s distinctive synthetic growl.

“ _Please_ , Grandfather, teach me how to _resist_ her?” Kylo pleaded, unsure whether he had made himself appear unworthy in Vader’s eyes.

‘You need not resist the pull of the _girl,_ _only_ the pull to the _Light_. Use her _desire_ to strengthen your bond and _twist_ it for your own ends,’ ordered his Master, Vader’s voice seeming to grow in volume, as if he were standing before Kylo, ‘I will teach you the ways of _Dun Möch…_ ’

“Dun Möch?” wondered Kylo, unable to contain the awe spreading into his tone, dark eyes growing wide.

‘ _Yes,_ it is a powerful weapon against the Jedi – especially when their will is less… _certain…_ ’ said Vader, the malevolence overflowing in his voice.

“ _Show me,_ ” breathed Ren, his deep voice quavering slightly with excitement, “please?”

‘Open your mind, apprentice…’ rumbled Vader, a torrent of power filling the room.

Kylo bowed his head, breathing slowly and deeply. Moments later he was doubled over in agony, his body racked with intense pain – like lightning surged through his veins. Cold sweat formed on his brow, pooling above the bridge of his nose. His sharp features contorted with his suffering, an anguished scream tearing from his throat. His fingers clawed at the floor grating, through his slickening hair, at his face – as if it would cause the pain to cease. Then, darkness fell over his vision.

Kylo awoke some time later. His head throbbed with a dull pain, limbs and body sore as if he had gone ten rounds in his training room. Pushing himself up and away from the floor, he sat up on his knees, nausea bubbling in his stomach. However, a flicker of a smile tugged at his lips. Grandfather had _not_ disappointed. Now he had _real_ knowledge in how to best Rey. She could be _converted_. _Turned._

 _He_ would be the one to _tame_ her.

She was intriguing. At once so at odds with him and yet, so similar. He tried to deny the sensations in his chest – the thrill – each time they chanced a meeting, as _alien_. He knew it was childish. To deny that part of himself was to deny who he was, what he had _become_.

 _It is the Jedi who scorn attachment, not the Sith_ , he thought.

The quieter part of him wondered where she was, what she did in the moments they weren’t bearing their blades at each other. He imagined the old man trying to teach her, as he had him. Wondering if he was failing her the same way - not that it mattered really - Rey would have a real teacher soon enough. Kylo would make _sure_ of that.

He rose then, feeling his purpose renewed. Squaring his shoulders, he strode towards his wash room, to rid himself of the clammy sweat still clinging to his skin. Disrobing, he caught sight of the silvered scar stretching down his side, changing direction at the juncture of his neck and cutting upwards across his face and right eye. Its colour was still angriest there, a reminder of his failure.

He turned the fresher on, stepping into its hot rain, head bowed as he stood there. His mind drifted to her again. To the defiance that burned in her eyes. To the strength of her will. To the elegant curve of her neck…

 _The curve of her-,_ Kylo shook himself at that, a strange feeling pooling low in his stomach. _Nausea, I must still be nauseous,_ he thought hurriedly, willing himself to believe that would chase the errant though from his mind. The feeling was strangely enjoyable though and he found he could not stop his thoughts from continuing their previous path, the sensation building the longer he stood under the warm water. He leaned back against the cool metal panels of the fresher, a shiver running up his spine at the contact, lips parting slightly.

A small, tentative pulse seemed to echo in the air around him.

His eyes closed in pleasure at this, his mind continuing to drift. _She must be dreaming,_ he thought, half hoping that they would meet again if he joined her in slumber. Concentrating, he released a gentle, answering pulse of his own, a warmth spreading from his chest as it mingled in the air and was answered moments later by a much stronger one. Kylo’s eyes flew open at this – his heart beginning to race - he hurriedly stepped out of the fresher and robed himself in a clean set of sleepwear, before he himself down on his bed.

                                                                                         

* * *

 

Leia stood in front of the room full of concerned faces, still waiting for their leader to speak. Eyes moving across them, she let out a breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding.

“As I’m _sure_ you’re probably already aware, our Dantooine base came under attack at 0600 hours this morning,” she began, tone even, “casualty reports are still coming in and we are still tallying the numbers, but our earliest analyses indicate no survivors on base.” The General was met with a wall of silence. Not even a gasp was uttered. Only weary eyes met hers. Most of those in the room had lost friends in this fight, or in others - she of all people knew that.

“What about those who managed to evacuate?” asked a Twi’lek male, leaning forward in his seat as he did, fang-like teeth bared in anger.

“You know as well as I do that their _best_ chance is to stay hidden,” answered Poe, turning in his seat to meet the orange-skinned male’s sharp gaze.

“Any word on the size of the force that attacked the base?” asked one of the security detail, further to the back of the assembly.

“Our best estimate is at least the full Garrison of Stormtroopers of a Resurgent-Class star destroyer and at least two full TIE/sf squadrons,” answered Leia, moving closer to them all, her hands folded behind her back.

“ _Stars…_ ” muttered a human female in the front row.

“What are command saying, General? Are we to _stay_ here? Shouldn’t we be planning a counter-attack?” challenged the Twi’lek again, rage beginning to darken his features.

“Command are doing as we are and keeping communications brief and on an essential-only basis,” Leia responded calmly, the volume of her voice measured. “For the time being, we _will_ be _staying_ here _until_ we have more information,” she continued, her gaze meeting Poe’s briefly.

“What more ‘information’ do we need, General?” the male barked, prompting Poe to whirl round in his chair once more, dark eyes narrowed in warning.

“You have all the information you need, _Lieutenant!_ ” growled Poe, rising from his chair, the metal screeching against the floor from the force with which he stood up, causing the Twi’lek to jump back.

“That’s _enough!_ Both of you!” said Leia, her voice raised – although calmly, hands slamming flat-palmed against the stone podium she had moved in front of. “The last thing we need right now is any more hot-heads,” she ground out.

Sighing, Poe’s shoulder’s slumped as he pulled himself into his seat again, “ _You’re right,_ General.”

“What we _do_ know is that the First Order targeted not only that base but that they have been tracked moving to positions close to D’Qar and Bespin,” announced Leia, sliding her hands over the stone to rest in front of her as she straightened with regained composure once more. “I _know_ that you will _all_ want to take the fight to them, but I urge you to remain stoic in the face of this attack,” she projected, her wizened eyes moving across the room once more.

“What will you have us do then, General?” pressed the Twi’lek, his tone now more respectful.

“I ask you to remember those we have lost today and to remember that we have a duty to their memory. To remember that we have a duty to all those who seek freedom from the oppression of the First Order - to _protect_ that freedom,” Leia responded, met with resounding cheers from the assembled personnel.

Poe flashed her a smirk, knowing full well that she already had a plan in motion.

“Commander Dameron and I have already co-ordinated with command and are awaiting confirmation of our flotilla’s current position,” she continued, now that the room had died down once more, “-rest assured, we _will_ be taking the fight to _them_. Intelligence has picked up heavy activity within the Jakku region, suggesting they have a re-fuelling station there.”

“You’re planning for us to hit _that?_ ” scoffed the Twi’lek.

“Oh, I don’t _just_ plan for us to _hit it_ , Lieutenant. I fully intend for us to _blow_ it out of the skies,” Leia smiled slyly, her crow’s feet crinkling as she did. The room resounded with whoops and cheers in various languages, her crew now filled with fighting spirit once more.

“That ought to set ‘em back a bit,” laughed Poe, unable to prevent the genuine grin that spread across his face, as he rose to stand with her.

“ _More than a bit,_ ” the General smiled, “if I have my way…”

“ _What_ are you _planning,_ General?” Poe wondered aloud, pleased that they were _finally_ taking action.

“I’m glad you asked Commander Dameron, would you bring up the holo please?” Leia requested, gesturing to the portable emitter to her right.

“It would be my _genuine_ pleasure, ma’am,” Poe beamed back devilishly.

                                                                                             

* * *

 

 

Rey stood there, staring at the dwindling pile of ash that had been Ben. Her veins like ice, she was frozen in place, her face white with terror.

_…Please Rey, don’t!..._

She could feel her heart rattling at her ribs, her pulse pounding in her ears.

_…Hide yourself until you can find me again…_

Her eyes were fixed to where he had kneeled mere minutes before, his eyes urging her to leave and retreat back to safety. He had wanted to protect her, _desperately_. She could still feel the painful twist in her chest as he had been wrenched from her, right before her eyes.

_…Don’t believe anything he might tell you…_

She felt the pulse in the air around her, as if Ben was returning again. Her heart leapt a little at that. _He was okay_. So, she tentatively released one of her own, warmth blossoming in her breast when it was _answered_.

She felt herself turn as his presence grew stronger, a smile beginning to form on her face, “Ben! What happened? _I-,_ ” her smile died on her face as soon as she spotted the scar and sharper features.

“ _Ben?_ ” he sneered, his features a dark reflection of those she had been expecting to see.

“ _You!_ ” Rey spat back, her feet beginning to move her backwards, trying to put distance between them, instinctively.

“Yes, _me…_ ” he intoned, his rich voice almost hurt at her cold reception, hand splaying theatrically across his black-robed chest.

“You _can’t_ be here...” Rey began, as he stepped forwards. Her hazel eyes grew panicked, reaching reflexively for her saber until she flourished it in front of herself, as if to ward him off.

“ _Please, girl…_ ” he groaned, in a baritone disturbingly like Ben’s for a moment, pausing in his advance.

“My name’s not _‘girl’_!” she yelled back, jabbing at him with her blade, forcing him to retreat a few steps and before she could stop herself, “- _it’s Rey!_ ”

His eyes widened for a second, surprised that she had shared any such personal information with him willingly given their last few encounters. He took that piece of intimacy to heart, burying it deep within himself - it was precious. _Special._ He decided then to try moving toward her again, his instinct telling him to be closer.

“Stay back!” she shouted in warning, feet dropping into a ready stance.

“As you _wish_ , Rey,” he said, voice smooth, liking the way her throat shifted when she swallowed at his utterance. At the fact he had caught her off-guard for a moment. Standing before her, he raised his hands up and out, in a peaceful gesture, “I mean you no harm,” he continued, onyx-lashed eyes meeting hers.

“I don’t _trust_ you!” she fired back, feeling uneasy at the strange look he was giving her. She felt like she was on fire and chilled to the bone - all at the same time. It filled her every fibre with _dread._ And with something else, that almost excited her. Something she _dared_ not acknowledge.

“I don’t expect you to…” he smiled softly, eyes flicking down her form and back, face growing neutral as he met her stony gaze, “-would you _please_ put that away?”

Her emerald-flecked, amber eyes flashed over to her readied blade and back, before she spoke, tone firm, “ _Why should I?_ ”

“Because I’m not bearing mine at you, _am I?_ ” he retorted, eyebrow raising in challenge.

This new-found amicable tactic of his was setting her on edge. They had rarely had an interaction that hadn’t ended up with the two of them in a full-on brawl. She had grown to have compassion for the young Ben she saw in her dreams and had grown to like the strange apparition-Ben she had watched vanish in front of her earlier. Before her however, stood Kylo Ren.

“ _Please?_ ” he asked, voice gentler than she had ever heard it, hand reaching for hers as his eyes glanced down to her blade. His large gloved hand gently closed over the hilt to her lightsaber, shutting it off. She found herself unable to move – as if she had been pinned in place. Her frantic eyes flew up to his, his hand sliding down over hers and she felt her body being released from his hold.

Kylo had thrilled at even that fleeting contact with her, his whole being seeming to _sing_ at the touch. It was like he had drank water for the first time after years in the desert. _He wanted more_. So much _more_.

An odd sensation had fluttered within Rey’s chest during the brief time they had been in close proximity - not so dissimilar to the one she felt when she was in Ben’s presence.

 _He isn’t Ben,_ she reminded herself, trying to shake the feeling from her body, _he just looks like him._

“I just wanted to _talk_ to you for once,” he said, voice low and eyes turned to the ground, “ _without_ us trying to _kill_ each other…” Rey didn’t miss the way his frown caused his scar to twist - the scar _she_ had given him. Guilt panged momentarily in her chest. She had struck out at him in anger, the way she had at Luke… Her mind replayed the scene where she had lashed out at him, defending Finn.

“You _hurt_ my friend. _You nearly killed him!_ ” she hissed at him, remembering Finn’s limp form, lying helpless in the snow. Disgust now began to tug on her expression, forcing her to retract away from Kylo.

“ _Rey!_ ” he blurted out, hand flying out to catch her by the wrist, unsure of what to say next. Kylo didn’t expect to be met by her fist connecting with his face. His head swung to the side with the blow and surprised by the power behind it, he released her. Catching sight of her form retreating toward the dunes, he gave chase, his heavier robes ungainly and slowing him down.

Rey sprinted, willing her legs to carry her, swift and sure. Running as fast as she could, she cast a brief glance over her shoulder to see his blurred form tearing after her, dust kicking up around his feet. Re-doubling her efforts, Rey could begin to feel the burning in her limbs, as she pushed them to her limits. She _had_ to get away from him. She knew the desert. _It had formed her._

 _Well, not this one exactly, but I definitely have the edge here…_ she thought to herself.

“ _Rey!_ ” he bellowed after her, legs carrying him as quickly as they could. Annoyance flashing across his features, he threw out his hand, channelling the Force into a powerful pull as he slid into a long slide, his heels digging into the sand. Watching as she was pulled off her feet and yanked backwards, he couldn’t help but let out a self-satisfied smile.

Rey’s expression switched from one of sheer determination to bemusement as she felt her feet give way below her, soaring backwards through the air, palpably feeling the tug from him as their positions grew closer. Mind scrambling in an effort to defend herself, she twisted herself in the air, using the momentum she already had to swing her feet round in a wide arc and pick up more as she went. She used the extra speed to pull herself into a flying kick, enjoying that damned smirk being wiped off his face as her ready boot met the side of his broad chest – sending him flying.

They landed in a heap of tangled limbs, both breathing heavily – hers from the force of her landing and his from having the wind completely knocked out of him.

Kylo recovered quickly though and was on her in seconds, pinning her firmly to the ground, hands clamped to her wrists and knees pressing into her thighs.

“ _Don’t_ do that again…” he ground out, his chest still heaving, face uncomfortably close to hers and half obscured by his now-wild charcoal mane. Her irritation was almost palpable, eyes watching his as he remained there, his gaze now searching hers. Rey could feel the heat from him, at each point their bodies connected.

“I’ll do as I _kriffing_ well please!” she growled at him, her feline eyes narrowing, struggling against him now.

He pushed down more firmly, eyes flashing in warning before they were drawn to the glistening on her neck and the way it trailed downwards, sitting on the exposed area between the base of her neck and her chest. A hum in the Force echoed silently between them, now that they were both still. Rey caught the way Kylo’s hard gaze had softened after it, causing her to shift apprehensively as his eyes roamed over her. Heat rose within her cheeks at his attention.

“What is this pull to you?” he breathed, as if questioning the air between them.

Rey blinked back at him, confused.

“What are you _doing?_ _Get off me!_ ” she yelled, straining at his hold.

Embarrassed, he jumped up suddenly and away from her, as if she had burned him. Kylo’s hands clutched his head as he paced away. Rey’s body felt like it was betraying her, seeming to protest at the distance now between them and at the loss of his touch even more so.

 _Pull?_ She thought, wondering if her was referring to the bizarre connection that they had seemed to share since Starkiller.

His words from that dreadful room rang loudly in her head.

_‘Don’t be afraid. I feel it too…’_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all to everybody who's been reading so far! Never thought I'd make it this far in, but the kudos etc. are what encourages me to keep going :) 
> 
> End Notes: I used the following tracks for this chapter:  
> 'Path to Oryx' - Michael Salvatori - Kylo and *Grandfather; 1:50 is around the 'I will teach you...' mark
> 
> 'Guardian' - Michael Salvatori - The Resistance Briefing
> 
> 'Eyes Down' - Ramin Djawadi - Rey and Kylo's encounter and Kylo giving chase


	13. Creation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and Rey’s encounter grows more… tense…
> 
> The Resistance get ready to move out.
> 
> Ben spends a night reflecting in the waste.

Rey wondered in that moment if there was even a _glimmer_ of Ben within him, as she watched the Knight of Ren frantically pacing through the sand, his dark form a sharp contrast to the chalk-white sand.

He was a shadow of the man she had begun to come to know in this strange wasteland. _A shade._ He turned then, as if sensing her stare, his head lifting from below his curtain of dark hair.

“It doesn’t have to be like this!” he shouted over, beginning to close the distance between them once more.

“ _Like what?_ ” she yelled back, taking a step backwards, her face wearing a cautious expression as he continued to step towards her.

“Like _that!_ ” Kylo snorted, his face pulling into an expression she could only guess was distaste. “ _We’re the same_ , you and I,” he continued, his deep rumbling voice dropping low, “-we strive so hard for the paths we have chosen…”

Rey _couldn’t_ believe what she was hearing, unable to contain the bristling vexation his comment had provoked in her. Kylo’s eyes twitched, narrowing slightly in confusion when the sensation reached him, as if trying to gauge why his comment had offended her so.

“I merely meant that we are both _so set_ on our paths - yet here we find ourselves - still _drawn_ to each other…” his eyes grew soft, almost watery in their dark depths. Rey felt for a moment that something had shifted between them, her hard gaze easing.  “ _Please,_ Rey, _let me teach you?_ ” he breathed out shakily, reaching for her.

Just as his hand inched closer to her face, she felt that same, sharp pain in her chest that she had during her training with Luke.

 _No._ He was still a _murderer_. He had likely killed again, or at least helped the First Order to do so. She swatted his hand away when it was less than a hair’s breadth from her cheek.

“ _Get away from me!_ ” she spat, fire returning to her eyes, her teeth bared. Hair flew about her face as she jumped back, like his very touch was poisonous.

Kylo’s eyes focused on his hand, as if he had been stung, watching it for several heartbeats before he drew it back and clenched it into a tight fist at his side. His nostrils flared briefly, before the hardness returned to his eyes once again.

“Is _this_ how it’s to be then - _always_ at _war_ with each other?” he seethed, emotion bleeding into his cool voice, “ _No-one_ understands you the way _I_ do, Rey!”

“ _Understand me?_ You don’t _know_ anything about _me!_ ” she retorted, her fingers brushing the hilt of the saber clipped to her belt, in threat.

“ _Oh,_ but I _do_ , Rey…” he murmured as his dark eyes ran down her form to it and slowly, _languidly,_ back to her face once more. Then, changing subject, “Has the old man _shown_ you _anything_ more than a few _cheap_ parlour tricks?” Kylo asked wryly, edging forwards to her slowly.

Bringing up Luke had now set her on the back foot. He could sense her unease – the quavering of her spirit – so, he decided to press on.

“ _No?_ ” He purred, after wincing when he saw her reaction to his question, “A _shame_ really - I thought he would have seen your _potential_ , your _strength_. That he would have willingly given you the guidance you so strongly _desire?…_ ” he interrogated her, circling as she moved to try and maintain their distance.

“I don’t _know_ what you _think_ you’ve seen-” she cried out defiantly, trying to come up with something – anything - which would silence him.

“I _know_ what you _want_ , Rey. I’ve seen enough to know that you _fear_ abandonment. That you threw in your lot with the first person to pay you any heed for more than what you could _offer_ them…” he continued, prowling around her, his voice making her feel like a serpent had coiled tightly round her throat. She willed her limbs to move, but there seemed to be a serious disconnect between her inner thoughts and her actions. Her muscles trembled as she tried to force herself to move.

He was behind her now.

“I wonder if your old Master will take you back after what you’ve _done_ \- _what he made you do?_ ” he whispered, far too close for her comfort. “ _This,_ Rey, _I understand._ He is _failing_ you, the way that he failed _me_. He _fears_ you, as he once feared _me_. He _cannot_ see the bigger picture...” Kylo laughed bitterly.

Rey could feel him - inches from her back - every hair on her body standing on end when she felt his breath fanning the skin of neck. She shivered, clamping her eyes shut in a desperate effort to block him out.

“You are _special,_ Rey,” he breathed, his lips almost at the edge of her ear.

A _dreadful_ , elongated shiver tingled up her spine - one some _deep_ , dark part of her felt a _thirst_ for.

She stood, stock still, terrified to open her eyes.

When she eventually did, Kylo Ren was long gone.                                                                                   

                                                                                               

* * *

 

 

Rey awoke, alone, in her chambers. She reached out shakily with the Force, adrenaline still pumping in her veins after their encounter. Sensing no remaining presence, she ran her hands over her face in frustration. She felt as if she were being driven mad. _Perhaps I am?_ she wondered quietly into the darkness of the room.

Deciding she should try to apologise to Master Luke, she slid her legs out from below the covers and moved to exit towards the opening of her stone hut. It was still nightfall outside, as far as she could tell, based on the lack of light coming in from around the gaps in the wooden doorframe. She could sense activity, further within the camp. She pulled the door open and slowly wandered between the structures.

She could see the frenzy of the Resistance members who had been their guests, as they moved equipment backwards and forth, a steady stream of crates and packs making their way back down to the landing zone – to Poe’s X-Wing and the Falcon. _They’re leaving,_ she noted, spotting Poe overseeing the loading of equipment onto a trolley.

“ _Poe!_ What’s going on?” she called out to him, walking over to where he stood, hands on her hips as she gestured with her head, in question.

“Rey?” he asked, a surprised smile spreading across his face as he took her in, “Dantooine base was attacked. The General and command have decided to _end_ our excursion here early - _I’m sorry…_ ” he said, sadness in his coffee-coloured eyes and an apologetic tone when he spoke.

“Stars!” exclaimed Rey in horror, her expression like something had clicked into place. “It was the First Order, _wasn’t it?_ ” she asked, an edge to her voice.

“How did you-” Poe began to ask - his brows knitting together in befuddlement - before she cut him off.

“It doesn’t matter… Tell me Finn _wasn’t_ there?” she pleaded, her eyes shining with deep emotion, moving closer to him and searching his expression.

“No - _Finn’s fine_ \- he’s still not awake yet, but he was _nowhere_ near there,” he smiled gently, resting a warm hand on her shoulder. “I don’t have a lot of time before we’re due to dust-off,” Poe began, his eyes falling slightly. “BB was hoping we were going to be here a bit _longer…_ ” he continued, his voice trailing off as he reached up in that familiar nervous gesture of his, to rub absentmindedly at the back of his neck.

“ _Just BB?_ ” challenged Rey, her hair swinging slightly as she tilted her chin playfully, her almond shaped eyes narrowing in mock-suspicion.

“ _Well…_ ” he smiled crookedly, “ _I was too…_ ”

She smiled broadly at that, before enveloping him in a firm hug. Poe stood for a moment, before he moved his hands around her in return, touching his cheek lightly to the crown of her head.

“I’m going to _miss_ you,” she muttered, into the shoulder of his jacket.

Feeling a light bump at her leg, she craned her neck down to find BB-8’s shiny black optic looking at them, who released a sad beep before brushing against her leg again.

“… _And you BB!_ ” she laughed, as she let go of Poe to crouch down in front of the little droid.

“Promise you’ll keep him out of _too_ much trouble?” she winked, gesturing back up at a suddenly-flushed Poe. She received a string of beeps in response, before the small astromech rolled over to her and bumped its head against her knee. “We’ll meet again - _I promise,_ ” she smiled, reaching down to pat its head affectionately.

“We, _uh,_ we should get going… I’ve got pre-flight checks I need to run,” announced Poe, although his face seemed to be warring with the rest of him to say something more.

“ _Oh!_ Yes, I should really go and check on Master Luke after yesterday…” Rey blurted out, giving them a quick wave, before she spun on her heel and headed off in the direction of Luke’s hut.

She missed Poe’s face fall while he watched her until she disappeared around the corner.

Coming to a stop at the door to Luke’s hut, her hand hesitated at the door, hovering over the weathered timber.

“ _Rey?_ You can come in,” shouted Luke from within, before she heard him coughing violently.

Gingerly pushing the door open, she saw him sitting at the edge of his cot, spluttering and hacking heavily.

“Master Luke, I’m-” Rey began, head bowed as she fidgeted with her arm wrappings.

“I _know_ , Rey” he smiled, in between coughing fits, doubled over as he did, “-but the important thing is that you came _back._ ”

“I didn’t _mean_ to, I didn’t _know-_ ” she continued, her eyes looking through her lashes anxiously at him.

“It’s _alright_ , Rey, I should’ve learned my lesson the _last_ time I taught one so strongly connected to the Force,” he spluttered. Luke reached for his cup of water with the Force, sliding it across the stone tablet to the side of his cot, gulping it down quickly. “Guess there’s still room for an old man to learn…” he smiled softly.

Rey shuddered a bit at Luke’s deprecating remark, Kylo’s earlier words dripping back into her mind, like venom.

_‘Has the old man shown you anything more than a few cheap parlour tricks?’_

“Then _teach_ me. _Please,_ Master Luke, can we please move past whatever is holding you back?”, she pleaded, her hazel eyes shining with earnestness. “I _want_ to _help_ the Resistance any way I can, but I can’t help them stop him if you _won’t_ teach me…” she continued, her voice quieting as Luke’s eyes closed upon sensing her disturbance.

“ _What is it,_ _Rey?_ ” he asked gently, his eyes reopening and moving to fix themselves firmly on the young woman’s face.

She didn’t know how to respond, initially. His question was so _direct_. Rey wavered for a moment longer than she should have whilst deciding whether to tell him and how much.

“ _Rey?_ ” he pressed, his tone taking a firmer edge.

“I’ve seen _him_ since our last discussion… He’s… _spoken_ to me”, she whispered, averting her eyes to the floor. The shame at having had her earlier unbidden reactions to Kylo Ren, bubbling up within her chest. She could not meet her Master’s gaze.

“ _Seen who?_ ” he asked, his voice now with a hint of concern, rather than chiding.

“ _Ren,_ ” she admitted, her shoulders heaving with the effort to get the words from her lips, and before she could stop herself from uttering more, “-but not _just_ him…”. Her eyes flickered up to meet Luke’s briefly, before she tore them away from his grey-blue orbs.

“ _Who else, Rey?_ ” Luke pushed on, his tone beginning to take on a more desperate edge. His eyes widened with what she could only guess was apprehension.

“I’ve…” she didn’t know how to tell him she had met his long-dead nephew.

 _How could you tell someone that without it seeming ridiculous?_ She asked herself, incredulous. Ben Solo was _dead_. _Gone._ And yet she has _met_ him on _more_ than one occasion. _He’d held her hand._ Her courage returning for a fleeting moment, she decided to tell her Master everything, “ _I’ve met Ben!_ ”

“You’ve _what?_ ” asked Luke, face in shock for a few seconds.

“I’ve met Ben - I don’t know _why_ \- or _how_ to explain it, but we’ve found each other,” she blurted out, beginning to pace her way around the room as she recounted her meetings with his nephew. Of the place she found him in. _Of the tree._

Luke’s face gave her nothing in terms of being able to gauge his reaction beyond complete confoundment. He merely sat and listened as she poured out every detail she could. She left nothing undisclosed in relation to the young man who had appeared to her from within a dead tree. In a wasteland. In a place she could only reach as she slept. It all sounded so _utterly_ ludicrous. She wouldn’t have believed it herself had she not felt the warmth of his hand on hers, the light of his smile.

“Ben’s _gone,_ Rey…” Luke began, motioning to her to fetch him some more water. She retrieved it dutifully, setting it down in front of him as he poured and took a long, shaky drink of the liquid. “Yet, you say you’ve seen him,” he continued, his eyes on hers with an expression still unreadable and his presence in the Force remote.

“ _I swear,_ ” she replied, her face unable to conceal her desire for him to believe her.

“I sense no dishonesty with you, but that does not mean that there is _none_ in this… situation,” Luke remarked, his face suddenly growing pensive.

“What do you mean, Master?” she asked, not understanding what he meant.

“The Sith are known for their ability to play on the weaknesses of their foes. To use compassion _against_ them, as a distraction. _Be cautious_ , Rey, this ‘Ben’ you’ve met may _not_ be who he says he is…” Luke announced, his face now guarded.

Rey couldn’t suppress her surprise at Luke’s reaction. She thought her Master of all people might have believed her, but as she thought on it more, she felt her own doubts beginning to creep in. She had been _so ready_ to trust Ben, _so quick_ to believe his story. How would she be able to know if he was telling the truth or not?

“This... may give us some _insight,_ ” Luke announced, eyes moving back to her again, “My nephew, may _still_ be in there, _somewhere…_ ” he continued, bracing his hands on his knees. “I need your help, Rey. You might be the _only_ person that can get through to him - Force knows I tried…” he muttered, pushing himself unsteadily on to his feet.

Rey moved to him immediately, offering her shoulder to steady him, “What do you mean, Master?”

“We haven’t got much time. We’d better find my sister…” he replied vaguely, their eyes meeting for a moment, before he motioned to head towards the door.

                                                                                       

* * *

 

Ben came to and while he had been gone, night had fallen.

No sound but the blowing breeze greeted his ears and no sensation or presence met him, other than the chill of the night air on his skin, as he pushed out with the Force.

 _Alone again, then…_ he thought.

He wandered aimlessly, until he spotted the faint, red glow from the top of one of the dunes. Heading towards it, he could feel the sharp, shrill buzz of it – like static – in his head. It seemed to hum within his very being the closer in proximity he drew to it. He reached his hand out, testing, to see if he would feel the same sensation he always did when he breached its ward. It remained, for almost a minute, before he snatched it back with a painful hiss.

Shaking it off, as if that would speed up the dissipation of pain from his hand, he flopped down ungracefully onto the sand – his back to the shifting glyphs above its surface. Ben sat with his long legs stretched out open before him, in his light grey coverings – arched at the knees with his hands draped loosely at the elbows, resting on top. He tilted his head down level with his chest, leaving it there for a while as he thought of her, of the girl who had found him here. _Of Rey._

It was _strange_. How so simple an action – a touch - had awoken something so strong as _defiance_ in him once again.

Rey was _strong,_ he observed, with a strength he had not known since… His eyes burned slightly at the memory.

 _He_ had stolen everything from him. _His calling. His family. His father. His first lov-_

Shaking the thought from his head, Ben huffed out a long, anguished breath, like it would relieve the heaviness of his heart. _She_ was _so full_ of Light. It had _called_ to him, the moment _that fool_ had laid a hand on her in Takodana. He supposed he should thank him, for that much at least.

He sat there, looking back towards the spot from which he had finally re-emerged, spotting a pale bluish-green shimmering. He blinked for a moment, before swiping at his eyes. Deciding that the shimmer was still there, he jumped up, sand flying off him as he started to run down the steep dune, feet faltering a few times in his descent.

He ran on for what felt like leagues, the flickering light growing brighter as he did.

Growing closer, he could begin to make out that there was something there, in the scorched earth. He skidded to a halt, when he could see it more clearly. It was a tiny sapling – like a… _tree_.

His eyes widened almost imperceptibly as he stepped around it slowly.

He slumped onto his knees, in the dark soil before it. His mind was flooded by memories of idly discussing flora with the woman he had loved. Of the hot, lazy summer afternoons that he had spent in her presence - that he once had _craved_ so much as a boy. Of the _feel_ of her skin. Of _her_ lips on _his_.

Ben’s mind drifted back to _their_ field the afternoon he had decided he had _loved_ her – _Reina -_ amongst the flowers on the hill above the lake. She had been _beautiful._ He edged towards her as she had turned away from him - unable to help himself - then she had turned back with those arresting green eyes, he had frozen for a moment – to drink them in.

When his courage had returned, he had pressed forward again, feeling her silk-soft strands between his fingers and the heat pooled in his stomach as she had reacted to his touch. He had reached for her then - his lips on hers chastely - testing the blurred boundary between tutor and student, before she had returned his kiss. The warmth of her mouth _so_ inviting, he could not sate the hunger she had sparked in him.

They had ended up in a tangle of limbs - side by side with a scatter of petals around them - the warmth of each other reassuring as they held each other in the flowers, her delicate hand cradling his face. How she had confessed that she now knew she could no longer deny her fondness for him and the way his heart had leapt at the knowledge.

He had held on to this memory for so long. _Desperately._

Their time together had been always been like that - full of the innocence of young love.

The ache in his chest when he remembered what _he_ had done to her cut him more deeply than any blade could.

Yet, as he sat there, kneeling before the glowing sprout, he was drawn back to the feisty young woman with the skeptical face - with the soul _full_ of _hope_.

 _Rey._ _He had to show this to Rey…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I used the following tracks in the writing of this chapter: - 
> 
> 'Love and Death on Observer Island' - Chris Tilton - Kylo and Rey's encounter concludes.
> 
> 'Zihuatanejo'- Thomas Newman - Rey returns to ask forgiveness and Luke and Rey discuss her encounters with Ren. And Ben.
> 
> 'Excerpt from the Tribulation' - Michael Salvatori - Ben's reflections in the desert night.
> 
> I just want to say a massive thank you to all of my readers and especially to everyone who's left kudos/subscribed/bookmarked and left comments - it really does mean a lot to me to know people enjoy my writing! See you all at the next update :)


	14. Falling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luke and Leia share some last thoughts on the road ahead of them all.
> 
> Rey and Poe bond further over the worry of losing a friend.
> 
> Ben takes Rey to his discovery.

Rey and Luke hurried down to the makeshift landing zone at the lower cliffs, the slender young woman helping her more aged Master to tackle the stone steps. As they neared the last group of flights down, the sound of the ships’ drives cycling reached them.

“ _We have to hurry, Rey_ ,” muttered Luke, his brow furrowed in thought. He gestured forwards with a series of flicks from his artificial hand. She rolled her head over to regard him for a moment, before she picked up the pace, now half-hauling her Master forwards whilst they hobbled along. As they cleared the last few steps, Rey could make Leia out talking to the _strange_ gold droid she’d only seen a handful of times since their arrival, and a young female officer with her hair in tight, sand-coloured buns. As if sensing their approach, the General finished up her conversation, bidding her attendants to their duties.

“I suppose I have _you_ to thank for him coming down here, Rey?” Leia greeted, a warm smile on her face.

“ _Sorry…_ ” Rey muttered, averting her gaze like a small child caught doing something they shouldn’t. The wind was stronger down here nearer the waves, loose strands of her chestnut brown hair being whipped across her features and the lighter fabric of her robes tangling around her legs as she helped her Master across to his twin.

“We thought we’d at least see our guests off,” grinned Luke. Rey caught the mischievous twinkle in his sky-coloured eyes as he moved to stand on his own, patting her shoulder gently as he left her side. “Rey, why don’t you go see if the Commander needs a _hand_ over there?” he gestured with his head, over her shoulder.

As she turned, she caught sight of Poe going over his X-Wing again before take-off. Without warning, sparks started to fly out of one of the engines, showering the pilot as he passed the rear of the craft. Rey shot Luke a questioning glance, before she ran over to help the yelling pilot, but was merely met by the merry crinkling of his crow’s feet.

“A little _dramatic_ , don’t you think?” laughed Leia, as she turned away from the scene unfolding by the starfighter. She too had caught on that the sudden engine fault was not _entirely_ a coincidence.

“They’ve been a good influence on each other, Leia. I think their time together here has done them _both_ some good,” her brother responded earnestly.

“You’re not wrong…” his sister smiles at him, resting her hand gently over her brothers, but she immediately sensed his conflict, “ _There’s something else though,_ ” she prompted, her hand slowly recoiling, forcing Luke’s eyes out to the sea. He stood for a moment, weighing his words carefully, before he spoke.

“There are _other_ influences. _Influences_ we’ve already spoken about, that are affecting Rey…” Luke begin, his timbre growing grave as he folded his arms behind his back.

“ _Luke,_ we’ve been over _this_. If there’s _any_ hope of getting through to _him_ – even a sliver of a chance, it’s through _that girl!_ ” his twin responded, joining his gaze out at the cresting waves. Drawing in a deep breath, Luke’s shoulders drooped, as if under the burden of what he was about to say.

“How can you be so _sure_ , Leia… after _all_ he’s done?” Luke asked, his voice wavering with emotion.

“Because he’s _my son_ , Luke. _And your nephew._ Han _never_ gave up on him – don’t let _his_ sacrifice be in vain…” she responded, tears forming at the corners of her eyes – that threatened to, but never fell.

“She says she’s seen him, you know,” her twin responded, after a drawn out, _painful_ silence - wounds still too fresh for either of them to address fully.

“Well, you did say you had a _hunch_ about their having a _‘bond’_ …” Leia answered, turning to her brother again, tilting her head to the side in question.

“I did, but not just _him_ , Leia,” Luke continued, taking a breath to steady himself before he delivered the news, “-she says she’s seen _Ben_ ,” he breathed, his eyes searching his twin’s, for any sign of reaction. Leia’s face remained serene, as if she hadn’t heard a word of what Luke had just told her. When there was _still_ no sign of a reaction, Luke pushed out to her in the Force and was almost knocked over by the strength of the love he felt there. A maternal smile had settled on his sister’s features.

“ _He’s alive,_ ” she said quietly, her hand moving to clutch the necklace at her breast.

“ _Perhaps,_ ” replied Luke, “but the only way to know for sure is for Rey to keep up this _‘contact’_. You _know_ my thoughts on this, Leia…”

“I know, Luke, but I think you do _both_ of you a disservice with your pessimism!” retorted Leia, taking his robed shoulder in her hand with a light shake. “She’s _stronger_ than you give her _credit_ for. She survived this long _without you,_ ” she continued, her eyes now squarely fixed on his. He held her gaze for a few moments, before his face split into a smile again.                                                                                       

                                                                                               

* * *

 

 

By the time Rey had reached the X-Wing, Poe had already leapt into the cockpit, his upper half completely obscured from view as he rooted around inside for his fire-fighting kit.

“ _Buddy!_ I need you to do what you can - _now!_ _Before we lose anything!_ ” he yelled, his voice muffled somewhat by the cockpit. A responding squeal came in answer, before she spotted BB-8 rocketing off to the side following a loud bang.

“ _Kriff!_ _BB?!_ ” He shouted, whipping his head up too quickly and smacking it off the cockpit’s canopy. “ _God-damn it!_ ” he cried, clutching his head as he jumped down and ran over to the smoking form of the little astromech, which rolled up once with a plaintive whimper of a ‘bloop’ and then fell back, stilled.

“ _Poe?_ ” she shouted, as she tore off to catch up to him, “ _What happened?_ ”

“Rey!” he half-smiled in greeting, “I _dunno_ , one minute we were going through our checklist and the _next_ , engine 4 starts going _haywire…_ ” he trailed off, his hazel eyes falling onto the small droid, which lay motionless on its side. BB-8’s antenna was bent at an awkward angle and its bodywork was discoloured by a black scorch mark. Poe dropped immediately to his knees, dirt staining his orange flight suit, as the two of them reached where BB lay.

“ _Buddy?_ Come on, _get up,_ ” he pleaded, his voice beginning to sound panicked and his eyes growing frantic as the little droid _still_ did not move. Rey watched him with concern in her eyes, but he _wasn’t helping_ matters. Roughly shoving him out of the way, she immediately set to work, as the pilot sat there dumbfounded by the action. She rolled the small metal being onto its rear and opened up its front port.

“ _Rey?_ _What_ in _kriff_ are you- ” shouted Poe, as he moved to grab her arm to try and halt her. He was taken aback by the ferocity with which she smacked his hand away and instead moved to sit silently on his knees and watch her sure hands began manipulating her way through BB’s parts. He had _never_ seen anyone so resolute about saving a _droid_ \- even one so dear to his own heart. It was _captivating_. Her brows were knitted together in _absolute_ concentration as her fingers reached further inside to seek out the damaged circuits. She gently – _carefully_ – pulled them out and checked them over, seeing carbon staining in one portion. Reaching into her pouch, she found what she was looking for and carefully began to strip off the damaged connections and clean off the staining, before she gently replaced the circuit. Gingerly closing the port, she rolled the droid up and began straightening its antenna out.

Moments passed, yet no movement came from the round droid. Poe met Rey’s eyes with a heartbroken expression. She couldn’t _bear_ the look that was there. He placed his hands on his small metal friend, pulling it gently towards him, “ _Please,_ _buddy…”_ he cried.

Rey could sense the sadness seeping out from him, as he held the little metal sphere, causing a similar twist from her own heart. Instinctively, he reached for her hand and gripped it tightly, so she gave him a reassuring squeeze back. As if hearing its Master’s anguished plea, the small droid’s head slowly rotated, and a flanging series of beeps and whirrs came from it as it came back online.

“ _Oh buddy!_ You had us _so_ worried!” Poe gushed, wrapping the droid into a tight, warm hug.

“ _BB,_ are you _okay?_ ” asked Rey, prompting the droid to swivel it’s optic over to her and respond in a small whistle, “ _Good,_ I’m glad. _I’m sorry I had to…_ ” she said, averting her eyes at having had to invade the small droid’s circuits. A chirruping series of beeps, let her know that the droid was very thankful and was further underlined when Poe pulled her into a hug with them both and without skipping a beat, kissed the crown of her head. Rey’s skin immediately grew very warm and it took her longer than she would have liked to admit, to realise she was blushing, and that Poe still had her in an embrace.

A small happy sounding squeal came from the droid, followed by a sad, low whistle.

“What did BB say - I didn’t catch that?” asked Rey, breaking away slightly.

“ _Oh!_ Uh, BB wanted to thank you like I did, but doesn’t have lips…” Poe laughed nervously, shooting the droid a warning look.

“BB wanted to _what_ , Poe?” giggled Rey, poking him in the chest playfully, her heart fluttering slightly as she caught the look in his eyes. She couldn’t help but enjoy how bashful he suddenly seemed.

The little astromech released another strong of beeps and whirrs, rolling around and into the back of Poe, pushing him forwards.

“ _Cut it out, BB!_ ” he half-laughed through gritted teeth, catching himself before he lurched any further into Rey’s personal space.

“I wouldn’t _mind_ , you know…” she smiled, but not quite sure where her sudden boldness had come from, as she looked up at his handsome face and it’s ‘caught off-guard’ expression. His mouth opened and closed several times, before he turned to look back at BB-8, who merely let out an annoyed beep before smacking into his leg harder. When Poe turned back around, Rey felt heat pooling in her belly at the heat in his gaze, he ran his eyes over her form once, before leaning in towards her and cupping her face gently with his hands.

“ _BB_ says _thank-you_ for _everything,_ ” he smiled crookedly, before he leaned in further and softly connected their lips. Rey couldn’t suppress the shiver she felt as his mouth moved against hers, gently, before he pulled away slowly, “ _I_ wanted to thank you _too_. We didn’t get to say goodbye properly earlier...”

BB-8 released a happy string of whistles as it began to spin around them as they sat there, in a comfortable silence, before they both burst out laughing. The two of them eventually came back to earth and jumped up and away from each other, putting space back between themselves with such speed it would have looked like they had both been shocked.

“ _I_ , uh, _that_ was…” Poe began, reaching up to rub the back of his neck, a dazed look on his face.

“ _That_ was _nice,_ ” beamed Rey, her smile like the sun itself. Poe’s eyes were immediately drawn back to her by it.

“ _Yeah,_ it was,” he agreed, ceasing his nervous tic.

“ _So,_ I guess this really is good-bye this time?” she asked, her smile fading slightly.

“ _Only for now,_ ” he responded, reaching for her hand again and pulling her into a gentle, chaste kiss. Neither caught the pair of eyes watching them from the other side of the landing zone, sharing a knowing look with each other.                                                                                     

                                                                                         

* * *

 

 

_Rey. He had to show this to Rey…_

Ben sensed a ripple of something to him, through the Force. _Happiness._ It felt like Rey.

He could feel her stronger now, like she was coming to him again. A flash of golden light in the distance - like a falling star - alerted him to her arrival and he rose to his feet from where he had sat, waiting. Dusting himself off, he began running towards where he could sense her most strongly, his spirits having raised merely upon knowing she may be here.

He ran. Unrelenting, despite the burning in his feet and the straining of his muscles. He could feel her, closer and closer with each stride, until he could begin to make out her form moving towards him, faintly illuminated in the moonlight.

“ _Ben!_ ” she shouted over, waving her hands so he could pick her out more clearly, her wide smile glinting in the pale glow that bathed the place.

“ _You_ _seem happy,_ ” he noted, as he came to stop before her, bending forwards to rest his hands on his knees, as he tried to catch his breath.

“ _Oh!_ ” she yelped, hoping that the night would cover her evident blush, “I was just glad my friends were okay,” she said, hoping he would not detect her half-truth. “I’m glad to see you’re okay _too…_ what happened?” she asked, her face now frowning at the memory of his disappearance in their last meeting.

“I’m _still_ working that out myself,” he admitted, rising again to tower over her, “but I’m _glad_ to see you too,” he smiled wryly.

“ _What_ were you _doing_ before I got here?” she asked, genuine curiosity in her voice, her feline eyes narrowing as she craned her neck up to look at him.

“ _Something’s happened,_ ” he responded cryptically, turning to look out across the plane, in the opposite direction from where they stood, “ _Come,_ I’ll show you.” He began walking down the sloping dune, catching the sound of Rey quietly padding down behind him.

“ _Show_ me _what?_ ” she shouted to his rear, reaching to grab at the arm of his silver-grey robe.

He paused for a moment, swinging his head and dark locks around to look at her over his shoulder, “ _You’ll see,_ ” he stated, a small smile playing on the corner of his mouth.

Rey gave a roll of her eyes as they continued walking, not catching the smirk that flickered across his face when he sensed her irritation at his non-answer. They walked towards their destination for what felt like hours, Rey asking him questions about this place - what he knew and of his time here.

He had that same small smile on his face every time she asked, enjoying her reactions and their spending time together, finding himself sometimes provoking her into further conversation by being deliberately vague or entirely dodging her questions. When she began to slow in her friendly interrogation of him, Ben decided to switch tact and began to ask her about what had been happening outside of the wasteland they were trudging through. Surprised when she mentioned her growing friendship with the pilot and sensing the affection there, he couldn’t help the twinge within himself, but pushed it away. It was selfish to think she wouldn’t share that affection with others.

His heart flipped at the mention of his mother.

 _She’s still alive,_ Ben thought, joy spreading in his chest at the news. He was also happy at the news of Chewbacca and that his Uncle still survived. Ben was _less_ happy when he sensed the trepidation from her as he asked further regarding Rey’s training.

 _He’s still never fully recovered then,_ he noted, a sadness settling within him that his own failings had affected Rey’s future.

She stopped when she realised he had gone quiet.

Ben slowed and turned to look at her.

“ _What’s wrong, Rey?_ ” he asked, his deep voice raising in question at the end, his face wearing a concerned expression.

“It’s just - this must be hard for you, being stuck here and only ever _hearing_ about the outside world… _unable_ to _be_ in it,” she said, her voice small.

He realised how young she looked in that moment, _how innocent_. There was a flicker of something else from her, but it was gone in an instant.

“It’s _better_ than being _sealed away_ , unable to hear or _feel_ anything,” he responded, honestly and without a hint of bitterness or anger in his voice. He took a step towards her then, his eyes watching hers - trying to judge her reaction to his proximity the entire time – not wanting to make her uncomfortable or push the boundary of their relationship with one another _too much_. When she didn’t move away, he continued. “He _should_ be _teaching_ you, you know,” Ben blurted out, unable to contain his thoughts on her earlier omission – the silence she had increasingly met his questions with saying more than words _ever_ could.

“He’s _afraid_ I’ll become like…” she replied, her voice trailing off, but her meaning no less clear to him.

“Then if he _won’t_ teach you, _I will,_ ” Ben hurriedly continued, his voice even and the genuine look on his face stirring something within her chest.

“ _You would?_ ” she asked, her heart leaping at the openness with which he expressed himself and the honesty she could sense from him.

“ _Of course,_ Rey. _Anything_ ,” he grinned crookedly down at her, pride swelling in his chest to know that she was _considering_ his offer. He felt himself stand a bit taller at that.

“ _Thank-you,_ Ben,” she beamed back at him, before he returned a bright smile of his own. She watched him then, observing the similarities between him and his dark double. Where Kylo was forceful and made her frequently feel _uncomfortable_ , Ben was gentle and never pushed beyond what she was comfortable with. She realised then that Ben was in many ways the total antithesis to the Master of the Knights of Ren, a reflection of who he might have been, had he been able to resist the pull to the Dark side.

“ _Come,_ Rey,” he said, his hand reaching for her, snapping her out of her thoughts, “You _need_ to _see_ this...”

She took his hand and they broke into a sprint towards a soft glow she could only now see on the horizon. Her lungs burned with every breath she took, the chill of the night air even harder on them. The ghostly blue light grew brighter the closer they drew.

“ _What is that?_ ” she shouted over to him, between breaths.

“You’ll see when we get there, something _special_ is happening,” he shouted back, his own chest heaving from the effort to keep moving at such a pace - holding her emerald-hazel eyes for a moment longer than necessary, just because he enjoyed looking into them.

This caused Rey to snap her eyes away, a flush deeper than the one caused by her exertion, rising in her cheeks. When she brought them back up to the spot they were running towards, she could see the light was even brighter now. Something small in the middle was _emanating_ it.

Ben gestured to her for them to stop, Rey coming to a skidding halt next to him, gulping down air as she stretched out her muscles. Ben did likewise, before he nodded his head over his shoulder in front of them and stood again. He stepped softly to the side, letting her take in the sight before her.

She could see it clearly now in the blackened earth. A small sapling, which flickered and shimmered with the Force - like unearthly bioluminescence - rose through the soil. Rey let out a hushed breath, her wide eyes glancing briefly up to Ben’s – who met them with a wide smile.

“What _is_ it?” she breathed; her eyes transfixed again on the pale light.

“ _Can’t_ you _feel_ it, Rey?” he replied quietly, moving to stand directly beside her, tilting his head down to look at her, his expression soft. Closing her eyes, she stilled herself, reaching out gently through the Force. She could feel Ben’s cool, reassuring pulse next to her and then a moment later, she _could_ sense it. A strong, gentle warmth. _Life._

Her eyes flew open, as she met his eyes once more, “ _A Force tree?_ ” she asked, unable to keep the awe from her voice.

“ _Very good_ , Rey,” Ben smiled, down at her, “-but you’re wondering, _how?_ ”

She snorted in amusement at his ability to pre-empt her, “ _Yes,_ _I am._ ”

“When you said you’d had… _interactions…_ with Kylo Ren, I began to wonder if the dead tree you found me sealed inside was a purposeful _symbol,_ ” Ben began, his rich voice holding her attention entirely, “-like a symbol of my – _our_ – guilt at not being strong enough to resist the temptation of the Dark side…”

Rey could feel the sorrow shivering out from him, like cold tendrils in the air, a heaviness in her heart at his forlorn eyes.

“So, _what happened?_ ” she encouraged, bringing him out of his introspection.

“Whatever has happened between you, _your Light_ is beginning to loosen _its hold_ ,” he answered, his warm whisky-coloured eyes holding hers.

“It’s… _beautiful,_ ” she breathed, her eyes resting on the growth flourishing before them.

“ _Yes,_ it is,” he responded quietly, but his eyes were not on the life before them but fixed instead on Rey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BB you sly fox...Ben and Poe both get a bit more time here but rest assured Kylo's reactions will be priceless in the coming chapters!
> 
> A fic I've recently really enjoyed, was 'Across Six Septembers' by bluetoast - I'm a sucker for the old West.
> 
> I used the following tracks when I wrote this: -
> 
> 'Farewell and The Trip' - John Williams - Rey helps Luke down and then Luke and Leia have their goodbye (up to 2:05 only).
> 
> 'Rooftop Kiss' - Poe and Rey fretting over BB (who's much slyer than they give him credit for) and their farewell scene.
> 
> 'Idyll's End' - Ben and Rey travel to where she released him from to the site of the new Force Tree (up to 4:00 only), from "What is it?" to the end of the chapter.
> 
> 'To Know Water' - Austin Wintory - I just liked the sense of wonder to this one :)


	15. Growth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo muses on his last encounter with Rey and is then summoned by his mortal enemy.
> 
> Poe and the Resistance leave Ahch-To behind.
> 
> Ben appraises Rey’s training for himself.

Kylo stirred, his eyes blinking slowly and coming into focus as he lay on his back, the ache in his core almost unbearable. Taunting her had been _so_ enjoyable, but it had been _nothing_ in comparison to how it had felt to be _so close_ to her - to have touched her again.

His skin felt like it had been set alight. He knew then, that something _powerful_ had been kindled within him - an insatiable hunger. Grandfather had been _right_. Kylo didn’t want to resist the pull from her any more. Instead, he _craved_ it.

He would _have_ her.

She would _be his_.

She was not soft and pliant like so many other young women he had encountered - who sought to curry favour by _any_ means necessary. No - Rey was _fierce_ and _unyielding_ , meeting his strength with her own. What he had over her in terms of experience, she made up for in determination and indomitable spirit. He smirked to himself as he pictured her fiery eyes and wild hair, their sabers crossed in a duel, a pleasurable tingle shooting straight to his loins at the thought.

He rose then, ready to cleanse himself and begin his day, disappearing into his wash room to prepare. When he emerged, he could still feel the tenseness below his waist. Choosing to ignore it for the time being, he crossed his chamber to the brushed steel locker fitted into the panelling on the far side - opposite the altar for his idol. Perusing its contents, he selected a black heavy-weave tunic, an asymmetrical charcoal cloak and dark, gun-metal grey pants. Dressing himself, he then slid on his leather boots and gloves, rising again to regard himself coolly in the mirror whilst he clasped the cloak around his shoulders with a heavy silver chain. He had learned this lesson from his mother - that one dressed for how one _wanted_ to be _perceived_. It had stayed with him, even though they he had never seen her again since fleeing from the Jedi temple.

He looked at his reflection, deciding that he had achieved his intention – to appear powerful and intimidating. He had Rey to thank for that. Ever since she had blessed him with his scar, the personnel on the Finalizer gave him an even wider berth than they had done previously. Except for Phasma – who was always careful to avoid her gaze fixing on it, and Hux. As if on cue, the comm cut in with a request for his presence by General Hux, to review the events on Dantooine. Rolling his eyes, Kylo flicked himself one last look, an alien feeling - fleeting - in his chest. It had felt for a moment that he had not been _alone_ in his room. It had felt like his reflection had stared _back_ at him. Like it was watching the ardent Knight of Ren that stood on the other side of the surface. Shaking himself, he stalked out of his room and headed for Hux’s office.

As he strode to the command deck, he was assaulted by a blissfulness that was not his own. _Rey._ Whatever she was doing, he could _feel_ her _so_ strongly – tentative enjoyment and then what felt like-

Jealousy at the affection he could sense emanating from her, tore at him. His face shifted to a sullen scowl instantaneously. He would have laughed at the coincidence, had he realised he was already at Hux’s door. Entering, he could feel the flame-haired General’s eyes on him the moment he crossed the threshold.

“ _Do_ take your time, Lord Ren… it’s not as if I have _anything_ else scheduled for today,” bit the pale-faced young man sitting behind the large desk, which took up almost a third of the sizable room.

“I would _never dream_ of disrupting your day, General…” retorted Kylo as he moved to stand adjacent Phasma, giving her a curt nod in greeting.

“ _Please,_ make yourself at home,” sneered Hux in a smile that was _almost_ sincere, as he gestured for Kylo to sit, before he muttered “you _always_ do…”

“To what _pleasure_ do I owe the _honour_ of being summoned to your office this time?” sneered Kylo dryly, leaning back in his seat - arm loosely propped up on one of the arms - his eyes narrowing in irritation. Phasma shifted almost imperceptibly at his side, something that did not go unnoticed by him, as he turned his gaze from her to Hux.

“I’ve discussed the troubling matter of one of _your_ Knights _turning_ on her allies, Lord Ren,” announced Hux, moving to stand, shifting the dynamic in the room. Kylo’s eyes flashed over to Phasma briefly. “There are residual concerns around the fact that you were _not aware_ of her deployment, that _senior_ First Order personnel engaged in a _common brawl_ during an active mission and a _question_ has arisen around your ability to _lead_ effectively on the battlefield, as a result,” continued Hux, his eyes running over the black clad Knight in derisive assessment.

Kylo’s hand twitched in response, ready to curl into a fist - Hux’s audacity causing sheer rage to pump in his veins. The _weasel_ had clearly taken advantage of Kabira’s violent and power-hungry nature and used it to try to oust him. Kylo had deduced as much after watching how Hux had handled Phasma’s criticism that day and knowing that Hux must have then realised how much he _truly_ needed Phasma, that he had decided to spin what had happened to her men as being the result of Kylo’s inability to command.

 _He’s crafty,_ Kylo acknowledged, _and worse still - he seems to have convinced Phasma._

“And what ‘question’ would that be, exactly?” demanded Kylo, lurching forward, his gaze swinging back to Phasma and then returning to Hux, tone taking on an aggressive edge.

“A question where two of Phasma’s division were found severely injured by one of _your_ Knights – _whom you clearly cannot control,_ ” began the General, raising his hand to cut Kylo off before he continued, “-two troopers who have had to be withdrawn from active duty and may never return to service.”

“Is _that_ all?” laughed Kylo cruelly, face twisting in disbelief as he took in the other two members of command present.

“ _All?_ ” challenged the young General, slamming his hands down onto the desk, “ _No_ that’s _not_ all, Ren! Not only have we had to withdraw those two, but we’ve also had to order the reconditioning of all non-command personnel present to _try_ and erase _another one_ of the many tantrums thrown by you and your Knights’! And that’s just the ones we’ve had to recondition this time, Ren! This has a _time_ and a _money_ value associated with it – or does _nothing_ get through that _dense_ skull of yours?” spat Hux, his pale face turning crimson as his voice grew louder, almost rabid in his expression.

Incensed at the eternal bureaucracy and political manoeuvring Hux so highly valued, Kylo could not stop himself from biting back, “Then _perhaps_ they need _better training!_ ”

Phasma’s helmeted visage snapped round suddenly at this, “ _No_ amount of training can prepare a soldier for what _your_ Knight did to them, Lord Ren.” Her tone was clipped enough to let Kylo know that he had overstepped a mark. Deep down, he knew she was right. He also knew that Hux would no doubt already have passed a report on to the Supreme Leader and that filled Kylo with a creeping dread.

The room having quietened down again, Hux slid his hands over his hair briefly, smoothing himself down as he regained his composure. “Supreme Leader requires an audience with you _immediately_ , Ren, I suggest you make haste. We’re _done_ here. Dismissed,” the venom dripping in his tone,

Kylo could feel the anger boiling in his chest at being ordered around like that. He wasn’t one of Phasma’s troopers. How _dare_ Hux order him around. He also didn’t miss the way Hux’s eyes had moved back to Phasma, their expression ever so slightly softer, like he knew he had made a mistake at the base. One he may _not_ be able to make amends for.

Letting out a huff, Kylo hauled himself out of the chair and headed for the door, using the Force to slam it home behind himself for good measure.

His courage ended there.

Every step he took towards the cathedral-like holo-chamber that Master Snoke reserved for communications chilled his heart like ice.

                                                                                     

* * *

 

 

_I wouldn’t mind, you know…_

Rey’s words played on Poe’s mind as he punched up the switches, firing up the drive now that they had managed to get engine 4 back on-line again. It had taken a while after bringing BB back – for which he would be _eternally_ grateful - but they had worked diligently together, and it hadn’t affected their launch window too much.

His eyes flickered out of the cockpit briefly, watching her retreating form helping her Master back up the winding steps.

_That was nice_

Her sunlight smile was still clear behind his eyes, as he closed them to drink in the tingle still on his lips from their earlier kiss. His peace was disturbed by a sad, plaintive whistle cutting into the helmet comm from his faithful droid. He laughed a little at that. He’d have to thank the little bucket of bolts later. If it hadn’t been for BB, he’d never have met her. _Or got to…_

Another wailing whistle and he had to shush his friend - tone soothing where he could have laughed at them. BB loved people, but he only got _this_ attached to a _very_ select few.

“Shh… _Shh…_ I know buddy, _I’ll miss her too,_ ” he said as he cycled the drive up, the thrusters beginning to roar, “Ha – _alright._ _You_ were _right,_ and _I_ was _wrong._ She _is_ nice,” he smiled crookedly, his eyes glancing over to see if he could still see her, as the nose of the craft began to lift.

Radioing over to the Falcon, he swung the X-Wing a round, bringing it out over the edge of the cliff and whipping his head round to catch sight of the larger craft following more slowly. Eyes moving over to the horizon, he could see the sun beginning to dip below the horizon and then as he moved his head over to the other side, he could just make out Rey and Luke – now having reached the top of the cliffs.

Unable to resist, Poe slowed the engines slightly – allowing the Falcon to pass, before he sped up again, dropping into a shallow dive and wide arc, then coming back around swinging the X-Foils up and down to ‘wave’ goodbye. He hoped that would make her smile her gorgeous smile again. He liked it best when she did. Completing his fly past, he returned to his original course by pulling back sharply on the stick, sending the ship into a tight upward circle, before he swung it to the right, levelling the starfighter off and shooting off into the distance.

Quickly catching up to the Millennium Falcon, he signalled for them to begin to climb - rising through the clouds and not long after - breaking atmosphere. Poe felt most at peace behind the stick of his fighter. If people _were_ designed to do things, _he_ had been designed to _fly_. Everything just _worked_. Spacecraft spoke to him and his X-Wing _sang_. BB was a hell of a flight engineer and one of the best co-pilots he could have hoped for. They knew each other so well that they could normally anticipate each other now, barely having to communicate. That was always harder in a firefight, but his droid was a sturdy _little nugget_ \- that was for sure.

Signalling their cruiser to open the hangar bay, Poe slowed his craft shifting it to a higher level, allowing the Falcon to move ahead and taking up a rear-guard position. Re-checking his scans and satisfied when they still showed no signs of movement, Poe followed the Falcon in to the hangar, turning it in a tight circle and parking it next to Jess’s X-Wing.

He already felt a million miles away from Rey, feeling every moment they had spent together begin to get pushed away as he readied himself to return to full Commander-mode. He would hold on to her smile and the way it crinkled those sharp eyes, just so. And how easily she laughed with him and BB.

Sighing to himself, he sarcastically answered the rap on the cockpit from the flight deck crew with a _rat-at-at-at_ of his own, as he opened it and climbed down the boarding ladders they had fitted. Waiting for BB to eject himself from his docking port, he stood, cross-armed as he took in the activity of the hangar. _Some things never change…_ he thought, as he watched the hive of activity as the General emerged from the ramp of the Falcon - being accosted by various aides and command personnel.

Deciding he should probably go and help, he glanced down at BB to find its large optic watching him strangely, as if waiting for him to say something. Standing there in silence, it dawned on him that his small rotund friend was probably still looking for some reassurance about Rey, “We’ll see her again, little guy, _I promise,_ ” he smiled brightly.

Then, sensing Leia’s growing exasperation at the onslaught she had been met with - having taken no more than a step off the landing ramp – decided to offer her an escape, “ _Besides,_ we’ve got a Princess _here_ that needs rescuing…”

                                                                                     

* * *

 

 

Ben had stood, sneaking sidelong glances at her for as long as she had been admiring the sapling, which twinkled like an earth-bound star.

“ _Thank-you,_ ” she murmured, next to him, “-for showing me this. It’s the most _beautiful_ thing I’ve _ever_ seen,” she smiled.

“You… _like it?_ ” he asked, uncertainty tinting his voice as he tried to cover the elation he felt at her admission. His dark eyes reflected some of the young tree’s light, as he turned to look at her.

“ _I do_ , very much. Where I grew up, there were hardly any plants. It was kind of like here, actually. _Barren._ All I knew growing up were the native berry bushes, which I only came across occasionally. And the rare plants which were sometimes brought in by traders - they didn’t last long at all in _our_ climate though…” she told him, a sad tinge to her voice.

“Where _did_ you grow up?” he asked, catching her off-guard slightly with his sincerity question. She was _still_ getting used to the idea of people being _honest_. Ben had yet to earn her distrust - despite her Master’s apparent misgivings.

“ _Jakku,_ ” she answered quickly, “I was… abandoned there - left behind by my family,” she continued, a slight, watery look entering her eyes, “I always _hoped_ they’d come back…” Ben felt a pang in his own chest at this new information. He _knew_ what that felt like. 

“ _I’m sorry,_ ” he answered, his deep voice quiet, as he took a step towards her.

“Don’t be,” she cut him off, turning away sharply, embarrassment radiating from her in thick waves.

Chewing the inside of his cheek slightly as he decided how best to approach her change in mood, he decided it may be best to change the subject entirely, “ _Well,_ I am. _Now,_ why don’t you bring me up to speed with where you are in your training?” When he sensed a spike of annoyance from her, he realised this had been a mistake, especially when he remembered their earlier conversation on the way here.

Rey looked at him like he had grown a second head.

Trying to diffuse the tense atmosphere that had descended upon them, he grasped blindly for a way to continue their conversation, “He never _was_ very good at teaching _girls…_ ”

Ben hoped she would see it as little more than an aside and _not_ as a slight.

He was surprised when the irked look appeared on her face, how her entire face seemed to protest at the anecdote. “Just _what_ does _being a girl_ have to do with _being a_ _Jedi?_ ” Rey snorted, annoyance heavy in her tone and her caf-coloured eyes like slits.

“ _Absolutely nothing!_ ” laughed Ben nervously, hoping that he could follow that up with something rather wittier and reassuring. “ _Really_ \- he was just _never_ very good at it,” he smiled gingerly, inwardly praying some of its intended comfort had reached his teak-coloured eyes. His heart skipped in relief when her incredulous expression split into a peal of laughter.

He decided he like the sound, as soon as it died down.

Noting a slyness entering her features, Ben waited to see what she would throw at him next, “ _You_ think _you_ would be much better?” she jibed playfully, her eyebrow quirked in challenge.

“Only one way to find out…” he smirked – _so familiarly_ – as he gestured for her to come and join him. This prompted an exaggerated roll of her eyes - so much so that he had to suppress a rumbling chuckle as she trudged to a stop before him, especially when she canted her lean hip out at an angle and folded her arms in bemusement. Rey craned her head to fix him with a glare. Ben blinked a bit at that. Had he not been so keen to prove her wrong, he might have been intimidated by the shorter young woman.

“ _Go on then…_ ” she spoke, eyes flashing with trouble.

Ben’s eyes flicked down to her hip again, but this time were _solely_ fixed on the task at hand. Realising he was looking at her lightsaber, Rey met his gaze with a quizzical look.

“ _May I?_ ” he asked, his deep baritone soft in its question, honest hazel-gold eyes giving her no cause for alarm as he offered her his palm slowly. His eyes trailed down her form as she reached for it, causing her to have a flashback to her encounter with Ren, the similarities between not only their looks – but their mannerisms – unnerving her slightly.

“ _Oh!_ Um… Yes,” she fell over her own wards awkwardly, her fingers suddenly groping clumsily as she tried to unclip the saber hilt from her belt. After several failed attempts, she eventually had success, passing it over to him as if it were nothing more than a tool.  Rey was taken aback by how gently he took it from her hands – his fingers brushing her palm lightly as he did.

She felt his warmth again – _briefly_ \- setting a fluttering in her stomach once more. Watching him, she saw how delicately Ben handled the lightsaber – as if it were a new-born. He glanced up at her briefly, catching her staring at him as if he had just told her there was no such thing as gravity. He grinned sheepishly before he spoke, “This was _my grandfather’s…_ I never thought I’d actually get to-”

“ _Grandfather?_ ” Rey asked - her head cocked to the side - as if the concept were entirely alien to her.

Closing his eyes for a moment and inwardly chiding himself for bringing up family - _yet again_ \- Ben decided to just be honest with her rather than to try to sweeten or soften anything he told her.

“ _Yes._ This is a Skywalker family heirloom, you could say. It was my Grandfather’s – Anakin Skywalker’s – before it passed to my uncle Luke and _then_ to…” he trailed off, his smile fading.

“But I’m not a- _Oh…_ ” She replied, her hand covering her mouth as the realisation hit her then.

“It was _supposed_ to pass to me,” Ben sighed, frowning softly as he ran his thumb lightly over the hilt and pommel. Closing his eyes and letting out a deep sigh, he rose to full height again, handing the blade back to Rey. “But it seems it has found a _new_ Master,” he beamed down, his reaction surprising her.

“Come on then, let’s see what _you_ can _do_ with it…” Ben sniggered, but she could sense from the tremble of happiness that hit her, that it was good-natured.

“ _Alright,_ ” she smiled briefly, before activating the saber and silently running through the forms and stances that Master Luke had been trying to teach her. Ben began a slow circle around her as she did - as if he were judging her performance - pausing every now and then to watch her movements more closely.

When he had finished his review, he shared his thoughts, “He should be showing you so much _more_ than this, Rey. I think we need to work on the forms he’s been teaching you, they’re not working for your… _frame_ \- at the moment - I _don’t_ think that saber is helping either,” he announced, his eyes meeting hers.

“What’s _wrong_ with my lightsaber?” she asked, a frown settling on her features.

“ _Nothing,_ other than that it was made _specifically_ for _someone_. So, it’s not as well suited as a lightsaber you had built for yourself would be,” Ben continued.

“ _I don’t understand…_ ” Rey responded, befuddlement entering her yes.

“For now, we’ll work with what you’ve got,” he answered, holding his hand out in the air, to the side. Moments later, a short, black rod appeared out of a billow of ash-like particles.

“ _What’s that?_ ” she asked, peering to try and get a better look at the object. She was answered moments later when he thumbed at the side and a blade of light shot out, the familiar hum of a lightsaber reaching her ears.

“I’ll need this if I’m going to be able to train you, _will I not?_ ” he smiled, raising his eyebrows slightly with a short chuckle.

“You _really_ mean it?” she asked excitedly, holding her hand out for her own and pulling it into her hand with the Force.

His eyes narrowed as he said in a loud whisper, “I should _warn_ you though - _I’m pretty good!_ ”

She had to suppress a laugh at that, swallowing it down before she retorted, “ _We’ll see…_ ”

Rey leapt back, increasing the distance between them.

 _Okay,_ Ben thought, _let’s see what she does next._

He held his pale white blade steady, in a loose defensive stance. His eyes were locked on her, waiting for any sign of what her next move may be.

Rey, likewise, paced slowly clockwise with her blade now drawn. They stayed in this orbit for several revolutions, until she grew impatient, deciding then to begin probing his defences. He caught sight of a twitch in her shoulder before she launched herself bodily at him with a broad swing of her blade, forcing him to pivot swiftly on his heels to avoid it.

She caught the startled flash to his eyes, before he captured her arm mid swing, using her momentum to pull her off balance into a throw – forcing her to shut her saber off abruptly.

Her honed fight-or-flight instincts kicking in, she tucked herself quickly into a roll, landing on her feet and spinning just in time to catch a jab from him as she stood. Their locked sabers crackling - she could feel his physical strength as they pressed against each other, neither conceding an inch.

Ben noted the set of her angular jaw, as she continued to hold his strike off, sweat forming on her brow. Pushing forward ever so slightly, he saw her eyes widen momentarily, before she slid her blade up slightly, her grip shifting as she moved to deflect him.

 _Good, Rey,_ he noted to himself, as they each took the opportunity to give themselves space. He switched handing, moving to a reversed grip, his blade now held with the pommel facing her and the blade facing to the rear. She’d never seen such a style with a lightsaber, her face belying her awe. Using the opening, Ben rushed her with a series of swift slashes, switching back and forth, putting her through her paces as she swung wildly to knock them off course from their intended target.

Her chest heaving with the effort, she diverted the last of his flurry off to the side but was surprised when he switched handing again – using the momentum to bring his blade back with a powerful diagonal arc. Her boots slid back in the sand as she struggled to remain upright.

“I _did_ warn you…” he laughed, provoking a dismissive snort from Rey as she narrowed her eyes at his self-assuredness.

 _It seems they share that much, at least,_ she observed dryly, noting another similarity between Ben and his other.

Pushing forward again, he roughly jolted her blocking blade, before jumping back and dropping to a ready stance.

 _Come on, Rey, that can’t be all you have…_ he urged her on mentally. He didn’t have to wait too long before she rallied her strength again, lunging for him with a series of sweeps, sending Ben on the defensive in a reversal of their roles. Years of hard practice and training had given Ben the edge, one step ahead of her, where he could read her movements and allowing him to react effectively when he couldn’t. She did have an element of _unpredictability_ though.

Thinking on her feet and instinct beginning to take over, she read their dusty environment. With a sudden pulse of the Force, he was not prepared for what came next. Rey used a powerful pull - channelled between where they stood - to throw up a cloud of sand, limiting his vision for a few seconds and throwing him off-guard long enough to create herself an opening.

He grunted in frustration, acknowledging that she had proven that she was _far_ more resourceful than he’d credited her with being. He _too_ had fallen unwittingly into the trap of underestimating her. He realised he couldn’t afford to a second time as he was knocked from his feet with a low, whirling kick from her. Rolling onto his side and away, he narrowly missed the downward arc of her heel.

 _Heavens,_ he muttered inwardly to himself, _she’s wild._

Jumping onto his feet, he charged her, his heart rate now quickening with exhilaration. It had been _some time_ since he’d been able to _enjoy_ a good spar. _Not since Reina..._  shaking the thought from his head, he had a split second to react before he was defending a mirror of his own earlier tactic.

 _Fast learner,_ he noted amusedly.

Using her last, widest slash, he swung hard intending to use its force to knock her off balance.

She surprised him again when she shut her blade off abruptly and she arched sharply backwards, allowing it to pass harmlessly above her, throwing him off balance instead. Stumbling slightly with the effort to correct his stance, he caught sight of her arching back up out of the corner of his eye. He was too slow to stop her. She darted forward whilst reactivating her blade - it came to a stop _inches_ from his neck.

He swallowed hard – stunned by her finale - not missing the amused crooked smile gracing her face.

“ _What_ was _that_ you were saying earlier?” His heart nearly stopped when she gave him a cocky wink.

“ _Who showed you that, Rey?_ ” he asked aloud, his dark eyes fixed on her in curiosity, piqued by the display of a style he had not seen in _years_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Kylo...
> 
> I do so enjoy writing Ben.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy - things are going to heat up from here :) A big thank you to all of my readers thus far - I want you to know that the kudos/bookmarks/subs and comments really do mean a lot to me and I love hearing from you!
> 
> End Notes: I used the following tracks whilst writing this one:
> 
> 'Anakin's Dream' - John Williams - Kylo's ruminations and reporting in to Hux.
> 
> 'Farewell and The Trip' - John Williams - Poe and the Resistance departing (2:05 onwards).
> 
> 'Forged in Flame' - Michael Salvatori - Rey and Ben marvel at the Force Tree and then Ben agrees to train Rey.


	16. Heat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey grow closer.
> 
> Kylo is summoned by the Supreme Leader and has an intense Force bond session with Rey. 
> 
> Something heated this way comes.
> 
> Please be gentle... *HIDES BEHIND HANDS*
> 
> Warning: Gratuitous hand holding.

Rey stood – her chest heaving with exertion - her blade wavering as they eyed each other warily.

‘ _Who_ showed you _that_ , Rey?’

Her mind raced at Ben’s question. She wasn’t sure _what_ to tell him. How _could_ she?

 _I see a dead girl in my dreams – thought I’d pick up a few things,_ the thought was _utterly_ ludicrous. Shutting her blade back off, she moved to step away from him, to give herself some room to breathe. And _think_.

Ben rose to his towering full height again – his outfit making him appear like a marble pillar - head tilted slightly to the side as he watched her pace in the sand. Dusting himself off, in an effort to put her at ease by making it seem that his attention was elsewhere, his thoughts were nonetheless on the troubled young woman before him. His golden-flecked eyes darted to her each time her back was turned to him, but he refrained from trying to reach out for her consciously through the Force. That was _too_ intimate for now. He would not initiate - despite his yearning for that same connection they had shared when they had first met.

 _Some_ courage having finally returned to her, Rey turned back towards him and the look he met her with nearly stole the words from her. She took a moment to still herself, pursing her lips. “I don’t know _where_ to begin,” she announced, toeing at the dusty earth below her boot.

He smiled lightly, before the quip fell from his mouth, “ _…Somewhere_ near the beginning would be good.” Rey’s face scrunched up with an annoyed huff at his comment, but it did provoke a response from her, which had _entirely_ been his intention.

“ _Fine!_ I’ve been having these… _dreams…_ ” she began. Trying to order her thoughts, she hadn’t noticed him moving closer to her until his voice was louder than it had been before. “-Of a young woman that Master Luke had trained. _Of Kylo Ren._ _Of you…_ ”

Ben’s eyes widened at her flustered admission, the words not fully registering for a moment. She had confirmed his suspicions though. She had seen Reina. _And them_. It disturbed him to a degree. Then their eyes met again, and he nodded for her to continue.

“I didn’t know _what_ to think at the start, but the more I saw and… _experienced…_ the less _certain_ things seemed to me…” she breathed, hesitancy in her voice. Her amber-green eyes flickered back to him, as if the sight of him grounded her and she resumed her pacing. Ben settled himself down on the sand, flopping into a seat, stretching his long legs out in front of him and sliding his hands half into the sands behind him, as he continued to listen to Rey recount everything she could.

“Less certain, _how?_ ” he asked quietly, tilting his head towards her in question, the shift in his position rippling his onyx waves.

“I… Feel like sometimes I can _relate_ to him – _to you,_ ” she corrected herself quickly, hoping she hadn’t caused him offence. She wasn’t sure _how_ to approach this. _Are Ben and Kylo the same person?_ She wondered, _or was one truly dead and the other an unfortunate soul, trapped within the body they had both once shared?_

“Compassion isn’t anything to be _ashamed_ of, Rey,” Ben offered with a bashful smile. Rey could see clearly the sadness in his eyes, flashing her back to the younger boy with the mop of hair looking up at her with embarrassment plain on his features. Well, _not her_ – but she _had_ seen it. His expression twisted in her heart like a knife. _Stars… this whole situation is enough to make my head spin,_ she grumbled inwardly.

“ _I know_ , I just – I don’t feel I _should_ , not after what I’ve seen him _do…_ ” Rey responded - her voice wavering with emotion - she turned away from him to prevent him seeing how conflicted she was. She wrapped her arms around herself in a half-defensive, half-comforting gesture – curling in on herself. She heard the sand rustling behind her and cast a glance over her shoulder and found Ben was now lying flat on his back, completely stretched out, his limbs spread-eagled and eyes up to the sky.

“What on _earth_ are you doing?” she asked, nose scrunching up once more in bemusement.

“I’m _thinking,_ ” he answered, his voice flat and distant, as if he weren’t fully present.

“But _why_ are you on your _back?_ ” she pressed, padding back over to him to sit down a few feet away, kicking off her boots and pulling her knees up to her chest, her arms wrapped round them and chin resting atop.

Lazily craning his neck up, he looked at her as if she were asking the most _obvious_ question in the world, “Because I think better lying down…” he muttered, before he dropped his head back onto the sand.

Rey snorted in disbelief, she had yet to decide _who_ was _stranger_ : Ben or Kylo? Ben was certainly full of strangeness, but she found most of it amusing. _Perhaps it ran in their family?_  Rey thought, _Master Luke was the same - Leia seemed to be the only normal one amongst them - well, aside from Han. Han…_

She wondered if Ben _knew._

 _He must know, mustn’t he?_ She asked herself silently.

As if sensing what she was thinking, Ben spoke - his voice seemed small, but Rey listened – _rapt_ , “I used to sit out in the fields with my father, as a child, to watch the clouds drifting by in the day. At night, he told me different stories about all the stars in the sky,” he paused for a moment and Rey watched him swallow thickly. He was open to her in the Force, but she felt as if he were holding himself back, as if this was _painful_ for him. “I loved those stories _so_ much... my mother was always so busy- my father was around more when I was little, he made me feel like I could go anywhere. _Be anything..._ ” he continued after another pause. She wanted to comfort him. She could sympathise. She _too_ had lost a family.

Rey didn’t make a sound, but she began to unwind herself from her pseudo-defensive curl and edged over to where he lay. His watery bronze eyes were fixed on the sky which was now dimming with the dipping ghostly sun. He let out a deep breath but seemed to be a bit more settled knowing she was there.

“It _broke_ his heart when I was sent away,” he breathed shakily, “ _I was his world…_ ”

Rey turned on her side instinctively to look at him, sensing the pain that he bound within himself, the struggle to contain it. Kylo must have felt this pain too, but where Ben seemed to be sensitive and gentle, she questioned now if it was that _same_ pain that had twisted Kylo into the heartless individual she knew. She watched Ben for a while, a quiet having fallen between them. “ _I’m sorry,_ ” she whispered into the evening air.

“ _Don’t be_ ,” he answered, with a low rumble of his rich voice, “he’s with the Force now.”

“I _am_ though,” she responded lowly, her soft gaze fixed on his regal profile, as he continued to stare upwards.

Hearing what she had said, he slowly rolled on his side to face her. His thickly lashed eyes locked with hers and a faraway look flashed across his features, before he answered her.

“ _Thank you,_ ” he breathed.

They lay there, facing each other, in a comfortable silence until Ben rolled onto his back again. Rey later followed.

They were _inches_ apart now.

Rey ran the cool sand between her fingers, to try distracting herself from dwelling on things, noting that it was much finer than that on Jakku. It had a consistency almost like that of flour, but fractionally heavier.

Ben shifted.

His fingers ghosted hers before moving away, only to return a moment later and tentatively sit next to hers in the sand, causing her pulse to quicken. Rey blinked - she could feel the heat radiating from him now, in the cold night air. The comforting soothe that his touch seemed to have on her. _He must have felt it too,_ she realised, as he didn’t retreat.

An alien feeling began to build within her, warm and like her senses had been set alight.

His fingers reached for hers in no accidental movement and the feeling increased.

A curious fluttering had spread to her stomach and she could feel her chest and face begin to grow warm. A strange _pressure_ had wound its way through her _entire_ being.

Unbidden, her mind drifted to being pressed beneath Kylo, the heat that had radiated from him _too_.

Her eyes fluttered shut as her mind began to wander when she felt Ben’s fingers knotted loosely with hers.

                                                                     

* * *

 

 

Kylo stood before the large, polished iron-hued doors to the holo-chamber. He was steeling himself before he entered, drawing himself every piece of his mental armour he could muster before facing his Master. He _knew_ he would _not_ be pleased. He was never pleased when there was a _lack_ of progress and Kylo could not afford any falter in the slow progress he had been making back into the Supreme Leader’s good graces.

Taking a step toward the door, they slowly parted inwards, a sound like stone grinding on stone as they moved. Kylo strode inside purposefully, hoping that an outward display of confidence would ward off any suspicion from his Master, whilst he concentrated almost singularly on his mental defences.

Dropping into a kneel with his head bowed, the familiar flicker of light in his peripheral vision heralded his Master's arrival.

“Master of the Knights of Ren, what _news_ of your mission?” boomed the Supreme Leader’s voice, echoing within the large, metal-buttressed room.

“We have wiped the Resistance from the face of Dantooine, my Master,” Kylo began, his eyes still averted. He would not rise before he was bid.

“ _And the girl?_ ” Snoke demanded, seemingly more interested in that matter than the prior.

“There was no trace of her there…” Kylo admitted, unable to conceal the disappointed edge to his tone.

“ _Disappointing,_ my apprentice - but then, you have _fallen_ so _far_ it was only to be _expected…_ ” sneered the Supreme Leader, his timbre dripping with derision.

The words stung Kylo as if he had _actually_ been struck.  _So,_ _my efforts were for nothing…_ he thought, bitterly.

“I _have_ seen her again, Master! I just need your _guidance_ on how to use these – meetings – to locate her,” Kylo blurted out, a desperation to his voice. Feigned or not, he had not had any guidance on how to track her down from Grandfather yet. So, he decided his next best option was to use the Supreme Leader’s eagerness to capture the girl for his _own_ purposes.

“You can find her simply enough in the bond... but her physical location _evidently_ still _eludes_ you,” leered Snoke, his hands spreading like claws across the arms of his throne. His pale face twisted into a grim scowl as he regarded Kylo’s submissive pose.

“It would appear so, Master," responded Kylo, careful to keep his tone more supplicant. He decided then to lay on the charm and begin to stoke his Master’s ever-large ego, “I need your _wisdom_ , Master. I can’t break through her mental defences alone... but she seems caught off-guard whenever we’re near…” He tilted his head up sharply when he heard a dark laugh bubble its way out of the cruel rictus grin that had contorted the deformed face of the Supreme Leader.

“ _Oh,_ my wayward apprentice... for one your years, you are _incredibly_  naive in the ways of the world,” he cackled, causing himself to cough from the effort, “She is but _a woman_ \- a Force user and a _powerful_ one at that - but her _biology_ may work in our favour…”

“Tell me _how_ , Master,” Kylo asked, summoning as genuine an expression as he could and channelling the primal desire that he had to find her, into it.

Still laughing - punctuated by hacking coughs - Snoke beckoned Kylo Ren to stand, his normally imposing height dwarfed in comparison to the huge hologram of his Master.

“I can _feel_ it from you, like a cur after a bitch in heat,” drawled the Supreme Leader, his eyes running perversely down the form of the young Sith Lord. “No doubt _she_ must _feel_ it too… The bond _pulls_ at you both, trying to bring you together despite the distance. _Use_ that. _Use her want. And yours._ ”             

Kylo gulped deeply, hoping the higher collar of his tunic largely hid it, as his Master’s cold grey eyes locked firmly on his.

“ _Seduce her…_ ” he commanded Kylo, before his hologram flickered out of view.

Kylo’s heart thundered in his ears as he stood alone in the cavernous room. His Master had _seen_ through _him_. He _knew_ Kylo _wanted_ her. _A Jedi._

Anger flared within him - half at himself for having been so foolish as to have thought he could deceive his Master and half at her for having _tainted_ him with her Light. With this _bond_. Turning on his heel, Kylo stormed off to his training room, his boots pounding off the flooring all the way there. Having felt some of his annoyance had been sated by smashing a half-dozen of the new droids, he eventually marched off to his room a few hours later.

Stalking into his chambers, he sat himself at the end of his bed, clawing his hands into his thick dark hair as he sat with his head in his hands. He sat like that for an age, until he decided he should try to settle himself. He quickly stripped himself down to his undergarments and lay back on the luxurious insulated fabric which covered his bed.

Absentmindedly, Kylo hadn’t realised he had resumed the position he had lain in so often as a child. He lay there spread-eagled and staring at the ceiling due to the lack of stars within his room. He wondered where she _was_ right now. He could feel the exhaustion tugging at his eyes until he finally decided to rest them.

He lay there, running his fingers over the smooth, soft fabric, until he began to imagine it was something else entirely.

 _Would her skin be soft?_ he found himself wondering. He decided there would be parts of her that were, as he pictured her bare, tanned legs. A shot of heat rocketed to his loins at the thought.

His mind flashed back to her pinned beneath him, her pretty face a mask of defiance as she strained against him, prompting another deliciously electric jolt to his nethers. Her skin had been flushed, he remembered. A bead of sweat had trickled down the curve of her elegant neck and disappeared into the folds of her clothing at her breasts as she continued to fight against him. He felt the tightening in his garments and _knew_ how badly he wished then that he had _acted_ on his desires at that moment.

Kylo’s eyes snapped open as he did – he _felt_ her there – _with him,_ but not. She _too_ was feeling this desire at this moment. It _thrilled_ him.

He could feel a _quiver_ through the Force to him, from Rey. _She must be with someone,_ he thought jealously, but when he sensed no other presence, he felt an elation he had not felt in a long time. He closed his eyes, settling himself for a minute, until he felt a sensation like someone were hesitantly running their fingers over the bare skin of his chest. It was _electric_.

 _Is she experiencing this with me?_ He wondered, drinking in the feeling, _-because of me? Does she secretly want me as I want her?_ He _knew_ she felt their connection. He had known it in his _bones_ by the look of sheer terror on her face when he had announced to her that he felt it too.

A shiver ran up his spine as he felt her like a _trembling_ all around him. He closed his eyes again and imagined her there, now pressed below him, imagined himself grinding against her. How she would deny it aloud until her denial became a breathy moan, as he kissed at that neck that _taunted_ him so. How _he_ would evoke a feeling in her she had felt with _no_ other. How he would make her cry out for him – for _him_ and him _alone_.

Sensing what felt like her ecstasy, he could hold himself back no further – yearning to leave a trail of searing kisses down her flesh. He imagined then that when she could take it no more, he would reward her with a pleasure he told himself only _he_ could give her. He _burned_ for her – groaning as his hands grasped at his sheets in fists, exhilarated and frustrated in his arousal all at once.

His heavy breathing slowly returning to normal, he lay there, feeling triumphant in the knowledge that he had _sensed_ her _thirst_.

Sensed her _crave_ him. 

                                                                                       

* * *

                                   

Rey's eyes snapped open, feeling how flush her skin had grown, with a slick layer of sweat on it.

Her body felt  _wonderful_.

Rolling her head to the side, she noticed suddenly that Ben was gone.  _Had he sensed what I had been dreaming about?_  She wondered, her heart sinking at the thought.

She lay there in the desert alone.

She felt  _dirty._

She felt a hunger for _more._

It _terrified_ her and _excited_ her all at once.   

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well… hope that wasn’t too much for anyone… it’s only going to get worse for them both from here on out!
> 
> As always – thank you to all my readers. Your comments/kudos/subs and bookmarks keep me engaged with this story 😊 Love hearing from you guys! Let me know what you thought of the last few chapters!
> 
> I've written to the following tracks for this chapter: -
> 
> ‘Prophecy Theme’ - Toto - Ben and Rey puzzle the riddle of her and Kylo’s bond and Ben tells Rey some of what he remembers from the past.
> 
> 'Anakin's Dark Deeds' - John Williams - Kylo communes with his Master and then dreams of Rey


	17. Smoulder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey’s side of the intense Force bond session.
> 
> Kylo reflects on what has happened and what he’s planning for.
> 
> Ben thinks on about his own feelings.
> 
> Poor Kylo. Poor Rey. Poor Ben.
> 
> DANGER – Something somewhat smutty and angst ahead!

Rey’s thoughts had drifted from Ben to Kylo and back again as she lay there with Ben in the cool night sand. She told herself that its chill was the cause of the goose bumps she now felt on her skin. She knew she had grown _fond_ of him, that much even _she_ could not deny, but the confusion she felt over the sensations now flooding her left her feeling so _very_ conflicted. As she gazed into his dark depths, she had a flashback to the moment he had kissed her. Well, _not her_ , but the dead girl who he had loved.   _Did it really matter?_  she thought grumpily, _she_ had still felt it.

Her lips tingled and her heart leapt and fluttered every time she recalled the feeling. Whether she had _truly_ felt it or had simply been affected by the emotions she had sensed from them in that memory, part of her acknowledged that she had _allowed_ herself to be swept away by it. She had _felt_ his desire for her. The nervous excitement. It had been overwhelming and world-shaking, and she had _loved_ it.

She couldn’t help the cold, sharp pain in her chest. The _longing_. _How can I ever compare to someone like that?_ Rey huffed quietly. _Does he think of me, when we’re not together?_ she wondered inwardly, her stomach increasingly in knots.

Then her thoughts drifted back to Kylo again. Of how close they had been. How he had told her he _understood_. She heard his deep, sensual voice in her head, his last words to her echoing within her very marrow.

‘You are _special,_ Rey…’

She frowned as she thought of it. He was like a dark reflection of the young man who now watched her, whose reassuring hum in the Force grounded her and brought her some small measure of peace.

“What’s _wrong_ , Rey?” asked Ben, his soft tone snapping her from her thoughts, “You’re frowning.”

Her eyes flickered up to his, watching as he inched closer over on his side, using his elbow to drag himself nearer. Ben let out a slight sigh as his eyes ran over her face, his fingers ghosted hers before moving away, only to return a moment later and find themselves back across from hers in the sand - like he had deliberately reached for her. This simple act caused her pulse to quicken. She could _feel_ the warmth of him - like a fire in the night. The gentle salve his brief touch had brought.

Ben _must_ have felt it too, for he didn’t remove his hand.

A warmth pooled low in her belly, with a following shiver creeping up her spine.

His fingertips brushed against hers and the sensation intensified - making her head light - but not uncomfortably so.

Rey could feel a heat spreading outwards from below her belly and up her chest, her heart crying out for him to increase their contact.

As he reached for her, a mental image of when Kylo had pressed her into the sand prompted her to let out a quiet gasp as she recalled how hot he had been at each point their skin connected. The _look_ that had been in his eyes.

Her eyes fluttered shut and her mind began to wander when she felt Ben’s fingers knotted loosely with hers. He gave a gentle squeeze and it was like she was lying in a pool of warm water - _comfortable_ and _safe_. She could _feel_ his presence all around her. Rey wanted to hold onto this. To _cherish_ it.

But it didn’t take long for Ben’s dark counterpart to creep into her daydream – silent as a shadow - as she lay there. She imagined his wolfish gaze upon her again, as he had pinned her below him. How much more powerful than her he had been. It had frightened her. It had _excited_ her. Rey gulped heavily, the noise of it loud within her head.

She could feel Ben still, beside her, his deep slow breaths constant and calming. However, as she thought more of Kylo, she felt Ben growing more distant - like he was sinking into the background.   _Fading._

Not sensing Ben’s _actual_ fading into the night air - like dust in the wind - Kylo’s presence in her mind seemed to grow. It grew stronger by the second. Her brows knitted together as she remembered herself beneath him again, how she had struggled against his greater physical strength. She could feel the sticky beads of sweat on her neck and sense his smouldering gaze upon her - like burning coals.

His hands in this - _dream_ \- this time slid down her arms, at an _agonisingly_ slow pace, drawing out the quiver it sent through her. One that sent a strange sensation to her loins. Rey felt her breathing grow deeper and less frantic. She could feel her normally steely determination loosening. His fingers were like fire on her skin, his eyes drinking her in. Everywhere his fingertips moved to, seemed to kindle the feeling within her further alight.

Unconsciously, her fingers skimmed her inner thigh, causing her to let out a low whine at the feeling.

Rey could sense a tentative pulse from him through their bond. It _was_ Kylo. Part of her knew this was _wrong._ They were opposites. He was a _Sith._  She was _trying_ to become a _Jedi_. But a _deeper_ , _baser_ part of herself whispered that he felt it too. He _wanted_ her. _Terribly._

She could sense no deceit to it. He _had_ been the _first_ to note some strange connection between them - all those months ago on Starkiller. That connection had only grown over time, much to her chagrin - at least at first. She _should_ have despised it - Force _knows_ she had questioned it and decried it for months - but her increasing interaction with both _him_ and _his spectral counterpart_ had led her to review her stance.

 _If I push Kylo away, will I lose Ben?_ She wondered as the handsome, kind smile of Ben flashed behind her eyes.  It only bolstered her confusing and increasing sense of _need_ and she was soon after dragged into thinking of being pinned below him. Tentatively – cautiously – she imagined running her fingers over the taut planes and muscles of the bare chest she had glimpsed under Ben’s robes during their sparring. Then, she pictured a stormy, lustful look had entered his eyes and he was Ben _no_ more - _only Kylo_. As if sensing the building arousal that she felt, she imagined that he ground against her, prompting a breathy moan to fall from her lips. His hands traced up her abdomen and ribs – to which her muscles spasmed in delight and she saw herself arch into him – letting out a sudden, high-pitched sigh. She found herself compelled by the urge to increase everywhere their skin was in contact. _Was this how he had felt with her?_ Rey half-thought, her mind too preoccupied to linger on it for long.

She thought of a dark smirk spreading on his features, as she imagined their eyes briefly connected. Kylo’s right hand slid from her breast - _tingling_ in _anticipation_ – trailing it languidly down her right side and past her outer thigh, causing her to let out a disappointed huff. The image of him letting out a rumbling laugh into her neck, filled her mind before his soft – but forceful - lips descended onto it fully, leaving a trail of searing skin in their wake. She _felt_ his touch inching up her inner thigh toward her core. She willed him on, inwardly, cursing every second he dragged it out.  

She _needed_ him.

_Now._

Reaching it, he moved to pass it by completely, causing her to let out another cry of annoyance.    Imagining catching sight of a predatory smile from him, she felt him brush her inner thigh softly with his fingertips, before he gently began to stroke _nearer_. _And nearer_. As he drew a long, languishing whimper from her throat, she thought she could feel a hardness pressing into her, below where his attention was currently focused. As he doubled his efforts, Rey could feel herself - so _painfully_ close to the edge – that she visualised it forcing her to clutch him tightly. To hold onto him like he was her tether to reality, and she were about to float off to the heavens without him.

She envisaged wrapping herself around him even tighter as he began to rock against her - _with purpose_ \- a fleeting but intoxicating phenomenon enflaming her every time he connected. She had _never_ felt this before. It was like a cord being ever-tightened – the tension _pleasurable_ , yet _unbearable_ , at the same time. Then - without warning – she conjured him slowing his pace, his hips rolling into her more gently and she felt like _Ben_ had returned. He looked down at her and his face had seemed to change back - her heart less heavy now. She pictured his eyes softening, and she felt herself burrowing into his broad chest, a happy fluttering beginning to enter her loins and heart.

She imagined him turning to her and dropping his head into the crook of her neck, his pace beginning to pick back up and Rey felt herself begin to shatter around him, letting out a quavering moan as the universe seemed to unravel behind her eyes.

Rey felt like she was _glowing_.  She felt _wonderful_.

He shifted slightly, rolling off her gently to the side, she was met with _Kylo’s_ face. Yet, he had _Ben’s_ eyes. _And smile._

It should have _terrified_ her more than it did.

Her eyes blinked open slowly as she lay on her side facing away from Ben and were met with the night sky over the dunes in the distance. Her skin was still hot and glistening with sweat. Her hand was half under her lower robes and her fingers were slick and warm. Her sense of ecstasy had yet to dissipate. As she came to more, she rolled her head to the side and noted that Ben was now gone.

A sense of shame washed over her, as she wondered if he had _seen_ or _sensed_ what she had just felt. Her heart sank.

She lay in the sand alone, feeling _dirty_ \- feeling an insatiable _hunger_ for _more_.

The longing returned.

                                                                                              

* * *

 

 

Kylo lay on his sheets, his breathing slowly returning to normal, relishing the small victory in having drawn such desire out of the feral _minx_.  She _hungered_ for _him_. As _thirsted_ for _her_. He had been _vindicated_.

He lay for a few more moments, before he decided to go and clean himself off after his earlier exertions. He would hold onto every sensation and sight from _that_ encounter for some time. He never knew when they would next meet. Striding towards his wash room, he quickly turned the fresher on before stepping inside and closing the door behind him.

Rey was _singular_. She was his _opposite_. Yet they were _drawn_ together, by this powerful attraction that had only grown from the moment he had met her. Rey was fierce, beautiful and of an incredible resilience.   _She’s strong in the Force - not as strong as I - but if she could only master it, we would be unstoppable,_ he thought as the cool water ran through his obsidian mane and down his back. _We could truly finish what Grandfather had started._ They could rebuild a _better_ Galaxy. They could make a _difference_. They could _rule_ together.

He shook himself a bit at where his thoughts had taken him, but as he turned them over and over in his mind, they made more and more sense. She _was_ his _match_ in more ways than _not_. She had returned his attraction. He had just _felt_ it. If only he could make her see, her current path would only lead to ruin. The Jedi were _not_ the great peacekeepers they had believed themselves to be - Grandfather had tried to show them that and they had not listened, forcing him to change his destiny forever.

  _Yes,_ Kylo nodded to himself as he turned the fresher off, _we would make an unstoppable pair._ Stepping out of the unit, he reached for his soft chamber robes and shrugged them on. Reaching to towel off his hair, he caught his face in the mirror and nearly jumped back when it seemed to flicker briefly into a gentler version - one that had _not_ suffered the years as _he_ had. His expression darkened, as did the one that met his gaze in the mirror, but its eyes held Light.

 _Damn her,_ he thought, yet there was little bitterness to it. Yes, she had tainted him with her Light, but he felt that he had awakened a Darkness in her. She had _lusted_ for him - he knew all too well that _that_ was not the way of the Jedi. He couldn’t help the victorious smirk that spread across his face. The eyes in his reflection however, looked as if his heart had been broken.

Shaking his head slightly, he was met with his own eyes again and giving the mirror a second glance, told himself that it was merely his eyes playing tricks on him.

As he exited the wash room, a ping from his comm came through. Letting out an irritated growl, he crossed the room to answer it, “ _Yes?_ What is it?” he near barked at the interruption.

“ _General Hux_ , Sir, he’s asking if there were any...   _orders..._ from the Supreme Leader during your… _‘review’_ …” came Mitaka’s jumpy voice in response.

Rolling his eyes to himself in annoyance, Kylo took a breath before he spoke, “You can tell him, Lieutenant, that there are _none_ that concern _him_. _Is that clear?_ ”

“ _Crystal,_ Lord Ren,” replied the nervous young Lieutenant hurriedly.

“ _Good._ Now, _hurry off,_ best not keep him waiting…” sneered Kylo, before he abruptly shut the comm off. Sighing, he eyed his bed once more, it now having become a much more enticing prospect as a wave of tiredness hit him. Especially when his mind wandered briefly back to Snoke’s edict - and as a result - back to Rey.

 

* * *

 

Ben’s heart felt as if it were made of lead.

Just as he had felt himself and Rey deepen their bond - when he had _sensed_ she _wanted_ him to reach out for her - he had been dragged from her once more. It was not as painful as it had been the last time - but only slightly less so.

Worse still, he could _feel_ himself drift back to her for a few brief seconds, only to be torn from her once more. He _knew_ she felt affection for him, he had _sensed_ it from her, as he had begun to try to return it. Yet, he had tried to keep it in reserve at the same time, still worried that he would be overstepping a mark.

He hadn’t realised that she _truly_ cared for him until she had tried to comfort him, as they lay next to each other - after he had told her about his father. The sorrow he had felt from her when he had mentioned him. _Had she known him?_ he wondered to himself.

Then, their fingers had wound together, and it had felt as if some of the pain of having lost Reina had _finally_ started to go. Like a weight had been lifted. Rey was pure and innocent and good. She had made him feel less - _broken_ \- than he had in a long time. He had  _felt_ her.

He could feel himself falling for her, he had just chosen to deny it for this long, partly out of fear of scaring her off and partly out of respect for Reina.

_Reina…_

He wondered what she would make of all of _this_. She had always been so much more in tune with the will of the Force, than he had. So much more _accepting_ of it. Regret burned in his chest when he remembered how she had accepted her fate. Accepted it so gracefully. Courage to the end, to try and prevent harm befalling the others. He had been locked inside himself. Chained to bear witness, yet unable to do _anything_ other than _watch_. Forced to watch as the Darkness that had overtaken his heart had cut her down.

He _couldn’t_ let that happen to Rey.

He _would_ not.

She was _precious_.

He would not let Darkness consume her, feeling a masculine swell of protectiveness in his chest when he decided he would defend her - _with his life_. He would train her. He would help her protect _herself_. Even from _him_ \- from _both_ halves of himself, if he had to.

Ben let out a quiet, bitter laugh as the realisation hit him - his head dropping down to his knees as he crouched in the dark sand. He was _going_. He had been _going_ for a while and it had only just now reached through his thick skull.

He knew then that he was _falling_ _in love_. He felt as if Rey reciprocated - even in part - and that gave him _hope_. Something he had not had since Reina. Ben felt now as if he could begin to let go of her. It was time – it had been for many years. Perhaps, Rey could heal his heart - she had already achieved something _impossible_ by releasing him from his prison...

Rey was special. He knew that from the moment he had set eyes on her. Her smile, her eyes, the face she would pull when she thought he was doing something ridiculous. All these things were things he cherished about Rey - that kept him going through the long, lonely nights until they would meet again. It dawned on him then that he _longed_ for her, that he counted down the moments until she would find him again.

He wondered if she felt the same way about him, _even a little_. _Force,_ he admonished himself, pressing the heels of hands into his eyes until the colours flickered on his inner eyelids, _I feel so juvenile right now…_

Then he remembered how amazing it had felt when their fingers had connected, sewing together, like two halves of a whole. She had opened herself up to him, he could feel her - _sense_ her.  She had _wanted_ it too. She hadn’t pulled away or closed herself off as he had worried that she would.

He had wanted to stay there. _With her._ To enjoy that moment.

Some part of him, deep down inside, had felt something reawaken within himself. He now wanted to pursue more contact with her. To feel how her hair felt between his fingers. How her skin felt beneath them - if she would smile when he ran them over her. He hoped that her eyes would look up at him with that beautiful Light, as he would reach down to cup her face and bring her lips, gently, to his.

He felt embarrassed at thinking of her like this, but a voice at the back of his mind told him that she felt it _too_. That _she_ was falling for him as he was for _her_. He brought his head up briefly as he sat there, before he sank back onto his hands and then flopped spread-eagled into the sand - adopting the position he had when he had been with Rey.  He told himself it was so that he could think.

He felt his fingers tingling slightly as he remembered when they had connected.

He _knew_ then that he was in _deep_.

He had already _fallen_.

That he would fall _further_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gratuitous thinking.
> 
> Gratuitous realising.
> 
> End Notes: I've written to the following tracks for this chapter: -
> 
> 'Haunted' - Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross - Rey's daydream turns into a dark fantasy.
> 
> 'What Have We Done to Each Other?' - Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross - Kylo reflects on his fantasy.
> 
> 'Confluence' - John Williams - Ben thinks about his interactions with Rey.
> 
> Look at that – a double-chapter as a thank you to all my readers. Your comments/kudos/subs and bookmarks keep me engaged with this story 😊 Love hearing from you guys! Hope you’ve bene enjoying the story so far? 😊


	18. Clash

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Resistance begin their counterattack on the First Order.
> 
> Rey and Luke really spar this time and Master Luke sheds some light on Rey’s situation.
> 
> The Finalizer jumps into the fray

Poe strode onto the bridge - ready for the sitrep - following their return to the flagship of their flotilla several days ago. He’d been _itching_ to get back into action since the attack on Dantooine, keeping himself busy and running over every _inch_ of his X-Wing with BB since the engine trouble before dust-off on Ahch-To. They’d pored over it for two days and had almost finished when the briefing had been called. Leaving his trusty little engineer to complete the ship’s service, he’d headed off.

 _Finally,_ he thought to himself as he crossed the room, nodding in acknowledgement to the rest of the assembled Resistance command. A sharp series of taps from Leia’s cane brought them all to attention. “As you all know - just over a week ago - our outpost in Dantooine was attacked by the First Order. The base was destroyed, and the survivors were hunted down and systematically _eliminated_ ,” the small grey-cloaked and commanding woman began, “-Following review of all available enemy telemetry from our intelligence network, we have _confirmed_ the location of a refuelling station near Jakku.” Turning to cast a glance off to the side, she nodded to Lieutenant Connix - one of her closest attendants.

A split second later, a hologram of the same star system sprang into life before them. “The attacking force have been tracked on a trajectory to _this_ location,” she continued, eyes scanning over the crowd. A bright white dashed line began to plot onto the hologram, charting a course between their current position - a few hours hyperdrive journey out - and the First Order detachment and station. “What’s our plan then? To hit the station and _prevent_ them refuelling?” asked a Chiss senior officer leaning on the other side of the holo-table, crimson eyes seeming to glow - even in the dim light. “ _Elegant,_ ” noted Leia, appreciation in her tone, “but _not_ the plan this time…” she smiled slyly.

“Care to _enlighten_ us then, General?” grinned a young pilot – Jessika Pava – clearly eager to get into a cockpit and down to business.

“ _Instead,_ ” continued Leia, “I delayed our disembarkation from Ahch-To slightly until the data could be confirmed by at least _three_ reliable sources,” she paused for a moment, waiting as the trajectory data was updated for both sides. Sensing the growing anticipation within the room and catching a nod of support from her favoured Wing Commander, Leia delivered the tactical data. “We will be met by the 3rd fleet under Vice-Admiral Holdo and Admiral Statura’s 5th fleet - for support - when we strike the refuelling station and the First Order ships in the area,” she announced, leading to a ripple of whoops and cheers before she raised her slender hand to silence the meeting again. “We expect heavy fire, so I want _everyone_ in the air _in_ and _out_ following each bombing run. X-Wings will be providing covering fire and taking out defence turrets so that the Y-Wings and the heavy bombers can do their jobs - _no_ unnecessary _theatrics,_ ” she ordered – firing a stern look at Poe then. Returning her gaze to the others assembled she addressed them all once more, “Look out for each other - for those next to you,” she said, then finishing, “ _Give ‘em hell!_ ”

The room reverberated with cheers, before the command members rushed off to their duties. Poe cut through the dwindling numbers to where Leia stood, balancing both hands on her cane.

“ _Outstanding,_ ” he grinned down at her, as she watched the last of the command leaving.

“Just take care of _your wing_ , Dameron. I don’t want to _lose_ anyone today if I can _help_ it,” she responded, turning to fix him with a hard look. Her smaller frame was no less commanding despite their apparent difference in height.

“You _know_ that’s not going to be easy-” he answered her, an edge of concern entering his voice.

“ _I_ know that Commander, I’m just reiterating it to _you_ so that we’re _clear_. We don’t _need_ to take risks any greater than the ones we’re _already_ taking,” Leia retorted, cutting him off with a wave of her hand.

“ _Ma’am_ ,” he said, standing to attention.

“ _Are we clear?_ ” she pressed; her coffee coloured eyes now warmer in their expression.

“ _Crystal,_ ma’am,” Poe responded, standing at ease.

“ _Good._ _Dismissed,_ Commander. Go and ready your squadron,” she smiled, as Poe inclined his head in respect before spinning on his heel and marching towards the door.

“Oh – and _Poe_ – don’t forget I _know_ you…” Leia shouted after him, her eyes narrowed in suspicion, unable to see the smirk which spread on his face as he disappeared out the threshold.

Using the on-board comm system to call a squadron briefing, Poe repeated the briefing back to his pilots and ran over the primary flight plan into the combat zone. Satisfied that they had assimilated the information, he released them to finish preparations in the last few hours before they reached their Launch Zone. Taking a stroll back to the flight deck, Poe found BB-8 chattering away to Jess’s R5 astromech and greeted them both.

“I was _wondering_ where you’d gotten to, Bullseye,” she laughed as she sauntered over to join them, her flight on and the arms of it tied about her waist, crouching down to pat her frantically beeping and whirring droid on the head.

“You all _set?_ ” asked Poe, still standing as he eyed her fussing over her agitated droid.

“ _Yeah,_ we’ll be good, he’s just a bit _cranky_ that we’re not leading the attack this time – that’s all,” she muttered, rising again to cast a brief glance to Poe out of the corner of her sharp eyes.

“ _Yeah…_ I can sympathise,” he mumbled, a slight tone of dejection in his normally chipper voice.

“Come _on_ Commander, we both _know_ that you’re not likely to sit this one _out_. Even if the orders have come from the top!” Jessika laughed warmly, narrowing her eyes at her CO.

“Well, as soon as we’re in a free fire zone, all bets are _off,_ ” Poe fired back, uncrossing his arms.

“’ _Atta boy,_ ” Jess jibed, punching his arm.

“ _Hey now_ \- I can have you _grounded_ for that!” retorted Poe, leaning down at the shorter woman.

“ _Whatever_ you say, sir,” she shot back, darting away and turning to walk in the direction of her X-Wing. “Just know that the beers are going to be on _you_ when we land, Dameron,” she pushed, a tricky twinkle to her walnut-coloured eyes.

“And how’s _that_ exactly, Jess?” he chuckled, marching to catch up with his fellow fighter pilot.

“Because I’m going to _wipe_ your score _off_ the _map!_ ” she announced, flashing him a determined look.

“ _Is that so?_ ” he asked, eyebrow quirking in question, “We’ll just need to _see_ about that…”

“Sounding _awful_ confident sir,” she giggled, beginning to run through her pre-flight checks.

“Am I not always?” he laughed; his expression playful.

“Only before I end up having to save your ass, _sir,_ ” Jess responded without skipping a beat.

“I wouldn’t have it _any_ other way,” Poe snickered, “-see you in the skies, Pava.”

Waving him off, Jess returned to running through her routine whilst Bullseye continued to grumble in a series of _loud_ electronic outbursts, which Poe could hear her cackling at as he crossed the short distance to his own fighter. BB had trundled back across and was waiting patiently, an expectant look in the little droid’s optic.

“You _okay,_ buddy?” he asked, catching it staring at him as he began to step into his flight suit.

A quiet series of beeps came in response, which Poe understood to be _‘I don’t like this…’_

“Hey, _hey,_ it’ll be _fine,_ ” he soothed, crouching down level with the BB unit, his eyes fixing its optic with a look he hoped would reassure it, “We’ve flown _hundreds_ of missions together,” he grinned at the little astromech, “this is just _one_ more to add to that total.” A low whistle in response let Poe know that BB was still with him. The two set about their pre-flight checks, working through it in relative silence. Hopping into his cockpit once they were down to the final few, Poe pulled on his helmet, powered on the comms and started to check in with the rest of his squadron. Once he’d finished mentally checking them off, he contacted the flight controller updating them on their readiness. Minutes now from coming out of hyperdrive, Poe closed the cockpit and began to cycle the engines - running through the last few items - BB-8 whirring in response when he asked him to check them.

Taking a breath, Poe turned his head to see Jess raise her hand in acknowledgement. He could feel the familiar sensation settling in - the _anticipation_. The sudden lurch in his stomach, alerted him to the fact that they’d just dropped out of hyperdrive. Powering up the engines fully, Poe contacted the flight controller again, confirming that they were cleared for launch.

“Alright, Blue Squadron, this is _it_ – we’re up,” he grinned, bringing his ship to a hover as he watched his wingmen slowly pivot their ships to face the hangar entrance and split into two columns. In seconds, they’d breached the hangar shielding and were out into open space. Turning his head, Poe could see the cruiser - Red Squadron and their fleet, with the rest of their detail, flying out to join them. Moments later, the 3 rd Fleet flashed into existence, their squadrons also heading to rendezvous with them.

Forming steady formation lines as they amassed, there was no sign yet of the 5th Fleet.

Leia’s voice came over the comm, whilst the X-Wings and Bombers continued their holding pattern, “Hit them _hard._ Hit them _fast._ _Get everyone home that you can,_ ” she ordered, “-and _happy hunting_.”

_That was it._

Poe’s Squadron now in position - they shot past the bombers and Y-Wings - with Red Squadron and the 5th Fleet X-Wings forming a rear guard. The growing bright glint on the horizon being their target, Poe’s breath held in until he saw the first blasts of laser fire screaming towards them. “ _X-Foils open!_ ” he yelled over the comms. His X-Wings weaving and dodging the blasts as best they could, it wasn’t long before the Resistance lost their first ship - the violent hiss of static over the comm alerting Poe the moment it happened. _Thankfully_ \- it wasn’t one of Poe’s wing - but it didn’t make it any less _hard_.

The bombers were slower and more heavily armoured, so Blue Squadron had their work cut out trying to draw fire from them until the bombing run could commence.

“ _1 minute out!_ ” shouted Jess, keeping track of the distance.

“ _Where_ are the enemy fighters?” barked one of Red squadron in response, over the comms chatter.

“ _He’s right._ There’s no sign of _anything_ other than turrets yet,” grimaced Poe to Jess, checking his scanners again, “ _BB,_ see if you can get a better reading - I’m picking up some interference on the long range…” An affirmative whistle came in answer. “ _Alright._ Blue squadron - widen your scans and stick close to the bombers. I’ve got a _bad_ feeling about this…” muttered Poe, as he waited for an update from his trusty little engineer and co-pilot.

“ _30 seconds…_ ” cut in Jessika.

A bright green flash streaked past the nose of Poe’s X-Wing, causing him to curse loudly.

 _‘That was too close!’_ came a flanging squeal from BB-8.

“Bombers, begin your first run,” ordered Admiral Amilyn Holdo, her voice hard-edged and clipped.

“You heard the lady!” howled Poe, roaring his engines and pulling away to begin taking out turrets.

“ _Confirmed,_ ” came the acknowledgement from C’ai Threnalli, an Abednedo male and one of Poe’s other pilots. 

At that, Blue Squadron tore off across the surface of the huge refuelling station in pairs, heading straight for the turrets in a winding and zigzagging pattern to limit any fire directed at the bombers – Red squadron moving in to take their previous position.

 _“Weapons free!”_ cried Poe, dropping down from above in a strafing sweep on a missile launcher, hollering when it exploded in a green blaze.

“ _Nice shot, sir!_ ” cheered Jess, before shooting past him to the next one.

The bombers now in position, they began bombarding the station, a lucky strike from one of the heavy ordnance blowing out a section of it in a white flash.

 _Still no sign of First Order fighters…,_ noted the young Wing Commander as he and Jess swung back around after taking out another tower - eyes scanning the stars for _any_ sign of enemy craft.

Another four ships and a bomber now down, in the now-frantic hail of fire coming from the defence turrets, Leia watched on with a grave expression on her face. A feeling in the back of her head prickling with apprehension. _With Familiarity._

From _nowhere,_ a Resurgent-class star destroyer jumped into the fray. And another. _And another._ Five in all – now surrounding the station, between it and the Resistance cruisers. Dozens of TIE fighters now screamed into the battle, swarming on the bombers.

“Holy _kriff!_ ” hollered Poe over the comm, as he broke off from Jess, one of the defending fighters tearing its way right between them – forcing them both up into a steep climb away from each other to avoid it.                   

                                                                                           

* * *

                                                        

Rey - still feeling _shame_ heavy in her stomach - _dragged_ herself to her morning training.

Noting that she avoided his gaze and kept her answers vague when he tried to engage with her, after her arrival at the training grounds, Luke decided to continue _observing_ her for the time being.

The unease of her Force signature crackled through the air to him - like deafening white noise.

 _It isn’t like her to try to shut me out…_ he decided in his introspection, before settling on trying a different approach, to see if that would bring her out of herself a bit, “I thought we could start with a good old-fashioned _spar_ today, kid – _what do you think?_ ” he smiled, trying to coax her. When she mumbled a barely audible response, Luke wondered if the the best way to try and get her to open up, would be to _show_ her he had _listened_ to her. Quickly shucking off his cloak, he snatched his saber up from its clip and ignited it, dropping into the opening stance of Form V - _Djem So._

Rey’s head tilted up from her apparent fascination with the ground to look at him, eyes widening when they registered, he was waiting for her. Pushing her internal turmoil to one side – Rey was rather good at compartmentalising when she had to - a necessary tactic when growing up as a scavenger. She followed suit, pulling her saber to her with the Force and twirling its hilt in her slender fingers as it blazed into life. She watched him quietly, trying to gauge whether he would make the first move. So far, she had only sparred with him using staffs, she had yet to _see_ what her Master could really do with a saber. Of course, she’d heard stories of the great Luke Skywalker - defender of the Galaxy. _The man who overthrew an Empire._

Looking at the aged man who slowly circled her now, she would never have guessed they were the _same_ person - not unless you were _close enough_ to see the _eyes_. Where once she had seen only despair, now she could see a blue flame burning with determination. Rey smirked a bit at that, but it soon faded when Luke launched himself bodily at her, thrusting his blade in a swift slashing movement and sent her into a dodging roll. Using her forward momentum to tuck into a handspring away from his attack, Rey landed - her blade readied.

 _So, it’s like that then, is it?_ she thought, her annoyance flaring - _uncontrolled_ \- to him for a moment in the Force, as she eyed him warily. Instinct causing her hard duel with Ben to flash in her mind, she flipped the blade quickly in her hand, holding its hilt now in a reversed grip. As Luke spun round to face her once more, his eyebrow arched when he took her unorthodox stance in. She looked like a Nexu – ferocious, cat-like and ready to pounce.

 _I’ve certainly never shown her that,_ he noted, as he took her in.

Luke paced backwards slowly, seeing a stretch in her leg muscles before she sprang forwards, slicing swiftly backwards and forwards - forcing him to dodge and block at a blistering pace.

 _Heavens,_ he thought, _what she lacks in physical strength, she certainly makes up for in speed…_

Gritting his teeth as she continued to rain blows down on him, Luke’s eyes flew to her hands as she switched handing again, hammering him even harder now.

 _Definitely new,_ he observed, _it’s almost like Ben’s styl- wait..._

Realisation setting in, Luke channelled as much of the Force as he could - into his feet to flip upwards and over her - safely landing a short distance away. His eyes widened as he watched her spin in place a heartbeat later, dropping into a backwards roll to avoid the downward arc of his blade.

 _She’s anticipating me,_ he noticed as she darted behind him. Throwing himself sideways, to avoid the forward jab of her blade, Luke threw her a quick glance over his shoulder. _She’s been practicing clearly,_ he saw, as she swung her legs round in an arcing kick. Free hand snapping out to catch her leg as it connected with his ribs - he gripped onto it tightly - killing his blade and dropped into a controlled fall, carrying them both with the momentum of her kick. Using its speed, he threw Rey roughly to the side, forcing her to fling out her arms to stop herself sliding along the ground.

Running towards her, Luke jumped, using the velocity to carry his reignited blade towards her in a wide, heavy horizontal slash aimed at her middle. Rey sprang to her feet and blocked him, boots scraping across the ground as she dug her heels in - her arms burning with the effort of trying to keep his blade at bay. Teeth grinding - her mind rapidly ran through her options, deciding then and there to mimic her tactic with her _other_ sparring partner, she shut her blade off and arched herself sharply backwards. Luke’s blade swung _harmlessly_ above her.

A look of complete surprise passed over his features, before she used her arms to jump herself back up and boot him squarely in the chest, sending him flying backwards. Winded, he rolled awkwardly into his landing. Luke caught the arrogant smirk on her features as she rose again. _Not bad, kid,_ he thought, as he heaved in breaths, _but I’ve still got a few tricks of my own._ Instantly breaking down the additions to her repertoire, Luke was both _intrigued_ and _disturbed._ This was far deeper and stranger than even he had envisaged.

Both his favourite student’s and his beloved nephew’s styles were in there, but how had _Rey_ come to know them? All signs seemed to point to some sort of communication taking place - either _through_ the Force - or _with it_ directly. But other than what Luke had been able to gather from the ancient tomes and treatises which littered his study, he still wasn’t entirely sure. He was _closer_ than he had been before and at least now he would be able to start filling Rey in with what he had learned.

When she darted towards him once more and he spotted her switching grip again, Luke met her blade with his own, using her weaker reversed grip against her to knock her blade to the side easily. Every time she tried to strike at him with it now, he struck it away powerfully - loosening her grip. Catching the flicker of panic on her face, he recognised that she now realised that she’d been overconfident.

Using the opening, he swung his heaviest blow yet and succeeded in knocking her blade free from her hand – using the Force to throw it far to the side. Her eyes watched it hurtle off and she could _feel_ the heat from his blade above her shoulder, _perfectly parallel_ with it.

“It’s _over_ Rey, you’re disarmed!” he announced with as firm a tone as he could muster - voice wavering as he tried to bring his breathing back to a normal rate. Sensing a tinge of disappointment from her, Luke was pleased he’d succeeded in getting her out of her head. “ _Excellent_ work though, Rey,” he continued - offering praise where praise was due – although, deciding to even it out, “you _almost_ had me that time!” he winked at her, letting out his amused crack of laughter when she glowered at him in response.

“ _Thank-you,_ Master,” she mumbled, bowing slightly in acknowledgement.

“I can see you’ve been _practising_ since our last sparring match,” he began, “and that you’ve _picked up_ a few things… Things _I_ haven’t taught you…”

Rey’s eyes flew to his when the words registered. _Alarmed._

“I think it’s time I shared with you what I’ve learned. _Come,_ sit,” he bid her, as he slowly dropped into a cross-legged resting position on the ground. As she sat down opposite him, fearful eyes still on his, he smiled at her to reassure her. “ _Don’t worry,_ Rey. You’re not in any trouble. You’ve just made me realise that the _only_ way I can help you, is if we _communicate_ with each other,” Luke announced.

A small sense of relief washing through her, Rey still watched him cautiously.

“There isn’t _much_ on this – _phenomenon_ – you’re experiencing. Not in the _main_ Jedi canon, anyway. However, I was able to find a fairly detailed treatise by Master Qui-Gon Jinn and references within, to some other ancient texts,” Luke began, eyes searching hers, for any sign of reaction.

Rey gulped heavily with unease.

“This does indeed _appear_ to be a _bond_ between two _souls,_ ” he continued, gaze never leaving hers, “-a connection _so_ deep that _one_ can sense the _other_ – _across the stars._ They say that this _transcends_ merely sensing a presence or occurrence - to _feeling_ what the _other_ is feeling. _Hearing each other. Seeing each other._ As if _time_ and _space_ are merely _secondary._ ”

Rey couldn’t quite believe what she was hearing.

 _So, this is all real then? It isn’t some recurring nightmare? I’m not going demented?_ she mused. She felt as if she were - her Master had just _confirmed_ that her and Kylo Ren _really were_ communicating with each other. Then she realised that this meant that _Ben_ was _really_ communicating with her.

“We’ll need to work some more on helping you to build up a resilience to be able to _dampen_ this connection,” Luke said, his voice suddenly grave, “-in case there’s any attempt to use this _bond_ to track you down or attack you.” Rey didn’t miss the concern flash across his features when he sensed the panicked jolt she released at that- she was thankful though, that he didn’t press on it for the time being.

“It _will_ take _time_ , Rey, but I will help you become _strong enough_ to _resist_ any such attempts - _especially_ future ones,” he spoke, his cerulean eyes seeming to bore into hers, “I fear that if left _unchecked_ , they would only grow _worse…_ ”

Rey’s heart began to thunder in her ears.

 _He knows,_ she worried.

Her Master’s eyes, however, were nothing but kind. If Luke _did_ know, he never raised it. “ _Darkness_ is _drawn_ to _Light,_ Rey,” he merely said, “-there can’t be one _without_ the other. I know that now…”

As the words left his mouth, they were both hit by a crushing wave of disturbance in the Force. Rey’s eyes snapped to Luke’s, her mind to Poe and Luke’s to Leia.

_Battle._

Somewhere out there, both were caught in a battle for their lives.                                                                                                                                                                 

                                                                                             

* * *

 

 

 _The Finalizer_ slammed out of hyperdrive, straight into the middle of the fracas above the Jakku refuelling station.

“ _Get_ us _between_ them and the station! _Now!_ ” commanded Hux, as he marched down the walkway of the bridge. “Our fighters need to be out there - _yesterday!_ ” he barked, red hair seemingly ablaze with anger as he rounded on the flight controller. Settling momentarily, he saw the rest of their fleet arrive and their TIE fighters begin engaging the Resistance craft, he heard quiet feet coming to rest beside him. Without needing to turn his head, he _knew_ it was Phasma.

“Would _somebody_ please _start firing?_ ” he roared at the bridge crew, gesturing wildly at the fighting outside, before he turned to address the stormtrooper captain.

“Ren’s _launched,_ sir,” she offered, a slight tone of irritation to her modulated voice.

“Let him put himself to _use,_ ” the vexed General muttered exasperatedly, “-if there’s _any_ luck he’ll be _hit…_ ”

Phasma’s head jerked around at that, unable to quite _believe_ the mutinous words which had left her commanding officer.

“ _Calm down,_ Phasma,” he laughed darkly, “-we both _know_ I’d never be _that_ lucky…” Hux continued to stifle his laughter when he caught sight of her shaking her head in dismay.

“You _do know_ that the enemy is out _there,_ sir?” she asked hushedly, nodding towards the viewport, eliciting a small, fleeting smirk from Hux. He did enjoy prodding her sense of propriety when it came to the chain of command and was glad that after the – _incident_ – on Dantooine, they were making some small progress towards friendship again. It had taken no small _effort_ on his part, however, promising to fully investigate Kabira Ren’s involvement in what had been her and Kylo Ren’s mission – as well as ensuring her injured troopers were sent immediately to the Supreme Leader’s facility on Ilum. He knew he _still_ had a long way to go and hoped that she was not still suspecting _his_ involvement in Kabira’s arrival.

“I _hadn’t_ realised, Captain,” he quipped dryly - his eyes now fixed on the chaos of the battle once more, although with a small smile playing on his lips. He always _knew_ he’d get a reaction from her.

“Just in case it had _slipped_ your attention, sir,” she responded, inclining her head towards him. The two moved then to review the tactical data coming in from the ship’s scans.

Outside, Kylo’s _Silencer_ tore towards the battle flanked by two standard TIE fighters in his Wolf Pack formation - searching for a _worthy_ opponent. Diving down to give chase to an X-Wing, they herded it away and Kylo took it down with a single shot. He had inherited a true _gift_ for flying – whether he chose to acknowledge it or not. He was snapped from his thoughts when a black X-Wing buzzed him, nearly taking his wing off. Growling angrily - he pulled heavily on the controls - giving chase. _“On me!”_ he commanded his wingmen.

The X-Wing pilot would not be an easy mark however, barrel-rolling and rapidly changing direction - as if taunting him. Irritation flaring his temper, it was ignited further when Kylo thought he could sense Rey – feeling _concern_ from her for whoever he was now giving chase to. When the X-Wing flipped suddenly, Kylo cursed violently, as it swept past the cockpit close enough for him to catch a glimpse of the pilot. Sensing the defiance from them, it dawned on him a few moments later.

 _The one I captured on Jakku. Rey cares for him?_ Kylo reflected and then, enraged by jealousy, he threw the ship around - rocketing after the Resistance fighter - firing wildly. Coming back around, they were headed into the swarming dogfighting, when something tingled within his mind.

_Something Familiar._

His head whipped around to the sight of the Resistance cruisers now taking a battering from the Star Destroyer cannons – their shields rippling vividly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wooo - over 1000 hits :) 
> 
> Thank-you all my readers, please let me know if you've been enjoying the story - I love hearing from you! Also - how HYPED are we all for Episode IX? 
> 
> I've used the following tracks whilst writing this chapter: -  
> 'The Mission Begins' - Michael Kamen - the briefing, Poe and Jess before the mission; down to "That was it".
> 
> 'Scherzo for X-Wings' - John Williams - The Resistance begin their assault on the refuelling station.
> 
> 'You Fall, You Die' & 'Scorpiox' - Ramin Djawadi - Rey and Luke's training session.
> 
> 'The Last Iron Lord' - Michael Salvatori - Luke fills Rey in with what he has learned about the bond.
> 
> 'Last Stand' - Michael Salvatori - The Finalizer enters the fray. Kylo battles Poe.


	19. Skirmish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The battle above the fuelling station continues. 
> 
> Kylo and Poe's dogfight heats up. 
> 
> The tide begins to turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, I'm hoping there are feels a plenty for you all with this chapter, especially the ending *hides behind hands* Sorry this has been a bit delayed, but I'm hoping it's been worth it and I think – don't quote me on this – but this should be our longest chapter yet. Hopefully you all enjoy it!

Luke had instinctively sought out his twin, through the Force, the moment he had sensed a disturbance from her. An unease swirled within it. 

                                                                                               

* * *

 

Leia braced herself against one of the battlefield display monitors, which were highlighting the positions of the enemy fighters and the positions of all Resistance assets. Her stomach lurched with each burst of static or dreadful scream over the comm, signifying the end of another one of her compatriots.

“ _Shields at 80%._ Request to engage the Destroyers, General,” came the familiar, but frustrated voice of Vice Admiral Amilyn Holdo. Another violent tremor rocked _The Raddus_ as it took a direct hit, whilst Leia surveyed the display before her, teeth gritted, and a number of stray silver hairs having been knocked out of her ornate braded updo.

“ _Hold,_ until my signal,” she commanded, not missing the delay until the Vice Admiral replied ‘acknowledged’. They were biding time.  _But at what cost?_  Leia wondered wryly. “ _Where_ are the 5th fleet and _where_ in hell did those destroyers come from?” growled the diminutive General, as the whole ship shook again under the heavy barrage it was withstanding.  

“No response from the 5th to my hails,” cried Lieutenant Connix who whipped her head round in response, concern etched onto her youthful features as her headset was knocked off by a further jerk as the ship took evasive action, “-I can’t reach them on any frequency and long-range sensors aren’t picking them up…” 

“ _75%,_ General,” yelled Amilyn as another explosion wracked the comm.  _We’re vulnerable as long as we sit here,_ thought Leia, her gaze turning now to the battle outside, as bright-white flashes from another ignited section of the station punctuated the scene. Folding her arms behind herself as she stood in front of the viewport, she felt a tingling in the back of her head - prickling with apprehension.  _Familiarity._  Leia felt Luke in that moment, searching for her in the bond they shared as siblings. Two halves of a greater whole. She reached out for him, releasing enough through the Force to let him know that she was  _fine_. Then an entirely different sensation hit her. One she had not felt since it had abruptly shut itself off from her, so many years ago.  _Severed._  

It was _so_ like _him_ , she thought - half of her and half of her husband. Ben had been  _perfect_. Everything they had hoped that he would be - her sharp mind, their shared wicked sense of humour and his father’s gift for flying. And then it had been tainted. He had not been able to escape her Father’s  _legacy_. A legacy that had led to his fall to Darkness. That had led to her brother’s exile and her husband’s-  _No,_  she chastised herself, when she caught herself no longer focusing on the task at hand,  _I can’t. My people need me - there’s time for that later..._

“Hull compromised, General!” yelled one of the bridge crew – a frantic edge to their voice while their fingers flew over their console, desperately trying to assess the extent of the damage. 

“ _Can you contain it?_ ” Leia rasped, her eyes flickering over to them, as they fidgeted with their headset. A nervous nod from them in response told her that they could, but that they weren’t sure how long it would hold for. 

“ _60%,_ General. Requesting permission again to engage,” demanded Holdo, a more insistent air to her voice. She _knew_ they were on borrowed time and was clearly itching to even the odds. 

Taking a breath to collect herself before she replied, Leia’s mind picked across the tactical data streaming to the display in the centre of the bridge and orbited it slowly as she reached her decision. “ _Granted,_ Vice-Admiral. Let’s level the playing field,” she announced, with a small smile playing on her features, eyes narrowed in focus. Turning for a moment to Lt. Connix, Leia asked her to bring up a fleet-wide comm band and was met with a swift nod from the young officer. As she efficiently keyed up the channel, Leia quickly began to run over the message she wished to convey, before addressing the amassed Resistance members. 

“This is General Organa,” she began, without having quite finished her run-through. Her eyes were immediately drawn to the vibrant rippling of their shields under the increasing barrage from the Finalizer and its accompanying ships.  “We owe it to those we lost on Dantooine to make this raid  _mean_ something,” her voice wavered, but her resolve did not fail, “To those we have lost. To those we _still_ fight for.” An aurora-like distortion on the shields appeared again, before they began to flicker dangerously. “All ships not currently engaged in the bombing run are given clearance to engage the enemy. _Make it count,_ ” she signed off, dropping her head as she did. Leia _knew_ what she was asking of them. It did not mean she had to _like_  it.  The First Order had been _far_ better supplied and – dare she admit it – equipped. But they didn’t have the pilots that the Resistance had - discipline they had in _abundance_ , but not the daring and courage that her own wings had. 

White and purple flashes dragged Leia’s eyes to the viewport once more, and she could see that Amilyn was leading a charge of returning fire, rallying the Resistance capital ships. Turning her head to the side, Leia nodded over to Major Brance, signalling for their ship to be brought about and also begin returning fire. Moving back once more to the holo-table, she watched intently as the new data streamed in. They were holding ground; the Star Destroyers’ advance had been halted and _their_ shields were now starting to drain down. 

Her small moment of peace was disrupted by an anxious report from Connix, “ _Massive_ energy readings from the Finalizer, General. I think they’re readying their Ion Cannons…” 

“Get me Poe.  _Now,_ lieutenant,” responded Leia instantly, no hesitation in her voice.

“ _Aye ma’am,_ ” the young officer answered, simultaneously pinging his ship with a hail. 

“Dameron?” Leia waited, there had been no update from Poe over the course of the battle, but that wasn’t of concern for her – she knew he would be neck-deep in a dogfight. _Or several._  

“General? I’m a _little_ busy right now…” came the sound of the young Wing Commander’s voice a few moments later, punctuated by a heavy burst of static at the end of his message.

“Commander, the lead enemy ship is powering up their Ion Cannons. If we can’t get them knocked out our bombers will be  _fried_ , and our carriers and cruisers will be exposed,” the wizened General informed him, her face as serious as if he were standing before her. 

“ _Understood_ , ma’am,” answered Poe, a beat later, voice even despite the frenzied movements his ship was making on the bridge’s tactical display. 

“We’ll try to keep their fire focused on us in the meantime. Just concentrate on doing your job and then get back to the bombers,” she continued, a knowing tone to her voice. When no further response came from their best pilot, she merely shook her head and stared at the small strike wing detaching itself from the main fracas, now blinking on her map.  Her eyes were fixed firmly on the three red hexagons blinking close behind.  _Ben…_  She perceived, a small pins-and-needles sensation prickling at her nerves.  

                                                                                             

* * *

 

 

Rey sensed the furious spike from Kylo like a hammer blow to her head. Something had angered him.  _Greatly._ Then she sensed the killing intent that quickly followed it, cold and hard like steel. Her brow creased deeply when she thought she could hear him, in the recesses of her mind.  

_Really - she cares for the pilot? I thought she’d have more taste…_ he seemed to sneer, _too bad he won’t be around for much longer…_  Rey reeled at this. Luke had been right, Kylo was now able to intrude into her thoughts more visibly - although it seemed to be worse when she was distracted. As soon as she had sensed the disturbance and begun to think of Poe, she realised she must have unconsciously signalled her presence and Ren had jumped on the chance to agitate her. Now he was targeting Poe, much like he had targeted Finn. _Any_ sign of weakness she had; he would exploit - she had learned that much at least. It _infuriated_ her. 

“ _Rey,_  I felt it too,” Luke announced, reaching for her hand and squeezing it gently. She blinked at her Master then, realising she’d been off in a world of her own. “ _Now,_  why don’t we continue your training in the meantime? It won’t do either of us any good to be focusing on that – there’s not much we can do from _here_ anyway,” smiled Luke as he moved once more to stand, bracing his knee with his hand.

“Are you sure we should be continuing, Master?” she laughed, springing to her feet then to help him up, her eyes flashing with mischief, “It looks like standing up took what _little_ energy you had left…” 

Exhaling in mock-defeat, Luke’s head swung around, meeting her gaze with a look that conveyed his lack of amusement. “I’m made of some _pretty_ stern stuff, Rey,” he snorted, sarcasm dripping from his tone, “you’re not the _only_ one who grew up on a backwater desert world, you know...” 

“You mean-,” she stammered, suddenly on the back foot. This was _new_ knowledge.

“ _Easy,_ Rey,” he chuckled, “we’re more similar than you think,” slapping her gently on the back as he moved away. “ _Now,_ take a few moments and then we’ll begin again, I want to help you start shutting everything you _don’t_ need out, during your saber work,” Luke smiled, before taking a swig from the canteen clipped at his hip. 

“Is it really going to help?” Rey asked, curiosity bleeding into her voice, as she too took the opportunity to rehydrate.

“More than you’d think, kid,” he smirked back, raising his artificial hand and comically waving the fingers at her. “If _I’d_ been able to focus on what my lightsaber was doing and had been further along in my own training to counter everything my opponent threw me, I might not have lost my hand. _Sometimes,_ hindsight really is the best teacher.”  

“What happened?” Rey puzzled, now _definitely_ intrigued, her eyes wide with surprise. Luke had never really offered her much about himself before and now he was freely telling her stories from his past. It was refreshing.

“I had rushed off to help my friends -  _despite_ my Master’s warnings. It was a trap - set by Darth Vader - to lure me out and I was _no_ match for him. He toyed with me until he had me cornered, severed my sword-hand and tried to tempt me to the Dark Side,” Luke responded, a faraway look entering his aged features, his ocean-blue eyes seeming to mist over. 

“ _And did it work?_ ” Rey wondered, a hint of apprehension - at her own situation - creeping into her voice, as she stretched her limbs out again before their next training session. 

“Ha! Does it _look_ like it did, kid? He took my hand to try to make me give in to the temptation - to use my own _anger_ against me. The Empire had murdered my family. He’d killed my Master and then he’d captured Leia, Han and the others before I could rescue them.” Luke answered, holding her gaze, “By removing my hand, he hoped I would explode with rage with the anger that was already within me, that it would force my descent into Darkness… I learned that lesson the _hard_ way. I’m hoping that if I can give _you_ the training you _need_ before you meet such an opponent, you won’t need to.” 

Rey gulped a bit at that. She hadn’t _quite_ been prepared for his honesty. 

“ _Wampa got your tongue?_ ” he laughed in response – at the dumbfounded look which flashed across her face. 

“I’m just not used to hearing much about –  _before_  – from you,” Rey managed to blurt out, after several failed attempts.

“Well, I can’t help you if I’m not honest with you, Rey,” Luke grinned briefly, before beckoning her to stand beside him, “-that goes  _both_  ways.” Rey returned his small smile and crossed over to where he stood. 

“ _Now,_ let’s start by going over these _pulses_  you release without realising,” he said, his voice now soft, as he eyed her. 

“I don’t know how to make them stop,” she muttered, an annoyed edge to her timbre, shaking her head slightly, “I’ve tried everything you’ve shown me previously, but it doesn’t help…”

“It takes  _practice,_ Rey. _A lot of it._ The problem is, that you’re so naturally strong already in your connection to the Force, that it makes it _harder,_ ” Luke began, not missing the shadow of disappointment lurking within her eyes, “-most Force Users have to build up to your level over a  _very_ long time.”

“I understand, Master…” she breathed, a tinge of dejection to her voice and her eyes to the ground between them. 

Placing a hand gently on her shoulder, Luke waited until her eyes rose again to meet his, “I said _harder,_ Rey, not insurmountable. You’re talking to a  _Skywalker_  here. It wasn’t exactly straightforward for me either,” he replied.  

Relieved a little that she wasn’t alone in this, a small half-smile tugged at the corner of her mouth with the way Luke was looking at her, almost paternally.  _So, the hard-old nut was a soft one at heart, really,_  she noted. 

“Come on, kid, let’s get back to work,” he gestured, indicating for her to mirror the stance he had dropped into. 

“ _Age_ before _beauty,_ Master. _After you,_ ” she sniggered, following suit a moment later. They worked together like that in silence for a while, broken only by Luke correcting her stance occasionally or announcing that he knew she was getting distracted again. When he began to show her how to let go of everything else - other than herself, her opponent and their environment - Rey began to feel a peace entering her. A calm that pushed away all else to the back of her mind – an awareness still there, but which had diminished the boiling hatred she had been sensing from Kylo. Then it had receded _entirely._  Silent for a few moments and replaced with a sinking, abyssal dread that caused her to lose focus again. Luke’s eyes flew over to hers, the colour draining from his face.  _Had he felt it too?_  She pondered, her eyes wide with horror. 

                                                                                           

* * *

 

 

Kylo knew the moment he had felt it, that his mother was here. Uncertainty gripped at him tightly, even as he gave chase to his quarry, who was proving to be increasingly difficult to keep inside of his targeting.  

“Cut him off if you have to,” he barked to his escort, “but _I_  will be the one to take him down!” Hanging back for a moment, he watched as his two wingmen tore off in pursuit, trying to shepherd the enemy fighter back out into the open. A rainbow-like flickering drew his eyes to his left, before the bright streaks split the starfield in half. The Resistance were returning fire. He was torn from his spectating by Hux’s officious voice over the comm, “ _Ren,_  get back on board or get on that X-Wing and his friends! They’re making a _straight run_  for our Ion Cannons!” 

“ _Acknowledged,_ ” was all Kylo managed to grind out before he slammed his controls forward, accelerating the Silencer rapidly. Brutally taking out a Y-Wing as it crossed his flight path, he spotted the TIEs now on his display.  _Good, they seem to still be on him,_  he noted. Gaining on them, he could now make out the glint of the metal craft in the distance. They grew from mere specks of light, until he could see the distinctive hexagonal solar collectors of the TIEs, zig-zagging back and forth in their hunt. Bearing down upon them, he cut across Poe’s X-Wing, forcing it into a steep evasive dive.  

_“Sithspit!”_ yelled the young Resistance Commander as he pushed his ship for _everything_ it would give. Spiralling to dodge the laser fire being rained down at him from the three marauders, he spotted a gap in the pattern of flashes sweeping past his cockpit and raced through it. 

Releasing an angry growl, Kylo pulled out of his dive as his two wingmen flew past him, correcting his course so he could catch up to the sleek black X-Wing. Despite the Resistance fighter being a challenge to keep up with, Kylo  _knew_  that his ship could outperform the vessel he was growing ever more determined to shoot down. Sensing his attack wing reforming to either flank, Kylo couldn’t help but smirk, he _had_ him now. _It was only a matter of time._  Sensing a concerned pulse from Rey, Kylo felt his irritation swell.  _Stars,_ he thought to himself,  _can she not see that it is the First Order alone who are trying to bring order to the Galaxy? The Resistance are agitators - nothing more -_ _clinging desperately onto the old ways as the Empire had been-_

A flurry of laser fire drew him out of his introspection – forcing out of his pursuit as the new opponent nearly rammed straight into him, bearing down on them from a blind spot caused by the glare from the nearby star. It flew in a furious corkscrew, blazing shots as it came. Another X-Wing had joined their skirmish - white with blue chevron accents. He could sense the sheer will to protect flowing from it through the Force, in crashing waves.  

“Took your  _sweet_  time, Jess,” laughed Poe, a cresting mirth assaulting Kylo’s senses as the new challenger swung back around. The two X-Wings crossed flightpaths so close that even Kylo’s eyes opened further - in the mistaken belief that they would collide – his jaw almost agape when they passed a mere hairs breadth apart.  

“Thought it might diminish the  _effect,_ sir,” she quipped back, rolling downwards and away as Poe mirrored her move upwards. 

_Damn them!_  thought Kylo, his attention now divided from his quarry. Mind rushing, he ordered his escort to give chase to the new attacker, “ _Take the new one!_ The other’s  _mine!_ ” he snarled, before breaking off and after Poe. 

_Whoever this is, they aren’t giving up easy,_  noted Poe, sweat beginning to form on his brow as he whipped his head back around to check if his opponent was still on his tail. Spotting the dark, Mynock-like silhouette behind him, he thrust even harder forward on his controls. “ _Buddy,_ any extra you could coax out the engines right now would be _much_ appreciated…” he shouted, hoping his frantically working astromech had heard him.

A series of small grumbling whirrs noted that it was: _‘doing its best, but that it wasn’t a miracle worker. Especially when no new parts had been installed – despite several requests for the same…’_  

Poe had to release a nervous laugh at that. His small friend was right - he knew that - but the Resistance weren’t exactly _flush_ with credits. “You know, buddy, you do such a great job of stretching what we have out – I figured if it ain’t broke, _why fix it?_ ” 

An annoyed squeal let him know that  _‘this is as good as it was getting’_.

“ _Alright then,_  buckle up - I’ve got to try and shake this guy,” he began, “ _Jess_ – I need you to give me another fly by, see if you can’t _rattle_ this guy’s cage a bit and give me some room to work my magic.” An explosion over the comm caused Poe’s eyes to flicker down to his scanner with worry, but he quickly established that Jess had managed to take down one of the enemy TIEs.

“ _Scratch one,_  Sir,” his wingwoman exclaimed, before pulling up into a vertical climb to go after the other. 

“Alright, Pava. Take that one out and then come and ‘save my ass’,” he laughed, quoting her earlier words back at her. 

“Think you can hold on that long  _without_ me, Sir?” she fired back. 

“I think I can manage just fine, Jess,” he snorted, “-but I’d rather not have to draw this out too long…” his voice trailing off as he eyed the enemy cannons again, almost completing their initialisation. 

“ _Aye,_ sir,” she muttered, before her comm went dead and Poe was on his own once more. A bright flash registered on his periphery. 

Kylo shrugged off the loss of his second wingman as if it were rainwater, he was that engrossed in downing the Resistance pilot that had given him such trouble from before - that was _still_ proving to be a _nuisance._ A deeper part of him smouldered with rage that the scavenger clearly held some form of _affection_ for him - he was _nothing_ \- just another being disconnected from the Force. He wasn’t  _special,_ as Kylo and Rey were. Yet, he flew as if he could anticipate almost every move that Kylo made, which only stoked the flames licking Kylo’s temper even more. 

When the black X-Wing swung back into his cross-hairs for a few moments, Kylo’s thumbs snapped instinctively over the triggers on his controls. An overwhelming rush of worry from Rey forced him to hesitate and he lost his target-lock. Cursing viciously, he tried to level out and take aim again, his weapons powered up and primed. A frantic beeping on his battlefield scans confirmed to him an incoming enemy, just as he sensed it a few seconds earlier. The other X-Wing was back and hurtling down on his position with a vengeance. Spotting torpedoes inbound, Kylo had to rapidly spin away to avoid the first, releasing countermeasures whilst simultaneously dampening his own engines to try to force them towards his decoy and off his ship.  Releasing an amused smirk when he had managed to shake them both off, he realised the ruse too late when he spotted the enemy ships again. 

The white X-Wing was rushing him from behind, torpedoes armed, whilst that _damned_ pilot that Rey cared for was rushing him head on.  _The fool_ , Kylo hissed internally,  _he should know when he’s outmatched. There’s no way he can expect to take me out with that heap of junk,_ he sneered, as he matched his opponent’s speed in a desire to see who would blink first. A shiver of concern again from the girl - this time directed towards  _himself_ , distracted Kylo for a moment too long.  _Rey? What are you-?_  he thought, before shaking his head to clear it. 

Similarly, Poe couldn’t shake the prickling at the back of his neck, as if someone were watching him. It unnerved him at first, but when his mind unexpectedly drifted back to Rey, he felt a warmth spreading within his chest. He hoped she was alright. He wished now, as he stared down the demonic looking TIE fighter, that he had had the guts to tell her how he’d felt. It had only been a few days, but he wished he had told her. Told her that she had made him feel more normal than he had in the months since he had been interrogated. “On my mark Jess –  _don’t_ fire until I signal,” announced Poe, as the two X-Wings sped on an intercept course towards each other, “and definitely  _don’t_ shoot _me_ this time!” 

“It was  _one_  time, Sir,” she laughed, an audible but sassy flanging from her astromech  _‘begging to differ’_. 

“Bullseye seems to disagree…” Poe shot back. 

“ _Fine…_  Two times!” she snickered. 

“Alright, on my mark!” barked Poe, his tone snapping back to the clipped and formal air of an officer.

_“Kriffing hell!”_  roared Kylo, as he fought desperately to shake his pursuer, ever-mindful of the black X-Wing barrelling towards him. 

“ _3,_ ” yelled the young Commander over Jess’s Comm. Her head whirled around to check on her droid companion, still sparking wildly into the night from the glancing hit he had taken earlier. Silently vowing to take him straight to the repair bay, her eyes whipped forwards again. 

“ _2,_ ” shouted Poe, bringing his X-Foils back out of their lock and into attack position. A rivulet of cold sweat trickled down his neck as he continued forward, foreboding emanating from _The Silencer_ as he rocketed towards it - as if it _willed_ him _dead_. An explosion in the distance - off to the left – alerted Kylo to the fact that one of the Resistance cruisers had succumbed to the heavy volley from the First Order flagships, beginning to drift backwards as it slowly lost power. Yet there was no sound accompanying the fierce orange flare leaking out from it into the black. A brief, warm caress -like the ones he had received to his face as a child - came to him through the Force.  Kylo swore wildly, having to dive at a break-neck angle, when a large Resistance cruiser flashed into view before him.  Followed by another and more after that.  Immediately, they brought themselves about to begin a heavy torrent of return fire on the flank of _The Finalizer_ and the remaining Star Destroyers.  

Losing sight of the X-Wing, his head scanned around within his cockpit for any tell-tale glint on his horizon, whilst his scanners readjusted following the new arrivals. He noted as he passed below, that the surface of the Resistance dreadnought –  _The Scarif_  – was pock-marked by evidence of blaster fire and the tell-tale molten glow of damage. Rolling to dodge the turret fire he was drawing, Kylo pulled up and away.  

“1!  _Now,_  Jess!” bellowed Poe over the comm, as she dove once more from the cover offered by the bright-white glare of the system’s star. Slicing cleanly before the nose of the Silencer, Kylo snarled as he fought to retain control in the distortion caused by the X-Wing’s near-miss.  It provided all the opening that the black X-Wing needed when it fired at him point blank - missing the main body of his fighter - but tearing one of the solar collectors clean off. He was thrown into a wild spin, the gravity exuded by the large dreadnought beginning to draw him down now that he had no stabilisation. 

“Yeah! – and  _that’s_ how it’s done!” howled an ecstatic Poe over the comm, “Nice work, Pava - now let’s see if we can take these Ion cannons out now that the 5th fleet have taken some of the heat off us…” 

“I’m with you, Sir,” she smiled to herself, forming up off his left. The two X-Wings drew up on the hulking form of _The Finalizer,_ spiralling up steeply before flipping in tandem into a steep fall, down towards the cannons. 

Poe felt the rush of adrenaline hit him as the first broad green flashes from the anti-spacecraft turrets flew towards them.  _“Follow my lead,”_ he roared to Jessika as the two of them began their attack run.  

“ _Ladies first_ \- as always,” she sniggered, taking out the one on their left as they began to weave at dizzying speed between the turrets, in a raging hail of fire. 

“Why thank you, Jess -  _always so generous,_ ” he laughed, before taking out another tower. He rolled into barrel roll through the cloud of debris as he passed it, to shake off some of the plasma from his shields. 

“I don’t want to _alarm_ you, Sir, but we have a _swarm_ of narked off TIEs heading our way,” she announced, after checking her scans. 

“Nothing we can’t handle,” he laughed, only a hint of doubt in his tone. 

“If you _say_ so, Sir, but I’d rather not get spaced today,” she grumbled, moving out to give Poe greater cover. 

“Come on Jess, have a _little_ faith! I’ll get you home in time for your date…” he guffawed loudly over the comm.  

“ _How did you-?_ ” she hissed at him. 

“I have my sources, Pava,” he smirked round at BB, who merely shook its head in disbelief at its friend for bringing it up at a time like _this._  

His words sinking in a moment later, Jess whirled round on Bullseye, muttering an ‘unbelievable’ at it before focusing again on the task at hand. Scanning the surface of _The Finalizer_  once more and flicking her eyes between it and her scanner, she spotted the tell-tale pale-blue shimmering of Ion Cannons powering up. 

“There they are!” she shouted, alerting her wingman over the comm.

“Use every missile you’ve got, Jess,” he barked in response. 

“ _Understood,_ Sir,” she acknowledged, before re-engaging her X-Foils into attack position.  

“May the Force be with you...” he murmured, before the two friends spilt off from each other to draw some of the enemy strike wing coming in off the other. Dodging and whirling wildly, they looped and flipped around, frantically working to outfly the TIE fighters that tore after them. 

“I’ve got a lock. Bombs are away,” Jess announced briefly, before returning her attention to her pursuers. 

Poe eyed his scanner briefly, eyes darting between it and his targeting display, watching the trajectory of her missiles tracking across it. The seconds drawn out. One blinked out. Then the other.  _Dammit,_ he thought, before releasing a burst from his engines to pull himself into a steep arc, up and over his hexagonal-winged attackers. Without wasting a moment, as soon as Poe was able to rocket forward again, he fell into another steep, spinning dive firing off his missiles at near point-blank range. Clear of the shielding of the larger craft. Blowing a hole into the first cannon, he swiftly skipped across the surface to its counterpart and blew that as well. Using the burst of plasma jetting out of the destroyed structure as cover, he shot off back towards Jess’ last position and gave her an assist, taking out a few stragglers and opening their playing field a bit more, before shooting forward to catch up with her. 

“ _Nice job,_ Sir!” she grinned, as he flew in an inverted parallel above X-Wing. 

“Couldn’t have done it without you, Pava,” he smiled back, before casting a look behind him, “looks like the 5th fleet is clearing up the Destroyers. What say you to sweeping out some of these TIEs?” he asked, jerking his head behind them. 

“ _With pleasure,_ Commander,” she beamed. At the other end of the battlefield, Kylo sat, drifting helplessly now. Passing himself off as wreckage, he could only watch in simmering anger as he saw his fleet beginning to lose their foothold. The new arrivals had seen to that.  _Hux had been too overconfident in their intelligence,_ he observed, unable to even communicate it to him. 

                                                                                               

* * *

 

 

“ _General Organa_  – hope we’re not too late to join the party?” asked the familiar voice of Admiral Statura, as  _The Scarif_  and the rest of the 5th fleet’s heavy firepower flashed into sight behind the First Order’s ships, flanking them. The enemy shields finally rippling before they shimmered out of existence and the ships themselves began to take fire. 

_They won’t like that,_ noted Leia, as she watched the scene from the bridge,  _Good._  “Nice of you to join us, Admiral.  _Better late than never,_ ” she smiled grimly, as  _The Raddus_  rumbled with another intense quake. 

“ _Sorry for the delay,_ ” he responded earnestly, “-we were waylaid by fleetwide faults. Looks like your _fears_ were _confirmed-,”_ his voice cutting out as the lights began to flicker ominously above Leia. The lights blinked on once more before the ship went dark. Leia marched over to Lieutenant Connix. 

“ _Status report,_ Lieutenant,” she demanded, mind running over several potential courses of action, as she awaited the update.

“Our shields are  _failing,_ General,” the young woman stated, her concerned gaze meeting her commanding officer’s briefly before returning to her display, as she began to rattle of the facts, “We have hull breaches in decks 10-16. _Contained,_ but if we go to reserve power, we may need to divert what’s left in the shields to life support for those decks. They’ve taken out two of our engines - one more and we’ll lose stability - It could send us into a roll….” 

“Issue the order to evacuate,” Leia commanded, her eyes and voice unflinching. 

“ _Ma’am?_ ” asked the younger officer, her eyes conveying that she hadn’t quite believed what she’d just heard.

“Do it - _now,_ ” urged Leia. Another deathly shudder rocked the ship, throwing some of the bridge crew from their stations before it began to lean ever more steeply. A loud crack alerted her to the fact that their viewport was damaged.  

“Loss of pressure ma’am – we have _seconds!_ ” yelled Major Brance, as he helped Connix to stand, her arm slung over his shoulder. 

“ _Everyone out_ \- that’s an order!” rasped Leia, as she hauled herself up to her feet again. A terrible crunching and grinding noise behind her drew her eyes to the viewport briefly, before her eyes flickered back to her bridge crew beginning to rush for the doors.  The cracking was fracturing rapidly across it, with an accompanying hissing as air began to leech out of the room. Most - but not all – of the personnel, had made it to the doors. 

“ _General!_ ” screamed Lieutenant Connix - watching in horror as the glass gave way - just as Major Brance grabbed her tightly around the waist and hauled her backwards through the door. The bulkhead slammed home behind them.  

                                                                                             

* * *

 

 

Ben’s eyes flew open as a terrible sensation tore at his heart. 

_Mother!_  

_No!_

                                                                                           

* * *

 

 

A  _strange_ sensation that he recognised instantly, rippled out to Kylo - his eyes blown wide with shock, unblinking. His head snapped around in time to watch the bridge of one of the cruisers blow out in a violent fountain of gas and debris as it buckled. 

He sat for a moment, before feeling the phenomenon again - wavering once, warm with Light - before it disappeared, snuffed out like a candle.  An anguished scream ripped its way out of his being, the veins on his forehead and neck standing out. The sound echoed painfully within his lonely cockpit, as he furiously slammed and hammered the useless controls with his fists in grief. _At failing to prevent it._

_At failing._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The feels I had whilst writing this, were enhanced by the following tracks: - 
> 
> 'Combat Drop', James Horner - The Resistance Ships taking fire begin to attack.
> 
> 'Elegy', Michael Salvatori - Rey and Luke resume their training. 
> 
> 'The Battle of Yavin', John Williams - Kylo chasing down Poe; the change in tempo signifying Jess entering the skirmish and into their joint dog-fight. 
> 
> 'Excerpt from the Union', Michael Salvatori - Poe and Jess begin their attack run on the cannons.  
> 'Hope', Michael Giachinno - The 5th Fleet arrives and The Raddus succumbs to its wounds. 
> 
> 'The Starkiller', John Williams - Kylo sensing the destruction of the bridge of The Raddus.


	20. Glimmer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe and the Resistance try to piece together the weight of what has happened on The Raddus.
> 
> Ben reacts to the news of his Mother. As does Kylo. And Rey. 
> 
> Hux and Phasma must make a tough call.
> 
> Poe reports to The Scarif.

Poe’s eyes were torn between his tactical display and the Resistance flagship the moment he saw the white flare jetting out into the black from where the bridge viewport had been.

He heard a low, plaintive whistle from BB, but didn’t fully register what his small companion had said. It was difficult for him to discern what exactly had happened in that moment, the silence punctuated only by the frequent, jarring transmissions as the Resistance fleet commanders tried to piece together what it _meant._ A harsh hiss of static, snapped his attention back to within his own cockpit, before it settled into a silent, but open comm-line.

“This is Admiral Statura of _The Scarif,_ assuming command. Continue your attack runs. Push the Destroyers back,” came the firm order from his in-helmet headset. Poe blinked, the light from the nearby star, suddenly seeming _too_ bright.

“ _Poe?_ Does that mean- ?” Jess asked, her unspoken question hanging heavily in the space between them as her ship circled nearby, while another heavy volley from the Resistance fleet shot overhead, hammering the First Order ships. Pushing the numb, icy feeling which had settled in his chest to one side, Poe gripped the controls so tightly that the sensation began to leave his hands. Re-checking his displays as he flew in a slow sweeping circle, he began to feel the coldness receding, instead being rapidly replaced by a burning anger.

“We can deal with that later, Jess... _You heard the man._ We’ve still got a _job_ to do,” he growled, earning a concerned series of beeps from his small astromech.

“ _Aye, sir,_ ” affirmed his wingwoman - forming up to his right, as they flew together back into the fray. Poe could feel a tingling sensation in the back of his head, like the one he had felt during his frantic dogfight with the demonic looking TIE fighter earlier. It felt _familiar,_ but shaking himself, Poe refocused solely on the task at hand. _Gone_ was any joviality. Now he was all business. They _had_ to succeed now. Another torrential barrage from the Resistance fleet ripped the communications tower off the furthest out Star Destroyer, plasma erupting from it out into the night. A second volley a moment later tore it clean in half, forcing the First Order ship nearest it to attempt an evasive manoeuvre to avoid collision. Instead, it left itself more open to attack and like carnivores circling a lame animal, drew the hail of fire from the 5th Fleet ships surrounding it.

Poe couldn’t help but release a grim smile at that. _Good,_ he thought to himself, as they continued to barrel towards the battle. Spotting that the remaining enemy combatants were beginning to pull back in closer and closer to their own capital ships, Poe leaned forward more heavily on his controls - Jess tailing him close behind.                                                                                                  

                                                                                   

* * *

 

 

Realising quickly that they were growing more and more outnumbered and the tide was beginning to turn, Hux’s survival instincts kicked in. It was something he had always been _exceedingly_ good at. Striding to the front of the catwalk between the banks of bridge tactical arrays on _The Finalizer,_ he stared out into the battle _. It was lost._ The _war_ was _not._ Running over the odds in his head, he strode back up the catwalk again and then twice more quickly, just to be sure.

“Call everything that can still fly, back. Then issue the order to retreat. _Now!_ ” he barked, not even deigning to raise his head from the datapad displaying the live stream of battle data he had returned to being engrossed in.

 _“General?”_ asked Lieutenant Mitaka, a tentative air in his tone.

It wasn’t _unusual_ per se, but Hux noted the slight _uncharacteristic_ urgency within it. “What is it?” he asked, his tone clipped as he cast a brief sideways glance towards the young officer.

“It’s Lord Ren, Sir… his ship’s transponder is transmitting an automatic distress signal,” he began, trembling slightly when the flame-haired General’s head whipped up, eyes now fixed firmly on him, “It-it appears to be _drifting,_ although scans are still showing his life support as operational…”

Disappointment ghosted across Hux’s face, which had _not_ been missed by Phasma, whom he had come to a stop next to. Smoothing his hand over his hair, his expression quickly returned to neutral. Raising a hand, he pointed over to one of the dispatching comms officers, “Launch a retrieval craft. Tell it to _hurry._ ”

“Yes, Sir,” they responded, sitting ramrod straight at the order.

The young General sauntered back over to the steely Stormtrooper Captain, arching a sculpted eyebrow at her when she tilted her head in question. She had not let go of her earlier suspicion that he had not been _happy_ the young Sith Lord had survived.

“Oh, _Phasma…_ You know as well as I do, we won’t be _that_ lucky…” he muttered in mild annoyance, as he returned his attention to his tactical review.

“ _‘We’_ , Sir?” she asked, her tone pointed as she rounded on him. Despite the great lengths he had gone to, to smooth things over after Dantooine, her suspicions of his involvement in Kabira Ren’s presence – not to mention what had happened to Kylo and least of all, to her own men – remained.

“Fine… _I_ won’t,” he replied nonchalantly, pausing in his stride as he threw a knowing look over his shoulder at her, “Are you coming?”

“Shouldn’t we-?” She asked, her body still angled towards the bridge.

“ _Come off it,_ Phasma…” he growled, stalking out of the bridge with the fabric of his long black coat whipping behind him, while the chrome-armoured captain hesitated by the door.

“If it makes you feel better, consider it an _order!_ ” he yelled from down the corridor, before he disappeared round the next corner. Hearing her longer strides pounding down the corridor behind him, he slowed his hurried pace ever-so-slightly.

“ _Sir,_ shouldn’t we wait until the ship has powered up the drive-?” she asked, her tone hard as iron. Hux could have shaken his head at her reaction. It was _predictable._ One of Phasma’s greatest assets was her staunch loyalty to her crew, but in situations such as this one, it was only a hinderance to the greater cause.

“I’ve already signalled the retrieval craft to meet us in the hangar,” he muttered, hammering at the surface of the data pad harder than was necessary, barely making the effort to hide his irritation.

“ _But, General-,_ ” she continued, her footsteps halting behind him. On the of it sound reaching his ears, the ambitious young officer stopped in his tracks. Conflict played across his features, as his shoulders slumped almost imperceptibly, but still enough for the sharp-eyed captain to spot it. Shoving it aside a moment later, he squared his shoulders again.

“You _know_ as well as I do, that in order to be _effective_ , we have to occasionally _concede,_ Captain,” he began, trying to measure his tone with her.

“Shouldn’t we stay with the ship, though?” she pressed, taking a step towards him. His face concealed by the dull of the corridor in its emergency lighting, he half-turned towards her, looking her straight in the eye.

“ _They’ll_ be fine, but _we_ have to inform the _Supreme Leader,_ ” he responded, the conviction behind his own half-truth surprising even himself. His eyes narrowed into a frown as he looked away again, torn between her reminding him of _his_ duty to his crew and his belief in his _greater_ one to his superior. Silence passed between them for a moment, before they both had to brace themselves against the bulkhead, as the ship was rocked by a furious tremor.

“I… _understand,_ ” she whispered, her modulated voice barely audible in the din of the ship’s hull groaning under the strain of the enemy fire it was under. Hux didn’t miss the alien sympathy in her voice. He smiled slightly at that. _Duty before honour,_ he thought to himself and Phasma was nothing if not a dutiful creature.

“We need to hurry,” he murmured, breaking into a swift march towards the lift to the hangar bay. Smashing his hand on the lift controls on the console, just as she crossed into the car, they both watched as a surge of flame rushed down the corridor towards them before the doors to the car guillotined shut. They stood in quiet for what drew out like an age, until the doors to the hangar finally opened, revealing a scene of complete chaos.   

                                                                                                                                                                                               

* * *

                                                                            

Ben sat on his knees - numb to the cool night sand - as he kneeled below the veiled moon and stars, within his prison. Alone, before the fledgling Force Tree. _Defeated._

He hadn’t been able to protect her. Just like his father. Just like Reina.

He had _failed._ Again. Yet, the tears never came. He wanted to let it all out so desperately, but he knew all too well the fury that still lurked in the background. To let _that_ out would be folly. He had done that once before and it had led to… _this._ It had led to _him._

His mind drifted to Rey; he could sense her concern out there. Somewhere. He wished she were here. To tell him it would all be okay. That he didn’t need to worry. That he didn’t need to be sorry. But he was. The pain lanced his heart, like needles of ice. A thousand tiny shards that tore and clawed like shrapnel. Even though he knew that he hadn’t been _directly_ involved, he could not shake the guilt which followed. It snapped at his heels like a starving wolf. Always there.

 _Except when Rey is with me,_ he thought, bitterly. He had grown to enjoy her company, to look _forward_ to it. But, in doing so he had realised then that to let her in would leave her open to the universe ripping her away from him. To _him_ ripping her away from him. He swore to himself then, that he _would not_ allow that to happen. He _couldn’t._ _He_ had already taken so _much._

Dropping his hands to his knees, bowing his head like a supplicant, he suddenly felt a faint glimmer of warmth. Ben’s eyes snapped open again. _It couldn’t be…_ he thought to himself, _I felt it._

It vanished for a few moments, as he rose to stand again, unsteadily as a second wave of feeling hit him.

_Mother._

_She was still alive._

Faint, but it _was_ her. He knew from how much her presence in the Force flickered, that he 0had to hurry. Ben closed his eyes, before he lowered himself on one knee, resting his hand upon the surface of the sand. He didn’t know if it would work, but he had _almost_ succeeded the last time…

Summoning as much of his power as he could to send a pulse out - to _try_ to break through - he collected the Force around him. He drew as much from himself as he could from the tree, before releasing it in a nuclear white flash, sending a powerful shockwave rippling through the sand in the wastes around him.

 _I’m still here,_ he thought - a hardness to his inner voice - as he furrowed his brow, _even if you’re determined to pretend that I’m dead._ _Keep thinking that if you want but do something. She loved you - loved us…,_ Ben growled inwardly to himself.                                                                                               

                                                                                           

* * *

 

 

Kylo sat alone in his cockpit, drifting listlessly - his primeval howls of pain still ringing loud in his ears. His skin was cool and damp with perspiration and his breathing remained heavy. A frigid sensation had spread from his chest to his limbs as he sat there, staring blankly out into the starfield beyond the battle.

A memory of a _less complicated_ life flickered into being within his mind’s eye... His father was due to return from a mission, along with Uncle Chewbacca, after an extended period away. Mama had sent a message - via one of her many aides - that she would be finishing at the senate early to come get him from school and that they would go to the docks together to meet Dad when he arrived.

He remembered being unable to contain his excitement and was barely able to concentrate in class that day. It wasn’t that he hadn’t loved being with Mama - _or with Dad_ – but he loved when they were all together again. It hadn’t escaped him that this was something that happened less and less the older he got. Dad had spent more time away then and he hadn’t minded, as Mama had _always_ shared with him how important the mission, he was on was. However, _the pain_ that had been in her eyes, had stayed with Kylo.

She had entered his classroom – flanked by two guards - at the Senate School on Coruscant, briefly talking in hushed tones with his teacher, before she had walked up to where he sat near the back of the class. He remembered how stunning she looked. And how sad. She strode towards him – graceful as ever in her poise – her caped, pale grey gown flowing behind her. She smiled at every student she sensed gazing at her and came to a stop at his desk.

“Well, _little prince_ – are you ready to go greet your Father?” she asked, holding out her manicured hand patiently. He watched her for a moment, before turning his desk holo-display off and leaping up to place his hand in hers with a bright grin. They swept out of the classroom a moment later, the two guards who had accompanied here bringing up the rear, with another two that had been stationed outside now taking up point.

They marched along the corridors of the Senate building until their entourage reached the lifts, riding one down to the docking bay level. While within it, he remembered how she had looked at him, tutting gently when she had spotted the dark ink smudged on his chin and crouched down to tidy him up. She gently combed her fingers through his dark waves and after a brief lick of the inner hem of the gown’s sleeve, she began her grooming.

A slight blush crept up into his neck and cheeks when he realised, she’d felt the need to dirty her state clothing – even if she always attempted to hide it. He regarded her, with owl-like dark eyes.

“ _Hmm,_ ” she smiled wryly, pausing for a moment, her hazel eyes alight with mischief, “Looks like there _might_ be a prince under here, after all…”

She resumed gently scrubbing his chin with the fabric a moment later. The lift slowed to a halt and the front two guards darted out, scouting ahead. She glanced once over shoulder, then finished cleaning him, before rising again and offering her hand once more.

“Well, shall we go find him?” she laughed gently, before leading him down to where the Millennium Falcon had just landed. He recalled how serene her face had seemed then, but that it had never quite travelled to her eyes.

The smile faltered the closer they had drawn to the freighter, although returned when she realised, he was watching her. The sound of the ramp deploying had reached his ears then and he had cast her a look asking for permission – to which she had nodded proudly – before he ran down the large hangar swiftly to meet his errant Father, who had begun to stalk down from the other end towards them. Without pausing his stride, he swept his son up in his arms tightly, swinging him around and around in a tight embrace before eventually balancing him on his shoulder effortlessly – as Chewbacca called down fondly close behind. They chatted the whole way back up to where Mama had stood – more beautiful than the myriad memorials to heroes _long_ forgotten by the people, which lined the precinct within the presidium before the central Senate building.

The lonely, but joyous, wet look which had been in her eyes that day as she had watched the love of her life - and their son - had _never_ left him.

He would never know if it had been for himself. Or for his Father. Or both.

He could feel the cold still in his chest. _Damn you…_ he thought to himself, as he clamped his eyes tightly shut, forehead creased. Despite all his posturing and vocal assertions to the contrary - despite _all_ that he had done - that weak boy still clung on within him.

‘I _am_ you…’ he thought he heard, in the back of his head. His eyes snapping open, flying around the cockpit, wild. When nothing else came, he began to settle again. Just as he began to wallow once more, he felt a faint warmth. Not Rey. _No…_ he thought, _it can’t be…_ Then a second sensation hit him. It nearly took the breath back out of his lungs.

_Mother… She was still alive. Just…_

‘I’m still here,’ a hard voice – sounding like himself, yet not - whispered in his ear, causing the Sith Lord to frown, ‘Even if you’re determined to pretend that I’m _dead,_ ’ it seemed to hiss. ‘Keep thinking that if you want but _do_ something. _She loved you._ She loved _us…,_ ’ it growled, it’s power almost deafening.

Kylo didn’t question it. He didn’t hesitate. He instinctively threw out his senses, searching for her. He pored himself out further and further, over every inch of debris and faint movement in the battle, desperation beginning to bleed into his signature so deeply that he felt a ripple of concern from Rey again. Drawing on that, he pushed out again. She felt so _cold._ But she was still with him. A wave of relief washed over him, before he felt her flickering, the threat even clearer to him. Channelling something deep within himself, Kylo used every ounce of strength he could muster to throw his mother’s form as gently as he could, back within the emergency barrier on The Raddus which had engaged a moment too late.

He had fleetingly felt a warm sensation from Rey – pleased for him - before he felt his eyelids flicker, and everything went dark.                                                                                               

                                                                                           

* * *

 

 

Rey sat, in joined meditation with her master, as they had both tried to steady themselves following the grim sensations which had assaulted them both since the start of the battle. Her eyebrows were knitted together in determination as she tried with all the might she could will, to push it all away. _Please,_ she thought to herself, _please don’t let it be true…_

Sensing nothing but a calmness from her Master, Rey tried to draw from that. She couldn’t bear the pain from the assault on the fuelling station. The horrible cry she had felt rip through her, from _him._ _Then,_ at almost the same time, she had felt the tearing, pleading pull from _Ben._ Like he railed against the very fabric of the Galaxy itself. Rey realised then, that this was the only other time she had ever felt them _both –_ together, like one - since that night in the desert. Her heart lifted a little at that.

As she felt a strange wave of… defiance… from Ben, it hit her. It was so _very_ faint. A small, but very bright spark of Light.

 _Leia._ She was _still_ alive. She felt her Master squeezing her hand, heard the soft rumble as his serene façade crumbled into a deep sob.

He _had_ been worried.

Rey had never known the bond of having a sibling, so she knew she could never imagine what that must feel like, but she _had_ had a family once. She felt in _Finn_ and _Chewie_ she had gained another. _Han…_ had been snatched away from her as her own family had. _Poe,_ well, she knew she didn’t see him as family… not with how he’d made her feel. Ben… Ben she felt drawn to - as she did with Kylo - but in no way did that feel… _familial._ It felt so much _more_ than that. Like a _kindredness_. A _wholeness._ She felt heat rising in her cheeks at the very thought, yet it did not unsettle her as much as it once would have.

Then she felt a powerful surge through the Force from Kylo. And Ben. A sensation like relief. They had _saved_ her. Leia was safe. Rey’s heart soared. She felt a tentative ripple from Kylo and an even fainter, wavering caress from Ben. Then nothing. Panic flooded her veins, prompting her to open her eyes.

“ _Easy,_ Rey,” came the gentle, cracked voice of Luke, “She’s okay,” he continued, before taking a lengthy pause to fix her with a searching look. Then, realisation bleeding into his eyes, as he still watched her, “…they _all_ are,” he smiled, softly. Rey worried slightly then, that he _knew_ that she felt something towards Kylo - despite how much she told herself she cared more about Ben. And Poe. When he said nothing more, she merely followed him to stand quietly, as he gestured for her to follow him back towards their settlement as the sun began to set. Rey stood for a moment, closing her eyes as she soaked in the last of the warm sunlight. Enjoying it on her skin. Thinking of Ben.

_Of Kylo._

Then she pulled her things towards her and followed the path downhill to her Master, who waited patiently for her. 

                                                                               

* * *

                                                                                   

Hux couldn’t help but sneer as the retrieval craft swung in with Kylo’s damaged fighter in its tractor beam. Depositing it gently, Hux ordered Phasma to begin powering up the drive on Ren’s command shuttle as he strode over to the smoking husk of the TIE.

“Get him out of it at once!” he roared at the hangar crew, pacing impatiently as they released the seals on the hatch. He stifled a laugh as it took not one, not two, but three bridge crew to haul Ren’s broad, lanky, limp frame out of the small hatch. Especially as soon as he spotted, he was unconscious.

“Should we get him to the medbay?” asked one, a concerned but nervous expression on their face. Restraining himself from all but rolling his eyes, the young General merely barked for a stretcher to brought over and for Ren to be carried onto the shuttle, announcing when there were protests from the hangar aid crew that there was ‘no time’. He met Phasma’s steady gaze, as he strode up the ramp onto the command shuttle, cutting her off momentarily as he strapped in at the controls. He shouted over his shoulder for her to close the ramp. Dutifully complying, she lingered by the prone form of the Sith Lord, strapped to the bench seat to the rear of the cockpit.

“Stop fussing, Phasma. _He’s fine…_ ” he urged, briefly offering her an unusually gentle smile. It was gone all too soon. She strapped herself quickly into the co-pilot’s chair, softly setting down her helmet to one side as her frost blue eyes flickered across to his. “I _do_ prefer you without that, you know,” he smiled again, eyes flickering down to her helmet, before quickly returning them to the viewport as he swung them around and out of the hangar bay, “ _…unlike him,_ ” he muttered, as he jerked his head to behind them.

“Are you _sure_ about this?” she asked, her golden lash-rimmed eyes locking with his, trying to make certain that they were doing the right thing.

“We _have_ to, Phasma,” he ground out, pushing harder on the controls, to ready them for the jump. Just as their shuttle began to lurch with the tell-tale movement into hyperspace, the sound of Kylo beginning to stir, reached them. A low groaning escaped his lips, causing Phasma to unclip her seat harness to move aft towards him. Hux’s head whipped round briefly at the action.

“Where _are_ we, Phasma?” Kylo asked, voice groggy and hoarse, as he pulled himself up to sit, with her offered arm.

 _Typical..._ thought Hux, grumpily.

“We’re _reporting_ to Supreme Leader Snoke,” answered Hux, matter-of-factly.

“Why are we not taking The Finalizer?” demanded Kylo, as he tried to stand – his faculties starting to return to him, before Phasma pushed him gently, but firmly back. Her eyes warning him to ‘stay put’.

“Because _you_ are _not_ in command,” spat Hux, throwing a withering look at the Sith Lord over his shoulder.

“So, we’re _turning tail_ instead?” challenged Kylo, feeling his boldness return as he became more and more conscious.

“We cannot deliver a detailed report, if we are _dead!”_ hissed the fiery-maned General. Disdain dripped from his tone. Kylo sat in a silence like that of the dead. Phasma did not miss the uncharacteristic quiet which had fallen over them, following Hux’s retort. Then she felt the pressure in her chest, as it coiled over her limbs and her throat, holding her in place. She heard Hux begin to cough, at first as if he was clearing his throat.

“ _You,_ ” roared Kylo in accusation, his strength beginning to return to him more and more with each passing second, “You were going to _leave_ me there. _To die,_ ” he bellowed, prowling towards the spluttering young General. Hux began to hack and gurgle as he clawed at his throat, the pressure crushing his larynx and forcing the air from his lungs, as he was lifted against the seat harness. Phasma’s eyes flew to Kylo’s, as she softly shook her head, silently asking him to stop. He merely narrowed his eyes to obsidian slits, seething in his expression, as the colour started to drain from Hux’s face. The General’s eyes rolled back in his head as his feet began to flail more desperately, eyes growing bloodshot.

“ _Kylo…_ ” she ground out, “ _Don’t_ do this… we’re on the _same_ side…”

Her words finally registering through his rage, Kylo dropped his foe, as if he were nothing. He watched as she rushed over to the gasping General, cradling his limp head. _“Are we?”_ he spat, before he stomped off into his cabin, locking the door firmly behind him.                                                                                               

                                                                                       

* * *

 

 

Poe chased the last of the fleeing TIE’s back towards the battered and retreating First Order Star Destroyers, emboldened beyond his usual brashness. He shot down _everything_ he could before they disappeared beyond his reach.

“Sir,” came Jess’s voice through his headset.

He continued chasing down whatever he could.

“ _Sir,_ ” she pressed, her X-Wing now visible out of the corner of his right eye, cursing as she dodged the last of the defensive fire. Still, he did not respond.

“ _Sir!_ ” she shouted, almost having to throw her ship across his flight path to stop him, when he came to his senses and realised, he was flying in _empty_ stars.

“ _Jess?_ ” he asked, wondering how much time had passed, the anger he had felt beginning to recede.

“We’re being recalled back to the ships, sir,” she responded, a lilt of concern seeping into her voice. They flew in silence for most of the rest of the way back, gently swinging their X-Wings back – in tandem – towards the amassed fleets. Both sets of eyes passing over the ailing form of The Raddus, which drifted at the centre, still ejecting jets of plasma out from badly damaged sections of hull.

“ _Stars,_ ” muttered Jess, over the comm, as they sailed past.

“Order’s coming in to report to The Scarif,” murmured Poe, as they continued onwards, beginning their descent towards the battered, but still fully operational 5th Fleet craft.                                                                                               

                                                                                           

* * *

 

 

Lieutenant Connix clawed and pounded at the thick metal door with her bare fists, tears rolling down her face in disbelief that her General – _their rock_ – had been _spaced._

Major Brance stood off behind her, unsure of what to do. He had only _just_ succeeded in bodily hauling her out of the bridge before it had completely decompressed. She had screamed and cursed at him that General Organa had still been alive, before he had released her, unable to hold her back anymore. A few moments earlier, she had rounded on him, distraught and slapped him hard across the face. He couldn’t find the words to say. He _knew_ they had to move, to get to a _sounder_ deck, but he couldn’t leave her, and he’d probably have to stun her before she would go willingly.

She was _painfully_ loyal. It was admirable, he decided as he watched her, her shoulders heaving as she pressed her forehead to the door. Neither of them noticed the shadow that passed the small viewport of the door which had sealed the bulkhead between the corridor and the bridge, at least not at first.

“ _Kaydel…_ ” he spoke her name softly, as he placed a hand gently on her shoulder, pulling her into a gentle soothing embrace. He bowed his head as he held her, then his eye caught a shadow against the door, as he briefly looked up. She didn’t miss the tremble that ran through him. Like fright. “Kaydel, open the door,” he said hurriedly, releasing her.

“What? Are you _out_ of your _mind?_ ” she balked whilst she turned around to see what had disturbed him so and froze on the spot as she saw the face at the glass. “ _Taslin…_ thank the Force…” she murmured to him, exchanging a look before her fingers flew over the door controls.

The young Major darted down to catch the shivering General, as she collapsed through the door, once the Lieutenant had managed to open it.

“Get a medic up here - _now!_ ” he shouted; his eyes frantic when they met Kaydel’s. Nodding, almost in disbelief, she sprinted to a direct comm port and called up the medbay. Her heart pounded in her ears as she waited for a response.                                                                                             

                                                             

* * *

 

 

Poe and Jess had debriefed shortly after their landing on The Scarif, with many of the crew of The Raddus having been shuttled over whilst the full extent of the damage was assessed. Jess had since left for the repair bay, to get Bullseye patched up. Poe had braced himself against the rails around the holo-emitter, whilst Admiral Statura had notified the command personnel that General Leia had been _found -_ _alive,_ but badly wounded. He was concerned - but also overjoyed - to hear that his steely CO was still clinging on.

Asking if she had been transferred over to the medbay on The Scarif, Poe and BB were directed over to a registry port next to the medbay doors, by an understanding but _exasperated_ nurse. Scanning through the list of names, he saw no sign of the General’s, but spotted one he should still go and check on. Pushing through the crowded personnel outside of the medbay, his faithful astromech trailing a short distance behind, he flashed his clearance and was quickly ushered into a ward towards the back. He headed towards a single room with a large bacta bath. A gentle expression settled on his face, as he spotted his friend, still in his medically maintained coma.

 _He looks peaceful at least,_ he thought. Poe was thankful that in all of what had gone on around them, that at least Finn had been left untouched. Settling into his usual perch, on the metal seat by the tank, Poe reached into his jacket pocket – his hand searching for the small datapad he read from each time he visited. BB bumped against the tank briefly, releasing a soft whistle, before settling by Poe’s feet. Placing his hand gently against the glass of the tank, he smiled, “Sorry… I’ve been held up a bit since my last visit. I was deployed for a bit - but I got a chance to check in on _your girl,_ Rey…”

He couldn’t help the wider grin which tugged on his features as he thought of their time together, “She’s, uh… _interesting!_ ” Just as he powered on his data pad, Finn’s arm twitched, as if he had _heard_ him. “Hey, _hey,_ I didn’t know you had a _thing_ for her, buddy…” laughed Poe, as he watched Finn beginning to move more. The warning sounds now coming from the monitoring equipment, caused Poe to frown and jump up from his seat, ready to call for the medbay staff as Finn began to thrash more wildly. Without warning, Finn surged out of the water, gasping and hauling at the diodes on his chest and arms, as if he were remembering how to breathe air.

“ _Whoa there!_ _Easy, big guy…_ ” soothed Poe, his arms flying out to steady his friend. Letting Finn bring his breathing back under control, whilst his eyes refocused in the dim light, Poe waited patiently. Finn slowly turned his head to meet Poe’s gaze, his soft brown eyes locking with those of his friend, realisation flooding into them as he looked around for something. Suddenly, his arm shot out of the bacta to grasp Poe’s, almost in a death grip. “ _Poe?_ Where’s Rey - _where is she?_ ” he asked, an air of desperation in his tone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The feels I had whilst writing this, were enhanced by the following tracks: - 
> 
> 'End of the Line’, Henry Jackman – Poe witnessing the bridge of The Raddus and Admiral Statura’s announcement.
> 
> 'Bastard', Ramin Djawadi (Up to 3:10 only) – Hux and Phasma make their decision to retreat.
> 
> ‘Final Confluence', Austin Wintory – Ben cursing his lot, until he feels Leia, building with him releasing his shockwave as the strings build up.
> 
> ‘To Know Water', Austin Wintory – Those of you keeping track will probably have noticed I used this before for a timeskip. 
> 
> 'Jyn Erso & Hope Suite', Michael Giachinno (Up to 2:02ish only) – Rey and Luke, as they try to meditate to keep themselves centred, leading into Rey and Luke returning to camp.
> 
> ‘Son of the Dragon’, Ramin Djawadi – Hux and Phasma retreat, as the vocals creep in from the background Kylo comes to, before he Force-chokes Hux and the horns begin to pulse – like a heartbeat.
> 
> ‘Out of Gas/Empty Derelict’, Greg Edmonson – Poe frantically chases down the First Order, before he and Jess return to The Scarif.
> 
> ‘An Impossible Burden’, Clinton Shorter – Kaydel and Taslin make a discovery.
> 
> ‘Excerpt 1 from The Rose’, Michael Salvatori – Poe returning to The Scarif, reading to Finn and as the crescendo rises, Finn asks where Rey is.
> 
> Thank you everyone who has been reading so far and for your patience between updates :) A story I've really enjoyed is the Reylo fanfic 'Nolite te bastardes carborundorum' by SaintHeretical and I hope they choose to continue it when they have the time - it's too good not to!


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